Astral Dog
Member
I m sorry 
You did a wonderful job on the house
You did a wonderful job on the house
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I live with the most disgusting person on earth. (Long ass ranting))
- Thread starter joe2187
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oneils
Member
Awful situation. I lived with an ex-gf who suffered from major depression and bulimia for a couple of years. That was stressful as hell.
But, she didn't trash my place.
The only suggestion I have is that if you are going to continue living with your uncle, buy a big shop vac and just go into his room every day and vacuum up all of the piss. Then empty the vac into your toilet or into whatever drain you have on your lot. Then rinse the vac out.
You might have to do that every single day to keep things dry.
You seem to be sticking around with the hopes that you will some day be able to sell the house. But, what if you are not successful in becoming part owner? Do you have a plan for what will happen then?
But, she didn't trash my place.
The only suggestion I have is that if you are going to continue living with your uncle, buy a big shop vac and just go into his room every day and vacuum up all of the piss. Then empty the vac into your toilet or into whatever drain you have on your lot. Then rinse the vac out.
You might have to do that every single day to keep things dry.
You seem to be sticking around with the hopes that you will some day be able to sell the house. But, what if you are not successful in becoming part owner? Do you have a plan for what will happen then?
Some updates:
I dont know what happened but my luck changed abruptly, I dont know how I feel about it though since it started with my uncle nearly cracking his head open while falling down the stairs.
So at the beginning of the month as usual my uncle camps out at the front steps waiting for his SS check, cashed it as soon as he got it, tried to feign that he didn't get his money for about three hours of yelling and screaming before he wads up the money in a ball and throws it at my face for the monthly mortgage payment he owes me, he goes cursing off calling me a selfish greedy bastard and he leaves to spend the rest of his money to buy cocaine and beer.
The next day on July 4th I'm helping my brother set up for the party we allowed him to have with his friends because he did a pretty damn amazing job cleaning the entire house from top to bottom and has been acting like a normal human being. Some of the guests arrive early and I'm cooking at the barbecue while my uncle, high off of cocaine and beer decides to fall down the stairs completely naked, crack his chin open on the bottom step and and proceeds to piss all over himself and roll around in it. I dont know how to react to this as he's completely out of it and incapable of standing on his own two feet anymore. He's mumbling incoherently for a while before I decide to just call an for an ambulance. He refuses to go with them and fights them, starts calling them names and cursing at them and finally gives in after an hour of yelling and screaming at him that they'll just take him to jail instead. They take him and I assume they'll give him some meds and ifx up his chin and he'll be back in two days.
I dont know what happened after the ambulance took him but apparently he said or did something that caused them to put him under a 5150, He's under watch constantly, he can barely walk anymore without assistance and is now seeing hallucinations of flying cars, marching bands in the trees, sharks coming out of the walls, and big flying white horses. I'm baffled by this because he's always been sharp as hell with his mind even when completely shitfaced drunk.
Anyway, I have now been given full power of attorney over him, and I'm trying to discuss some option on what to do with him. I've also managed to finally file my probate claim, although the fee waiver for it wasn't approved right away, hopefully the judge will approve it, if not i dont know where I can come up with the kind of money they're asking for to complete the probate claim.
So...things have gotten better?
I dont know what happened but my luck changed abruptly, I dont know how I feel about it though since it started with my uncle nearly cracking his head open while falling down the stairs.
So at the beginning of the month as usual my uncle camps out at the front steps waiting for his SS check, cashed it as soon as he got it, tried to feign that he didn't get his money for about three hours of yelling and screaming before he wads up the money in a ball and throws it at my face for the monthly mortgage payment he owes me, he goes cursing off calling me a selfish greedy bastard and he leaves to spend the rest of his money to buy cocaine and beer.
The next day on July 4th I'm helping my brother set up for the party we allowed him to have with his friends because he did a pretty damn amazing job cleaning the entire house from top to bottom and has been acting like a normal human being. Some of the guests arrive early and I'm cooking at the barbecue while my uncle, high off of cocaine and beer decides to fall down the stairs completely naked, crack his chin open on the bottom step and and proceeds to piss all over himself and roll around in it. I dont know how to react to this as he's completely out of it and incapable of standing on his own two feet anymore. He's mumbling incoherently for a while before I decide to just call an for an ambulance. He refuses to go with them and fights them, starts calling them names and cursing at them and finally gives in after an hour of yelling and screaming at him that they'll just take him to jail instead. They take him and I assume they'll give him some meds and ifx up his chin and he'll be back in two days.
I dont know what happened after the ambulance took him but apparently he said or did something that caused them to put him under a 5150, He's under watch constantly, he can barely walk anymore without assistance and is now seeing hallucinations of flying cars, marching bands in the trees, sharks coming out of the walls, and big flying white horses. I'm baffled by this because he's always been sharp as hell with his mind even when completely shitfaced drunk.
Anyway, I have now been given full power of attorney over him, and I'm trying to discuss some option on what to do with him. I've also managed to finally file my probate claim, although the fee waiver for it wasn't approved right away, hopefully the judge will approve it, if not i dont know where I can come up with the kind of money they're asking for to complete the probate claim.
So...things have gotten better?
I don't have any kind of advice for you but I can say that I'm happy things are going better for you now, you deserve it.
Liferebooted
Banned
With his social security.
Captain Tuttle
Member
Things are moving in the right direction at least. He must have threatened someone at the hospital. Could his hallucinations be due to the withdrawal?
wastewater
Neo Member
You deserve a medal OP i'm glad things are starting to look up, the house looks great.
Drug dealers like money regardless of where it came from.
I dont know, It could be. Is that normal for alcohol withdrawl?
OfWhiteSkinOnRedLeather
Member
SS comes in mail, check gets cashed. Payee takes cash to his drug dealer and buys cocaine. Pretty easy stuff. About the same way anyone else gets cocaine.
Midnight Moon
Banned
Send his ass away, no need to deal with that shit. Sounds like a mentally unstable child unfortunately.
Joe Shlabotnik
Banned
Yes, the DTs are fucking brutal and possibly fatal, even.
Grimm Fandango
Member
Congratulations I guess. This is some kind of victory.
Hope the house goes well and your uncle gets more help.
Hope the house goes well and your uncle gets more help.
Colonel Mustard
Banned
Really shitty situation all around. You did an amazing job with the house OP. It looks gorgeous.
CarpeDeezNutz
Member
How much money did he have left after he gave you the monthly mortgage payment OP? And it could be DTs giving him hallucinations but I think his dealer probably sold him something other than cocaine. Angel dust maybe.
Your house is beautifully furnished and taken care of amazingly by you, OP. You're the king of patience for putting up with the stuff your uncle does, but something must be done. No human being can live like that and survive.
You've done some great work, though and it's very impressive that it's all by yourself!! Reminds me of Jessee's house from Breaking Bad somewhat lol.
You've done some great work, though and it's very impressive that it's all by yourself!! Reminds me of Jessee's house from Breaking Bad somewhat lol.
Show the judge a print out of this thread and she'll grant you the fee waiver.
You've done good dude.
T
Transhuman
Unconfirmed Member
To be fair, they might actually have bubonic plague.
R
Rösti
Unconfirmed Member
While this doesn't answer what your uncle did to have him put under a 5150, these are the reasons for such:
Source: http://lacdmh.lacounty.gov/Training&Workforce/documents/LPS_Training_Manual_updated.pdf
Overall, things seem to be getting better. Hopefully your uncle will get some kind of evaluation during his stay at... well, wherever he is staying. And that will hopefully lead to some kind of hospitalization or likewise. I can only imagine how hard this must be for you, it's always terrible to see relatives reach a state of grave disregard for the safety and health of themselves as well as others.
As for what you have done to the house, great job!
Particle Physicist
between a quark and a baryon
.
Winterfang
Banned
Beautiful house, can't you just send him to a retirement home or something?
Who knows, he's buying beer constantly and his vision is getting worse every month, sometimes I have to correct him because instead of handing me twenties he ends up giving me a handful of hundreds, so unless I'm with him, i'm pretty sure he's getting taken advantage of whenever he has his money around other people. When I visited him the first day in the hospital he was complaining that the nurses stole $300 (it's county and I believe him)
Well, I think we did contract some minor dysentary last month.
Rösti;69456071 said:While this doesn't answer what your uncle did to have him put under a 5150, these are the reasons for such:
Overall, things seem to be getting better. Hopefully your uncle will get some kind of evaluation during his stay at... well, wherever he is staying. And that will hopefully lead to some kind of hospitalization or likewise. I can only imagine how hard this must be for you, it's always terrible to see relatives reach a state of grave disregard for the safety and health of themselves as well as others.
As for what you have done to the house, great job!
Sounds like those describe the way he's been living for the past 10 years.
Thanks.
He's never without alcohol, no matter how many times we ask the local corner stores to stop selling him alcohol, he somehow comes back with beer and more beer. He doesnt stop, it's like he needs it more than oxygen.
As for the hallucinations, this is the first I've ever seen him talk about seeing things. He hasn't had alcohol for about 6 days straight now and his overall physical and mental condition is getting worse.
Alcohol withdrawal is actually really bad. That could explain some of the hallucinations.
OP you are a trooper. There is no way I could put up with what you put up with. Stronger person than me for sure. I hope you get the eventual happy ending. You deserve some good karma.
OP you are a trooper. There is no way I could put up with what you put up with. Stronger person than me for sure. I hope you get the eventual happy ending. You deserve some good karma.
Joe Shlabotnik
Banned
That is almost certainly delirium tremens, and as I said, it can actually be very dangerous or fatal if untreated. Since you seem to be the nicest person on the entire planet, it's something you should be aware of.
More updates and more shitty times ahead.
Good News: Court date is settled for the 8th, hopefully we can work out modifying the awful horrible no good mortgage loan that's been slowly eating away at my life.
Bad News: Money is shit, as in that there is none to pay court fees, mortgage nearly everything else.
My uncle: A few days ago I was on my way back from a job interview, when I see an ambulance parked outside my house. It seems that the hospital my uncle was staying at judged him fit to come home....even though he couldn't walk, or think clearly, or see clearly for that matter and dump him on my door step with no warning whatsoever. So I literally have to carry him on my back to get him into the house and prop him in the recliner. They give me a pack of adult diapers and some gloves and speed away.
for the next three days I get no sleep. He cannot go up the stairs by himself so we had to bring down the matress and set up a makeshift bed in the room next to my bedroom door. He constantly calls for me to pick him up to go to the bathroom, he's wearing diapers so I help him to the bathroom door and for five minutes he justs stands there over the toilet and then tells me he's done without ever doing anything (he goes in the diaper) the first night the matress was already filled with piss. Also he likes to take off the diapers and throw them in a corner (filled with shit and urine...also this is literally outside my bedroom door now)
He refuses to take the medication he was given unless he's threatened with us calling the police and putting him back in the hospital. The worst is that he'll on occasion to gather up enough strength to slowly shamble his way outside and try and walk down the street to the corner store, it takes him 4 hours to get dressed by himself because we refuse to buy him beer. So as soon as gets up to go outside I have to follow him very slowly to make sure he doesnt fall or kill himself ( this happens 4-5 times a day) He gets to the store and he begs the clerk to sell him beer and I calmly tell them not to as he tries to punch me and push me away to get to the beer fridge.
Then he falls outside the store, begs for anybody passing by to buy him beer and then I physically carry his ass back to the house because he refuses to co-operate, while trying to scream in the streets that I'm kidnapping him and that he'll kill me in my sleep. I had to skip out on two job interviews because I had to take care of him. He was getting a little better to be able to move on his own and taking his medications, but then a friend of his managed to slip him a 40 ounce while I was cooking dinner, he drank it all in nearly a minute and at the end of the day he was complaining of pain and not being able to stand on his own any more and begged to be taken back to the hospital.
fast forward to now, he's currently in a nursing facility and I just had a nice wonderful chat with the five police officers who came to my house today to tell me that I'm being charged with "Kidnapping, Elder Abuse, and Molestation" that he's saying I did while taking care of him for the last week. Luckily I had all my paperwork, my neighbor as a witness to back me up and a call to the psychiatric ward he was in to help me sort it all out. I also learned that he's trying to get me sent to jail by blaming all his ailments, his bleeding ulcers, his falling down the stairs and the general state of his condition on me.
All because I refused to let the stores sell him beer.
Good News: Court date is settled for the 8th, hopefully we can work out modifying the awful horrible no good mortgage loan that's been slowly eating away at my life.
Bad News: Money is shit, as in that there is none to pay court fees, mortgage nearly everything else.
My uncle: A few days ago I was on my way back from a job interview, when I see an ambulance parked outside my house. It seems that the hospital my uncle was staying at judged him fit to come home....even though he couldn't walk, or think clearly, or see clearly for that matter and dump him on my door step with no warning whatsoever. So I literally have to carry him on my back to get him into the house and prop him in the recliner. They give me a pack of adult diapers and some gloves and speed away.
for the next three days I get no sleep. He cannot go up the stairs by himself so we had to bring down the matress and set up a makeshift bed in the room next to my bedroom door. He constantly calls for me to pick him up to go to the bathroom, he's wearing diapers so I help him to the bathroom door and for five minutes he justs stands there over the toilet and then tells me he's done without ever doing anything (he goes in the diaper) the first night the matress was already filled with piss. Also he likes to take off the diapers and throw them in a corner (filled with shit and urine...also this is literally outside my bedroom door now)
He refuses to take the medication he was given unless he's threatened with us calling the police and putting him back in the hospital. The worst is that he'll on occasion to gather up enough strength to slowly shamble his way outside and try and walk down the street to the corner store, it takes him 4 hours to get dressed by himself because we refuse to buy him beer. So as soon as gets up to go outside I have to follow him very slowly to make sure he doesnt fall or kill himself ( this happens 4-5 times a day) He gets to the store and he begs the clerk to sell him beer and I calmly tell them not to as he tries to punch me and push me away to get to the beer fridge.
Then he falls outside the store, begs for anybody passing by to buy him beer and then I physically carry his ass back to the house because he refuses to co-operate, while trying to scream in the streets that I'm kidnapping him and that he'll kill me in my sleep. I had to skip out on two job interviews because I had to take care of him. He was getting a little better to be able to move on his own and taking his medications, but then a friend of his managed to slip him a 40 ounce while I was cooking dinner, he drank it all in nearly a minute and at the end of the day he was complaining of pain and not being able to stand on his own any more and begged to be taken back to the hospital.
fast forward to now, he's currently in a nursing facility and I just had a nice wonderful chat with the five police officers who came to my house today to tell me that I'm being charged with "Kidnapping, Elder Abuse, and Molestation" that he's saying I did while taking care of him for the last week. Luckily I had all my paperwork, my neighbor as a witness to back me up and a call to the psychiatric ward he was in to help me sort it all out. I also learned that he's trying to get me sent to jail by blaming all his ailments, his bleeding ulcers, his falling down the stairs and the general state of his condition on me.
All because I refused to let the stores sell him beer.
User 100115
Banned
Holy crap man.
You also have a bit of a paper trail here in this thread, too, talking about this and documenting it. Best of luck to you, and I hope he gets permanently committed. He needs help that you can't provide.
efyu_lemonardo
May I have a cookie?
oh wow, we were just wondering about you in another thread
edit: fuck, I hope this period of your life is soon behind you and you can move on to more pleasant things.. I have a kid sister who is currently going through a mental breakdown. I lose sleep and school because of her and she does yell and curse and disappear at times, causing us to have to call the police to find her, but she's nowhere near as bad as your uncle..
How is your brother doing? Is he able to help out at all or is this still all on you? I can't imagine going through this much crap on my own...
Is there anything GAF can do in order to help in the meantime? Perhaps we could gather a small donation to help you get through the month, or cover some of your legal fees.
Your strength continues to inspire and amaze me! Even if it doesn't feel that way it does sound like you are making progress! Be strong just a little bit longer man!
edit: fuck, I hope this period of your life is soon behind you and you can move on to more pleasant things.. I have a kid sister who is currently going through a mental breakdown. I lose sleep and school because of her and she does yell and curse and disappear at times, causing us to have to call the police to find her, but she's nowhere near as bad as your uncle..
How is your brother doing? Is he able to help out at all or is this still all on you? I can't imagine going through this much crap on my own...
Is there anything GAF can do in order to help in the meantime? Perhaps we could gather a small donation to help you get through the month, or cover some of your legal fees.
Your strength continues to inspire and amaze me! Even if it doesn't feel that way it does sound like you are making progress! Be strong just a little bit longer man!
TabletopTictacs
Member
I don't know what to say, other than I hope this nightmare ends soon for you.
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
Commit him and then forget about him. For the sake of your sanity.
readLeader
Banned
You know, reading the title of this thread I thought it would be about some dorm room situation. I didn't think anyone who owns a house would destroy it and themselves this willfully.
You're a brave man, OP.
You're a brave man, OP.
This.
I am sorry to say that, but there is a line when altruism crosses into stupidity. Sorry for the harsh words but I feel you so deeply. Don't do this to yourself. You have proven a hundred times you are a really, really, REALLY good guy.
Your uncle needs a professional institution to take care of him. If not for you, then for him. As long as he is with you, once he is better he will be able to get booze somehow. And you are back to square one. Plus he got you charged with criminal offenses. There is a point in life where a person has willfully given up the right to do as they please. Your uncle has.
Jeff Albertson
Member
What a fucking disgrace
You're a saint for putting up with it and not snapping mate
You're a saint for putting up with it and not snapping mate
And after all that you'll still take care of this feces throwing criminal.
With that latest update I would have broken under the strain and killed him and/or skipped the state.
You journeyed from good nephew to doormat a long time ago. No one's going to give you a reward for being a martyr for this guy. You can't get even get time for interviews, you spend all this money on him, I can only imagine there's no time for something like a girlfriend or anything approaching a life of your own. Ditch him anyway you can. He's going to die soon anyway. From his actions he sounds as close as somebody can be to being a literal oxygen thief. Even if your actions ensured he lived longer and healthier there wouldn't be an upside to it.
You journeyed from good nephew to doormat a long time ago. No one's going to give you a reward for being a martyr for this guy. You can't get even get time for interviews, you spend all this money on him, I can only imagine there's no time for something like a girlfriend or anything approaching a life of your own. Ditch him anyway you can. He's going to die soon anyway. From his actions he sounds as close as somebody can be to being a literal oxygen thief. Even if your actions ensured he lived longer and healthier there wouldn't be an upside to it.
akachan ningen
Member
Send him back to where he came from.
I'm not joking around when I say that you are, in fact, guilty of this. I know you didn't push him down the stairs by yourself, but since he's not able to take of himself, you are responsible for him. You are clearly not able to take care of him yourself, though, so keeping at home amounts to abuse.
My brother keeps as far away from him and his problems as far as possible. They dont have good history with eachother and would likely just be trouble. He ignores him completely.
The money situation is a whole other issue, I've been out of work for a good four months (I get on call catering jobs on occasion but they dont pay enough and arent stable enough salary for what I'm dealing with) now and since the whole mortgage situation, raising rates, loss of insurance, escrow, court fees, taking care of my uncle, the loan against my truck, we're nearly close to 5-6 months behind, which is way too much by now for any donations I could ask for to cover. I had to leave school early without my degree because I had to get a second job to help keep the house.
I've been in talks with the hardest hit/obama foundation, but it's another paperwork nightmare that has me going in circles, I need the court to finalize the probate paperwork, but I cant pay the fees, I cant pay the fees because I've been scraping every penny to pay off some of the last months mortgage payment and round and round.
I believe my only option left if the court stuff doesnt work out is to just sell the house as soon as possible as is, use it to pay off the loan and leave. The problem is my uncle will get half the money and who knows what the fuck kind of shit that will cause.
Nope, apparently even though he's incapable of taking care of himself of his own ability, and he's sane enough (even though he still sees halucinations) to know his name and the date, he can verbally revoke my power of attorney.
I mentioned that the hospital dropped him off at my doorstep with no prior warning, and nothing other than some diapers and his prescriptions...what the fuck was I supposed to do?
Not much you could in that immediate situation.
You have one job right now: getting power of attorney, and then using it to sell your family's house. None of you are in any position to pay for it right now, and it's better to sell it yourself than let the bank take it from you and sell it for you.
After that, you can think about taking care of your uncle, although from the sound of it, he doesn't want to be helped, and there might not be much you can do. You're obviously a good-hearted person, though, so you might be able to think of something.
Well, apparently he doesn't want to abandon him, but he isn't really doing anything to help him. Do you have any bright ideas?
I'm really not knowledgeable with situations like this but you really must get rid of him somehow.
You're not being a hero here. As someone said, you won't get a reward. You'll live a shitty unhappy life until either of you pass away. That's not something you want. Who knows what you'll do under all that pressure for so long. You have nothing to prove and this is your life. Take control and move on.
You're not being a hero here. As someone said, you won't get a reward. You'll live a shitty unhappy life until either of you pass away. That's not something you want. Who knows what you'll do under all that pressure for so long. You have nothing to prove and this is your life. Take control and move on.
FutureZombie
Banned
Ewwwww Budweiser.
B For Bendetta
Member
Anyone else get a little scared when roommate topics pop up and you are unsure if your roommate is a gaffer and the topic is about you? Dodged another bullet. Time to do some dishes
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