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Non-Australians discuss Australia's quirks

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Slayven said:
LOL, no nothing beats a PT cruiser.

How the hell did they sell for 10 years? Ugh, horrible car.

Poimandres said:
There are a lot of dickhead racists in Australia. Southern cross tatoos, "go back to your country" bumper stickers, and forced cringe worthy national pride.

Also a lot of chilled out humorous people here to balance it out.

They're a very vocal minority.

Bloody bogans.
 
Fredescu said:
99.9% of the time, someone engaging in Holden vs Ford argument = bogan.
Hey were not so bad....

boganBoy.jpg


"get us another VB will ya luv"
 
Pylon_Trooper said:
I think Keating once described Costello as "all tip and no iceberg". I do miss having that kind of surgical politician on the Canberra scene.

Paul is a one-off.

Left school at age 15 with an Intermediate Certificate then entered politics
Bob Hawke, a Rhodes Scholar, said of him: "With little formal education, his intellect led him to hobbies, one after another, all his life: car engines; budgerigars; the life of Winston Churchill; rock music and, as his taste matured, classical music and its visible sister, architecture."
After prime minister Bob Hawke refused to hand over power, resigned from the front bench, and destablised the government from the backbench
In 1993, won an election that was said to be "un-winable". In 1996, lost an election said to be "un-loseable"
Called the senate "unrepresentative swill"
Let home-loan interest rates reach 17 %. Became known as Mr 17%
Said Canadian Conrad Black could increase his ownership of Australian media if he gave Keating more "balanced" coverage. Asked to elaborate what "balanced" meant, Keating said, "I'm the prime minister."
After economic figures showed Australia was in recession, said: "This is the recession we had to have"
Told a protester on his ill-fated 1996 election campaign to "get a job"
Caused a diplomatic crisis by calling the Malaysian Prime Minister a 'recalcitrant.' Even when faced with trade sanctions over the comment, he refused to say "sorry"
The Malaysian Prime Minister, Mahathir Mohamed, said of him: "We can't do anything. If people have no manners, I mean children we can smack them [laughs] I think that a whole nation, or there generally is one nation who have no manners. It's very difficult, who resort to personal vilification and all that"
Said that Asian countries were the places you fly over on the way to Europe
After Sheikh Al Hilaly's immigration visa was rejected by security officials, Keating interferred and had it given for his own electoral benefit
Disliked cricket and ended the tradition of the PM's 11 vs touring teams. Also criticised Bob Hawke for being a "sports junkie"
Destroyed the Australian film industry. Keating scrapped the system of tax concessions that had proved successful in the 80s and replaced it with funding for film distributors, sales agents, and broadcasters. The funding system allowed Keating's party to have control over the type of movies being made, distributed, promoted and shown.
Said Sydney architecture was an "urban junkyard"
Said on gay marriage, "Two blokes with moustaches and a spaniel do not make a family
Managed a band called the 'Ramrods'
Collected European cuckoo clocks
Said he was the Placido Domingo of Australian politics
Wore Ermenegildo Zegna suits
Asked journalists to stop photographing him from behind where his bald patch could be seen
Said Australia risked becoming a "banana republic"
Kissed the ground of the Kokoda track. Some old diggers interpreted the gesture as a sign that Keating wanted his arse in the air
Used phrases like: "Honourable Members opposite squeal like stuck pigs"
Said of John Hewson, former leader of the coalition: "(His performance) is like being flogged with a warm lettuce leaf"
Said: " Australia is the arse end of the world"
Biographer Blanche D'Alpuget noted that he was a great ladies man, because he loved talking about shopping and clothes
Repealed the ban on lesbians and gays serving in the armed forces
Introduced "interdependency visas" allowing same sex partners of Australian citizens to migrate to Australia
Was the first Australian Prime Minister to offer a message of support to the Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras
Said he was a Collingwood fan and that he hoped to see them "kick a try"
Appointed gay activist judge Michael Kirby to the High Court. Kirby became known as the great dissenter, and disagreed with his fellow judges in almost every second case
Said he was a practising Catholic
After losing office, divorced his wife and pursued a happy lifestyle.
 
Slayven said:
He said they call Aboriginals Bongs because that the sound that is heard when their head hits the bumper of a jeep.
We're so goddamn racist it's scary.

Also, we're culturally naive which leads us think that things that aren't racist to us couldn't be racist to anyone. "But the guy was black, it couldn't have been racist!"
 
Slayven said:
He said they call Aboriginals Bongs because that the sound that is heard when their head hits the bumper of a jeep.

fucking wow man. thats all messed up.
 
Salazar said:
I take it you missed the episode when Ian Hewitson made an icecream and iced vo-vos cake.

I don't like any of the Arnott's biscuits that have the white cream or red jam stuff.

I mainly stick with plain stuff. Milk Arrowroot, Scotch Finger, Milk Coffee, Chocolate Ripple.

agrajag said:
does the toilet water flush the other way

Nope, that's an old wives tale.
 
Black_Stride said:
How you going?

^Hate this saying...........how the fuck am i supposed to respond?

Yeah not too bad.
Heaps good.

lunarworks said:
Ya, the only real thing I find odd about Australia is that all the wild creatures there want to kill you. That, and the Vegemite.

Seriously, I've lived in the bush surrounded by snakes and spiders, lived near the beach and gone surfing every day and I've never been bitten or attacked by anything in my 33 years. P.S Those huge spiders here are harmless to humans, they're only scary when they run out of your air vents in your car while your driving down the road!

theb0xmIke said:
Mate the F6 is the fastest Aussie Sedan and truly is the most Aussie.

Holden have better V8s but the Turbo 6s still smash the Holden boys ;)

XR6 Turbo ftw. I hate Holdens and the bogans who drive them(well mostly). Not to mention Camry drivers, FUCK those people too.
 
ThoseDeafMutes said:

Should I change my gaf name to "shazza310" then :p

Poimandres said:
There are a lot of dickhead racists in Australia. Southern cross tatoos, "go back to your country" bumper stickers, and forced cringe worthy national pride.

Also a lot of chilled out humorous people here to balance it out.

I don't see that many racists here really, AND I live in QLD - the bogan capital. The whole "Australians are racist" thing is really overblown.

BGBW said:
In Home and Away (yes, I am basing your whole country on a soap), characters often pop in and out of other people's homes without even knocking on the door. Are you really that trusting that you leave your front door open?

Basically. With good friends I just pop over to their house to check if they're home to hang out. Isn't it dangerous to keep the door locked when you're at home? What if there's a fire and you can't find the keys to the door? No one bad is going to come in.
 
Deified Data said:
Vegemite sounds...awful. I always thought it was like Nutella, or something. Shows what I know.
yeah, cultured antipodeans eat marmite. Vegemite is for the rabble.
 
Australian Accents.

I think the problem with vegemite is that people think its going to be like chocolate, and when its not sweet they get a bit of a shock. I explained that to my Japanese host family before giving it to them and they loved it. Said it tasted like Miso.
 
SPE said:
2. The quality of the TV. For fucks sake, it's abominable.
4. Political reporting in the media. Holy fuck it's limited and universally terrible.

While your other points are a mixed bag of shit, these are absolutely spot on. The television in this country has to be the worst of any first world nation in the world. There is nothing of quality made here barring the few original comedies on the ABC / SBS, and even then half of them are more than likely to sell out to the big commercial stations and become just another talking head bullshit personality.

Frontline remains the best and most relevant television show we've ever made, and that ended over a decade ago.

I no longer watch television, and I'd sooner kill myself than take any of the politics in this country seriously.
 
I like Australians because I have this assumption in my head that they are like Reverse-Canadians. Both descendants of Britain, but South instead of North. Hot instead of cold. I feel a kinship already.

The only thing that's far different is the whole political tendency to censor the media/the internet. That's a path Canada stayed away from.
 
commedieu said:
Its good in moderation. Definitely an acquired taste, but its pretty damn good. lil mite, lil butter...profit.

Closest thing, would be one of those beef concentrated flavor cubes? not as salty, but damn close.

Vegemite is so good I forgo butter entirely.

theb0xmIke said:
Mate the F6 is the fastest Aussie Sedan and truly is the most Aussie.

Holden have better V8s but the Turbo 6s still smash the Holden boys ;)


Anyways heres some Australian Food Products

http://about-australia-shop.com/images/static-arnotts002.jpg

Tiny Teddies!! Who used to have em for School?

Ah, the good ol' days when Shapes actually had flavouring.
 
BocoDragon said:
The only thing that's far different is the whole political tendency to censor the media/the internet. That's a path Canada stayed away from.

Some of that stuff is poorly reported. Granted, not all of it, but as soon as a knobhead politician floats a dumb private members bill, it gets taken—domestically and internationally—as having immediate and entire force of law.
 
BocoDragon said:
I like Australians because I have this assumption in my head that they are like Reverse-Canadians. Both descendants of Britain, but South instead of North. Hot instead of cold. I feel a kinship already.

The only thing that's far different is the whole political tendency to censor the media/the internet. That's a path Canada stayed away from.
New Zealand is to us what Canada is the the US. Or vice-versa, since we tend to make fun of each other equally. The difference is, we can freely live and work in either country without huge restrictions or border security.
 
BocoDragon said:
I like Australians because I have this assumption in my head that they are like Reverse-Canadians. Both descendants of Britain, but South instead of North. Hot instead of cold. I feel a kinship already.

The only thing that's far different is the whole political tendency to censor the media/the internet. That's a path Canada stayed away from.
our internet is not censored. and other than games media here isnt strict. you can say fuck knob on the radio in the middle of the day if you so choose.


also, some one needs to talk about our camels. im on my phone so i cant. but i assume others dont know too much about our wild camel herds
 
shadyspace said:
Does it bother any of you that you still have an allegiance to England's royalty?

I'd wager the only people who still remember that only do so because it's an excuse to have a piss-up.
 
Kritz said:
I'd wager the only people who still remember that only do so because it's an excuse to have a piss-up.
I had no idea there was a "Queen of Canada" and a "Queen of Australia" until like a week ago.
 
shadyspace said:
I had no idea there was a "Queen of Canada" and a "Queen of Australia" until like a week ago.

Aren't they the same person?

I honestly don't know.

Granted, I'm Tasmanian. We're not good enough for Australia and not close enough for New Zealand. I like our beer, though. :(
(just kidding, it's terrible! but it's cheap)
 
HolyCheck said:
also, some one needs to talk about our camels. im on my phone so i cant. but i assume others dont know too much about our wild camel herds

All they need to know is that if they buy a cheap bakery pie in regional Australia, there's a good chance some of that meat is camel.
 
NotTarts said:
New Zealand is to us what Canada is the the US. Or vice-versa, since we tend to make fun of each other equally. The difference is, we can freely live and work in either country without huge restrictions or border security.
I'm quite aware of the similar dicotomy... my father's girlfriend is from New Zealand. :)

Although, keep in mind that Australia has 2/3rds the population of Canada, so while New Zealand might be your "Canada" in a southern hemisphere context, you'd be Canada's "Canada" if you were located up here ;)
 
Kritz said:
Aren't they the same person?

I honestly don't know.

Granted, I'm Tasmanian. We're not good enough for Australia and not close enough for New Zealand. I like our beer, though. :(
(just kidding, it's terrible! but it's cheap)
Yeah. The Queen of England is the Queen of Canada and the Queen of Australia.
 
Kritz said:
Aren't they the same person?

I honestly don't know.

Granted, I'm Tasmanian. We're not good enough for Australia and not close enough for New Zealand. I like our beer, though. :(
(just kidding, it's terrible! but it's cheap)
Yes, of course, but she's actually an independent monarch to all the Commonwealth states. She's not our queen because she's queen of the UK, she's our queen as she is the queen of Australia. The positions are distinct, but held by the same person.

And yeah, we can't expect much as the inhabitants of this forgotten island at the end of the world. We're distant to a country defined by its distance, haha.
 
shadyspace said:
I had no idea there was a "Queen of Canada" and a "Queen of Australia" until like a week ago.
Same person, of course.

The monarchy in the commonwealth is entirely symbolic, and hardly matters in real terms. We're democracies, really.

It's not really a big deal .... I will say that the American "myth of the founding fathers and 'what they wanted'" looms FAR larger in the American political mind than anything to do with the British Monarchy in countries like Canada and Australia. Every country has their silly myths of where their power eventually is traced back to.... As long as the elected officials are the ones who actually make decisions, the symbolism is just cute stuff to keep around.

On my Canadian student loan, it says that I was loaned money by The Crown. So the Queen lent me money! She's a cool lady.
 
So... Are kangaroos found in Australia kind of like how deer are found in America? By this I mean kind of hidden, make spontaneous appearances, etc.

Or do they come out and start attacking people or anything? Are they peaceful?
I once saw a mating video on them in a biology class and basically whoever became the alpha kangaroo after a long as fist/kick fight went around and had sex with all the other female kangaroos. He like gained permission to do it.
 
goomba said:
Only been to the south of the south island?. Hint it gets warmer the further north you go , just never as horribly hot and humid as much as Australia gets.
Honestly, I really like New Zealand. If I was ever going to move away from Australia, New Zealand would be my first choice - It's close to home and has a somewhat similar culture and accent. Plus the geography of the South Island is completely different to Australia in a beautiful way.

The problem is, I don't find the North Island interesting at all and even the warmest/sunniest place on the South Island (Nelson, AFAIK) is just too cold for me - 20 degrees max temp in summer isn't something I find ideal. I'll admit that the picture was an over-exaggeration, though :P

Also, your trees! Oh god. They're so small. Almost cute in a way, but still too small. Any country without eucalypts just feels so incredibly alien to me. It might sound crazy but just seeing the Sydney morning sun rising over eucalyptus at 6AM after being in Germany for a month was one of the best feelings in the world.
 
BocoDragon said:
I like Australians because I have this assumption in my head that they are like Reverse-Canadians. Both descendants of Britain, but South instead of North. Hot instead of cold. I feel a kinship already.

The only thing that's far different is the whole political tendency to censor the media/the internet. That's a path Canada stayed away from.

Actually the similarities are quite striking. We both have a fairly low crime rate, enjoy a fairly secular existence, our biggest problem is that we're both socialist countries, I've heard they're considered evil. ;)
 
Thoraxes said:
So... Are kangaroos found in Australia kind of like how deer are found in America? By this I mean kind of hidden, make spontaneous appearances, etc.

Or do they come out and start attacking people or anything? Are they peaceful?
Kangaroo's are a lot less easily startled than deer. They're fairly easy to see if you're somewhere where they frequent, which is almost anywhere away from the major cities around grassland at dusk.

They don't usually attack unless provoked. In this case, by a dog: http://www.news.com.au/top-stories/...ed-by-a-kangaroo/story-e6frfkp9-1226170827978. If I was going to be stereotypically Australian I would then say "but you don't afta worry about them, the sharks got em all" http://www.news.com.au/features/sec...ttacked-by-shark/story-e6frfljr-1111115101159
 
Sutton Dagger said:
Actually the similarities are quite striking. We both have a fairly low crime rate, enjoy a fairly secular existence...

I'll stop you right there before you embarrass yourself. This is a Christian nation.

1LN2r.jpg
 
Sutton Dagger said:
Actually the similarities are quite striking. We both have a fairly low crime rate, enjoy a fairly secular existence, our biggest problem is that we're both socialist countries, I've heard they're considered evil. ;)
Not to mention that we both have both have far more useless space than our relatively small populations know what to do with. It's almost absurd, really, to have a landmass so vast only populated in a handful of cities scattered around the coast.
 
shadyspace said:
Does it bother any of you that you still have an allegiance to England's royalty?
Only when they remind me I have the same Head of State but can't live in any of the other countries she 'rules'. Shit is fucked up.
 
Dead Man said:
Only when they remind me I have the same Head of State but can't live in any of the other countries she 'rules'. Shit is fucked up.
Never thought about that.... that does suck. I wish I could move to other Commonwealth nations on a whim.
 
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