DryvBy
Member
I went with my family last night to see this Seth Rogan take on TMNT. I hate this guy already but I did enjoy him as DK in Mario and I liked him in Chip and Dale Rescue Rangers the movie.
Just about every single minute of this movie was annoying to me and my family. The action was boring, the art style was headache inducing (it's not Spiderverse), the story is so changed up that it's possible this was supposed to be a different franchise. I'm not even joking when I say that the Bay movies are more faithful to the TMNT universe.
Visual/Audio: Originally I didn't mind the art and it's one of the reasons I went to see it but when the action kicks in, this claymation style of animation becomes a headache to watch. It's like playing a video game at 15fps and trying to enjoy it. The art style blends with the backgrounds constantly and the lower looking framerate is just Big Pharma's way of making you buy some Tylenol after watching it. The turtle design is fine, except for Don, and some of the villains are great. But all of the humans look like middle schoolers drew them. It's really crazy someone got paid to be this bad of an artist.
On top of that, the music is pumped almost non-stop through the movie so scenes feel like they're trying to be music videos rather than fight scenes. The voice acting was fine except for Don's and Michaelangelo's acrors. They sound like their prepubescent Steve Urkles trying to initiate Steve Urkle. Don sounds like he was kicked in the nuts before each take. Ice Cube was just Ice Cube, love it or hate it. I liked Raph and Leo a lot, April was fine and Jackie Chan fit for the voice but not the character.
The Story: Almost nothing about this movie is TMNT. Some people might be ok with reinventing everything about a franchise but it's changed to the point where there's almost 0 TMNT left in it. I'm going to spoiler tag the rest of this because the story is just flat out crap.
The entire movie is just some crappy "acceptance" movie with a nonsense story taped over it. Nothing about it is enjoyable.
Just about every single minute of this movie was annoying to me and my family. The action was boring, the art style was headache inducing (it's not Spiderverse), the story is so changed up that it's possible this was supposed to be a different franchise. I'm not even joking when I say that the Bay movies are more faithful to the TMNT universe.
Visual/Audio: Originally I didn't mind the art and it's one of the reasons I went to see it but when the action kicks in, this claymation style of animation becomes a headache to watch. It's like playing a video game at 15fps and trying to enjoy it. The art style blends with the backgrounds constantly and the lower looking framerate is just Big Pharma's way of making you buy some Tylenol after watching it. The turtle design is fine, except for Don, and some of the villains are great. But all of the humans look like middle schoolers drew them. It's really crazy someone got paid to be this bad of an artist.
On top of that, the music is pumped almost non-stop through the movie so scenes feel like they're trying to be music videos rather than fight scenes. The voice acting was fine except for Don's and Michaelangelo's acrors. They sound like their prepubescent Steve Urkles trying to initiate Steve Urkle. Don sounds like he was kicked in the nuts before each take. Ice Cube was just Ice Cube, love it or hate it. I liked Raph and Leo a lot, April was fine and Jackie Chan fit for the voice but not the character.
The Story: Almost nothing about this movie is TMNT. Some people might be ok with reinventing everything about a franchise but it's changed to the point where there's almost 0 TMNT left in it. I'm going to spoiler tag the rest of this because the story is just flat out crap.
The Turtles are teenagers, or so they say. They're basically 10 year old kids with zoomer characteristics. None of them have an individual personality. They let you know Leo is the leader by saying it. They let you know Raph is a hot head by saying it. None of this is shown in the characters.
Splinter is an unwise foolish goof ball, which is nothing resembling Splinter. He hates the humans and has a fear of being milked by them. Because of an event with the humans, he teaches the Zoomer turtles how to fight using cheese martial arts movies, YouTube and TikTok. The villains are the turtles but Superfly (their Splinter) is violent.
April is a goofy teen who's unpopular but teaches the turtles how to be liked by humans, something she struggles with already. She's doing a news report on the turtles but for who, you don't know, since she becomes "puke girl" when talking on screen.
The Turtles don't respect Splinter at all except Leo. They just mock him and treat him like the stupid old fool he is. When they meet April, who Leo is falling for at first sight, they encounter their first actual fight with a bunch of biker thieves. Now, they set this up to be funny and great with Raph accidentally throwing a sai into Donnie's leg showing that they're really untrained and unprepared but then they Turtle Sue the who thing and beat everyone up with ease. None of this makes any sense in how they set it up.
April befriends the turtles and tells them about Superfly killing some humans. They end up hanging out with a huge list of villains from our past, and overall liking their company. But their plan to kill all humans gets in the way of their friendship so they have to fight again to save the world. Their fight is short lived and they're captured by corporate and awfully drawn TCRI lady who begins milking them (dumb running gag in the movie). Splinter saves the day thanks to April informing him, they go to fight Superfly and stop his machine from killing everyone.
During this battle is when it was really game over for story telling. The good guys show up and tell the villains they're all cousins and shouldn't fight. Every villain, Bebop and Rocksteady included, abandon helping their "father" Superfly because they don't want to kill all humans. So the turtles, Splinter and several villains push Superfly into the ooze which of course turns him into a super Superfly. It's now a Godzilla/King Kong movie.
While Superfly is destroying the city, the humans decide that it's actually the turtles who they haven't really seen that's the leaders and controlling Superfly. April rushes Channel 10 and corrects them which makes the humans accept the now-good guy villains and turtles in an effort to save the city. The turtles are entirely worthless during this fight and are captured before they even throw out a karate chop, making them entirely worthless heroes. The villains, Splinter and humans save the day.
After the boss fight, all of the villains move into the sewers with Splinter and his new lady roach friend, and the turtles go to high school for the first time. The end.
Splinter is an unwise foolish goof ball, which is nothing resembling Splinter. He hates the humans and has a fear of being milked by them. Because of an event with the humans, he teaches the Zoomer turtles how to fight using cheese martial arts movies, YouTube and TikTok. The villains are the turtles but Superfly (their Splinter) is violent.
April is a goofy teen who's unpopular but teaches the turtles how to be liked by humans, something she struggles with already. She's doing a news report on the turtles but for who, you don't know, since she becomes "puke girl" when talking on screen.
The Turtles don't respect Splinter at all except Leo. They just mock him and treat him like the stupid old fool he is. When they meet April, who Leo is falling for at first sight, they encounter their first actual fight with a bunch of biker thieves. Now, they set this up to be funny and great with Raph accidentally throwing a sai into Donnie's leg showing that they're really untrained and unprepared but then they Turtle Sue the who thing and beat everyone up with ease. None of this makes any sense in how they set it up.
April befriends the turtles and tells them about Superfly killing some humans. They end up hanging out with a huge list of villains from our past, and overall liking their company. But their plan to kill all humans gets in the way of their friendship so they have to fight again to save the world. Their fight is short lived and they're captured by corporate and awfully drawn TCRI lady who begins milking them (dumb running gag in the movie). Splinter saves the day thanks to April informing him, they go to fight Superfly and stop his machine from killing everyone.
During this battle is when it was really game over for story telling. The good guys show up and tell the villains they're all cousins and shouldn't fight. Every villain, Bebop and Rocksteady included, abandon helping their "father" Superfly because they don't want to kill all humans. So the turtles, Splinter and several villains push Superfly into the ooze which of course turns him into a super Superfly. It's now a Godzilla/King Kong movie.
While Superfly is destroying the city, the humans decide that it's actually the turtles who they haven't really seen that's the leaders and controlling Superfly. April rushes Channel 10 and corrects them which makes the humans accept the now-good guy villains and turtles in an effort to save the city. The turtles are entirely worthless during this fight and are captured before they even throw out a karate chop, making them entirely worthless heroes. The villains, Splinter and humans save the day.
After the boss fight, all of the villains move into the sewers with Splinter and his new lady roach friend, and the turtles go to high school for the first time. The end.
The entire movie is just some crappy "acceptance" movie with a nonsense story taped over it. Nothing about it is enjoyable.
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