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[Riggs]

If ever there was a case where tldr legitimately fits...jesus :lol

I did skim through it and I'll say you have some dedication OP. Those 2 posts are probably longer than all 12k of mine combined.

I really want to read it , but my body will not let me.

 

[GeneralManager]

Weirdo.

 

[Kafel]

that's a lot of work for a shitty company to get a tag

 

[Mdk7]

Wait, are we doing E3 conference fan fiction now?

Seiously, this shit's scary.

 

[MuzzledBasher]

DS sold more than any console ever released

Just out of interest could someone clarify if this is true? I thought PS2 was still the best selling console

 

[herod]

Junior in 3... 2... 1...

 

[BlueTsunami]

I just can't believe someone actually laid back and devoted mental synapses to develop this absolutely trivial fantastical scenario

 

[JordanN]

Just out of interest could someone clarify if this is true? I thought PS2 was still the best selling console

It is.

Although it's only ahead by some 2 million sales...

 

[AdventureRacing]

I don't really want to pile on with the laughing but i am genuinly curious what you expected to gain out of writing/posting this.

 

[marc^o^]

I think it's pretty well written, actually, regardless of how strange of an idea it is.

Thank you! I had fun writing it

 

[Metroid Hunter]

Wh...at?

 

[Ledsen]

what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what
in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what
in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what
in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what
in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what in the what

 

[jetsetfluken]

Now Trine 2 is not the only Director’s cut game that will come out on Wii U. We are very pleased to announce Ninja Gaiden 3, Batman AC and Mass Effect 3 Director Cuts editions will be available at launch. These are enhanced versions of the games some of you have played already. Most of you missed these though, and now is the perfect time to discover it on Wii U.

Assuming the audience are Wii-only users, just like marc^o^.

 

[Shao Kahn Brewing a Stew]

Wait, are we doing E3 conference fan fiction now?

Blame Konami for it.

Spoiler

I'm so glad I missed this year's E3. Wouldn't want to be driven crazy and make my own fan-fictions on how Sony announced several tie-in movies for games, and announced all PSP games playable with Vita with 50% discount if downloaded via Vita.

 

[Mistle]

Whoa!

 

[Pie and Beans]

I don't really want to pile on with the laughing but i am genuinly curious what you expected to gain out of writing/posting this.

I think I like the amazing backfire that he thought that the actual content to show at the Wii U's underwhelming re-unveil was perfect, it was just the presentation that wasn't right and that by presenting it a la Jobs more people would lose their shit and jump aboard the "actually... Wii U is amazing!!!!" hype train.

Its the sort of deluded sense of subtlety that tastes the most ironic when avatar, post history, and everything combined tell a terrible tale that cannot be denied. I also wish ages were mandatorily listed underneath poster's avatars. I feel bad if we're ribbing a teenager but then become worried when its someone in their late twenties and beyond.

 

[Palette Swap]

Is this confirmation that everyone using a Kid Icarus Uprising avatar is mentally unstable and "biased" towards a certain company?

This is way beyond bias territory, we're deep in batshit country.

 

[TheBioLover]

Someone likes Steve Jobs.............

 

[corporate cheerleader]

I don't really want to pile on with the laughing but i am genuinly curious what you expected to gain out of writing/posting this.

A job at Nintendo?

 

[thomasmahler]

Thank you! I had fun writing it

You really didn't, it's just a mashup of the iPhone Keynote with some Nintendo stuff pasted in.

 

[obonicus]

Oh, no!

 

[Nibel]

E3 2012 was so damn bad that people try to think of fan fic scenarios :lol
Incredible!

 

[Metroid Hunter]

This is literally Steve Jobs' 2007 keynote for the iPhone with the Wii U replacing the word "iPhone". LOL

 

[CPS2]

I skimmed through it.


Is this a fanfic?

LOL that's what i was thinking.

 

[Rocket Scientist]

Jezus Christ.... Mother of Mary.... Someone take soundbites from Steve Jobs' presentation and make this happen.

 

[heliconsoul]

Awkwaaaard :-/

 

[canvee]

Lol, this is what happens when you have such a terrible E3.

 

[rdrr gnr]

So, if this were a college paper, you'd be looking at about 4500 words or about 11 pages formatted (12 pt font, Times, double-spaced).

 

[GeneralManager]

Is it bad that I couldn't imagine this coming from anyone but a Nintendo fan?

Don't let them hog the crazy, MS and Sony fans. Who wants to write some fan fiction of Kevin Butler announcing 1000 PSV exclusives or Allard returning to announce the Xbox 720?

Get to it.

 

[revolverjgw]

Do one with Macho Man Randy Savage

 

[Jinfash]

Very good, OP. Now do another version where Krazy Ken introduces it for shits and giggles.

 

[TeegsD]

I mean, good on you for being able to come up with that but holy hell

 

[REMEMBER CITADEL]

but yes i think the reception of it would have been totally different if Jobs presented it.

No shit, a cadaver introducing a new console is not something you see every day.

 

[herod]

Very good, OP. Now do another version where Krazy Ken introduces it for shits and giggles.

no fiction could top the reality

 

[jetsetfluken]

edit: oops

 

[BlueTsunami]

"...and then Shigeru Miyamoto came out in a technicolor Nintendo edition silk kimono and began rubbing the WiiU pad against his genitals. The crowd murmured in surprised but no one dared speak up. A strange platform suddenly begins rising from the center of the stage where two bodies are slowly scissoring. The crowd lets out a gasp as they realize the two contorting bodies belong to Satoru Iwata and Reggie Fils-Aime."

 

[rdrr gnr]

Lol, this is what happens when you have such a terrible E3.

Gamer PTSD

 

[Ricker]

Well one thing is sure,is body is definetly not ready... j/k,j/k

 

[Kunan]

Very good, OP. Now do another version where Krazy Ken introduces it for shits and giggles.

^ this please hahaha

 

[canvee]

Very good, OP. Now do another version where Krazy Ken introduces it for shits and giggles.

Lol, this needs to happen. OP deserves a tag.

 

[SolarPowered]

Read the entire OP and it's sensible. Marc is still kinda scaring me though.

Current day Nintendo really makes it hard for their fans sometimes. I wonder if Snesfreak will snap now. <.<

He wouldn't have, he'd have scrapped it long ago.

Yeah, didn't Steve Jobs find his breathing mask too inelegant to wear? He probably would have been pissed off with the Wii gamepad alone.

You could've gotten a job, earned money and bought a new PC and/or non-Nintendo console in the amount of time it took you to write that up.

More or less what I did.

 

[Kaizer]

Well, this is............something.

 

[Superimposer]

What the fuck

 

[Kaako]

I suggest seeking professional help.

 

[AwakenedCloud]

This is literally Steve Jobs' 2007 keynote for the iPhone with the Wii U replacing the word "iPhone". LOL

Oh my god.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Svo45oepsI0

He even added the pauses.

 

[jetsetfluken]

I forwarded this to Iwata and Reggie.

 

[Ledsen]

This is literally Steve Jobs' 2007 keynote for the iPhone with the Wii U replacing the word "iPhone". LOL

LOL

This is a day I&#8217;ve been looking forward to for two-and-a-half years.[0:26:28]

Every once in a while, a revolutionary product comes along that changes everything. And Apple has been &#8211; well, first of all, one&#8217;s very fortunate if you get to work on just one of these in your career.
Apple&#8217;s been very fortunate. It&#8217;s been able to introduce a few of these into the world.
In 1984, we introduced the Macintosh. It didn&#8217;t just change Apple, it changed the whole computer industry.[0:27:12]
In 2001, we introduced the first iPod, and&#8230; it didn&#8217;t just &#8211; it didn&#8217;t just change the way we all listen to music, it changed the entire music industry. [0:27:36]
Well, today, we&#8217;re introducing three revolutionary products of this class. [0:27:48]

The first one: is a widescreen iPod with touch controls. [0:27:59]
The second: is a revolutionary mobile phone. [0:28:13]
And the third is a breakthrough Internet communications device.[0:28:28]

So, three things: a widescreen iPod with touch controls; a revolutionary mobile phone; and a breakthrough Internet communications device. [0:28:44]
An iPod, a phone, and an Internet communicator. An iPod, a phone &#8230; are you getting it? [0:29:01]
These are not three separate devices, this is one device, and we are calling it iPhone. [0:29:19]
Today, today Apple is going to reinvent the phone, and here it is. [0:29:30]
No, actually here it is, but we&#8217;re gonna leave it there for now. [0:29:41]

 

[Bisnic]

You really had nothing better to do OP?

 

[dallow_bg]

New low for the known fanboy OP.

This is like the guy we had who started the fake Layton blog thing and posted its updates here as if they were clues from Nintendo/Level 5 themselves.

 

[Pie and Beans]

Is it bad that I couldn't imagine this coming from anyone but a Nintendo fan?

Don't let them hog the crazy, MS and Sony fans. Who wants to write some fan fiction of Kevin Butler announcing 1000 PSV exclusives or Allard returning to announce the Xbox 720?

Get to it.

I think the proviso has to be its dead public speakers known for cultural revolution so you've got options like Hitler extolling the virtues of Wünderbook while Martin Luther King Jr would preps an audience for "the promised land of controller free gaming".