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[Chuckie]

A priest molested a child.

Well, I guess all christans are pedophiles.

Another example:

A christan says the deval made the dinosaur bones to deceive us.

Well, I guess all christans are complete idiots.

Who in this thread said: All muslims are phallic shaped food hating devils?

Everybody seems to be just making fun of the guy who came with the ban.
Stop being so sensitive and go eat a nice big hard banana.

 

[akira28]

Some crazy muslim preacher made up a crazy rule somewhere. The only problem is how Islam can sometimes take these fatwas and spread them like wildfire if they get popular.

I almost want to think this guy is being subversive or satirical, but that's probably me being way over-optimistic.

 

[Finaika]

Can they touch dildos though?

 

[Funky Papa]

Isn't he implying that from now on only muslim men will be allowed to pick up the groceries?

Backfire?

 

[stilgar]

Can they touch dildos though?

If not shaped like radish, watermelon or cramberries.

 

[SmokyDave]

Don't be so hard on yourself, man.

I begrudgingly doff my hat to you sir

 

[Log4Girlz]

A priest molested a child.

Well, I guess all christans are pedophiles.

Another example:

A christan says the deval made the dinosaur bones to deceive us.

Well, I guess all christans are complete idiots.

Not all religious people are stupid, but all religion is inherently stupid.

 

[DeathIsTheEnd]

Not all religious people are stupid, but all religion is inherently stupid.

Even if this were a religion?

 

[Log4Girlz]

Even if this were a religion?

Now there's a revelation I can get behind.

 

[fawaz]

Not all religious people are stupid, but all religion is inherently stupid.

Well I guess the one billion muslims and billions of other riligious people are all idiots, and you have out smarted them all.

 

[fawaz]

Who in this thread said: All muslims are phallic shaped food hating devils?

Everybody seems to be just making fun of the guy who came with the ban.
Stop being so sensitive and go eat a nice big hard banana.

A banana does sound nice right now.

 

[The Technomancer]

Well I guess the one billion muslims and billions of other riligious people are all idiots, and you have out smarted them all.

Okay, not going to comment one way or the other on the actual content of the quote (yet) but....you do realize that you just completely contradicted him right? I mean, he literally said "religion is stupid but not all religious people are stupid" and you countered with "so you're saying all religious people are stupid!?"

 

[Melchiah]

"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."

 

[Akuun]

This is about as fucking retarded as those femnazis saying missiles and airplanes are phallic.

 

[Angry Fork]

A priest molested a child.

Well, I guess all christans are pedophiles.

Another example:

A christan says the deval made the dinosaur bones to deceive us.

Well, I guess all christans are complete idiots.

I won't go as far to say all Christians are idiots, but there is a part of their brain that seems to go dormant when it comes to religion. They can be absolutely normal, logical, critical thinkers in every other aspect of their life, except religion. It's really frustrating.

 

[Mr. B Natural]

"Somepenis a cigar is just a cigar."

I agree

 

[richiek]

What if they are uncut? Are those like super non-halal?

You know, the word for "chili pepper" in Korean is also slang for "penis".

 

[Rentahamster]

 

[aronnov reborn]

where they suppose to get their fucking potassium?

 

[Henchmen21]

Sharp-eyed viewers will note this is the 2nd cock-shaped veggie I have posted today.

Is this just a round about way of saying you have a veggie shaped cock?

SO HELP ME GOD IF IT'S A TURNIP!!!!

You know, the word for "chili pepper" in Korean is also slang for "penis".

Is is the same as "Joanie Loves Chachi"?

 

[tapedeck]

I was this close to posting a bunch of gifs of Roselyn Sanchez going down on a banana but yeah NSFW.

 

[Slurpy2k20]

"CAIRO: An Islamic cleric residing in Europe said that women should not be close to bananas or cucumbers, in order to avoid any “sexual thoughts.”

The unnamed sheikh, who was featured in an article on el-Senousa news, was quoted saying that if women wish to eat these food items, a third party, preferably a male related to them such as their a father or husband, should cut the items into small pieces and serve.

He said that these fruits and vegetables “resemble the male penis” and hence could arouse women or “make them think of sex.”

He also added carrots and zucchini to the list of forbidden foods for women.

The sheikh was asked how to “control” women when they are out shopping for groceries and if holding these items at the market would be bad for them. The cleric answered saying this matter is between them and God.

Answering another question about what to do if women in the family like these foods, the sheikh advised the interviewer to take the food and cut it for them in a hidden place so they cannot see it.

The opinion has stirred a storm of irony and denouncement among Muslims online, with hundreds of comments mocking the cleric.

One reader said that these religious “leaders” give Islam “a bad name” and another commented said that he is a “retarded” person and he must quite his post immediately.

Others called him a seeker of fame, but no official responses from renowned Islamic scholars have been published on the statements."

No need to bold, its worth the read.

I like that the cleric thought this through and listed all the phallic shaped veggies he could think of.

Also, would have loved to see the face of the journalists interviewing him and keeping a straight face.

Source

Fucking hilarious. And before anyone starts, this is probably the only 'cleric' in the world that believes the above. Don't make this out to be more than 1 guy saying stupid shit.
Cue right wing blogs having a field day/week with this and pretending that this guy represents some popular opinion.

 

[Melchiah]

Another example:

A christan says the deval made the dinosaur bones to deceive us.

Well, I guess all christans are complete idiots.

No, all creationists are idiots.


EDIT: Another bannable food item, potato.

 

[Orayn]

No, all creationists are idiots.


EDIT: Another bannable food item, potato.

But some of them have degrees! Surely no one can go through post-secondary education and remain so willfully ignorant?

 

[Patrick Bateman]

Damn, those guys better don't browse FTV.

 

[.GqueB.]

Bwaaahahahahahahahah.

 

[Henchmen21]

So all these cock shaped veg, is it proof God has the sense of humor of a college frat boy?

 

[Kad5]

This is why I trust my own judgment over some random cleric I have no affiliation with.

Of course i'm different than most Muslims I would say. I'm very liberal.

 

[Log4Girlz]

Well I guess the one billion muslims and billions of other riligious people are all idiots, and you have out smarted them all.

Bravo sir, Bravo.

 

[ghostofsparta]

You know, the word for "chili pepper" in Korean is also slang for "penis".

Same in Mexico.

 

[Count Dookkake]

Well I guess the one billion muslims and billions of other riligious people are all idiots, and you have out smarted them all.

Nice.