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[dab0ne]

https://youtu.be/9Z1Hl67fNt0

Flintstones theme

 

[StayDead]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uL2HZkAfiI

Johnny Tight Lips, can you see the shooter?

I see a lot of things.

 

[Tambini]

 

[minor effort]

Marge: Why do you have so many bowling balls?

Homer: Ah, I'm not gonna lie to you, Marge. So long. [leaves]

 

[Glass Shark]

My son is also named Bort.

 

[DamnBoxes]

Damn Boxes!

 

[Ristifer]

just remembered another

This one gets me every single time. Also love how the woman on stage extends her arm to guide Moe to the bottom of the stairs.

 

[DonShula]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uL2HZkAfiI

Johnny Tight Lips, can you see the shooter?

I see a lot of things.

Underrated.

 

[iamdarkcloud]

 

[snacknuts]

Ralph's audition for Fallout Boy (video is 0:09)

 

[Altazor]

so many good ones, but one of my absolute favorites that I haven't seen mentioned yet.

"ONLY *WHO* CAN PREVENT FOREST FIRES?"
"you pressed YOU, referring to ME. That is incorrect. The correct answer is YOU"

the wordplay is fucking genius.

 

[Exterminieren]

"My Homer is not a Communist! He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is NOT a porn star!"

In terms of visual slapstick gags, I cried laughing at Shary Bobbins being hit by the plane at the end of her episode.

 

[NealMcCauley]

This one has always cracked me up despite (or because of) how fucking dark it is:

(From "The Computer Wore Menace Shoes:" Homer won the Pulitzer as anonymous blogger/reporter Mr. X, but he had to reveal his identity or else the cash prize would go to feed starving children)

Marge: I'm glad you won the Pulitzer,-
Homer: Finally.
Marge: -but I do feel bad about the starving children.
Homer: They're with God now.
Marge: Oh well that's good. Oh...

 

[gibut]

 

[Daniel Jackson]

 

[Gen X]

One that always comes to mind is when Homer designs that mascot Springy and one gets stuck I'm Moe and Lennys eyelid.

 

[Piers]

It's not up there with the best but this is also my personal favourite from Radio Bart
Homer: That Timmy is a real hero.
Lisa: What do you mean?
Homer: He fell down a well and...he can't get out.
Lisa: How does that make him a hero?
Homer: Well it's more than you ever did!

 

[NinjaCoachZ]

It's a visual gag, but it kills me every time I see it:

"Mr. Scorpio, can I have some sugar?"
"Sugar? Sure. *pulls fistfulls of sugar out of his pockets* Sorry, I don't have any packets. Want some cream?"

 

[avengers23]

We're this deep and no one's mentioned

 

[ultron87]

Homer building a barbecue pit is my favorite. A bunch of great jokes strung together.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmMCbTAmFI8

"Le grille!? What the hell is that?!"

"Why must I fail every attempt at masonry!?"

 

[BobJustBob]

 

[MilkyJoe]

Dogs of Death

Mr Burns : Ah, yes. I'll never forget the day he bagged his first hippie. That young man didn't think it was too 'groovy'.

 

[JetBlackPanda]

this is way to hard to choose but this one gets me every single time.

Burns: Yes, I'd like to send this letter to the Prussian consulate in Siam by aeromail. Am I too late for the 4:30 autogyro?

Post Office Employee: Uh, I better look in the manual. This book must be out of date: I don't see ”Prussia", ”Siam", or ”autogyro".

Burns: Well, keep looking!

 

[Rhomega Beta]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uL2HZkAfiI

Johnny Tight Lips, can you see the shooter?

I see a lot of things.

"Johnny, where did they shoot you?"
"I ain't sayin' nothin'."
"Then what do I tell your doctor?"
"Tell him to go suck a lemon!"

 

[Ethelwulf]

I don't have just one. This one crosses my mind though:

-number eight
-bruuup.

 

[Krypta]

"Johnny, where did they shoot you?"
"I ain't sayin' nothin'."
"Then what do I tell your doctor?"
"Tell him to go suck a lemon!"

Did you have a nice flight, Johnny Tightlips?
I ain't sayin' nothin'!
I understand. How is your mother?
Oh, hey... who says I got a mother?!

 

[Snacks the sober sea lion]

LOOK CLOSER, LENNY

 

[jennetics]

Homer: I'd like the phone book for Hokkaido Japan, please.
Librarian: OK, here you go, the phone book for Hokkaido Japan.
Homer: Thank you. May I please use your phone?
Librarian: Isss it a local call?
Homer: ...Yes.

 

[Randam]

So many post classic episodes "jokes"..



The one I first thought of:

MARGE
Homer, it's 2am. What happened?
HOMER
It was an alien, Marge! It appeared in front of me and said, "Don't be afraid"!
MARGE
Have you been drinking?
HOMER
No! Well, ten beers.
MARGE
Hmmm...

 

[samoscratch]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtEFEdrrXc4

 

[elrechazado]

Antoine Bugleboy.

--

Never, Marge. Never. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors - oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"

The undisputed champion

 

[LostCaress]

”Oh, no Jasper, they may say she died of a burst ventricle, but I know she died of a broken heart." – Abe ”Grampa" Simpson

 

[PdotMichael]

The undisputed champion

There is still Homer's Chinatown monologue

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2GBloYQ36A

 

[Ogodei]

Homer: I’d like the phone book for Hokkaido Japan, please.
Librarian: OK, here you go, the phone book for Hokkaido Japan.
Homer: Thank you. May I please use your phone?
Librarian: Isss it a local call?
Homer: …Yes.

A second or two later it gets better, as the librarian bolts for some reason.

 

[PSqueak]

S20E11: How The Test Was Won

Spoiler

It's actually just Homer's daydream

Marge: I got us tickets to the ballet.
Homer: The ballet? Woo-hoo!
Marge: You like ballet?
Homer: Marjorie please, I enjoy all the meats of our cultural stew. Ah ballet.

I love homer logic jokes, one of my fave ones is when he is thinking of finding a friend for marge, and goes like "she has to be cute, athletic and with an infectious laugh", then procceeds to imagine marge friends in the form of a dolphin he is playing with at an aquarium, just to have marge show up and say "my husband and my best friend!" and harpoon them both.

There is a beat and then homer goes "I'll have to take that risk."

"Bart. I don't wanna alarm you, but there may be a boogey man or boogey men in the house."

This one is legendary.


As for one of my faves:

"Hi it's me again, I got another problem. Uh, this one's about my cat..."

[Angry meowing in the background]

"SHUT UP I AM ASKING HER!!"

 

[Son Of D]

The way Homer's smile just gets bigger always gets me. And then afterwards:

"Hey, he looks just like you, Poindexter."

 

[HyperZone<3]

For sneaky funny, I always liked when Ned went crazy and he and the doctor were watching a video of him as a bratty kid. He was running around smacking other kids, going, 'I'm Dick Tracy, take that Prune Face! Now I'm Prune Face! Take that Dick Tracy! Now I'm Prune Tracy! Take that Dick--' then it cuts off. Blew my mind.

Wow! I never got that before. That's great.

 

[akileese]

This is another favorite of mine:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mOCvylOLQVs

"Financial Panther eh........?"

 

[Phox]

Carl- Black
Lenny - white

 

[The Real Abed]

Hank: You will notice, my new best friend, that we are very casual around here.
Homer: Yes, sir, I will notice that. Very casual, Mr. Scorpion.
Hank: Don't call me Mr. Scorpion, it's Scorpio, but don't came me that either. Call me Hank!

That whole episode is just full of amazing moments.

 

[capitalCORN]

Another one. I don't know if it's been posted yet or not....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UYNEu6v6AE

 

[The Real Abed]

Another one. I don't know if it's been posted yet or not....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UYNEu6v6AE

First page. But you can never have too much of this.

 

[PSqueak]

For sneaky funny, I always liked when Ned went crazy and he and the doctor were watching a video of him as a bratty kid. He was running around smacking other kids, going, 'I'm Dick Tracy, take that Prune Face! Now I'm Prune Face! Take that Dick Tracy! Now I'm Prune Tracy! Take that Dick--' then it cuts off. Blew my mind.

Getting this one as a kid from hearing the mexican dub made me feel incredibly smart, specially because the joke doesn't work in spanish, yet i was able to deduct it.

 

[Bumhead]

"Uncross those eyes, mister!"

"But I can't!"

Combination of the above image and his voice kills me every time.

The funniest moment from arguably the best episode.

 

[Ristifer]

Not sure if it's been posted or not, but I've always loved this scene:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6YSvA_9k5U

 

[TeamLeftMatch]

We're this deep and no one's mentioned

This scene gets me as well

 

[BenjaminBirdie]

"Mr. Scorpio, can I have some sugar?"
"Sugar? Sure. *pulls fistfulls of sugar out of his pockets* Sorry, I don't have any packets. Want some cream?"

Thank you. My actual favorite.

Runner up from that episode:

tap
tap
tap
tap
WHAP
"WARREN!"

 

[The Ummah]

"MUCKLUCK!"

 

[Mugy]

The simpsons made politicals so freakin good man:

 

[Strangelove77]

Is it politically incorrect nowadays to laugh at the gay steel mill part?
Cuz I still think it's funny.