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Gaf, do you text / notify your SO when you leave the house / go somewhere?

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K

Khalifa Jayy

Banned
Is it obsessive, creepy, possessive, normal, expected...?

Ex:.

Text 1 : On my way to the store baby. I love you.

Text 2 : I'm here safely, love.


What do you guys think of this type of communication?
 
Well depends. So they know I'm out of the house and went somewhere sure. It's like a note. Then he can also meet me there after work if he so chooses.

I think it's more weird to keep sending texts like "where are you."
 
I can imagine these people around the dinner table. "So what did you do today-- oh, wait. *crickets*"
 
Fuck no, unless it's something important that's going to interfere with me seeing them later on that day/morning/evening.

I don't need to know where she's at 24/7 nor vice-versa.

It's called trust.

Foundation of a relationship along with communication
 
We live together so of course I tell him where I'm going. I don't have to, I want to.

As for the "I'm here" eh.......not really. No need really. It's all circumstantial.
 
Not usually, but there's nothing wrong with it inherently. If it's something your partner feels like they need, and they're not being possessive or controlling about it, why not check in with them? People have lots of anxieties, and sometimes a little reassurance is helpful.
 
I was gonna say it's wierd, but thinking about it I do it more often than not with my S/O. And if she's not there when I get home I text her to ask where she is. Not to be creepy I just like knowing, I think. It's funny because I'm not jealous or possessive AT ALL but yes I still text.
 
Just if it´s something new/unexpected. I´m not telling i´m going to work each day, but if i go somewhere new, i usually sms i made it safely.
 
If I'm just heading out to run errands or something else relatively boring? Nope, not usually. And even if I'm just casually hanging out around town, it's rare. It mostly comes up if I'm doing something that I think she might want to come along for.

You've gotta have your own space. Otherwise you and your SO kind of become the same person.
 
No, I tell her when I'm leaving since we live together and "see you later" covers everything.

If I'm going to be out later than expected, I'll call or text.

Telling someone about every move you make throughout the day is just weird.
 
I do.
But this is because I'm in a long distance relationship. Also she's Korean so I'd have to do it anyway lest I want to be shivved.

Not too fond of it personally, though.
 
My girlfriend currently lives twenty miles away in the middle of nowhere, so if one of us is leaving the other's house at two am, we text when we arrive home. That's it. Work or school, who gives a crap.
 
Devolution said:
Well depends. So they know I'm out of the house and went somewhere sure. It's like a note. Then he can also meet me there after work if he so chooses.

I think it's more weird to keep sending texts like "where are you."
Click to expand...

Yeah the wife and I let each other know when get somewhere, like the grocery store, becuase maybe we need the other person to get items that were not on the list. Or, when I am on my way home my Wife might ask for me to pick up something to eat for us, or let me know we are out of diapers, etc....

Suckers haha, someone is living with an inflated view of their life.

Oh yeah, and we like each other, so we like to keep in contact...
 
I'm working in the UK right now, from the start of the year. She's still in Italy so yeah, we use to do that as we don't have much time to pass on Skype right now in the evening (I've been on a 11hr a day, 6 days a week work shifts now until September).

It feels absolutely right tbh.
 
Well, we talk pretty often so that stuff slips into the conversation all the time. When I'm leaving from work for example I'm already used to either calling her or getting a call from her so we can catch up on stuff.

We don't live together though.
 
Cotton McKnight said:
Yeah the wife and I let each other know when get somewhere, like the grocery store, becuase maybe we need the other person to get items that were not on the list. Or, when I am on my way home my Wife might ask for me to pick up something to eat for us, or let me know we are out of diapers, etc....

Suckers haha, someone is living with an inflated view of their life.
Click to expand...

I've done this too good point. Going to the store, need anything? Not a big deal.

Also what at "I don't tell them everything what will we talk about later." Plenty of stuff?
 
I usually do this with my parents, thought they're parents so your supposed to do that. I don't text them like that though. I just tell them where I'm going and when I'll be back and that's it. If I'm on vacation or long distances I do have to say that I arrived safely etc.

Texting someone wherever you go and your every move might be a little much for me.
 
Devolution said:
Well depends. So they know I'm out of the house and went somewhere sure. It's like a note. Then he can also meet me there after work if he so chooses.

I think it's more weird to keep sending texts like "where are you."
Click to expand...

Yes.

Annoying: 'Where are you?', '???', 'did you get my last text?', etc.

That goes for everybody, not just SO.

Pretty much the reason why I haven't had a cell phone since the end of last year. If I'm around a computer I can throw a text message through email, and if I'm out and about I can use a pay phone or any business phone to make a quick call.

My social life moves at my pace and I can choose to amp it up if I feel inclined. When I had a phone, I felt like I had too many obligations that I falsely promised. Maybe that has something to do with me other than the phone but it's working.
 
I let my friend know I am leaving the lab, mainly because I leave somewhat later in the evenings and he likes to know I made it home safely.

Edit: Or he'll let me know if he is about to take a nap or something.

Normally those where are you texts are reserved for if he is taking a long road trip and wants to let know when he is leaving/that he got there safely, and the same for me. Common courtesy in those regards.

But, no. It's not a constant. "Going to the store now. Leaving the store. GOing to the bathroom. Peeing. Shaking three times. Washing hands. Leaving bathroom," sort of thing.
 
I text my husband when I'm leaving work or school, but it's usually to coordinate dinner. My school is about an hour away, and some nights I get home late, so texting is useful. However, we text each other updates and little jokes all the time. I'm sure sure some people may use texts as a means of control, but that's not for me.
 
I hate it. The last girl I dated did this through out the day. Before I even had a chance to wake up I had a good morning text, a leaving for work Text, just got to work text. Just got coffee text etc annoying.
 
I tend to keep in regular contact with my boyfriend throughout the day. It's been like that since we first met and it's never gotten annoying. Nor does it make things awkward when we see each other in person or mean we have any less to talk about. But I get that that amount of communication isn't for everyone.

If one of us doesn't answer for hours it's not like we freak out. We just assume we're busy and that's it. The only time I request a text is when he drives back home late at night to know he got there safely. But I do that for everyone - including friends and my sister.
 
I have had a girlfriend break with me over this.
I don't text anyone, and I really, really, like to be alone some times. Just focusing on the things I need to do. I told her I'd be busy and I wouldn't be available because I'd like some alone time. When I contact her again (about a few weeks after), she told me she had a new bf. My reaction was of complete apathy. I do not know why, but it just didn't hit me at all.
This did not sit well with her. I mean I liked her, but I just didn't see the point of reacting to something like that at all. She kept telling me she wanted me to react in some form or another, but I honestly didn't know why. I realised some of us confuse drama for passion. She just didn't believe me when I told her I actually cared about her enough, but didn't see the value of reacting to what she did, if that makes any sense. In the end I kind of felt bad.

Is there something wrong with me? I keep thinking there is.
 
hillsighed said:
I do if I'm going leaving the house and she'll likely be home before I get back. Kinda like a note I guess.
Click to expand...

Yup, same here. We have different days off and if I go to the store and know I will be back before she gets home or vice-versa, there is no need for a text.

Edit: Damn apologies for the double below.
 
kavinsky said:
I have had a girlfriend break with me over this.
I don't text anyone, and I really, really, like to be alone some times. Just focusing on the things I need to do. I told her I'd be busy and I wouldn't be available because I'd like some alone time. When I contact her again (about a few weeks after), she told me she had a new bf. My reaction was of complete apathy. I do not know why, but it just didn't hit me at all.
This did not sit well with her. I mean I liked her, but I just didn't see the point of reacting to something like that at all. She kept telling me she wanted me to react in some form or another, but I honestly didn't know why. I realised some of us confuse drama for passion. She just didn't believe me when I told her I actually cared about her enough, but didn't see the value of reacting to what she did, if that makes any sense. In the end I kind of felt bad.

Is there something wrong with me? I keep thinking there is.
Click to expand...

A few weeks? I'm not going to say something is wrong with you but the issue there does lie with you. I started reading your post expecting it to be a couple hour thing and she was clingy when you were just trying to take a day to relax. In a real relationship though, you can't just go radio silence for weeks at a time, that isn't how they work at all. Like I said, taking a day here and there where you just want alone time is typical and healthy.
 
Add your SO on Find my Friends if you both have iphones.
Best relationship tool ever. Unless you're having an affair lol.

Seriously, it has come in handy so many times for my me and my bf.
 
Yes when I invite her, or when she expects to see me so she knows I won't be available. Otherwise I don't report 24/7
 
civilstrife said:
Add your SO on Find my Friends if you both have iphones.
Best relationship tool ever. Unless you're having an affair lol.

Seriously, it has come in handy so many times for my me and my bf.
Click to expand...

Um, I'm not unfaithful at all but I would just find that to be creepy. I'm assuming thats something that takes advantage of the gps tracker in the phone? No thanks.
 
Let them know where you're going? Why not, it's good to do that in case something happens.

Let them know that you've arrived? Naw man. Too much.
 
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