Its good practice. You can ask about that when you are asking for consent before you do anything
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Do you ask your partner about STDs before having sex or just use a condom and go?
- Thread starter Elegant Weapon
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Elegant Weapon
Member
I'm not asking if it's good practice. I want to know do you literally ask people if you can kiss them and if they get cold sores before you kiss
Sweet Bellic
Member
This. Would you seriously forgo using a condom just because someone says they are clean? They may have no idea, or be lying. Shit, we have another thread on GAF right now where some folks are defending knowingly having sexual relations with someone else without disclosing they have HIV.
Protect yourself.
Elegant Weapon
Member
If you're that concerned, why don't you wait until you see their paperwork or get tested together?
I'm a grown ass adult with the maturity to make my own fucking decisions.
I don't place much stock in "asking" because people can easily lie.
So I don't enter into sexual situations that I'm not prepared to deal with the consequences of, because my sexual health is my own responsibility and nobody fucking else's.
This means I use condoms, and make no excuses for it.
If this isn't enough for me, then I don't have sex. It's really that simple. The option to not fuck is always on the table.
I don't place much stock in "asking" because people can easily lie.
So I don't enter into sexual situations that I'm not prepared to deal with the consequences of, because my sexual health is my own responsibility and nobody fucking else's.
This means I use condoms, and make no excuses for it.
If this isn't enough for me, then I don't have sex. It's really that simple. The option to not fuck is always on the table.
Fulminator
Member
ok real talk, i feel really uncomfortable sometimes about not using condoms, both because of STD and pregnancy issues, but they literally make my dick basically numb
e: fwiw I'm in a monogamous relationship (~4 months), so not super worried about STD at this point, but pregnancy for sure
how can i overcome this??
e: fwiw I'm in a monogamous relationship (~4 months), so not super worried about STD at this point, but pregnancy for sure
how can i overcome this??
pokeystaples
Banned
When I was single I got checked every 6 months. My brother is HIV positive so I don't fuck around when it comes to testing, asking and being open and honest.
Before I started having sex with my, now, wife we both went and got tested then had ice cream after. When we got the results back we had a nice dinner and got down. She will, hopefully, be my last sexual partner.
Before I started having sex with my, now, wife we both went and got tested then had ice cream after. When we got the results back we had a nice dinner and got down. She will, hopefully, be my last sexual partner.
Sweet Bellic
Member
Why do that when a condom should suffice?
Though that's a great idea if you and your partner plan to have unprotected sex, which is, admittedly, the best kind (especially for the long haul).
Yep. Ask and wrap anyway until it's a long term relationship. Then re-discuss your birth control situation if you so desire.
Pretty much this. If you're young and single and just having fun, requiring paperwork kind of kills the vibe. Always use a condom, and when you do get into a committed relationship, get tested before going bareback.
brianmcdoogle
Member
Since most people in here think asking is a good thing, here's something on the flip side going on in this thread where a user is arguing some HIV positive people shouldn't disclose their status to others.
Crazyorloco
Member
We get these freaking threads the day I might have a girl over. Lol. Its a sign, Im asking her tonight...
The older I get the more nervous I get about these things. When I was younger I wouldnt ask, it felt weird and I was worried that the person somehow wouldnt be interested in me. I always ask now. And I get tested before each partner.
Im perfectly fine with masturbating if it means I wont have an STD. Its hard for me to trust. People lie often. My last ex taught me that. :-/ Be cautious.
The older I get the more nervous I get about these things. When I was younger I wouldnt ask, it felt weird and I was worried that the person somehow wouldnt be interested in me. I always ask now. And I get tested before each partner.
Im perfectly fine with masturbating if it means I wont have an STD. Its hard for me to trust. People lie often. My last ex taught me that. :-/ Be cautious.
I ask and I'm proud and honestly impressed that other gaffers do the same
"Hey, kind of a weird topic but I just want to make sure, have you been tested and are you clean or...?"
Some awkward variation of the above but usually the other party totally appreciates where I'm coming from
"Hey, kind of a weird topic but I just want to make sure, have you been tested and are you clean or...?"
Some awkward variation of the above but usually the other party totally appreciates where I'm coming from
IISANDERII
Member
the condoms I use also cover the tip of the penis.
The condoms I use only ever cover the tip of the penis.
I'm sure most of you gaffers understand the struggle?
Elegant Weapon
Member
You think covering the dick is enough to avoid catching something?
MegaManTrigger
Banned
"Kills the vibe" is such a stupid thing to think, your safety should be above anything else.
PoorChoices
Member
No, I don't ask, nor do I use condoms.
To be fair though, I've been married for 6 years, I had a vasectomy, and wife got an IUD implant. I think my wife would kick my ass though if I DID ask at this point in the game.
To be fair though, I've been married for 6 years, I had a vasectomy, and wife got an IUD implant. I think my wife would kick my ass though if I DID ask at this point in the game.
The expectation that one should get tested or produce paperwork before every sexual encounter is also ridiculous.
Elegant Weapon
Member
One poster said "it's good practice" to ask if someone gets cold sores before kissing
like, who actually does that?
OG Shaka Zulu
Member
No questions asked, I stay strapped. I'm responsible for my own safety.
Shadow Puppetry
Member
Freakin ask.
pixelation
Member
Eventhough the possibilities are miniscule, you can also het HIV through oral sex (depending on the oral higiene (bloody gums) of the person giving the oral sex, or small cuts or sores on your penis).
Elegant Weapon
Member
I don't know how true that is; most new cases go genital herpes comes from oral sex. You think most people are getting genital herpes from people with visible oral sores?
hydragonwarrior
Member
I've asked, and we start anyway. Otherwise it'd affect my mood which would affect what I can do and I won't enjoy myself.
faulty_fork
Member
I would expect her to bring it up if she had something, asking just seems awkward. Condoms until I know she's on birth control and cool with doing it without.
Strangelove77
Member
Asking seems kind of pointless so I don't do it.
But using a condom goes without saying.
But using a condom goes without saying.
Chuck Norris
Banned
Well you can either enjoy the fact you'll be a father soon or be a selfish prick and force your girlfriend to go through an abortion cause a condom is slightly less good
Elegant Weapon
Member
Or do some kegals and not nut inside her.
How do you or she know that you don't have anything?
IISANDERII
Member
Everything but a feeling
You circumcised? I only ever hear this lack of sensitivity stuff from circumcised men or men using condoms too small for their dicks
It should be noted (since I didn't know and most people I've talked to didn't either), that asking for the standard STD panel does not usually include herpes testing. I found this out recently when I had a scare (all was good) and was told because of the way the testing is confused by the virus existing anywhere in the body, they usually don't include it.
faulty_fork
Member
There's never been anything wrong with my dick so I guess I trust that
. That's the only thing I can tell her if she asks. I've never met anyone that insist on us getting tested before sex, but if it was important for her I would of course get myself checked.
Soodanim
Gold Member
I'm under the impression that you're just wearing the wrong size, look into that if you ever need to get condoms again. Dumbness suggests that it's too tight. If it's possible to have allergic reactions that have the effect of numbness I've not heard of it.
You sound like a really fun person xoxo
Elegant Weapon
Member
There's never been anything wrong with my dick so I guess I trust that
That's more than a bit naive but that's why I'm asking these questions
Fyi, lack of visible symptoms don't mean much, especially if you think they're going to show exclusively on your dick
It's why you're supposed to get tested regularly but whatever "works" for y'all
Wear a condom that fits your penis in width and length so that you don't cut off the blood flow.
Mine's regular sized but I can't wear the average condom comfortably.
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