• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.

Tesla can't afford toilet paper

CyberPanda

Banned
Tesla CEO Elon Musk recently launched a new ‘hardcore’ cost-cutting effort to bring the automaker back to profitability and we are starting to learn more about what the plan actually consists of – hint: no more toilet paper.

In an email to employees last week, Musk said that he is implementing a new cost-cutting initiative that will see all the teams examine every payment, including “parts, salary, travel expenses, and rent.”

The CEO added that Zach Kirkhorn, Tesla’s new CFO, will review and sign every page of outgoing payment while Musk himself will review and sign every tenth page.

A week later, we are starting to get a better idea of what kind of cost-cutting efforts employees have been taking following Musk’s warning and it’s indeed quite “hardcore”, as the CEO mentioned.

Sources familiar with the matter told Electrek that teams at several Tesla facilities are going to some extremes in attempts to cut costs, including skipping on ordering office supplies – even toilet paper.

A source even said that some employees are bringing toilet paper from home to the office in an attempt to reduce their overhead.

Other more standard cost reduction methods are also being employed. For example, two sources said that Tesla is cutting down on stipends given to employees for cellphone plans.

Every expense that is not believed to be “essential” for the sale and delivery of vehicles is being reviewed and possibly frozen.

Last quarter, Tesla lost $700 million.

The automaker is currently addressing the situation on two fronts. This cost-cutting effort aims to reduce expenses and they also expect to increase revenue with a potentially new record for deliveries this quarter.

One of the bottlenecks in deliveries is the detailing of the vehicles and as Tesla’s delivery volume increased, they relied on car washing businesses.

A source familiar with the matter says that some stores are now cutting down on the expense and in order to still complete the work, some employees are bringing the cars home and cleaning them on their own time.

We contacted Tesla about the cost-cutting effort and we will update if we get a comment.

Electrek’s Take

Honestly, that’s not really what I expected when Elon called for a “hardcore” cost-cutting effort, but it’s certainly pretty hardcore.

To be fair, Tesla is not the only automaker closely looking at its expenses.

Daimler just announced that they are also doing “a sweeping cost review“, but I don’t think it involves toilet paper.

On the bright side, it’s fairly incredible that Tesla has employees who are so committed to the mission and success of the company that they are willing to bring their own toilet paper or wash cars on their time.

I don’t think there are many companies out there who can say the same.

But I think Tesla would be better off investing in the well-being of those employees who are so willing to go to extremes for the company.

In other words, it’s obvious that Tesla is not in a financial situation where it can’t buy toilet paper. It’s just that some employees are nervous about the new “hardcore” cost-cutting effort that they are going too far with it.

Tesla fans are calling me a short for posting things like that. It just goes to show how disconnected with reality they are because I actually added to my long position on Tesla this week.

It doesn’t mean that I can’t recognize when the company does stupid things and I can’t share those things with the blog’s readers.

 

RiccochetJ

Gold Member
I think it's cool that they're going through their expenses and seeing exactly where and which facilities may need some adjustments. Some employees or dipshit middle management are going overboard.

I have to imagine that Tesla employs some fairly intelligent people and I find it a bit funny to see them do something stupid like bringing your own asswipe. I mean if you want those flushable wipes (which are bad according to plumbers btw), then yes, bring your own. But I'm sure they're not going to take away your 1-ply.
 

haxan7

Volunteered as Tribute
Not hardcore enough. They need to start reusing their toilet paper using the two bucket disinfectant method. First bucket has heavy chemical disinfectants, you put the used toilet paper in there first. Second bucket has half pee and half water. Soak for about 1 minute in the chemicals, 30 minutes in the pee/water. Voila. Fresh free reusable toilet paper.
 

Eotheod

Member
I don't it is actually as "hardcore" as toilet paper being banned like the shitty article is trying to clickbait on. All expenses are being reviewed, and for good reason. Some company expenditures are through the roof if left to their own devices and as such when needed actions have to be taken to curve that expenditure.
 

Bullet Club

Member
mK5Pzsi.jpg
 

CyberPanda

Banned
Not hardcore enough. They need to start reusing their toilet paper using the two bucket disinfectant method. First bucket has heavy chemical disinfectants, you put the used toilet paper in there first. Second bucket has half pee and half water. Soak for about 1 minute in the chemicals, 30 minutes in the pee/water. Voila. Fresh free reusable toilet paper.
I love the way your mind works.
 
Slashing expenses is a sign of a company in trouble. This will only be a temporary solution if they cannot increase revenue, obviously.
 
Last edited:
there's gotta be plenty of scrap building material they can use instead

a thin slab of cold rolled steel, it's more durable than toiler paper and it's reusable

you can keep it in your pocket

just sand the edges so you don't slice your butthole

i mean if that isn't forward thinking
 
Last edited:

Kenpachii

Member
Should start making terminators that eliminate the need for humans so he doesn't have to buy toilet paper.

Makes only sense.
 

Grinchy

Banned
I understand wanting to tighten up the budget when you're losing $700M, but office supplies and toilet paper aren't gonna get you there.
 

xrnzaaas

Member
So when will they start cutting down on the car production costs... oh wait, they're already doing that.
 
Last edited:
Teslas are ugly looking cars. I don't understand why people buy that shit.
Status basically. People like to brag how green they are despite the batteries under the car and how much pollution was released while manufacturing the small plastic/metal pieces of the very same car. Who would care, right? This pollution will stay far away from their gardens. Probably in a developing country.
 

Mista

Banned
Tesla can’t afford toilet paper means Elon Musk doesn’t have money? I find that hard to believe. The man is shitting money so how can they not afford toilet papers?! This whole hardcore bollocks won’t go on for long
Teslas are ugly looking cars. I don't understand why people buy that shit.
Lazy pricks that are enjoying the auto-drive
 
Status basically. People like to brag how green they are despite the batteries under the car and how much pollution was released while manufacturing the small plastic/metal pieces of the very same car. Who would care, right? This pollution will stay far away from their gardens. Probably in a developing country.
Yeah pretty much lol. The city where I work at, there's a ton of Tesla cars I see being driven around. I'm like ok... This city is pissing down rain every day, so obviously you're not using solar panels to charge these and actually save on anything. You're paying a ton on your electricity bills.

Oh maybe it's the let's the environment bullshit. But wait, nah, can't be that either, you're not saving shit. The manufacturing of those cars is causing pollution. If you really wanna save the environment, stop using electricity, get rid of your iPhones and laptops, go live in a damn tree or something.

At that point, it's like just buy a damn lambo or something else. Every other person on this city is driving a damn Tesla, you don't stand out. At least with a lambo you will.
 

juliotendo

Member
Tesla Motors is a great concept in theory and on paper, but the company is so poorly mismanaged and so poorly run that it’s a joke.

The only thing keeping this decaying company alive are the foolish Sillicon Valley circle jerk tech investors and the base of Whole Foods shopping upper middle class white liberals that buy their essentially overpriced stylish $70k golf carts.
 
Last edited:

Dr.Guru of Peru

played the long game
Yeah pretty much lol. The city where I work at, there's a ton of Tesla cars I see being driven around. I'm like ok... This city is pissing down rain every day, so obviously you're not using solar panels to charge these and actually save on anything. You're paying a ton on your electricity bills.

Oh maybe it's the let's the environment bullshit. But wait, nah, can't be that either, you're not saving shit. The manufacturing of those cars is causing pollution. If you really wanna save the environment, stop using electricity, get rid of your iPhones and laptops, go live in a damn tree or something.

At that point, it's like just buy a damn lambo or something else. Every other person on this city is driving a damn Tesla, you don't stand out. At least with a lambo you will.
Uh, not sure what city you live in but generally electricity is way cheaper than gasoline. I’d save around 3000$ a year in costs if I switched to an electric car (I drive a lot). I’m just waiting for the right one to come a long (agree that Tesla’s are boring, although the Model 3 doesn’t look too bad in the right angle).

Also, no one is cross shopping a Lamborghini or a Tesla. You can’t even pick up a Lambo at the scrap yard for 70k.
 
Last edited:

Wings 嫩翼翻せ

so it's not nice
Outside of how I feel about Elon Musk, I respect the dedication of some of these workers. You would never find me doing some of that stuff on my own time though, but then again I'm not that passionate about motor vehicles.

I hope those that are wholeheartedly giving their time succeed in some way so they feel like it was worth it.
 
Uh, not sure what city you live in but generally electricity is way cheaper than gasoline. I’d save around 3000$ a year in costs if I switched to an electric car (I drive a lot). I’m just waiting for the right one to come a long (agree that Tesla’s are boring, although the Model 3 doesn’t look too bad in the right angle).

Also, no one is cross shopping a Lamborghini or a Tesla. You can’t even pick up a Lambo at the scrap yard for 70k.
City I work in, the cost of electricity is a lot. Also the people that are commuting live like literally 10 minutes away from this well known tech company. Everyone full time employed and not on a contract is making upwards of 80,000$ a year which they can afford a lambo eventually. I was saying they're anywhere close or the same dproce, just that if you want a luxury car and want to stand out, might as well go for a lambo or any other car other than a Tesla which everyone in this city is driving.
 

Dr.Guru of Peru

played the long game
City I work in, the cost of electricity is a lot. Also the people that are commuting live like literally 10 minutes away from this well known tech company. Everyone full time employed and not on a contract is making upwards of 80,000$ a year which they can afford a lambo eventually. I was saying they're anywhere close or the same dproce, just that if you want a luxury car and want to stand out, might as well go for a lambo or any other car other than a Tesla which everyone in this city is driving.
No, you can’t afford a Lambo on an 80k a year salary. You’d need to make at least 10x that to reasonably afford one.
 
Last edited:
Top Bottom