Support NeoGAF

[astroturfing]

Right there with you, OP.

After 5 months of part-time retail, I just landed a nice paying job ($550 a week) and could finally support myself. Was doing well at the job, heard nothing but good words from my trainers, supervisor, even one of the owners. Then last Tuesday I got a call saying, "Yeah, don't come in tomorrow. You're not needed anymore, your contract has been terminated. Thank you."

Now I have to pay rent, car payment, food, utilities, etc. and I only have $1200. I'll get some help from my mom, but if I can't find anything soon I'm screwed in about 2 months, maybe even 1.

And just last month I had my heart broken into a billion pieces as well, so fuck me, right?

shit man.. thats rough, really rough. i swear, if i ever become a millionaire i'll track you down and send you minimum $5000, RyanardoDaVinci.

Are there no open positions at the hospital? Check job listings and see if there is another department you could work. They may prefer someone who already has experience with the location and staff.

this is a possibility, there might be openings at some point among the personnel who transport food etc around the hospital complex (it's a gigantic place with tunnels etc, and i know every place like the back of my hand). thanks for reminding me. that job would be hella boring compared to transporting patients though, lol.

Sucks man. Got to do your best to keep your head up, even if you gotta fake it. Keep your relationship in tact as best you can. I recently lost pretty much everything when my condo went up in flames last week (I'm a complete dipshit moron, no renters insurance), I'm a wreck but I'd be totally lost and miserable without my girl friend.

shit. why are some of us so damn unlucky? and i'm embarrassed to admit but i'm a dipshit moron as well, because guess what.. i could have a joined a union, and they'd be paying me soon. for like the first two years i actually thought the union wouldn't take temp workers, but apparently they do. i learned that, but still didn't join. i was 100% certain i wouldnt need to, that my employment would continue, i actually thought a good work ethic and doing a little extra every day would ensure i wouldn't be suddenly let go of..

 

[Davidion]

Hey man, it's ok to feel bad and cry. But it's more important to take that excellent experience you have and go hurl it into the world and start looking.

Definitely listen to others and save, but you need to get your own confidence shored up. You're in a much better position, and much better, than you realize.

Get to it, young man.

- A dude who upended his whole work life at your age and ended up in a much better place than before.

 

[johnny956]

Are there other hospitals in the area? Apply for them, those jobs seem to be always hiring. Tonight, your GF will hopefully be there for you but tomorrow get the resume cleaned up and start applying.

Getting a recommendation from your former boss does go a long way if you can get it

 

[Red]

shit man.. thats rough, really rough. i swear, if i ever become a millionaire i'll track you down and send you minimum $5000, RyanardoDaVinci.



this is a possibility, there might be openings at some point among the personnel who transport food etc around the hospital complex (it's a gigantic place with tunnels etc, and i know every place like the back of my hand). thanks for reminding me. that job would be hella boring compared to transporting patients though, lol.



shit. why are some of us so damn unlucky? and i'm embarrassed to admit but i'm a dipshit moron as well, because guess what.. i could have a joined a union, and they'd be paying me soon. for like the first two years i actually thought the union wouldn't take temp workers, but apparently they do. i learned that, but still didn't join. i was 100% certain i wouldnt need to, that my employment would continue, i actually thought a good work ethic and doing a little extra every day would ensure i wouldn't be suddenly let go of..

Hospitals often like to hire from within. If you can get another job, you may be able to transfer to a better department once a better position opens.

 

[SoRuffShoNuff]

shit man.. thats rough, really rough. i swear, if i ever become a millionaire i'll track you down and send you minimum $5000, RyanardoDaVinci.



this is a possibility, there might be openings at some point among the personnel who transport food etc around the hospital complex (it's a gigantic place with tunnels etc, and i know every place like the back of my hand). thanks for reminding me. that job would be hella boring compared to transporting patients though, lol.



shit. why are some of us so damn unlucky? and i'm embarrassed to admit but i'm a dipshit moron as well, because guess what.. i could have a joined a union, and they'd be paying me soon. for like the first two years i actually thought the union wouldn't take temp workers, but apparently they do. i learned that, but still didn't join. i was 100% certain i wouldnt need to, that my employment would continue, i actually thought a good work ethic and doing a little extra every day would ensure i wouldn't be suddenly let go of..

Were the other associates they kept part of the union?

 

[FrontalMonk]

This is really rough, OP. I truly sympathize with you. I've had a bunch of different jobs, and I've been fired twice. The firing is the absolute worst. The first time I got canned I was escorted out of the building and I was a crying mess. I got into my car and cried, I called my girlfriend (now wife) and cried, I went to our apartment and cried, and the next day I got back to it because I was all cried out and I needed to make shit happen. The second time I got fired I did the same thing.

The advice in this thread is really sound. Give yourself one day of mourning, get as much of it out of your system as you possibly can, then tomorrow get out there and seize the day. Clean up your CV, put in applications, work on yourself as much as you can and hopefully you'll get back on your feet quickly.

 

[br3wnor]

The good news is you were making $1,400 a month which I'm assuming is a job in the 9-12EU an hour range?

I don't know the economics of jobs in your country, but if you can find something full time in retail or a lower level service job, I'm assuming it'll be close to the same pay. You should start looking for a new job right away, whatever you can get I would take while you try to make longer term plans. It's the holiday season so you could probably even get something even seasonal to float you a couple months.

 

[Crayon]

Astroturfing!!

We love you! Most of us have felt a depth of despair and it's hell. Hell on earth. You will never be quite the same but you will go on! You are equipped to make it through this.

 

[ZackieChan]

yeah no savings, money has all gone to rent and food (and a videogame or two of course). that's why i'm panicking, i'll be completely broke real fast and it's frightening.. the idea of selling any of my stuff is unacceptable to me. i worked hard to be able to afford my new TV and ps4, no way i'm selling them! i need entertainment to keep me sane, now especially.

i was also a kind of temp worker (best i could do without a real education), so i won't get any real unemployment money, just minimal government assistance which isn't much at all, maybe pays half my rent.

talked with the gf.. she took it much better than me hah. she seems strong. but i'm still hopeless, we will have some SERIOUS troubles and i feel incapacitated by despair.. i've never been good with this stuff, i honestly can't even make a proper CV!

thanks for the replies, just what i needed mostly. i do need to pick myself up and at least do something. i'll try to finish the remaining work days without losing my shit, leaving gracefully (boss said there's still a chance they could take me back at some point..).

it's just that.. i'm the kind or person who gets REALLY attached to things, i can't even imagine working anywhere else. our break room felt like another home, co-workers felt like brothers.. feels literally impossible to let all that go so suddenly.

I love how "a videogame or two" becomes a brand new TV and PS4. That's like a month's wages. So you're crying, but you won't ever sell things? You need to straighten out your priorities. Sorry if this is harsh, but that's ridiculous.

 

[norm9]

I love how "a videogame or two" becomes a brand new TV and PS4. That's like a month's wages. So you're crying, but you won't ever sell things? You need to straighten out your priorities. Sorry if this is harsh, but that's ridiculous.

Yeah, if you have no money, tv and ps4 needs to be sold first.

Feel free to be sad today. Go out and handle your business tomorrow.

 

[Deleted member 1235]

Sorry to hear your bad news. Life totally sucks sometimes. It's not fair, and it's not fun, but that's the way it is. Getting laid off is a fact of life, and it's oftentimes done for economic reasons that have very little to do with your job performance; so don't take it personally.

You have every right to be upset, go ahead and own those feelings. But don't stay there forever. Use that energy (the frustration, the anger) towards productive ends.

1. Examine your expenses. Get a handle on everything you're spending right now. Determine if your expenses are required (i.e., place to live, food, etc) or whether they can be pared back (TV, phone plans, internet, eating fast food).

2. Start cutting back on expenses. One of your main goals should be to make your money last as long as possible.

3. Are you eligible for unemployment? If so, apply for it ASAP.

4. Start looking for another job. Can you network with your supervisor (who seems to like you) to try to find another position at the hospital? You already have a lot of contacts there so maybe someone knows of an opening.

5. Expand your job search - this is not the time to be too picky about what you do, because you need something that pays money.

I have found a lot of the advice over at the personal finance reddit is pretty reasonable (www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance). If you post your issue there you will likely get a lot of advice.

Good luck to you.

this person understands exactly how unemployment services should work and how you should behave while you are using them. Follow all of this advice.

Point 4 is particularly important. 'it's not what you know, it's who you know' is a particularly irritating and particularly correct statement.

chin up and get on with it. you'll be fine.

 

[astroturfing]

I love how "a videogame or two" becomes a brand new TV and PS4. That's like a month's wages. So you're crying, but you won't ever sell things? You need to straighten out your priorities. Sorry if this is harsh, but that's ridiculous.

videogames are essential for my mental health, no joke. it's been my hobby for almost 30 years.. i don't think it's ridiculous to not want to give up something i love and the main thing i can use to de-stress myself (stress kills remember). i mean what the fuck is even the point of living if you can't enjoy things? of course if shit got so serious that i really had to choose between living on the streets or selling my videogames then yeah, i'd sell them.. but that's not a realistic scenario.

 

[CitizenVectron]

videogames are essential for my mental health, no joke. it's been my hobby for almost 30 years.. i don't think it's ridiculous to not want to give up something i love and the main thing i can use to de-stress myself (stress kills remember). i mean what the fuck is even the point of living if you can't enjoy things? of course if shit got so serious that i really had to choose between living on the streets or selling my videogames then yeah, i'd sell them.. but that's not a realistic scenario.

You can't have your cake and eat it too. Yes, you enjoy games. But if you are homeless you can't play games. Hardship means making hard decisions, and you have to do that now. You can always buy new games or new TVs in the future.

Why isn't living on the streets realistic? Do you have a plan to prevent it? Asking us for advice doesn't count; Start working on one now. If you can't find a job or a really cheap place to rent soon, then it could happen. I'm not saying this to be harsh, but you need to take this situation seriously. No one expects to end up homeless or alone.

It's unrealistic to expect us to come up with solutions for you when you are not willing to make any sacrifices at all to protect your future.

 

[ZackieChan]

videogames are essential for my mental health, no joke. it's been my hobby for almost 30 years.. i don't think it's ridiculous to not want to give up something i love and the main thing i can use to de-stress myself (stress kills remember). i mean what the fuck is even the point of living if you can't enjoy things? of course if shit got so serious that i really had to choose between living on the streets or selling my videogames then yeah, i'd sell them.. but that's not a realistic scenario.

So you're going to live with parents or something? Because it doesn't sound like living on the streets is part of your plan.

You can always downsize and play old video games. You don't need the latest and greatest to be able to play games.

 

[nailbombxx]

That's awful brother but you have experience. Hospitals hire very often and hopefully you should be able to find another job without much delay.

 

[Dipper145]

Why would you assume someone earning €1,400 a month providing for 2 adults has the ability to save a significant sum of money? That's a dangerous assumption to be making when living pay check to pay check is a reality for many people. The situation OP is really difficult and you think its ok to say "oh you've got 4 years of savings, you'll be grand" is either shockingly naieve or annoyingly sarcastic.

OP, take a day or two to process this change. Consider asking friends and family for help looking for work. Don't assume no one would be willing to help you out. Same goes for organisations whose purpose is to help people find work. By all means continue to look on your own too. If you are in any way close to your family they should be understanding of your situation. It will be easy to feel shameful asking for help but just remember that asking for help is never shameful.

I apologize I must have missed the part about wage earnings when I read initially. I do feel bad now. I can definitely understand the worrying, but given that this person now has 4 years of experience in the field it will be easier to find a job that will likely pay more money than the original job. Switching jobs every so often for wage increases is generally a good idea income wise anyway so it might work out for the best in the long run.

On top of that he talked about having a good relationship with his boss and thus probably has an excellent recommendation and access to a network to find another position somewhere else.

Don't be afraid to turn to family in times fo financial worries, you'll be back on your feet in no time I'd bet.

 

[kmfdmpig]

Two key things to remember:

1) There are a lot of charity groups/people that will assist you in creating a good CV or resume. Find one and work with them to create a good resume. That will be time well-spent.

2) You talked about the potential that your old employer would rehire. Do not wait around for that to happen. If it happens, then great, but don't assume it will. Once you get your resume sorted apply for many jobs. Finding a job if tough, but if your resume is solid you want to make sure you're applying for a lot of opportunities.

 

[Vampirolol]

All I can say is that you sound like an awesome, very strong person, and I'm sure you'll recover from this.

 

[ClosingADoor]

You're in the Eurozone I take it? 1400 a month, so Western Europe?

If you get fired, don't you get unemployment paid for the next months. Not the same as your salary, but should be something to keep you going.

Edit: Your profile says Finland. Since you had a job before, you get 703 a month in unemployment benefits from a quick search. Get on that and claim it right away.

 

[Gemüsepizza]

I love how "a videogame or two" becomes a brand new TV and PS4. That's like a month's wages. So you're crying, but you won't ever sell things? You need to straighten out your priorities. Sorry if this is harsh, but that's ridiculous.

Yes, and the next step is selling his fridge. Then he needs to pull himself up by his damn bootstraps and go get a job!! Good god, his TV is probably even a flat-screen TV!!1

Spoiler

/s

..

His PS4 and TV are probably not worth much. Also, it's dumb to sell things which have lost a lot of value compared to when he bought them. And you haven't been poor before, have you? We need stuff like that to take part in society.

 

[ZackieChan]

Yes, and the next step is selling his fridge. Then he needs to pull himself up by his damn bootstraps and go get a job!! Good god, his TV is probably even a flat-screen TV!!1

Spoiler

/s

..

His PS4 and TV are probably not worth much. Also, it's dumb to sell things which have lost a lot of value compared to when he bought them. And you haven't been poor before, have you? We need stuff like that to take part in society.

Yes, I've been so poor I was searching for change to eat/get gas. So poor I've sold off my guitars/games/everything I could to get money. So don't lecture me. We don't need fucking fancy TVs and PS4s to "take part in society." What the hell are you talking about?

 

[Gemüsepizza]

Yes, I've been so poor I was searching for change to eat/get gas. So poor I've sold off my guitars/games/everything I could to get money. So don't lecture me. We don't need fucking fancy TVs and PS4s to "take part in society." What the hell are you talking about?

A shitty PS4 and a shitty TV isn't "fancy". Poor/unemployed people need stuff like that to not go insane. What are they supposed to do, look at the wall the whole day? A few bucks he would get from selling his PS4 will very likely not radically change or save his life. But keeping it could save his life. I know what I am talking about, too. I have been poor in the past, for years. If I didn't had a way to escape from my problems for a few hours, or a way to make friends through a shared hobby, maybe I wouldn't even be around anymore. And again, selling stuff like that, on which you very likely make a big loss, is not a good idea if you want to build at least some kind of wealth. It's a much better idea to try to get money by other means.

 

[ClosingADoor]

A shitty PS4 and a shitty TV isn't "fancy". Poor/unemployed people need stuff like that to not go insane. What are they supposed to do, look at the wall the whole day? A few bucks he would get from selling his PS4 will very likely not radically change or save his life. But keeping it could save his life. I know what I am talking about, too. I have been poor in the past, for years. If I didn't had a way to escape from my problems for a few hours, or a way to make friends through a shared hobby, maybe I wouldn't even be around anymore. And again, selling stuff like that, on which you very likely make a big loss, is not a good idea if you want to build at least some kind of wealth. It's a much better idea to try to get money by other means.

Of course it is better to get money by other means. But if the alternative is no food or the lights going out, then a PS4 is "fancy" in that situation and should not be off the tables for selling to get money. A PS4 and tv is not a requirement at that time. Luckily the OP is not in such a situation yet. He should get his unemployment benefits and look around for some kind of work as soon as he can.

 

[ZackieChan]

Your false choice between the latest game system and staring at the wall as the only entertainment options is ludicrous.

If he wants to build wealth, he shouldn't be spending his free time playing games, anyway.

 

[komplanen]

I feel really bad for you, OP, I genuinely do. I just wanted to try and answer your question. I hope you don't take this as an insult.

---

what pisses me off is that many others who have been there for much less time and who i've actually trained, get to stay.. i just don't fucking get it :/

Could be because...

i'm laying here in my bed crying my eyes out

i had a long emotional talk with my bos

my life's been a total mess

i failed uni 3 times

motivation problems

chronic pain

hard to concentrate and learn

i've only recently started to recover mentally

birthday party in a week or two, i can't handle it.. i will ruin it by being a depressed hopeless broken little man

she doesnt get as depressed as i am

... maybe some of that spilled into your work? I mean you say you were recently awarded for being good, but maybe you just weren't picking up the signals that you were sending. Maybe you spoke too openly about things and made people feel uncomfortable? I'm not sayig that's your fault per se, but I've seen this happen.

I really don't know if that's what happened, but maybe it gives you a little solace because all of those things can be fixed, if you work on them.

i need some encouraging words :/

I'm pretty much like you in many ways. Just keep working hard to get a job and try a lower level of education than University for your concentration problems. I'm currently studying in a University of Applied Sciences (in Finland that's below a University) and I can tell you that the sad bag of negativity that I was when I came here is now mostly a distant memory. After I get a job I am going to apply into a real proper University and I think I can do it because I learned so much about studying here. I'm 33 and literally spent my 20's being depressed and lonely.

EDIT: You're in Finland? Apply to 'Ammattikorkeakoulu' instead of University, it's much easier and you'll get a good start on your career. There's plenty of options to choose from and some of them are pretty chill. And I don't want to start a fight but in Finland two adults can perfectly well live together with just their student benefits. If you can't, then you have something wrong with your lifestyle and need to adjust.

 

[junpei]

videogames are essential for my mental health, no joke. it's been my hobby for almost 30 years.. i don't think it's ridiculous to not want to give up something i love and the main thing i can use to de-stress myself (stress kills remember). i mean what the fuck is even the point of living if you can't enjoy things? of course if shit got so serious that i really had to choose between living on the streets or selling my videogames then yeah, i'd sell them.. but that's not a realistic scenario.

if selling them is to hard then try to Pawn your valuables . that give you a chance to get them back if you cant get back on your feet quickly .

 

[Nester99]

Take heed to the wisdom of komplanen.....

 

[Vigilant Walrus]

You've supported yourself and your girlfriend. You didn't lost your job on purpose or to fuck with her or anybody else.

What you need to do now is think about what you stand to lose if you don't make some moves now. If you give into depression and go "deer in headlines" you really will stand still. You have a opportunity right now to salvage this.


You break down all your costs and expenses between you and your girlfriend.

< Rent
< Utilities
< Heat, Electricity, Water
< Transportation

Everything else you cancel. Right now. And you call your bank and energy company in advance and explain if you can get a longer pay date. Some companies will allow you to reschedule your pay dates.
You talk to your bank and explain that you're about to hit zero- Some banks will allow you to be in minus if you have a good reason.

Contact your parents, and your girlfriends parents and explain things and ask for food budget. If you are gonna live off canned tuna, baked beans and shit like that, that's what you'll have to do. There are some good reddits for advice on how to eat for no money at all- I think they are called /frugal but there are others.



Listen- It's a job, and you can find another. You owe it to yourself to find another job. You owe it to yourself to not put your job on a pedestal. Trust me- I've been infatuated with a perfect career job, and once I quit to pursue school again, I endlessly regretted it.
But there is nothing productive that comes from that.
There are other hospitals, there are other places, and it is possible for you to take your expertise into other areas. What about working with the elderly, the mentally ill, the handicapped- Look at all the jobs where your 4 year expertise might come in. You can find another job and rebounce from this.
The best advice I can give you is to hit the ground running. If you stop and feel the pain, it will make it so much harder to pick yourself up. Don't stop- Don't stop and breathe. Immediately put all emergency breaks on, and use the combined resources of yourself and your girlfriend to keep your apartment and rebounce from this. Families, friends, and what other stop gaps you can.

Avoid payday loans. Don't go down this route unless you literally have no other choice.

 

[edbrat]

Hang in there OP, we're all rooting for you.

You've had a lot of good advice already. I'll only add that from your perspective right now it might seem like an overwhelming amount of stuff to do. Make lists, prioritise, break up what you need to do in bite size chunks.

When shit hits the fan and destroys you and all seems hopeless, remember what Winston Churchill said

"When you're going through hell, keep going"

...and post here so we know you're ok. Good luck OP.

 

[Mikey Jr.]

Go to a factory and work?

That's what I do between jobs. I don't understand the OP to be honest. If your willing to get your hands dirty, there is plenty of work I'm sure. And you'll make more than 1400 a month.

 

[crimzonflame]

You could go to the library and read a book/browse GAF if you're desperate for entertainment after selling your belongings .

 

[Tom Penny]

You can't change what already happened. Focus on what you want going forward. You cannot bring positivity into your life feeling bad and negative. It will just multiple since you become what you focus on. That is universal law. Think of things you are grateful for and go from there. Good luck.

 

[Water]

I'm pretty much like you in many ways. Just keep working hard to get a job and try a lower level of education than University for your concentration problems.

Yep, if you want to reach a challenging job or level of studies, it's much better to build your capacity towards it in manageable steps than just bang your head into a wall. Letting yourself fail repeatedly actually makes learning harder due to the negative associations and anxiety. There's no shame in backing up and rethinking your approach or changing goals, it's the only reasonable thing to do when things aren't working.

It's also important to remember that any particular level of education is not a prerequisite for a happy life. Don't think you have to finish a degree that you've started - whatever time you've spent on it is sunk cost. Make your choices based on what you actually want, what can actually get you there, and a realistic assessment of what your own current condition and capacity is - not what it "should be at this point" or other imaginary benchmark.

I have multiple students who have tried academic education and it didn't work for them for whatever reason, concentration difficulties, averse to theory in a vacuum, depression etc. but have done really great work in my study program. (It's an intensive one-year game development thing in Helsinki.) At the same time, there are a lot of people for whom this environment would clearly be a bad fit (eg. need a more rigid structure than what I offer) so I do them and everybody else a favor by not letting them in. One size doesn't fit all.

in Finland two adults can perfectly well live together with just their student benefits. If you can't, then you have something wrong with your lifestyle and need to adjust.

Also yep. I'm not so sure student benefits alone are enough to live "perfectly well", but they should pretty much cover your living expenses and food especially with the subsidized lunches students get. Any small part-time work you could land (doing whatever a couple nights a week) pushes it into comfortable long-term survival territory. And if you are on general social support ("toimeentulotuki") or unemployment benefits, I think you get a decent bit more benefits than students do.