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[skyfinch]

As someone who has actually ingested other guy's semen, the taste highly varies.

This guy I made out with's breath smelled like chinese food and his semen tasted just the same, if you want sweet tasting semen consume fruits.

My favourite food is taco bell.

 

[realwords]

Et tu, flute?

 

[dripdripsplash]

What a sticky situation.

I laughed

 

[UltraMav]

Seeing the reactions in this thread made me double check the post date to see if this was bumped from like three years ago.

GAF back in top form.

 

[LookAtMeGo]

 

[Rayis]

My favourite food is taco bell.

Your jizz would taste like a quesalupa with a hint of Baja Blast which is not bad!

 

[God Dayumm]

Semen is harmless, nobody is hurt. This is a funny story.

Amir0x, please. No

 

[DiipuSurotu]

How long until

"Dollar bills possibly contamined with semen given to bank patrons"

 

[A Fish Aficionado]

I see viscous white liquid, I think semem.
Makes me giggle when lubricating machine parts.

 

[The Illiterati]

This is terrible but I also see no evidence to believe it.

 

[Tinfoilhatsron]

I mean, it's fucked up, but it's still pretty funny when you think of the ridiculousness of the situation. What responses did you want to see, exactly? 4 pages of "that's terrible!" and nothing else?

I mean it's better than 5 pages of puns and jokes which are fucking garbage. I laughed harder at Reddit. This thread is making wonder tho.

Sorta like Amirox...

I mean some of these posts, yeesh.

 

[Iva Demilcol]

Even if he jizzed directly into their mouths it’s extremely unlikely you could catch anything. We’re talking about something dried on a flute.

This is too graphic for me

 

[DrunkShogun]

Some fucked up shit. Guess I'm going to have to make musical instruments for anyone I know who wants to play music.

 

[Tinfoilhatsron]

It’s not our kids tho. This is a video game forum, not your Nextdoor page. We can be irreverent.

This isn’t some insidious phenomenon lurking in society, jizzing on flutes and giving them to kids. There’s no danger of normalizing some harmful behavior here.

Exactly. I can't identify with the plight of the poor and homeless. I'm not poor or homeless.

/s

 

[Royce McCutcheon]

Semengate 2017

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

Yo some of these posts...

That’s downright disgusting messing with those instruments.

 

[DiipuSurotu]

Come on guys

EDIT: Wait actually, don't.

 

[Transhuman]

Shouldn't be too hard to prove with DNA testing and I hope the culprit gets jail time.

 

[Risible]

Are we dealing with an actual perverted psycho here, or is it just a smear job?

I see what you did there.

 

[Jarrod38]

I can see this being a Law and Order SVU episode now.

 

[paperboywriter]

I always assume music instruments are covered in cum

 

[Aselith]

We had to play recorders during grade 3. One time during the practise sessions, one of the weird kids blew his recorder and all these live maggots flew out. He had been leaving uneaten sandwiches in his school bag.

 

[CountAntonius]

 

[NoblesseOblige]

When you think about it anything could possibly be contaminated with semen.

 

[LookAtMeGo]

When you think about it anything could possibly be contaminated with semen.

I'm pretty sure most washing machines at laundromats are.

 

[Strangelove77]

I bet most of us have tasted semen at some point without knowing. That shit's everywhere.

 

[PeakPointMatrix]

My jaw is on the fucking ground at the first page of responses. Yeah kids possibly tasting some fuck’s semen, real good opportunity to make jokes woo!

What the fuck is wrong with gaf sometimes?!

 

[TheGreatMightyPoo]

Oh, kids involved???
Funny removed.

 

[Woo-Fu]

You'd think it was nuclear waste the way some people are going on in here.

They were probably second-hand flutes to begin with, if you care about where it has been you clean it before trying to improperly play it by deep-throating it.

So yeah, somebody in the supply chain somewhere is definitely a pervert. Sad and funny at the same time.

 

[ISOM]

The need for people to make lame jokes in threads like this is weird.

 

[Orbis]

You'd think it was nuclear waste the way some people are going on in here.

They were probably second-hand flutes to begin with, if you care about where it has been you clean it before trying to improperly play it by deep-throating it.

So yeah, somebody in the supply chain somewhere is definitely a pervert. Sad and funny at the same time.

Why are you trying to brush off a paedophile's targeted attempt at getting his cum in kids' mouths as 'meh, shit happens, just clean it'. What the fuck is going on in this thread.

 

[How About No]

As angered as I am by these disrespectful posts, I think people in here making light of the situation are acting a little bit less badly than the man who may have allegedly given children flutes contaminated with his own semen.

I'm an uncle. To me, this is like some nightmare version of The Pied Piper of Hamlin, but instead of playing a magic flute and taking all the children away never to be seen again, this piper is giving the children flutes laced with his gametes instead.

Ok I worded that poorly. I should say just as bad, but really shitty on our part still

 

[ChainedMaster]

Too soon?

It was premature, yes.

 

[AyaisMUsikWhore]

This thread is sickening to read. This dude put his bodily fluids on instruments that are for kids and the first two pages are about making light of the subject by making corny dick and fluids jokes, like seriously? Wtf light about this shit? Some shit is simply just not funny and is sick as fuck. Disgusting af tbh....Hopefully he gets charged and slapped with sexual offender and paedophile charges because this is just repulsive.

 

[SlipperyFishes]

So Nate's kid knew how semen tasted or how did they find out?

The smell?

 

[Heavy's Sandvich]

Sounds like a soundtrack to an ass whooping.

 

[Business]

I didn’t expect so many puns and jokes on such thread, in this forum.

 

[Aske]

I mean it's better than 5 pages of puns and jokes which are fucking garbage. I laughed harder at Reddit. This thread is making wonder tho.

Sorta like Amirox...

I mean some of these posts, yeesh.

Exactly. If you find the idea of kids playing flutes laced with human semen somehow funny, it's pretty natural that sensible adults will wonder if you also enjoy looking at CP. Amir0x found this kind of thing more than just "funny", he found it "sexual". Hope you're okay with that while you make your unfunny "jokes" that reveal more about you than they do about the teacher's behaviour with his fluid.

 

[Daffy Duck]

fecal matter i could understand, but how does semen get into flutes? truly a mystery.

Someone blew their load

 

[Syf]

Thread is weird as fuck.

 

[jwk94]

Wtf. How does that happen and why?

 

[Scofield94941]

My jaw is on the fucking ground at the first page of responses. Yeah kids possibly tasting some fuck’s semen, real good opportunity to make jokes woo!

What the fuck is wrong with gaf sometimes?!

It just comes down to trying to be funny, what people dont realize is trying to hard to be funny is embarrassing

 

[Mammoth Jones]

You'd think it was nuclear waste the way some people are going on in here.

They were probably second-hand flutes to begin with, if you care about where it has been you clean it before trying to improperly play it by deep-throating it.

So yeah, somebody in the supply chain somewhere is definitely a pervert. Sad and funny at the same time.

You'd laugh if someone contaminated something your child puts in their mouths with sperm? That's amusing to you?

The fuck is wrong with you?

"You should clean it before hand" reads similar to "You shouldn't have worn that skirt". I've never washed something to put in my mouth and said "lemme give this a good cleaning just incase some disgusting freak put their semen all over it".

Exactly. If you find the idea of kids playing flutes laced with human semen somehow funny, it's pretty natural that sensible adults will wonder if you also enjoy looking at CP. Amir0x found this kind of thing more than just "funny", he found it "sexual". Hope you're okay with that while you make your unfunny "jokes" that reveal more about you than they do about the teacher's behaviour with his fluid.

Preach. Something wrong with folks so giddy about this. It's fucking disgusting and normal people don't find it amusing.

"Hahaha children are unknowingly being exposed to a grown man's ejaculate ahahhahahhah" - this is not normal or OK. The fuck....

 

[The Illiterati]

So Friday night a parent walks into a police station with a flute with semen on it. Within two days they've somehow gotten DNA evidence that

A) this semen is from some perverted musical performer
B) this semen is not actually from someone along the chain of contact to the flute or even the person who turned it in
C) this semen is not just a fluke occurance but may be on dozens or hundreds of flutes.....

Actually, none of this is in the article which leads me to believe this is all grade A bullshit on someone's part, and scaremongering of the highest degree. I love that the school district is ending the program with apparently no evidence.

 

[Philly40]

So this thread has existed for about seven hours, is there any confirmation that it actually happened?

I'll be happy to be proven wrong, but everything sounds fake so far.

 

[Johnny Cage In The Shower]

What the fuck is going on here?! How do so many people here not understand how fucked up and unfunny it is to do this to anybody, and especially to children.

Why you gotta come in every thread, be all salty, and get everyone down about things? It's a "news" story, let people interpreted it in however way they wish. If they happen to find some humour in it, so be it! Your "moral high ground policing" is a bit sad... I wonder what doesn't upset you, and even if it is possible to tolerate (have small talk with) you for 2 minutes at a fast food/coffee shop line up.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

Why you gotta come in every thread, be all salty, and get everyone down about things? It's a news story, let people interpreted it in however way they wish. If they happen to find some humour in it, so be it! Your "moral high ground policing" is a bit sad... I wonder what doesn't upset you, and even if it is possible to tolerate (have small talk with) you for 2 minutes at a fast food/coffee shop line up.

Sorry but if you did this in a rape thread or some innocent person being murdered it wouldn't be tolerated. Why is it tolerated for a story about putting sperm on children's music equipment so that it'd get in their mouths?

 

[Orbis]

So this thread has existed for about seven hours, is there any confirmation that it actually happened?

I'll be happy to be proven wrong, but everything sounds fake so far.

Well I mean there's a Federal investigation so I imagine they're assuming it's not fake. Plus the guy was arrested (source). Might need to wait more than 7 hours for a result, hopefully this thread is closed by then.

 

[RustyNails]

I wonder what it's like to go through life without a sense of humour.

Trying to find humor in a story like this however is not particularly warranted. I feel like a bunch of kids were violated without consent. A crime has occured. The fact that the perpetrator found a maybe funny way to do it is not worth giggling about.

 

[Johnny Cage In The Shower]

Sorry but if you did this in a rape thread or some innocent person being murdered it wouldn't be tolerated. Why is it tolerated for a story about putting sperm on children's music equipment so that it'd get in their mouths?

Because it's one of the most absurd news articles to read... Lots of fear mongering and poorly derived conspiracies. I have some real news for you though, if you went out shopping today, touched something on the shelves at wal mart or at starbucks or at the bus stop etc, chances are, you got someone else's semen and fecal matter on yourself. Lab test would absolutely prove this... Don't get me started on hotel rooms.

I am willing to bet this is a hypercondriac parent flipping their lid, fabricating a semen bombed flute conspiracy.