• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

In your experience, do "nice guys" really finish last?

Status
Not open for further replies.
M

Majestad

Banned
I was wondering what GAF thinks, specially female-GAF. From your experience and from what you've seen, is it true that the "nice guys" finish last when it comes to love and relationships?

Share thoughts!

I think it depends on how you define nice. If it is a guy who thinks showering a girl with compliments and gifts is the best way to win her heart, then you are done. If you are the type of "nice guy" who's confident, well-mannered and romantic, then the chance of success is pretty high.
 
I suppose I'd be considered a "nice guy" and I am definitely not finishing last. Except in bed. It's just good manners.
 
Immortal_Daemon said:
From experience, I have way more luck with girls if I pretend I'm not even remotely interested in them.

Does that count as being a mean guy?
Click to expand...

Just playing hard to get and someone who shows self-worth, which is dead sexy to anyone.

In my experience, "boring guys" finish way behind "nice guys"
 
Doormats and faux gentlemen/ladies finish last.

It's totally possible to be kind and courteous, while still standing up for yourself and being genuine.
 
All the relationships I've been in have because I've been a nice guy. The difference is that most "nice guys" on the internet don't show their true intentions. I ask to go on dates.

I think the internet stereotype "nice guy" is some dude who never asks some crush he has on a date, thus never showing his romantic intentions, and then complains about the friendzone. They'd save themselves a lot of heart-ache by going out to dinner or something before they get themselves too attached.

EDIT: The guy in Fiction's post seems to do a good job of explaining it.
 
I'm not a female, but in my experience with guys "nice guys" do tend to finish last...because "nice guy" usually ends up meaning "doormat" and nobody finds that attractive.
 
No, but for what it's worth I don't think being not genuinely nice has a significant effect on how you succeed in something a lot of the time.

Oh, those "nice guys" who wear fedoras or whatever obviously do finish last because they're......just dumb. But I mean that should be pretty obvious.
 
Yes.

Yes.

9 out of 10 doctors agree that yes...oh no wait the last one didn't understand the question. 10 out of 10 doctors agree that yes they do.
 
A mature, confident, and gentlemanly man will definitely do well with women.

The problem is that most "nice" guys are have no backbone, no conviction-they seek to overly please to point of manipulation--and women see right through this. So they rarely get ahead romantically.

You can play the aloof bad boy, but you'll only attract women with issues. Quality women, meaning a women who is secure and confident herself, don't stick with disrespect for long.

However, everyone, not just women, respects honesty and sticking to your convictions and opinions. No one respect someone who tries to always be agreeable to curry favor and approval. People see right through this manipulation and it's a turn off.

Moreover, a lot of nice guys do favors not out of sincerity but because they want something in return. It's not genuine and women can see right through this.

People like people who are genuine not those who do things because they have an agenda. Such as I deserve your time because I bought you a drink. which is a common "nice guy'' tactic.
 
In my personal experience, when I act nice "you look nice today", well mannered, polite, it never works out for me.

When I started university, I changed it up. I acted more like a jerk. Kinda condescending, didn't give compliments. Stratled the line between self confidence and playful jerkiness.

This worked out infinitely better. I had hot girls that wanted to be around me. I actually had 2 girls who were constantly trying to beat the other on who sat next to me.

So in my experience so far, nice guys finish last. Never going back to that bullshit again.
 
I remember a great post here in a thread about pro tips for life which said "nice guys don't finish last, weak guys do; so be nice but be strong". Paraphrased but that's what I believe. You don't need to fuck other people over to get shit done, you need to be strong enough to fight against those who would.
 
It seems like a lot of the dudes who say shit like "nice guys finish last" are just upset that the girls they are infatuated with don't find them attractive in any way.
 
No. Guys with no confidence, nothing to offer, and little to say finish last. They started calling themselves nice guys for some reason.

All that unused curm is clouding their minds.
 
Around 17 I was still looking for a girl who has never had a boyfriend. Then I realized with some shock that there actually aren't any virgin girls my age. By the time I left school, I was already MGTOW. I was angry realizing that at school the girls slept with all the popular jocks and had no interest whatsoever in decent, intellectual guys like myself and once I'm highly educated and successful and the jocks are all useless wastes of space, they'll be all over me. As someone who is firmly against rewarding bad behaviour, I decided that no way in hell is that going to happen. You didn't want me then, you can't have me now. More than ten years later and I'm still sticking with it.
 
Actual

Or

I am nice ( not really nice ) guys

The former, most dudes in relationships i know are some of the nicest dudes I know, you wanna know what attracts mates. Kindness and understanding. " but this person doesn't accept my kindness and understanding" find a better person who does.

The latter, yes.
 
In the adult world, many women can become addicted to a man who really understands them emotionally. I think that's part of the Nice Guy toolkit.
 
Guys who "respect women too much to ask them out" will always finish last. Rejection is a part of life, so you have to sack up and ask girls on real dates. Making your intentions known early can actually strengthen a friendship if it doesn't work out, because at least then you guys will be on the same page.

One the other side of the coin, girls who lament that they "never meet nice guys" are often disingenuous (to cover the fact that they actually enjoy casual relationships that don't go anywhere) or simply aren't looking hard enough. It's not hard to avoid multiple assholes. Like, in a row.

Fake edit: That's a pretty good video by Fiction.
 
Stupid women like terrible men, stupid men like terrible women. I just stay away from people in general nowadays.
 
It's just confidence, strength and conviction. You can be nice and have those traits, but most men have to trick themselves in to that state of mind anyway. Very few just have it. Being fun and entertaining goes a long way I think. Fat stacks are also never detrimental.
 
Still waiting so I'll get back to you. Man I can't wait until the day a hot girl will fuck me because of how nice I am to her.
 
Many nice guys find loving partners and stay in healthy, monogamous relationships for 50+ years. Some nice guys end up broken people because life is difficult and often unfair. In general, nice guys do pretty well.
 
The problem is not being nice. Being nice is an excellent quality to have. But guys have a bad habit of thinking that if you're nice to the point that you're willing to become a doormat, and that if you do enough nice things for a girl, then the girl is obligated to like you. She isn't. So be a nice person but don't think that being overly nice is the only factor in whether or not a girl likes you.

And don't be nice just so that you can get a girl to go out with you. That's not true nice. That's nice that's been corrupted to fulfill an ulterior motive.
 
jasonng said:
Still waiting so I'll get back to you. Man I can't wait until the day a hot girl will fuck me because of how nice I am to her.
Click to expand...

In certain contexts, all you need to do is to be overly generous with the contents of your wallet...

My personal experiences are of course anecdotal, biased. I've seen nice guys shat on for being caring, compassionate. Not necessarily the most interesting folks, but neither were the guys the poor fucks were rejected for. They were just more inclined to fake it. And yes, I've seen it happen to nice women. The only woman I've ever (then) had feelings for, told me with her actions that she'd rather be with someone we both knew, who'd throw constant childish fits, puff himself up with never a thing to evidence it, and didn't even look at her when he spoke to her (usually the eyes were pointed at another female in the room). She was an idiot, so was I for falling for her.

I've also had co-workers who seemed to worship the shittier men in our mutually shared lives- guys who'd talk about how much they loved their girlfriends, but bragged to me about how often they'd cheat on them. Even mentioned which women they'd physically harm or worse (*insert Always Sunny reference*) for slighting them at a previous point in time. So, everyone sucks, long live Saoirse Ronan and other similar blonde goddesses.
 
Majestad said:
I was wondering what GAF thinks, specially female-GAF. From your experience and from what you've seen, is it true that the "nice guys" finish last when it comes to love and relationships?

Share thoughts!

I think it depends on how you define nice. If it is a guy who thinks showering a girl with compliments and gifts is the best way to win her heart, then you are done. If you are the type of "nice guy" who's confident, well-mannered and romantic, then the chance of success is pretty high.
Click to expand...

This is exactly it.

A "nice guy" is one who puts women on a pedestal and worships them, lacks confidence, and always makes sacrifices on himself to please the woman. This ultimately ends in failure.

But the "correct nice guy" to be is the one that's confident, respects women, but also has his own opinion and values, and doesn't throw his own life out the window for a girl.

I used to be the 1st kind of nice guy. The one that did nothing but try to please the woman and my relationships always went the same way. It started with the girl saying "ohh you treat me better than anyone ever has!" and then months later they realized I had no backbone and if they said jump I'd say how high.

Now, I gained confidence, my own goals in life, but yet I respect women and treat them well. I now have a very successful relationship with the girl I believe I'm going to marry. And it's because I evolved from the nice guy into the proper nice guy lol.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

What apps do you use on your PC to enhance the user experience?
31
1K
violence replied
Will GRR Martin finish the books?
Opinion  2
69
2K
Brazen replied
I just had a magical experience in the bathroom.
27
581
poppabk replied
I really miss Brent Hinds
5
219
RavenSan replied
Guys, which comics do you read? Manga aside!
2
72
2K
L*][*N*K replied
Top Bottom