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How do you handle rumours?

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Okay, my last post was made before reading through all the others so I didn't know about the whole picking a dog up by its leg thing. Now I feel bad for OP. I don't think anything was done to be malicious, and it sounds like a complete accident. I would try to explain to people exactly what happened and make it clear that I feel terrible about it I guess. If they want to hate me still then I'd probably just accept the guilt.
 
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NoblesseOblige said:
Okay, my last post was made before reading through all the others so I didn't know about the whole picking a dog up by its leg thing. Now I feel bad for OP. I don't think anything was done to be malicious, and it sounds like a complete accident. I would try to explain to people exactly what happened and make it clear that I feel terrible about it I guess. If they want to hate me still then I'd probably just accept the guilt.
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Best response of this thread, honestly.

Though if it wasn't your dog and neither you or the owner could afford to "fix" his leg, I would totally not blame the owner for not forgiving you even if you didn't mean it. I'd have a hard time forgiving some one if they were stupid with my pet and the pet had to be put to sleep cause of it. Even if they had good intentions. Unless it was something not so obvious (but sorry, not picking an animal up by its leg isn't that not obvious). Probably better to accept the owner of the dog may never like you (again if htey liked you before). If they do forgive you, well then just be thankful they are a very forgiving person.
 
Ungh, as a dog owner the thought of someone picking up one of my dogs by the legs....

Out of all the ways to be "playful" with a dog how does dangling it upside down/rightside-up become your first course of action?
 
You should probably stop hosting meet ups and keep a low profile. Or move entirely. Also ask to get your gaf name changed, and don't offer to hold any babies. This all makes you look pretty fucked up, and I don't know how you couldn't be aware of that.
 
I don't know why I was expecting anything different to happen. Are these get togethers a workshop on how to kidnap roleplay?

Jokes aside, that is not how rumors work. You killed the dog.
 
"She's making it sound worse than it was. I was playing with the dog and it accidentally got injured. The vet's recommendation was to put it to sleep. Obviously, I feel horrible about it."

Yes, deflect blame by using passive voice and lie by omission that you were abusing the dog (how would you like to get pulled up by your leg) and that there were other options offered by the vet. You're telling your side of the story, so make you look as good as possible.
 
Blutonium said:
Who the fuck picks up a dog by its leg?


Do you pick up babies like this too?
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I pick my kids up by the ankles sometimes. Both, not just one. I also have occasionally picked up my cat by the legs to move it when it was trying to bite/play with me. Now I know I probably shouldn't do that.
 
Well, she's right. Obviously you didn't murder the animal but your careless action resulted in its death. Obviously, you dont feel good about that, and you should tell people that it was a dumb accident and you feel awful about it. But at the same time it sounds like she is using the incident to make an effort to turn people against you.

This doesn't sound like the kind of thing that will just go away, so if explaining yourself doesn't result in any less hostility then maybe it's time to cut out that social circle and meet some new people.

Do you always host your own munch or do you participate in other people's meetups?
 
Wait now we're learning it wasn't even YOUR dog?

Good lord this rabbit hole goes deep. Next we'll find out it wasn't his friends "dog", it was his friends "child".
 
Pai Pai Master said:
Well, she's right. Obviously you didn't murder the animal but your careless action resulted in its death. Obviously, you dont feel good about that, and you should tell people that it was a dumb accident and you feel awful about it. But at the same time it sounds like she is using the incident to make an effort to turn people against you.

This doesn't sound like the kind of thing that will just go away, so if explaining yourself doesn't result in any less hostility then maybe it's time to cut out that social circle and meet some new people.

Do you always host your own munch or do you participate in other people's meetups?
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I guess technically she's not wrong. But she still brings it up, and ignores the fact that I feel awful about it and that it was idiocy on my part. She's mostly using it to turn people against me, I agree. What I did was wrong, but it happened two and a half years ago and this shit is still getting back to me.

Also, when did I say it was a munch? Oh well, anyways... I used to attend lots of munches when I had a car. Now I just host my own and have been since late 2011.
 
Pai Pai Master said:
Well, she's right. Obviously you didn't murder the animal but your careless action resulted in its death. Obviously, you dont feel good about that, and you should tell people that it was a dumb accident and you feel awful about it. But at the same time it sounds like she is using the incident to make an effort to turn people against you.

This doesn't sound like the kind of thing that will just go away, so if explaining yourself doesn't result in any less hostility then maybe it's time to cut out that social circle and meet some new people.

Do you always host your own munch or do you participate in other people's meetups?
Click to expand...

tearsofash said:
I guess technically she's not wrong. But she still brings it up, and ignores the fact that I feel awful about it and that it was idiocy on my part. She's mostly using it to turn people against me, I agree. What I did was wrong, but it happened two and a half years ago and this shit is still getting back to me.

Also, when did I say it was a munch? Oh well, anyways... I used to attend lots of munches when I had a car. Now I just host my own and have been since late 2011.
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Squirrel Killer said:
Post #50.
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Had to google munch and assumed it was a cool lunchtime meetup website name but nope

"munch is a casual social gathering for people involved in or interested in BDSM."
 
It's not a "rumour" if you actually killed the damn dog, or caused the injury that required euthanasia.

It's clear from this and your previous topics that you really, really need help, and I don't think your ex is necessarily wrong for trying to warn people away from you.
 
I'm sort of assuming that the dog-killing bit probably comes as a coda at the end of a bunch of reasons OP's ex dumped him. "And not only all that -- he killed a dog!!".
 
Jesus I would think you're crazy and killed a dog too. Why would you think it was ok to pick up a dog by it's leg?

No amount of explanation is going to help change anyone's mind, especially to people that love animals. The killing the dog thing is true, and no manner of the "whole story" is going to change that. Judging by your complete lack of awareness, I'd say the other half of the rumor isn't far fetched.
 
wesleyshark said:
For sure. Just wasn't expecting that, in total. Figured it had something to do with food at the least haha
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It's mostly about food. All we do is sit around at a particular restaurant, hang out, talk about normal things, and eat.

Not that we don't talk about dirty stuff too, but it's mostly a normal low-key setting.
 
After reading through the thread and what the meetups are is there maybe the possibility she's not doing it to "ruin you", since you yourself said it comes up after people ask about your meetups and maybe it's her way of saying your careless in a unintentional and nonself-aware way that could possibly be a concern with people into BDSM.

Not saying that's the case, not attacking OP just trying to throw out an alternate thought.
 
cr0w said:
It's not a "rumour" if you actually killed the damn dog, or caused the injury that required euthanasia.

It's clear from this and your previous topics that you really, really need help, and I don't think your ex is necessarily wrong for trying to warn people away from you.
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This is how I feel.

I mean, she isn't doing you any favors.
 
I was once pregnant with my friend from school I've heard.

Shit'd on it and didn't care. Possibly originated from my ex or so I've heard.

Rumors'n'shit.
 
See I was expecting a dog attacked you and you were defending yourself

Well... I really hoped you learned the lessons of not lifting animals up by their legs.

In the subject of the 'rumor' I mean it's kinda hard to do anything. She probably won't stop, even if you confront her. If someone asks you point blank you can tell them the truth... though to be honest I don't know how much it'll really help.

Just keep on truckin OP
 
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