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[Caipirinha]

http://mojoupgrade.com

In case it's new to you (was to me until today), it's a site that allows a couple two complete a sexual fantasies questionnaire separately and then allows them to see together what they both want to try.

I'm (late 20s guy) basically a sex addicted freak whereas she at least claims to be very vanilla, but I am convinced girls hide a lot of their fantasies, even to themselves, and that overtime they seem to become more comfortable sharing them... At least that's what I have figured based on some personal, er, research.

Anyway I wouldn't say our sex life was bad or boring but sex is like the pinnacle of life for me and I have a huge bucket list. So I am hoping that this will lead to some exciting adventures but at the same time I have a feeing that it will just confirm she is as vanilla as I suspected...

Have any of you guys (or girls) tried this site and had any good results from it?

 

[ClosingADoor]

This seems weird. Why can't you just talk about this with your girlfriend?

 

[Mitch]

You could actually talk to her about it face to face instead of throwing some weird questionnaire in front of her.

 

[Corpekata]

This seems weird. Why can't you just talk about this with your girlfriend?

I think the idea is that what you both don't agree on is never said so if you want your SO dress up like Hefer from Rocko's Modern Life but aren't ready to tell them, then just the more commonplace requests like "threesome" will be part of the conversation.

 

[The Jackdog]

You could actually talk to her about it face to face instead of throwing some weird questionnaire in front of her.

this. stop being weird and communicate

 

[trifelife]

Yup. This should go well.

 

[ItIsOkBro]

You could actually talk to her about it face to face instead of throwing some weird questionnaire in front of her.

I know GAF likes to ride the 'just communicate' wave all the way but really I don't see a problem with someone keeping the weird shit in the dark recesses of your mind a secret until you know it might be mutual.

 

[danowat]

Yup. This should go well.

After reading the fantasies on the questionnaire, yeah, I agree, this can't back fire, at all.

 

[Keri]

Oh get off your high horses. The idea of the questionnaire is to make it easier to talk to your significant other about sexual fantasies, because you only talk about what you have in common, which has the added benefit of avoiding a scenario where one feels pressured to try something they dislike.

OP, I've never tried it, but it sounds like an interesting and fun thing to do, so I hope it really opens up a good discussion for you and your girlfriend.

 

[The Jackdog]

I know GAF likes to ride the 'just communicate' wave all the way but really I don't see a problem with keeping the weird shit in the dark recesses of your mind a secret until you know it might be mutual.

unless its a young relationship, i agree.

been dating for a few years? You should know the weird shit in the back of eachothers minds.

a relationship is the space between two people. gotsta communicate

 

[Kurdel]

This seems weird. Why can't you just talk about this with your girlfriend?

No, this is how millenials do things now.

 

[Tenebrous]

Anyone wanna be my partner & fill this out?

 

[danowat]

OP, I've never tried it, but it sounds like an interesting and fun thing to do, so I hope it really opens up a good discussion for you and your girlfriend.

Yeah, until OP says he wants to anally fist his partner while pointing a gun at her.

 

[Starviper]

Anyone wanna be my partner & fill this out?

a/s/l?

And yeah, just talk to your partner.. It shouldn't be a problem to explore new things if you're open with each other.

 

[Caipirinha]

Yeah, until OP says he wants to anally fist his partner while holding a gun at her.

Exactly, not really sure if these guys are just pedalling some personal philosophy and not thinking about the reality or if they really are that naive about relationships.

I have had relationships with girls that are very sexually open and down for whatever, this is not one of those relationships.

 

[kitschykitty]

I did this with a girlfriend years ago, it worked out well, learned a lot.

 

[Caipirinha]

I did this with a girlfriend years ago, it worked out well, learned a lot.

Any surprises? Like things that you didn't expect her to be into but she was?

*cough* "would like to watch him have sex with another girl" *cough*

 

[FyreWulff]

It's always just been easier to talk about it in person...

 

[danowat]

I did this with a girlfriend years ago, it worked out well, learned a lot.

I dunno, I mean I am happy that it worked for you, but the trouble is with doing it like this is you can't start gently and judge the reaction and go from there like you can in person.

It's just, wham, all fantasies on the form, and send, it's very easy to drop a clanger that way!.

 

[Caipirinha]

I dunno, I mean I am happy that it worked for you, but the trouble is with doing it like this is you can't start gently and judge the reaction and go from there like you can in person.

It's just, wham, all fantasies on the form, and send, it's very easy to drop a clanger that way!.

The only fanasies you can see are the ones your partner also shares. If you happen to want to eg. role play rape her it shouldn't be too much of a "clanger" if it turns out she wants the same?

 

[kitschykitty]

Any surprises? Like things that you didn't expect her to be into but she was?

*cough* "would like to watch him have sex with another girl" *cough*

Yeah lots of surprises but no I at least didn't select that one, who knows if she did.

I dunno, I mean I am happy that it worked for you, but the trouble is with doing it like this is you can't start gently and judge the reaction and go from there like you can in person.

It's just, wham, all fantasies on the form, and send, it's very easy to drop a clanger that way!.

We did it beside each other privately, we read the final thing together and talked about it, but I'm not going to go into more detail.

 

[danowat]

The only fanasies you can see are the ones your partner also shares. If you happen to want to eg. role play rape her it shouldn't be too much of a "clanger" if it turns out she wants the same?

Ahhh, I didn't realise that, so it own shows co-existing fantasies then? fill ya boots OP if that's the case!

 

[FyreWulff]

also, there's stuff you'd rather try after building more of a foundation in your relationship, and other stuff you can discover on the fly in the bedroom.

 

[ramparter]

ITS A TRAP!!!!!!!!!!!

She may tick all the weird stuff just to see what you chose, then tell you "wtf, did you actually wanted me to do that????"

 

[Caipirinha]

Yeah lots of surprises but no I at least didn't select that one, who knows if she did.

I'm just hoping for some surprises basically, surprises are very sexy. I am pretty open to anything so there wasn't much I didn't answer with "if my partner is interested" so it will be fun if there are some things she felt shy to tell me about that I can help her explore.

ITS A TRAP!!!!!!!!!!!

She may tick all the weird stuff just to see what you chose, then tell you "wtf, did you actually wanted me to do that????"

Thought about this but decided it would be a consolation prize for her to know these things and let it sink in without me having to stand in front of her and tell her that I want to £&^% her @(*&^ and %^&* @£$% her %^&*@ with her %$£& (^%$.

 

[BossLackey]

ITS A TRAP!!!!!!!!!!!

She may tick all the weird stuff just to see what you chose, then tell you "wtf, did you actually wanted me to do that????"

Yeah, this is a possibility

 

[MrGerbils]

I know GAF likes to ride the 'just communicate' wave all the way but really I don't see a problem with someone keeping the weird shit in the dark recesses of your mind a secret until you know it might be mutual.

Agreed. This seems like a perfectly fine way to begin communication if both partners are interested in filling it out. In a way I think it's kinda cute. *shrug*

It's not like you fill this out and then stop. You fill it out and then talk about what you have in common. That's communication.

 

[whatsinaname]

I don't see how this can go wrong.

(Someone is going to check every fantasy and send it to their partner).

 

[BlueTsunami]

Water sports Y/N

 

[Caipirinha]

Ahhh, I didn't realise that, so it own shows co-existing fantasies then? fill ya boots OP if that's the case!

They are well and truly filled to the brim haha, now to give em a shake and see what's left inside!

 

[Caipirinha]

Yeah, this is a possibility

I'm pretty confident in mutually assured destruction here, she will probably be as terrified of discovering that I want to do something she hates as vice versa lmao.

You can be sure I clicked "no" on inviting multiple men into the bedroom pretty quickly.

 

[d9b]

No chance this is going to backfire. Not at all.

 

[Slayven]

Just breakup

 

[Caipirinha]

Water sports Y/N

Peeing on: yes!! (two exclamation marks)
Being peed on: depends on her

The wait begins.

 

[Akuun]

Did you talk to her about this before sending it to her?

I think questionnaires like this are fine if you both agree to do them, but sending it to her out of the blue will be very weird.

And yes, this is definitely done on the honor system. It's perfectly possible for one person to check "yes" to everything to see what the other person is into without revealing anything about themselves.

 

[Apathy]

ITS A TRAP!!!!!!!!!!!

She may tick all the weird stuff just to see what you chose, then tell you "wtf, did you actually wanted me to do that????"

Yeah one person says yes to everything while the second person is actually taking the questionnaire properly and the first person can see all the stuff the second person actually wants.

 

[Caipirinha]

Yeah one person says yes to everything while the second person is actually taking the questionnaire properly and the first person can see all the stuff the second person actually wants.

Mutually assured destruction will protect me I am sure of it.

 

[BamfMeat]

Peeing on: yes!! (two exclamation marks)
Being peed on: depends on her

The wait begins.

Wait, how does it depend on her? Either you want to be peed on or you don't!

 

[Caipirinha]

Wait, how does it depend on her? Either you want to be peed on or you don't!

I'm not particularly interested in dressing up as a lumberjack but if it would turn her into a horny sex beast then I sure as shit am extremely interested in dressing up as a lumberjack.

 

[internetwolf]

OP learn to communitate with your girl

 

[SillyEskimo]

I filled out a sub questionnaire for a dominatrix once in my early 20's that was 350 questions long. I learned a lot about myself, that's for sure. Many of the questions really made me think about my sexual quirks in new and different ways. It also helped confirm many desires that I was previously on the fence about.

 

[TUSR]

The only fanasies you can see are the ones your partner also shares. If you happen to want to eg. role play rape her it shouldn't be too much of a "clanger" if it turns out she wants the same?

bruh

 

[Sai-kun]

im doing this right now let's see how it goes

edit: that went well. learned a few things! thanks for the link, op!

 

[The Elite]

Great way to let me girlfriend know that I want her to dress up in a dragon outfit.

 

[Apathy]

Great way to let me girlfriend know that I want her to dress up in a dragon outfit.

That has to come from the heart not a questionnaire. Bro do you even breath fire and kidnap fair maidens?

 

[Koriandrr]

This seems weird. Why can't you just talk about this with your girlfriend?

because women don't like talking about it. Just saying it out loud in detail takes the pleasure out of it. At least that's what I've noticed from my experience. I know it's a bit of a shitty 'mind read game' most of the times, but just having the guy guess what you're into and surprise you (pleasantly, not in a weird way) can go a veeery long way and gives us a lot more pleasure. Of course there's the risk this can go terribly wrong, but better try than not.

I would agree that most girls who claim they're 'vanilla' when asked would be into a lot more stuff, but there's the exceptions too. There are some pretty vanilla girls out there, I have a friend who honestly believed that doing it doggy style is something super dirty and not something everyone does.

 

[Caipirinha]

OP learn to communitate with your girl

because women don't like talking about it. Just saying it out loud in detail takes the pleasure out of it. At least that's what I've noticed from my experience. I know it's a bit of a shitty 'mind read game' most of the times, but just having the guy guess what you're into and surprise you (pleasantly, not in a weird way) can go a veeery long way and gives us a lot more pleasure. Of course there's the risk this can go terribly wrong, but better try than not.

I would agree that most girls who claim they're 'vanilla' when asked would be into a lot more stuff, but there's the exceptions too. There are some pretty vanilla girls out there, I have a friend who honestly believed that doing it doggy style is something super dirty and not something everyone does.

I have a feeling that those girls go absolutely off the wall freakozoid in their middle age. Just a theory.

 

[CyclopsRock]

Oh get off your high horses. The idea of the questionnaire is to make it easier to talk to your significant other about sexual fantasies, because you only talk about what you have in common, which has the added benefit of avoiding a scenario where one feels pressured to try something they dislike.

This. This questionnaire is not intended to replace communication, it's to ensure that you can raise your interests without the other person potentially feeling a) disgusted or b) pressured by what you say you want.

 

[Dr.Acula]

So there's a website you upload all your dark sexual fantasies to?

Call me paranoid, but this just strikes me as blackmail.com.

 

[Caipirinha]

This. This questionnaire is not intended to replace communication, it's to ensure that you can raise your interests without the other person potentially feeling a) disgusted or b) pressured by what you say you want.

I wouldn't take those comments seriously, I think it might be a stock answer of theirs for all relationship threads that they think will show they are somehow more mature or romantically adept than everyone else. I don't think they actually thought about the specifics of the thread.

eg.
> Reads thread title "Guys I have an issue with my gf "
> Doesn't read the OP
> Immediately replies with "smh OP you need to communicate with her srsly"
> Rubs hands, "another day teaching these kids about relationships, god I'm amazing"