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[Trogdor1123]

I do vividly. I was very young. It happened after I watched a scene in Robotech where the zentradi essentially obliterated man kind. A scene has a little kid talking to a soldier then dying in a firey blast. gave me nightmares for weeks. To this day it seriously bothers me . I remember running to my mom crying. I told her I didn't want to die. I said I wished I'd never been born so I would never die. She helped me through this.

Just the silliness of being a kid but death is terribly frightening to me, to this day.

 

[Pejo]

Nope, no clue about the first time, but even worse than death, lately I've been thinking (in existential crisis mode at like 2:00AM on a weekday), just how meaningless every thing I do is. You think about the size of the universe, and how old it is, and even if I became the most famous human of all time, it still amounts to absolutely shit in the scale of things. I'm giving 8+ hours a day to help make someone else more wealthy, of my limited time earth. It's a shitty thing to realize, but it is a bit freeing on certain things. For example, it takes quite a bit to make me embarrassed now because of the same reason.

Then I heard a great quote the other day that threw this whole view out of whack, something like "if you think that a single being can't make a difference, try sleeping in a room with a mosquito", and that made me think.

Humans are fucked because we're self aware, and we worry about this kind of stuff.

 

[Ownage]

Age 38 after my divorce. Realized how much time I had wasted with such a bad choice in life partner, and decided to not spend the remaining moments of my life with bad company.

 

[EightBit Man]

Nope, not really. But it's something I contemplate from time to time. Not in the sense of taking life more seriously than I should, but more in the sense that it's inevitable and instead of dreaded, welcomed. Is there any difference in quantity of death of a insect that lives for one season, or a tree that's there for a thousand years? The season change without interruption, so why this fear of death? Death is one of the greatest taboos of our culture, it is swept under the carpet or even outright denied. Most people cling vehemently to life, and by doing so they strangle themselves and life in the process. We have turned life into a object, something we should "have", instead of experiencing it for what it is.

Just look at how possessive people are when a loved one has a terminal illness. Instead of wanting the person to be released of horrific pain and struggle, they want the person to stay with them as long as they can. That's not love or respect for life...going on while one's condition is terrible, basically inhuman. There are other cultures, mainly indigenous ones who have a completely different attitude towards death, and they know that it's not "the end". There are even ones that celebrate death. I mean how else could it be? Why is there existence? It would be so much easier to have nothing at all. When you have knowledge of your true nature, death is seen as the discarding of clothes.

To me personally the quality of life is far more important than it's length. If I die tomorrow, or in a week, or month, or whenever else I would have peace with it.

 

[Tesseract]

death is the end, your information is destroyed and you are lost

it's the first enemy and the last

 

[off duty ninja]

death is the end, your information is destroyed and you are lost

it's the first enemy and the last

We are born into the light until the time we are pulled back into the dark. The books balance themselves.

Personally I hope I am reincarnated as a kitten with an amazing little kiddo to take care of me next time I come around.

 

[Super Mario]

I rarely think about it. It's scary and permanent, but why ponder it? We created religion to help calm people's nerves about dying because people can't handle reality.

What you should be doing is taking care of yourself. Enjoy every minute of the life you do have. You never know when it is going to end. I know too many people on their death bed, regretting it all. Once your time comes, be able to say you fulfilled all of your hopes and dreams.

 

[GymWolf]

I'm okay with that, we all probably have tumors (benign or not) in our body or some other dangerous shit ready to explode, so just get over it.

 

[Gargus]

Think i was like 12 and was fishing on a good sized stream with my uncle and a topless jeep came flying down the road over a bridge just down from us a bit with a bunch of kids in it. It hit the guard rail in a turn and those kids went flying. One landed face first in the shallow end on the rocks, 1 went in the road and a couple fell down in the trees.

Later my uncle was telling me not to be that stupid and get myself killed. I knew what death was as a concept but it didnt sink in till we talked about it some.

Then when I was like 25 I had an moment of realization that made my life much simpler and less stressful. One day I'd be dead and nothing I do will have mattered and everything that I have done or suffered will be gone. Now I live a happier life and I dont let shit bother me because one day I'll be dead.

 

[Constant Flux]

Think i was like 12 and was fishing on a good sized stream with my uncle and a topless jeep came flying down the road over a bridge just down from us a bit with a bunch of kids in it. It hit the guard rail in a turn and those kids went flying. One landed face first in the shallow end on the rocks, 1 went in the road and a couple fell down in the trees.

Later my uncle was telling me not to be that stupid and get myself killed. I knew what death was as a concept but it didnt sink in till we talked about it some.

Then when I was like 25 I had an moment of realization that made my life much simpler and less stressful. One day I'd be dead and nothing I do will have mattered and everything that I have done or suffered will be gone. Now I live a happier life and I dont let shit bother me because one day I'll be dead.

Deep shit, man.

As for me, I don’t know when I first realized I would die. Probably pretty early on. I’ve pretty much always known death as a part of life, so it’s hard to say.

 

[Thurible]

No. I guess ever since I was aware of the concept of death I knew it was an inevitability.

I don't quite understand the existential dread that comes about from people contemplating their own mortality. Everyone dies, it comes with the experience of living.

What did give me existential dread was when I was little I looked in the mirror and it sometimes gave me an a bit of an identity crisis. I remember feeling like a stranger within my own skin and something just felt......off when I looked at myself.

nothing I do will have mattered

I strongly disagree. Everyone matters and every action results in a consequence, both spiritually and physically.

 

[Gargus]

I strongly disagree. Everyone matters and every action results in a consequence, both spiritually and physically.

Every action has a reaction yes. In the truest sense of the phrase. But there is nothing spiritual about it at all. Me being alive is a tiny pebble tossed in the ocean and nothing more. Yes the currents have been altered a tiny bit and the ocean levels raised a tiny bit but it still means nothing.

To say my life has meaning or I matter is trivializing the universe and trying to bring things down to a level a human can understand so they feel important when they aren't, and they matter when they dont so they dont have to face the fact my life is pointless. The universe is vast and were a spec in it. One day I'll die and my energy that fires all my nerves and synapses will dissipate and that will be that.

If I was never born life would still go on. When I'm dead life will still go on. So yes there are consequences to the actions of my life, but if I was never hear to cause the actions I did things could have turned out much better for others, or worse. There is no way to qualify my existence as being a good or bad thing because the universe is in a constant state of chaos with no rhyme or reason. Things simply happen.

I've seen and been around enough death in my life that I'm not afraid of it. I'm not religous or spiritual as I prefer science and facts and realism. I fully accept I am just a single person out of billions on a rock over 7 billion years old hurtling around in space that extends farther than we can calculate. To this planet alone I am no more than an ant is to me. I accept all of that because to think otherwise is kidding myself.

And i am perfectly content with it all.

 

[DESTROYA]

Yes, when my older brother died from cancer .
Death is coming for all of us one day but going through that ordeal made me realize not worry about dying but to go living and make the best of what limited time you have.

 

[Shadowplay1979]

Yup... I was 22 years old on a CBR F4i 600cc sportbike taking a turn at around 40 mph and hit an oil patch, I tried to recover and when the rear wheel grabbed traction, I immediately high-sided (basically the bike kicks you off like riding a mad bull)... I distinctly remember thinking to myself "Yup I'm dead!" while flying through the air. Somehow landed on grass instead of pavement and survived with some wrist sprains and road rash.



EDIT: this is what a high-side looks like

I rode a 636 and a dumb college kid made a left turn into my right of way..i flew over the hood and landed on my back. Got up and ran to the kids window...i wasnt afraid or scared or thought i was gonna die..i just felt embarrassed even though it was his fault. I just remember him yelling "are you dead are you dead" he was so scared. The only thing that was dead was my bike =( and his garbage insurance didnt pay enough for a new one. Ah well..i drive a CBR now.

 

[Shantae]

I remember I was still pretty young...couldn't have been older than 12. Prior to that, I never really thought of it, but I remember I was just laying in bed reading a book, or at least trying to. Then thoughts started entering my head like...even though I might not die today, tomorrow, or years from now...it's going to happen. Thoughts of everything just ending, and that I am going to be gone, and that everything I know will end....really freaked me out, and I jumped out of my room and starting running and screaming. First panic attack I think. I've actually had that happen a few times since then...sometimes I'll still wake up in the middle of the night with that same sense of fear, where I need to just move and get away from where I am, and I want to scream in fear.

 

[Pumpkin Seeds]

I was between the age of 4 and 6. I forget the exact age. I was considering the story of birth and where my soul/consciousness was before birth. Was it an infinite darkness? It was a dark womb in my head. And then I wondered if death is that same darkness.

This lead to seeing a pscyhologist at the time, because my parents wanted me to see a counselor over their divorce to make sure I knew it wasn't my fault. That seemed dumb to me. I could tell my parents were separating from the fights. Then at some point in the interview, I brought that I was thinking about death and then the Pysch doctor signed me up for a bunch of visits. Within the psych world, the model is that one's own death doesn't enter into the mind that early. So I was some sort of novelty to the doctor.

 

[MastAndo]

Yes, I must have been around 6 years old, and I happened upon a program on TV about dinosaurs - namely, about their extinction. I worshipped dinosaurs as a kid, so this was like a punch in the gut. If the biggest and most ferocious creatures that ever walked the Earth could be wiped out just like that, anything could die. What chance do the rest of us even have?

 

[YukiOnna]

It still eats at me at times. I fear the way I'll die, but more importantly, I fear the death of my family (including my cat since he's 15 and family to me). I'm pretty attached to them even if I don't show it externally so I tend to think about it at times and it just scares me.

I have to come to terms with it at some point though, but since my current goal is to help and work for my family and keep my cat healthy than any personal goal, it's hard.

 

[Thurible]

Every action has a reaction yes. In the truest sense of the phrase. But there is nothing spiritual about it at all.

I respectfully disagree. You have had an impact on others and the whole world, in both small and big ways. You love, and you suffer. You have hurt and helped many people you encountered and have changed others and yourself in some visible and invisible ways.

Life and death are very spiritual and emotional things. Denying that is just silly.

Me being alive is a tiny pebble tossed in the ocean and nothing more. Yes the currents have been altered a tiny bit and the ocean levels raised a tiny bit but it still means nothing.

What makes you a pebble? What makes your actions (even if small) insignificant?

To say my life has meaning or I matter is trivializing the universe and trying to bring things down to a level a human can understand so they feel important when they aren't, and they matter when they dont so they dont have to face the fact my life is pointless.

You are a living human being who has the capacity for reason and love. You are communicating with strangers from different parts of the globe through the internet, a device made for instant wireless communication. The fact you can do all these things and are putting the effort to put your thoughts out there suggests to me that you are important and want to say something to me.

So the universe is a big place, why does that mean you don't matter in it? Does relative size have any significance on the importance of an object? A blue whale is bigger than us, but it does not have any will nor reason, it is not an equal to a man.

If I was never born life would still go on. When I'm dead life will still go on. So yes there are consequences to the actions of my life, but if I was never hear to cause the actions I did things could have turned out much better for others, or worse. There is no way to qualify my existence as being a good or bad thing because the universe is in a constant state of chaos with no rhyme or reason. Things simply happen.

Where is this chaos you speak of? I see order. Everything has a cause and nothing is spontaneous, there is no piece of the world that is random or comes from nothing.

Why do you think your existence has no value? I see no reason to think this way.

I've seen and been around enough death in my life that I'm not afraid of it.

It is good to not be afraid of death, but it is bad to be desensitized to it. Every life has a meaning.

I'm not religous or spiritual as I prefer science and facts and realism.

Those are not mutually exclusive

I fully accept I am just a single person out of billions on a rock over 7 billion years old hurtling around in space that extends farther than we can calculate. To this planet alone I am no more than an ant is to me. I accept all of that because to think otherwise is kidding myself.

What does age or size have to do with anything? Earth is an old planet (it is actually about 4.5 billion years old, not 7 billion years old) and it inhabits space. It revolves around a star much more massive than it in a universe with bigger stars. How does this prove you don't matter? Do you have to not live on a planet that revolves around a star in a universe to matter?

 

[synchronicity]

I don't remember, but death is a constant. Existence is transitory, so the concept of any solidity to identity is just mental fabrication.

Death is now and always. To be afraid of death is the same as being afraid of the next moment. It's the same thing.

 

[Tesseract]

 

[NeoGiffer]

 

[Riven326]

As soon as I emerged from the womb. I said to my mom, well, this is it, isn't It? Post birth abortions are a thing now.

 

[Prison Mike]

Yes I got stabbed outside my own house never seen so much blood

 

[Werewolf Jones]

When I was like 12 and it hits me every time I go to sleep.

One day everyone reading this will be dead, that's the only true equality in life.

 

[Revoh]

When I smoked weed a few years ago and got so high I got a panic attack for the first time, I remember telling my girlfriend to call an ambulance and I truly felt I was going out any minute now, it was the most scary feeling I ever felt, when every passing second feels closer to the end is just a mind bending sensation. Lucky me I just ended up in the hospital with some shots for the anxiety. But the feeling was very much real.

On the other hand, a few months ago I had a dream where I was in an airplane and it crashed, killing everyone, myself included. It was so real and I sensed the moment I "died" everything turned white and I felt the most amazing release ever, it was incredible peaceful, so peaceful in fact that I forced myself to wake up because I didn't want it to end just yet. But I hope death is like that, it gives me hope for when the time truly comes.

 

[Azelover]

Yes, I remember. It was 2001, I was young, and everything was going wrong in my life. I almost killed myself, but I decided to delay it, and I delay it a bunch of times. Eventually I came to a point where I didn't want to do it anymore. And everything got better.

Now I try to talk as many people out of it as I can.

 

[Hazzard4life]

In my early teens I was on my bike and I got hit by a car. From what friends who were there told me, I flew onto the windscreen, into the air and hit the road. I came to pretty quickly and didn't think about death at all. In fact I thought about getting my bike and getting home, until I w as told not to move.... But then something really strange happened. They say your life flashes before your eyes...... That didn't happen but while lying on the road something blurred scrolled from my right eyeto my left, almost in slow motion. It never happened before and hasn't happened since. I can't explain it.

 

[crowbrow]

Goldfish died when I was a little kid.

Realising that he was gone forever. That day I learned about death.

Was it like this?