• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.

NEOGAF EXCLUSIVE : I wet my noodle this week-end ! AMA (and we can talk polyamorous relationship while we're at it)

Will this polyamorous relationship destroy my ego and leave me a husk of myself ?

  • Yes

    Votes: 80 74.1%
  • No

    Votes: 4 3.7%
  • Maybe

    Votes: 13 12.0%
  • Cannot be worst than your last breakup

    Votes: 11 10.2%

  • Total voters
    108
Status
Not open for further replies.

GHG

Member
"I'm polyamorous" + "unprotected" = trap

Good Girls GIF by NBC
 

Toots

Gold Member
"I'm polyamorous" + "unprotected" = trap

Good Girls GIF by NBC
A trap like "i'll get pregnant and ask for child support"?
I wish she makes a lot more than me...
Did you put your thumb in her butthole?
Don't cuff her for god sake
I did not this time but i'm planning to of course.
I think we'll need to get a bit more confortable before ass play. She seems to have one of those extremely tight butthole, like princesses do.
I will have fun with her as long as she wants to have fun with me or as long as don't get bored, but i don't intend to being trapped.
 

Toots

Gold Member
By the way God bless the kind soul who voted "NO" to the poll.
I hope your kindness and optimism is repaid to you tenfold :messenger_blowing_kiss:
(and also that you wet your noodle with someone you find as beautiful as i find this gal)
 

Alebrije

Member
OP this will be your new best friend and will have a better and longer relathionship with it than your current crush..

Zithromax-Azithromycin-500mg.jpg
 

Toots

Gold Member
Oh wow, congratulations! This thread has just achieved the impossible. I thought I'd hit rock bottom when I accidentally watched "Sharknado 5," but no, this thread comes along and redefines my concept of cringe. Really, hats off!

I mean, if I'd known I was going to stumble upon such a unique blend of awkwardness, I would've prepped some popcorn and maybe invited a couple of friends over for the spectacle. But alas, I was woefully unprepared for the sheer, transcendent level of discomfort this thread has blessed my eyes with.

Reading through it feels like I've taken a first-class trip into a parallel universe where up is down, left is right, and people think pineapple belongs on pizza. The comments here – it's like a poetry slam in a world where 'cringe' is the highest form of art.

I’m laughing, I'm crying, I'm questioning the fabric of reality – and that's just from the first few posts. I never knew reading something could feel like I’m doing yoga with my brain, contorting it into positions it was never meant to endure.

And can we just take a moment to appreciate the sheer stamina it must have taken to maintain this level of cringe from post to post? It’s like running a marathon, except instead of being cheered on by the crowd, they're all wondering how you're still upright and haven't collapsed from sheer embarrassment.

So kudos, my dear cringe Olympians. You have set a new world record in the sport of vicarious embarrassment, and I am both horrified and mildly impressed. Keep up the 'good' work. Can't wait to see what fresh horrors the next thread brings! I'll bring the popcorn.
I'm happy that my purposefully over the top and dumb thread brought you such vivid emotions.
Yours made me feel like when the fedora sporting dude who has no friends starts telling you how sophisticated he is compared to others, and how everyone else is cringe... ie a bit embarassed for you. And like in highschool, i'll be in the group of those who have fun and wet their noodles while the fedora sporting dudes won't.
Just have fun dude don't judge, what are you a goddam 90's soccer mom ?
Waiting for the plot twist:
Toots gave HER the STD
You might really be on to something here :messenger_tears_of_joy:
 
You’re chittering like a lovestruck schoolboy, so just realize that you’re already fucked and just buzzing on those love chemicals that are controlling your brain. Congrats on the good, good fuckin though, you gonna be cool when she finds a new stud? It’s hard to watch when you’ve been there yourself, but who knows it could turn into something more. I just think the upfront advertisement of “polyamorous” is a pretty big clue it’s not meant to last, so set your expectations accordingly.
 

IntentionalPun

Ask me about my wife's perfect butthole
Wild sexual encounters are one of the spices of life.

Congrats.

They aren't the end all be all but unfortunately I'm addicted to them. Has made for some great memories/stories but I've also blown my entire life up more than once over them.

Oh well, on to the next one!
 
One of my Ex-gfs was like this. Though she said (while we were together) that she only checked other guys out and would never cheat on me, she definitely had another guy(s) in the wings for when she was done with me and over the honeymoon phase.

Some bitches chase that dragon, so I guess in your case at least the silver lining is she’s upfront about it, but it’s not gonna last. Sorry bro. You’re just another body for the count, and getting attached at all will hit you in the feels later even if you’re telling yourself now that it won’t.
 

Toots

Gold Member
You’re chittering like a lovestruck schoolboy, so just realize that you’re already fucked and just buzzing on those love chemicals that are controlling your brain. Congrats on the good, good fuckin though, you gonna be cool when she finds a new stud? It’s hard to watch when you’ve been there yourself, but who knows it could turn into something more. I just think the upfront advertisement of “polyamorous” is a pretty big clue it’s not meant to last, so set your expectations accordingly.
I'm sure it will make me sad if she doesn't want to see me anymore (or not as much as we do), be it because a stud or anything else, but i'm sure i'll manage.
I do feel like a lovestruck schoolboy, but i'm also a bit more mature so we'll see.
What could really fuck me up i think would be if she asks me to be exclusive, to be real boyfriend and girlfriend and then does stuff behind my back. She doesn't seem to be this kind of woman. We'll see.
 

GHG

Member
A trap like "i'll get pregnant and ask for child support"?
I wish she makes a lot more than me...

Whether it's via a child, emotionally or physically.

Polyamorous encounters are never balanced, they are lopsided by nature.

As others have mentioned, have fun but don't catch feels. If you do start to catch feels (which I think you might already be considering the use of the word "relationship" in the poll), then it's time to cut ties and move on.
 

jason10mm

Gold Member
Isn't that a HIV prevention drug? I read about it in a medical leaflet one time.
No, azithromicin (commonly referred to as a "Z-pack") will NOT do shit about HIV. It is for some relatively simple bacterial STDs.

The HIV prevention drug is PrEP, though there are a few now, like Truvada. Point being, if you are gonna hook up with someone with a....dubious reputation, there are steps to mitigate risk. Especially if the guy is uncircumsized and/or sticking it in the pooper.
 

Toots

Gold Member
I've memorized every Asian ass that exists.

She can not escape, plus sounds like this broad is a repeat offender, I've probably tapped it and I've never even been to France :p
Lucky you ;)
It would be phenomenal that another gaffer was one of the Madone other relationships :messenger_tears_of_joy:.
We'd have to square it of on the Neogaf ring
Whether it's via a child, emotionally or physically.

Polyamorous encounters are never balanced, they are lopsided by nature.

As others have mentioned, have fun but don't catch feels. If you do start to catch feels (which I think you might already be considering the use of the word "relationship" in the poll), then it's time to cut ties and move on.
This is absolutely right and it scares me a bit, because i tend to get attached ...
But then again i know she's like that so i cannot resent her for it.
If i start to catch feels like i want her to be my girl and my girl only, i'll stop the relation instead of telling her.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: GHG

Toots

Gold Member
Do you live in Ohio?
I live in Paris, France.
Please don't try to dox me or the girl (especially the girl).
I feel like i already said enough about her for some weirdo like a 4chan detective to find her and it preoccupies me more than any std she could give me :/
So please guys no weird stuff, let the story run its course.
 

IntentionalPun

Ask me about my wife's perfect butthole
I live in Paris, France.
Please don't try to dox me or the girl (especially the girl).
I feel like i already said enough about her for some weirdo like a 4chan detective to find her and it preoccupies me more than any std she could give me :/
So please guys no weird stuff, let the story run its course.
Hah nah, doxxing is lame.
 
I wish i could put pics of her here so you see how beuatiful she is.
She's half vietnamese half spanish, with flowing black hair with the occasional silver thread of a white hair here and there. She has the sweetest tiny ass any honest man could want, and her skin is the colour of my dreams
giphy.gif
 

bitbydeath

Member
How fast ?

Thanks for your input. Safe sex is the way you're right (i might not have heed this advice unfortunately :/ don't worry gaf, i'll make a serology update in 3 month...)

I don't know why you guys think she's cheating on someone with me. She's a divorced mother of one, has good relations with her ex-husband, and says upfront she's polyamorous and pansexual (did i regain the lost half of gaf Trunx81 Trunx81 ?) on the social media platform where i met her.
About the angry husband with a gun, i live in France so worst that can happen to me is having him (which i repeat doesn't exist :messenger_grinning_sweat:) trying to fuck my wife (which doesn't exist either)...

I swear if i can take unincriminating pics you guys will be the first to see them ;)

I know i really messed up going in unprotected, well first protected and then unprotected... i'm dumb like that. I really hope i'll be good in 3 month. If not, well we truly will have a neogaf exclusive on our hands. "How a sucker caught aids and trumpeted about it on a gaming forum".
Maybe you should tell her that you got pregnant, that’d really switch the tables!
 
Last edited:

Grildon Tundy

Gold Member
"Traditions are solutions to problems we've forgotten."

I think that axiom applies to traditional monogamy, which is already a tightrope walk; throw another human or five in the mix with polyamory, and it's like balancing with other people bouncing on the wire.

Did we learn nothing from this Breaking Benjamin classic?

 

Raven117

Member
OP.....really....listen to most of the posters in this thread....

If you value yourself, your sanity, and your health....stop this. Now. Take a cold shower. Flog the dolphin 5x a day, but you need to get this under control. You will be crushed by this one way or another.
 

Fools idol

Banned
I've known a lot of Polyam couples and individuals and over the years thanks to my friend hosting a mental health and relationship clinic a few times a year. Fun factoid for you - 75% of (yes, three quarters of) the 'danger to others' flags that got raised were either from Polyam people, or individuals who (unknowingly in many cases) had relationships or sexual encounters with people in the polyam scene in London at the time (mid 2000's).

Now with that out of the way to preface my take here... run the fuck away, close the door, lock the door.

Polyam people are 9/10 times masking deep emotional / mental traumas in their past, and they use the whole 'I'm polyamorous' thing as a means to avoid dealing with the root cause of their commitment fears. Many controlling and predatory individuals were polyamarous.

tLDR, as the old saying goes, never stick your dick in crazy.
 

lethial

Reeeeeeee
Who are you and why do you think your life is so important you had to make a thread about it
 
Last edited:

cash_longfellow

Gold Member
It's certainly amazing what some soggy ham and pubic hair can do to a guy.
Kind of a side note, but I love the soggy ham like two days after Thanksgiving if it’s pineapple. Amazing flavor…
Secondary side note, the soggy ham you mention probably doesn’t taste the same.
 

RJMacready73

Simps for Amouranth
Good sex is great, but it's not the basis of a sound relationship. Shared values, shared interests, shared goals, enjoying the boring moments together, trust, reciprocity, loyalty, honesty...you build a relationship on those things.

Don't catch feels.
Depends on the ops age, if he's early 20's just run with it and go wild, if he's in his 30's yeah bail
 

Toots

Gold Member
Idiot + "My first asian girlfriend" combo.
Sure dude if it makes you happy. Meanwhile who's making sweet love to a beautiful woman ? Me, and probably a lot of other dudes, but definitely not you :/
I can only imagine the total shitshow onlyfans would be if the girls had to ACTUALLY put out when a simp drops money on them.
My guess is it would break the fabric of reality.
They wouldn't be simps anymore while still being simps at the same time (because "you cannot escape simpness" is a natural law), each one becoming a black hole collapsing on itself. We would effectively be rid of huge killjoys like nush nush and TrueLegend TrueLegend , but at what cost ?
 
Last edited:

nush

Member
Sure dude if it makes you happy. Meanwhile who's making sweet love to a beautiful woman ? Me, and probably a lot of other dudes, but definitely not you :/

I'm a white guy living in SE Asia. So you couldn't be more wrong than Ronnie Mcwrong from Wrongsville.

I don't even need to make topics about it:messenger_sunglasses:
 

Toots

Gold Member
I'm a white guy living in SE Asia. So you couldn't be more wrong than Ronnie Mcwrong from Wrongsville.

I don't even need to make topics about it:messenger_sunglasses:
Are you dense ?
When i'm talking about a "beautiful woman" i'm talking about the poly i met, not about the 2$ ladyboys you see every saturday to make you feel manly...
The white guy in a foreign country getting laid is such a creepy vibe. Plus it implies you were not getting laid before. The proof you give that you are getting laid is that you are a white guy in SE Asia. Not that you are particularly charming or interesting, just a white guy in SE Asia. Maybe its enough, but even then, remember they don't fuck you because of you, they fuck a white guy in SE Asia. That is quite sad when you think about it.
37!? and he's asking advice on a fucking gamer forum...
Fortunately i'm not asking advices on how to get laid ;)
Can you uber serious guys chill out a bit, can't we just have fun without being to judgmental ?
Can't we all get along ?
bcca2caa621d3596313811ec5b957b86--rodney-king-famous-quotes.jpg
 

nush

Member
Are you dense ?
When i'm talking about a "beautiful woman" i'm talking about the poly i met, not about the 2$ ladyboys you see every saturday to make you feel manly...
The white guy in a foreign country getting laid is such a creepy vibe. Plus it implies you were not getting laid before. The proof you give that you are getting laid is that you are a white guy in SE Asia. Not that you are particularly charming or interesting, just a white guy in SE Asia. Maybe its enough, but even then, remember they don't fuck you because of you, they fuck a white guy in SE Asia. That is quite sad when you think about it.

Even if that was 100% true and not pure projection on your part, not one of them was polymorous.
 

jason10mm

Gold Member
Are you dense ?
When i'm talking about a "beautiful woman" i'm talking about the poly i met, not about the 2$ ladyboys you see every saturday to make you feel manly...
The white guy in a foreign country getting laid is such a creepy vibe. Plus it implies you were not getting laid before. The proof you give that you are getting laid is that you are a white guy in SE Asia. Not that you are particularly charming or interesting, just a white guy in SE Asia. Maybe its enough, but even then, remember they don't fuck you because of you, they fuck a white guy in SE Asia. That is quite sad when you think about it.
Wow, so being a white guy in SE asia is like being a woman EVERYWHERE ELSE? Damn...

lXqYYhr.jpg


"Is he ever coming back?"

"No, we never even found the plane he left in" :p

3E2lxay.jpg
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom