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Off-Topic Personality Mental Health |AT| GAF

Melon

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Welcome to Mental Health GAF

Firstly, I'd like to add some ground rules for this thread in order to maintain and preserve a safe and welcoming space. Yeah, yeah, I know, I used safe space unironically, tee-hee.

1. Be respectful - This should go without saying, but please be respectful to your fellow members and what they are going through. Just because you personally do not relate to someone's situation does not mean you get the right to belittle what they are going through.

2. Do not give out personal information - Yes, this is for discussing personal issues, specifically mental health issues, but giving out (traceable) personal information about yourself or those involved with you is discouraged. This site is very much public, and although we are here for you, not everyone is. Just be safe and act responsibly.

3. Do not self-diagnosis- Self-diagnosing, whether on yourself or others, is a very harmful, sometimes dangerous, practice that is rarely ever accurate. It does far more damage than good. Researching symptoms you are experiencing is one thing, but do not claim, "Google told me I have schizophrenia because I get sad!!!!".

4. GAF is not your therapist- While this topic IS for discussing mental health, we do not substitute for mental health professionals. Similar to self-diagnosing, attempting to be or looking for a mental health professional on an online forum does far more harm than good. We are here to support you, but we cannot be your therapist.


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With all that out of the way I suppose I should explain why I made this. It's pretty well-known and obvious that I, myself, struggle with some mental health issues. It personally helps me a lot being able to talk to people who are also in a similar boat as me. Not everyone has a good support system and can cause some to feel very alone because of that. This thread, as cheesy as it sounds, was created for the purpose of people (who want to participate, or hell, even just read) feeling less alone in their battles/struggles with mental health.

Before I progress any further, below are some helpful links if you are in a crisis and are unable/unwilling to reach out to a local professional.

Most Countries' Hotlines

A Textline For those Who are Not Comfortable with Speaking Over the Phone

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Now with all that out of the way, I suppose I should introduce myself a little more.

Hi, my name is Melon, and I am twenty-one. I am diagnosed with general anxiety, bipolar disorder, and borderline personality disorder. I currently am on a wonderful care-plan and have a fantastic therapist and psychiatrist. My biggest triggers are big, social events, and being alone in spacious places. I am an open-book (to an extent, obviously) and I love discussing mental health with those that are capable of holding a mature conversation.

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If you are not comfortable with saying what exactly you have, that's perfectly fine! Be as vague or as open (within reason) as you wish! Just want to do a quick rant? That's fine too. I love you all, and know that you aren't alone and you can always message me if you just need someone to listen. :messenger_heart:
 

-Arcadia-

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Aug 20, 2019
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This is such a fantastic topic, that I want to help start it off. I think I found a way I can do that, plus gain some genuine insight into the world, and some people I care about.

Regarding bipolar disorder, how can I be a better friend to people who have to deal with this? A while ago, I had a roommate with this, and it was a source of a lot of friction. I feel like we learned to live with each other a lot better, but it’s still something that I don’t have a lot of knowledge in dealing with.

I don’t... you can’t cheat sheet a person and an affliction, obviously, but are there things that I could do to be more supportive and helpful?
 

Melon

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This is such a fantastic topic, that I want to help start it off. I think I found a way I can do that, plus gain some genuine insight into the world, and some people I care about.

Regarding bipolar disorder, how can I be a better friend to people who have to deal with this? A while ago, I had a roommate with this, and it was a source of a lot of friction. I feel like we learned to live with each other a lot better, but it’s still something that I don’t have a lot of knowledge in dealing with.

I don’t... you can’t cheat sheet a person and an affliction, obviously, but are there things that I could do to be more supportive and helpful?
That's a great question! Being friends/acquaintances/etc. with someone who suffers from bipolar disorder can be pretty tricky at times due to the fact that a lot of what triggers them depends on their mood and how they're feeling that day. For example, say you have a friend who, most of the time, has a good sense of humor and can joke about pretty much anything. But one day you crack a joke and they go apeshit on you. It catches you off guard and you wonder where the hell that came from. It's shitty to experience and you probably blame yourself for it. It's important to know it's not your fault, bipolar people can just be difficult to go about with. The best advice I can give is proceeding with caution until you get to know them well and can read their patterns and behaviors better. It also doesn't hurt to just ask what they are and aren't comfortable with on a day you are not sure. It can probably feel like a monotonous task, but it definitely helps, in the long run, what boundaries you can and cannot cross.

Every person is different, regardless of what mental illness they have, and it's important to learn what their quirks and triggers are in order to preserve a friendship that you would like to build with them. One thing I forgot to add, is, as dumb as it sounds, to make sure you aren't too careful. It can make that person feel like a burden. As I said before, this shit can be tricky, but it can be worth it in the end. But it's also important to know when you need to take a step back. Your own mental health matters greatly, and if the other person is draining you, you need to back off. It may seem like a shitty thing to do, but your own health comes first.

I hope this helped at least a little.
 

Melon

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i've had nightmares every night for the last 7 years

they tell me it's because of accumulated, compounding trauma

getting kinda tired of it
I know putting a love reaction seems weird for a post like this, but take it as me sending you my love, or something like that. I relate to that to a certain level, and it really sucks. Trauma, it doesn't matter what kind or how it came to be, is a shitty thing to deal with, and I hope you are able to find peace. You can message me anytime if you need to talk.
 

Melon

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Thoughtful idea for a thread, Melon Melon
Thank you! I figured it would be worth a shot for people that need a place like this; somewhere they can vent/express concerns (within reason) and receive thoughtful advice instead of unwarranted criticism or just being told to suck it up. Not saying there aren't times for criticism or being told to suck it up, but overall, I just want this thread to be welcoming and open.
 

pantanovera

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A great effort, Some people are suffering from inner struggle due to various reasons and As I feel, this key point of the instability of mentality is keeping the things locked inside themselves without revealing them to someone..So, I hope this thread will be a nice place to reveal yourself get relived without exposing you real identity
 
Oct 26, 2018
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It's like advice at work from numerous bosses........... (not in these exact words, but close enough)

"When the company is doing poorly, don't take all the fault because it's not just you. When the company is kicking ass, don't gloat as it's not just you who did it"

In other words, for any of you with personal issues on a message board feeling like shit, if it makes you feel better (which is IMO 100% true), don't measure yourself vs. others..... especially on social media.

People on the web will usually only tell the good things in life. And half the time it's phony anyway. For every Facebook friend you have showing awesome family pics skiing at a chalet, probably half of them are either going through marital issues, money issues, their kid is a fucking brat etc.........

Put it this way. There's one person I knew in high school (never really knew her but I remember her cuz she was hot). You ask other peope who you are closer with remember this person or that person..... everything seems fine. Turns out she's got the usual nice family photos online..........

.............. turns out she was arrested for possessing drugs in the US and has a record.

Pretty sure she's not going to post that online.
 
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Dec 25, 2018
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Currently doing CBT to improve my confidence and knowing where problems that arise from external and internal factors.

I have Aspergers, so try and learn how to react to the best situations, but I do feel that ignorant people tend to both speak to me as if I am incapable of doing things, as well as overtly rely on me to get things done (as they assume we can handle simple tasks repetitively).
 

Melon

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Hi peeps! Today I am sharing something with you that I, personally, find very soothing during high-stress/anxiety situations. I'm sure some of you have already heard of it, but if not, well, say hi to Bilateral Music!

It may not work for you, but I'd say it's definitely worth a shot. It calms me down relatively fast during panic attacks. Though, to be fair, music is a part of my every-day-life so the comfort may stem from that, idk.

 

Kev Kev

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Really been beating myself up lately. Especially with telling myself I’m a failure.

I’m 32 and back to school for music a year and a half ago, and it’s going very well. Good grades, best student in most classes and I’ll be done after next semester. The actual playing music part is quite a challenge but I’m getting there slowly. I also quit the job I hated and I’m doing one I like a lot more now And I got my own apartment after living with various room mates for over a decade (which I hated).

For whatever reason though, I’m still feeling like it’s not enough and all of this is going to blow up in my face. I’m just trying to stay positive and talk it out whenever I can, instead of bottling it all up (although that is a challenge in itself... that I feel like a failure about lol).

Anyway, just wanted to vent. Really cool his thread is here, thanks for making it Melon Melon .
 

ROMhack

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Really been beating myself up lately. Especially with telling myself I’m a failure.

I’m 32 and back to school for music a year and a half ago, and it’s going very well. Good grades, best student in most classes and I’ll be done after next semester. The actual playing music part is quite a challenge but I’m getting there slowly. I also quit the job I hated and I’m doing one I like a lot more now And I got my own apartment after living with various room mates for over a decade (which I hated).

For whatever reason though, I’m still feeling like it’s not enough and all of this is going to blow up in my face. I’m just trying to stay positive and talk it out whenever I can, instead of bottling it all up (although that is a challenge in itself... that I feel like a failure about lol).

Anyway, just wanted to vent. Really cool his thread is here, thanks for making it Melon Melon .
This is very normal I think when people have gone through difficult situations in the past.

The way I like to think is to imagine that there's no point worrying about a future state of possible events. If something ends up being bad then it ends up being bad; it's foolhardy to also allow myself to feel bad in the nice moments before when things aren't bad. All you do is make myself feel worse for a longer time.

In the present, you're a student with excellent grades, doing something you love (music) with your own apartment. Try to concentrate on that part of your life cause it sounds pretty sweet bro :)
 
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Melon

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It's been really hard to stay strong lately. I have everything going for me, and yet, I feel like an utter failure and a waste of space. I feel like all my friends secretly hate me and find me annoying. I feel like no one gives a shit about me and that I'd be doing everyone in my life a favor by ending it. No, I'm not going to try anything. I'm not that low, nor do I ever want to get that low again. With that said, however, the urges are stronger than usual.

It's hard finding what purpose I serve in life. I'm moody. Annoying. Childish. Immature. An absolute crybaby who can't handle even the slightest bit of pressure. I don't get what people see in me. I feel like a nuisance. I know most of it is just my own negative thoughts getting to me and I'll get over this bump soon enough, but that doesn't change how much it stings at the moment.

I'm trying to keep myself as occupied and busy as possible, but the shit still lingers in the back of my mind. I'm ready for this wave to be over.
 
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-Arcadia-

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It's been really hard to stay strong lately. I have everything going for me, and yet, I feel like an utter failure and a waste of space. I feel like all my friends secretly hate me and find me annoying. I feel like no one gives a shit about me and that I'd be doing everyone in my life a favor by ending it. No, I'm not going to try anything. I'm not that low, nor do I ever want to get that low again. With that said, however, the urges are stronger than usual.

It's hard finding what purpose I serve in life. I'm moody. Annoying. Childish. Immature. An absolute crybaby who can't handle even the slightest bit of pressure. I don't get what people see in me. I feel like a nuisance. I know most of it is just my own negative thoughts getting to me and I'll get over this bump soon enough, but that doesn't change how much it stings at the moment.

I'm trying to keep myself as occupied and busy as possible, but the shit still lingers in the back of my mind. I'm ready for this wave to be over.
No.

You are a delight to be around, and just here on this silly forum, you bring so much happiness to people. You don’t show any of the negative qualities you describe.

Stay strong. You’re 100 percent right; this kind of thing likes to feast on insecurity and negative thought, and that’s all it is. Keep being you, keep being awesome, and I really hope things get better soon.
 

Edammer

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I want to wish you all the best of luck and hopefully a brighter and happier new year.

Feel free to PM me anytime if you need comfort or Someone to vent too. I am not much online here but I get an e-mail notice when I recieve a PM.

I feel your pain and I am free from depression for 3,5 years now. Ofcourse it isn’t totally gone but it’s managable.
My gf left me nearly 3 weeks ago and the blow is very very fucking hard. I am struggling quite a lot but I have to be strong and stay busy. No depression for me again, thats my goal!
 

EviLore

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Reminder that for serious issues, there is no substitute for professional help in real life, like seeing a therapist, clinical psychologist, or psychiatrist. Talking things over with an internet support group can reinforce negative behaviors and only treat surface symptoms while leaving the underlying issues to fester unresolved.

If you’re experiencing depression, anxiety, paranoia, or severe mood swings, talk with your doctor about it. We’re just a video game message board, after all.

Thanks.
 

ROMhack

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I want to wish you all the best of luck and hopefully a brighter and happier new year.

Feel free to PM me anytime if you need comfort or Someone to vent too. I am not much online here but I get an e-mail notice when I recieve a PM.

I feel your pain and I am free from depression for 3,5 years now. Ofcourse it isn’t totally gone but it’s managable.
My gf left me nearly 3 weeks ago and the blow is very very fucking hard. I am struggling quite a lot but I have to be strong and stay busy. No depression for me again, thats my goal!
That sucks. You sound like you've got a good fix on this but do hang in there. Breaking up is always shit but things certainly get better.
 
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Xaero Gravity

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I want to wish you all the best of luck and hopefully a brighter and happier new year.

Feel free to PM me anytime if you need comfort or Someone to vent too. I am not much online here but I get an e-mail notice when I recieve a PM.

I feel your pain and I am free from depression for 3,5 years now. Ofcourse it isn’t totally gone but it’s managable.
My gf left me nearly 3 weeks ago and the blow is very very fucking hard. I am struggling quite a lot but I have to be strong and stay busy. No depression for me again, thats my goal!
Don't worry about relationships right now. Take this time to live a little and have some fun, and don't go looking for your next relationship. Just let it find you.

There are plenty of girls out there with the same mindset, so you shouldn't have any trouble having a good time.
 

Edammer

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Don't worry about relationships right now. Take this time to live a little and have some fun, and don't go looking for your next relationship. Just let it find you.

There are plenty of girls out there with the same mindset, so you shouldn't have any trouble having a good time.
Thanx man. I better off on my own for a while.
Shit needs time. But Yeah, I have to go have a good time. Stop think about to much. During daytime its going well. Sleeping is a nightmare
 
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Xaero Gravity

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Thanx man. I better off on my own for a while.
Shit needs time. But Yeah, I have to go have a good time. Stop think about to much. During daytime its going well. Sleeping is a nightmare
If you're trying to fall asleep alone, try and occupy your mind with random things. They don't have to make sense, as long as they aren't about your ex. There's no point in dwelling on the past, it just ends up weighing you down. Plus it's her loss, not yours.
 
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Edammer

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If you're trying to fall asleep alone, try and occupy your mind with random things. They don't have to make sense, as long as they aren't about your ex. There's no point in dwelling on the past, it just ends up weighing you down. Plus it's her loss, not yours.
Will try to do that! Thanx for the kind words
 
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Kev Kev

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Having one of those night where I’m just trying to make it through bc I know I’ll feel better in the morning. Not in a suicidal way, don’t get me wrong, I just know that I’m in that funky shit right now and I just got to push through ya know?

I’m gonna try and play some RE2 Remake to take my mind off things (I just bought it a couple days ago so I’m still working on it, and it’s awesome!) but I don’t know how long that’ll keep my mind occupied.

Any good tips or things you guys do to make it through these kind of nights?
 
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ROMhack

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Just remembered this thread exists. Here's some thoughts I'd just like to get out:

I've been feeling super low over the past few months and have noticed some bad shifts in my behaviour. I find myself crying a lot more and also getting frustrated over some silly little things. I decided to have a bit of a soul search today because I've had two arguments with friends this past week. I made one of them cry which of course I felt immediately terrible about it and had to apologise. This person has been quite distant since it happened — understandable but not great for me as she's one of the only people I have around me. As well, work sucks but maybe that's a given as work always sucks. The saving grace is that I look great because how much of this I've been taking out on myself at the gym.

I'm thinking that I need to find something to focus my energy on positively. Really quite unsure what that should be...

Thanks for reading :)
 
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pochepiller2

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Just remembered this thread exists. Here's some thoughts I'd just like to get out:

I've been feeling super low over the past few months and have noticed some bad shifts in my behaviour. I find myself crying a lot more and also getting frustrated over some silly little things. I decided to have a bit of a soul search today because I've had two arguments with friends this past week. I made one of them cry which of course I felt immediately terrible about it and had to apologise. This person has been quite distant since it happened — understandable but not great for me as she's one of the only people I have around me. As well, work sucks but maybe that's a given as work always sucks. The saving grace is that I look great because how much of this I've been taking out on myself at the gym.

I'm thinking that I need to find something to focus my energy on positively. Really quite unsure what that should be...

Thanks for reading :)
Talking about it is half the battle.
 

pochepiller2

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Aug 4, 2019
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I wasn't feeling well this friday, hit me like a wall. I left work 2 hours early (boss was warned and is okay with my decision). Just to say a little thing that helped me the most is reading, even the most boring book is better than some dark self reflection of getting frustrated in a videogame. I know a lot more about fusion right now.
 
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SLoWMoTIoN

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I wasn't feeling well this friday, hit me like a wall. I left work 2 hours early (boss was warned and is okay with my decision). Just to say a little thing that helped me the most is reading, even the most boring book is better than some dark self reflection of getting frustrated in a videogame. I know a lot more about fusion right now.
SMT?
 
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matt404au

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Just remembered this thread exists. Here's some thoughts I'd just like to get out:

I've been feeling super low over the past few months and have noticed some bad shifts in my behaviour. I find myself crying a lot more and also getting frustrated over some silly little things. I decided to have a bit of a soul search today because I've had two arguments with friends this past week. I made one of them cry which of course I felt immediately terrible about it and had to apologise. This person has been quite distant since it happened — understandable but not great for me as she's one of the only people I have around me. As well, work sucks but maybe that's a given as work always sucks. The saving grace is that I look great because how much of this I've been taking out on myself at the gym.

I'm thinking that I need to find something to focus my energy on positively. Really quite unsure what that should be...

Thanks for reading :)
Does this have anything to do with the girl you were crushing on?
 

ROMhack

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Does this have anything to do with the girl you were crushing on?
Haha probably, but more indirectly.

I wasn't necessarily vibing her so decided against doing anything about it. I don't want to say it annoyed her but the dynamics have been slightly different since - she used to text me every day for example - and from my end, it kinda bugs me because it seems like there's a bit of friction now.
 
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matt404au

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Haha probably, but more indirectly.

I wasn't necessarily vibing her so decided against doing anything about it. I don't want to say it annoyed her but the dynamics have been slightly different since - she used to text me every day for example - and from my end, it kinda bugs me because it seems like there's a bit of friction now.
Wtf bro you dun goofed. Shoulda just smashed.
 

brap

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Haha probably, but more indirectly.

I wasn't necessarily vibing her so decided against doing anything about it. I don't want to say it annoyed her but the dynamics have been slightly different since - she used to text me every day for example - and from my end, it kinda bugs me because it seems like there's a bit of friction now.


you gotta go in for the kill. dont be a soyboy. you lost this one. go listen to some penfold and cry. its ok.
 

Whitesnake

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Jan 31, 2018
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A few days ago I had about a 36-hour period where I was just completely mentally exhausted and depressed.

I had nothing but negative thoughts ranging from “I don’t wanna go to work to today” to “I wonder if anyone would miss me if I ended it today” to “what if I just started driving in a random direction and left everything behind”.

I was really weary and I fell asleep at 6pm (thinking I would just be taking a ~1 hour nap) and then I woke up at 3am, played video games to numb my mind for about 6 hours. I went to work with my mind very hazy (probably from the sudden strange sleep schedule I had that night) and I literally couldn’t think about anything other than how much I wanna be there, so after about two hours of trying to work and finally deciding “I’m not gonna do this for another fucking 6 hours” I went home early, and lounged around until I went to bed at 10:30pm.

The following day I felt fine. In fact, I’d say that next day was a pretty good day.

I genuinely have no idea what it was that made me feel that way. I didn’t skip my medication, and even when I do it doesn’t make me feel like that. Maybe it was just a buildup of mental exhaustion? It was a rather long work week, but it’s not like I had anything in particular to worry or despair about. Will this happen again? Maybe it was just the weird sleep time making mind go out of whack?

I dunno. Just wanted to vent about this.
 

ROMhack

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With regard to my previous posts, I'm convinced it's work dragging me down. It's been sapping my motivation over the past few months and now it's at a point where I feel like I don't like being there. Sucks. I should probably look for a new one.
 
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