Support NeoGAF

[DeepEnigma]

Spanking your kids, and beating them are two very different things. People acting like taking an open palm or a hairbrush to their kid's bare ass is the same as a closed fist beating are delusional.

And then those girls all grow up and ask daddy to be spanked. I am sensing a pattern here.

 

[EviLore]

It’s a problem and I don’t know what the solution is

Electrified floors in the classroom

 

[Jsisto]

Plenty of kids from my parents generation and beyond were punished by receiving a good smacking and turned out perfectly normal. I think the UK is spot on. Theres reasonable physical punishment and then there's abuse. It's not a black or white issue. You lean too hard into criminalizing this and you'll have perfectly good parents getting their kids taken away because a neighbor saw them smacking their kid in the butt for misbehaving, and that's fucked up.

 

[Tams]

my dad was a vicious bastard. would beat the absolute fuck out of me if I even said something he didn't like.

I remember when he had an affair..I was about 13.. so to punish him for what he did to my mum I destroyed his magazine collection.. some of the issues were worth a pretty penny.

he beat me so badly with a bit of wood that he found in the garden that I not only had physical injuries but a nasty infection after it.

so as someone who lives in the UK... I disagree with this

I mean, what he did to you was abuse and even assault. Even back then you could have gotten him locked up for that.

 

[Tams]

Say this on le Reddit and get downvoted to oblivion.

So I'm glad to see so much sense here. A smack or a clip are not a beating.

A beating is imho too far and close to an actual attack (that could get out of hand). But a smack on the arse or hand, or a clip behind the ear are not only fine, but good.

I certainly needed the odd sore ear.

My parents also refused to feed me for any meal I turned my nose up at. I bet that would be classified as abuse these days.

 

[Jinzo Prime]

I'm shocked the UK government decided not to get involved in something, for once. They usually have a hard-on for banning everything.

 

[StreetsofBeige]

Spanking your kids, and beating them are two very different things. People acting like taking an open palm or a hairbrush to their kid's bare ass is the same as a closed fist beating are delusional.

100% true.

That's because people who grew up recently have no concept of things. It's all black and white. Somehow a spanking is considered the same as a baseball bat to the skull.

All of us who are older all got punished with a slap or kick to the ass here and there. None of us got sent to hospital as if mom and dad beat us up to death's door.

And hey it works wonders. If they tell you to go to bed or dont skip school, you dont piss them off. It also comes from parents experiences. Mine were dirt poor coming to Canada and half the family tree was already killed when they came over. So when things improved a lot, they expect the kids to take advantage of how good it is here. They worked their asses off and the government is pretty lax and friendly. Even boring shit like going to the dentist is taken for granted. Not every kid or fam in the world has dental offices everywhere and companies paying benefits to cover it. So dont blow the opportunity and leach off them like lazy asses as they didnt have the opportunities growing up.

 

[Ozzy Onya A2Z]

Win for parenting.

Jokes aside the ruling makes sense, there are laws to prevent abuse, violence and more so why create surplus laws. If it were up to me I'd push for a licence required to become a parent(s). Shit is crazy you have to have a licence to drive a car or a background check to work with kids but anyone can just pop out their own kids and not care for or abuse them with very little checks and balances in place. The laws are a framework but more needs to be done by parents/society/governments around caring for and raising children. The current systems and schooling with its hands tied with regards to discipline are severely lacking; I include a number of parents in that too, some are just far too relaxed or overzealous with strictness. Balance is a tough thing as a parent.

 

[The Pleasure]

Time to bring it back

 

[Cyberpunkd]

there are laws to prevent abuse, violence and more so why create surplus laws.

Except there are no laws, as indicated in the OP:

In England and Northern Ireland it is legal for a carer or parent to discipline their child physically if it is a "reasonable" punishment.

As all psychologists will tell you and supported by multitude studies - no physical violence against a child is “reasonable”, any physical punishment causes changes in the brain.

You want to hit someone hit someone your own size, not a human 1 meter tall.

 

[Cyberpunkd]

A beating is imho too far and close to an actual attack (that could get out of hand). But a smack on the arse or hand, or a clip behind the ear are not only fine, but good.

It is not good since physical agression is a failure of the parent - you need to resort to violence because you see no other way to discipline your kids.

Do I want to smack little fuckers once in a while? Sure. But then I calm down and start thinking how to actually make them change their behaviour, since contrary to what you and many others think of your childhood - it’s not the fear of spanking that made you not do things, by the time you were 15 your parents didn’t hit you but you didn’t fuck up, right?

 

[Ozzy Onya A2Z]

Except there are no laws, as indicated in the OP:


As all psychologists will tell you and supported by multitude studies - no physical violence against a child is “reasonable”, any physical punishment causes changes in the brain.

You want to hit someone hit someone your own size, not a human 1 meter tall.

There are laws already, as indicated and bolded in the OP; as well as the UK government ruling -

The government has rejected calls to ban physical punishment of children in England, saying they are already protected in law.

As for spanking it's a pretty useless technique once a toddler converses and understands reasoning. Better methods exist as they age. Before that I cannot say I agree zero spanking is 100% the answer but I wasn't born in the 2000s and beyond. Also I don't agree with your/generalised definition that spank equates to hit. We're not going to see eye to eye so no point hashing it out mate.

As for abusive parents we can all agree that's shite.

 

[cornonthecrobb]

I mean, what he did to you was abuse and even assault. Even back then you could have gotten him locked up for that.

that wasn't even the worst thing he did to be honest. I've a scar on my leg were he took a set keys to my thigh.

when I was seven my brother had an absence seizure and left the tap running in the bathroom. this flooded the bathroom... he then beat the fuck out of me for about 30 mins and threw my ps1 out the window..

he was a know.

 

[ChuckeRearmed]

People act as if beatings is something like breaking arms or throwing kids on the ground using judo moves.

While we should tackle abusive parents, some physical punishment should stay. In a free society, masochists are also humans. Otherwise they might never discover that kink.

 

[Spaceman292]

Were ALL you miserable fucks beaten when you were kids?

 

[GymWolf]

This is why youngsters today are a bunch of spoiled pricks.

Sometimes a smack is the only thing that a teenager understand.

 

[Tams]

Were ALL you miserable fucks beaten when you were kids?

Do consider a thick ear and a smack on the arse (not sexual) assault or abuse?

 

[GymWolf]

Were ALL you miserable fucks beaten when you were kids?

Yep, and we grew up better than the untouched shitheads we have today.

 

[AV]

Fuck them kids man

BBC and royal family already pretty good at this

 

[Ozzy Onya A2Z]

Were ALL you miserable fucks beaten when you were kids?

The real question is how many of us had shoes/thongs/wooden spoons hurled at us when we were out of arms length.

 

[GymWolf]

The real question is how many of us had shoes/thongs/wooden spoons hurled at us when we were out of arms length.

I got beaten with different broomsticks because my mom was hurting her hands with the classic smacks, but no one ever throw shoes at me, that's barbaric.

 

[Spaceman292]

Yep, and we grew up better than the untouched shitheads we have today.

(X) doubt

 

[GymWolf]

(X) doubt

Do you beat young boys, valdez?

 

[Tams]

(X) doubt

I can only speak for the UK, but youth behaviour is at an all time low.

And frankly, it's all because there's no discipline.

 

[Dr.Morris79]

Children are not the property of their parents, the parents are their legal guardians till the age of majority, as citizens it is the state's responsibility to look out for their well-being.

You can get fucked on both the bolded parts

 

[BlackTron]

Just ban them from having ipads, that'll teach em

Uh oh, ban the babysitter?

Again, all comes down to the competency of the parent.

 

[thefool]

Im fortunate my mom smacked me and my bros a couple of times. We were little devils with too much energy and sometimes the only way authority could be set was through some physical reprimand. This has nothing to do with abuse, which is already typified in most legal frameworks.

 

[Scotty W]

All beasts are driven to pasture by blows.

 

[Tams]

All beasts are driven to pasture by blows.

No, no, no! Don't you see?!

We have to ask the cows nicely to go to the next field. Perhaps sit for down tea and biscuits and have a talk and go into detail about their concerns over if the grass is really greener on they other side and that, no, we definitely aren't going to eat them.

 

[Ozzy Onya A2Z]

I got beaten with different broomsticks because my mom was hurting her hands with the classic smacks, but no one ever throw shoes at me, that's barbaric.

My brother used to sneak his hand down at the last moment and my mum broke a number of wooden spoons on him. I got in trouble a lot less than he did.

 

[GymWolf]

My brother used to sneak his hand down at the last moment and my mum broke a number of wooden spoons on him. I got in trouble a lot less than he did.

I had my share of brokeen broomsticks aswell

 

[AlteredForms]

 

[Cyberpunkd]

You can get fucked on both the bolded parts

Please, I would love to see you argue kids are your property.

 

[Dr.Morris79]

Please, I would love to see you argue kids are your property.

Well no, they arent property, that in itself is ridiculous..

But he is mine and the 'state' would have a hard time dictating to me their whims. I have a feeling any good parent would say the same

They'll be no drag time story hour here

And I wasnt being a badass, I just consider being a good parent is a basic.

 

[NeoLed]

For those concerned about discipline, instilling that into a child does not require physical punishment.

Not all human/kids act the same. Some need rough approach.

 

[Zathalus]

Not all human/kids act the same. Some need rough approach.

I, and science funnily enough, disagree.

 

[Dr. Claus]

I, and science funnily enough, disagree.

There are always outliers and averages don't account for everything.

Some kids deserve a proper spanking by their parents. Quite a few in this thread clearly do.

 

[NeoLed]

I, and science funnily enough, disagree.

Behavioral science is not an exact science. They're strangely fluid, changing every years or new study whatever

 

[Zathalus]

Behavioral science is not an exact science. They're strangely fluid, changing every years or new study whatever

The negative impact of physical punishment on children has been know for over 20 years now. It has been widely studied and agreed upon and hardly changes every year.

 

[Dr. Claus]

The negative impact of physical punishment on children has been know for over 20 years now. It has been widely studied and agreed upon and hardly changes every year.

Uh-huh. Sure Jan.

 

[Winter John]

My old man never hit us. I remember him saying it was because we'd take the beating and never learn from it. Instead what he did was ground us. When we got grounded we'd go to school, come home, have dinner and be sent straight to bed at 6pm. My mom would check we were actually in bed too. One time I was grounded for 3 weeks. I wasn't allowed to watch tv or read comics or put on the radio. I just lay in bed listening to all the other kids out playing. It was the worst. My old man was right though. If he'd given me a beating I would've forgotten all about it after a day or so. Now I do the same with my kid. Mostly just time outs in Little Bitch corner for actin up, but one time she got a week's lockdown for skipping class. She ain't missed a day since.

 

[Rayven_king]

Were ALL you miserable fucks beaten when you were kids?

yep had it at school and home

 

[Ironbunny]

Good slap hurts less in the long run.

 

[Trogdor1123]

I think people often confuse discipline with structure. Kids don’t need discipline usually, but they ALL need structure. Structure requires long term action and consistency. Lots of parents simply don’t do it. Parents want to be friends with their kids, not sources stability. Kids need parents, not adult friends.

 

[Synless]

Yes let's not think about the average parent that's Ill equipped with psychological discipline resulting in a positive manner.

Supposedly this government seems to trust their people to have a basic/general understanding of child psychology

And hey. If some good slaps or a beating doesn't do it just psychologically manipulate the child.

Your right, how did parents raise their children all these thousands of years?

I know what’s best for my kids, I don’t need the government stepping in for me, ever.

what’s clown world here is thinking the government knows best.

Note, I don’t touch my kids. I level with them and help them understand mistakes and ways to manage stress outside of lashing out. However I was raised getting slapped around when I messed up. I also was raised to learn from my mistakes as to not repeat them. I think there is a time and a place for it. I never condone full on abuse or over reaching physical harm.

 

[22:22:22]

Your right, how did parents raise their children all these thousands of years?

I know what’s best for my kids, I don’t need the government stepping in for me, ever.

what’s clown world here is thinking the government knows best.

Note, I don’t touch my kids. I level with them and help them understand mistakes and ways to manage stress outside of lashing out. However I was raised getting slapped around when I messed up. I also was raised to learn from my mistakes as to not repeat them. I think there is a time and a place for it. I never condone full on abuse or over reaching physical harm.

Good on you man.

But for you there are thousands that aren't able and don't posses the psychological means to raise their child through a myriad of reasons (mostly inherited and unbeknownst)

Again I'm no expert but if you deduct enough you'll get to the core of the relative inadequacy regarding parenting and children's behaviour.

It's to complex seeing the paradigm shift that has to take place doesn't solely cover this specific topic.


/rant

 

[Synless]

Good on you man.

But for you there are thousands that aren't able and don't posses the psychological means to raise their child through a myriad of reasons (mostly inherited and unbeknownst)

Again I'm no expert but if you deduct enough you'll get to the core of the relative inadequacy regarding parenting and children's behaviour.

It's to complex seeing the paradigm shift that has to take place doesn't solely cover this specific topic.


/rant

You don’t make a rule that affects the many for the few, you address the few and remove stigmas of people ignoring true child abuse they know is happening because “it’s not their place” to report.

Not a catch all, I’m suggesting one of many that should be tackled before laws come in to let the government parent for us.

 

[22:22:22]

You don’t make a rule that affects the many for the few, you address the few and remove stigmas of people ignoring true child abuse they know is happening because “it’s not their place” to report.

Not a catch all, I’m suggesting one of many that should be tackled before laws come in to let the government parent for us.

You're right from reasoning from within our current "reality context"

I'm talking about a massive overhaul of our society in general which is utopianism for sure. But I can't help it.

With that said, again I'm' with you. Respect and kind regards.

 

[NeoIkaruGAF]

I don’t like how people conflate smacking kids with extreme violence or anger. These people don’t have kids or know what discipline is.

Precisely.
I don’t think there’s many men in Italy who weren’t slapped or spanked a few times in their childhood. And if I have to be cynical about it, a few of them needed a bit more of that.
But. There’s a difference between the occasional slap/spanking when you’ve screwed up royally, and actual beatings. If one beats their child with punches or kicks, let alone sticks or belts or worse, yeah, that should be illegal. Getting the police involved for a slap, though, is excessive.

 

[GutsOfThor]

Good. Fuck them kids