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[Dynamite Ringo Matsuri]

how dare you insult master Seagal

He's no Geese Howard

 

[Jackben]

That's an angle I hadn't thought of. If you could manage to get into the water you might be able to drown it somehow.

Good luck getting the chimp to go into the water though.

 

[Calamari41]

A one hour old baby would have a better chance against the martial arts master than the martial arts master would have against the chimp.

 

[Metroid Killer]

So yeah, I think he's a joke all around

I've been training aikido for over 10 years and have been to japan for dedicated training a handful of times, many of those training under Isoyama sensei, the guy who taught Steven Seagal. He had this to say about him:

*Note: Isoyama Sensei is known for being notoriously cruel during training so often it would be wise go along somewhat when he was presenting techniques and stuff

'During a nikkyo[wrist pressure technique which you apply until opponent claps out] I had gotten him[Steven] down on the ground clapping and I stopped and looked him straight into the eyes and said You're a lousy actor!, and did the nikkyo with full force on him!

So yeah he's a big joke even in the world of aikido.

 

[Heel]

So yeah he's a big joke even in the world of aikido.

Oh yeah? One flick of the wrist and Sensei Seagal would have a chimpanzee on its hairy back pleading for mercy in chimp speak.

 

[flippedb]

Do chimps swim? I noticed in this video and the other the chimps won't go in the water. If so, your best chance is to head for water. Unless you can't swim yourself, then you're fucked.

They can't because they have little to no fat in their bodies. Fat makes you float, but they have a horrible time floating because of the amount of muscle and, I guess to some extent, their high bone density.

 

[Next]

I thought this was worth a thread revival haha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=udGAapx7Gok

 

[Salacious Crumb]

I thought this was worth a thread revival haha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=udGAapx7Gok

#teamchimp

 

[AllIsOneIsNone]

Haha, that man can tell a story.

 

[peaceiscloser]

What about a chimp vs. Jurassic Park-sized velociraptor

 

[Log4Girlz]

What about a chimp vs. Jurassic Park-sized velociraptor

A chimp would lose to that, or even to a lighter predator such as a leopard in most scenarios.

 

[peaceiscloser]

A chimp would lose to that, or even to a lighter predator such as a leopard in most scenarios.

Something that got me about the raptor though are those gangly arms. I know with the claws they'll rip through skin, but do they have that much arm strength?

Do any similar sized theropods have strong arms?

 

[Chinner]

chimp vs blame space vs timedog

 

[Log4Girlz]

chimp vs blame space vs timedog

chimp vs. space time vs. blame dog.

 

[Norml]

I thought this was worth a thread revival haha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=udGAapx7Gok

Good to hear the chimp got whooped

 

[DonMigs85]

What about average male chimp versus average female lowland gorilla?

 

[Next]

Good to hear the chimp got whooped

and he got free first blood too.

 

[iori9999]

Chimp vs Milo and Otis


Who would win? Or what about the director who reportedly killed about 30 Otises on set?

 

[casnix]

The chimp would wreck any human. Martial artist or not.

 

[commedieu]

Or what about the director who reportedly killed about 30 Otises on set?

....

gOOGLING RIGht now. this better not be true.. :\

edit:

oh my god.