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NFL Off-Season Thread: "Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?"

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D

Dragon

Banned
bionic77 said:
Those kind of assumptions are what got Ben in trouble in the first place!

Speaking of valentines. You single kids be sure to enjoy your time and nail as many sluts as possible. If you can't get an attractive girl (I empathize with you Pat fans) then get a she pig like Dragon did and turn off the lights and think of someone else. Just because I am not getting laid these days doesn't mean you guys can't be getting some!
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tumblr_lefsxcQzPx1qf8yek.gif


:jnc

bros she is not bad looking. She's thin, blonde and has nice boobs.
 
L

levious

That throwing stick stunt of yours has boomeranged on us.
he lives in a retirement community and spends his free time catfishing, he's not exactly starved for attention.
 
G

goldlion054

Member
eznark said:
Uh, you're going out with some ogre who didn't have previous plans on Valentine's Day. Take her to a truck stop, buy her a can of Olde English, drill her in the bathroom then leave her there where she probably works weekends anyway.
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You have given alot of advice and made alot of great comments in my time on gaf, but this might be among your best. When you retire and we enshrine you in the hall of fame, I'll make sure this quote goes on your bust
 
B

bionic77

Member
eznark said:
Fucking hell, bionic is the new Larry.
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Twins are tough dude. The pregnancy was hell and now we never have a moment to ourselves.

Still worth it. I am sleeping 6+ hours a night now so my life is not hell and while no sex is pretty crappy, I can at least take some comfort in knowing that most of GAF is having the same problem. I imagine once they are 3 they will be slightly self sufficient and the work can begin on the 3rd child!
 
M

Milchjon

Member
bionic77 said:
Twins are tough dude. The pregnancy was hell and now we never have a moment to ourselves.

Still worth it. I am sleeping 6+ hours a night now so my life is not hell and while no sex is pretty crappy, I can at least take some comfort in knowing that most of GAF is having the same problem. I imagine once they are 3 they will be slightly self sufficient and the work can begin on the 3rd child!
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So your first thought after 3 years of little to no sex is to work towards another 3 years? Sounds smart.
 
B

BakedPigeon

Banned
bionic77 said:
You single kids be sure to enjoy your time and nail as many sluts as possible. If you can't get an attractive girl (I empathize with you Pat fans) then get a she pig like Dragon did and turn off the lights and think of someone else. Just because I am not getting laid these days doesn't mean you guys can't be getting some!
Click to expand...

Hey man give him a break. Sometimes you have to slay a few dragons to get to the princess.
 
G

Greg

Member
eznark said:
Uh, you're going out with some ogre who didn't have previous plans on Valentine's Day. Take her to a truck stop, buy her a can of Olde English, drill her in the bathroom then leave her there where she probably works weekends anyway.
Click to expand...
:jnc
 
N

Narag

Member
eznark said:
Uh, you're going out with some ogre who didn't have previous plans on Valentine's Day. Take her to a truck stop, buy her a can of Olde English, drill her in the bathroom then leave her there where she probably works weekends anyway.
Click to expand...
A link to this should be his new tag.
 
S

SonnyBoy

Member
GAF, I need your Photoshop help. We have a coworker that we constantly pick on. He has an extreme hatred of Hines Ward. After much trash talk, he agreed to a bet... He lost that bet and had to wear a pink ladies Hines Ward jersey after the Ravens failed him in the playoffs.

My request... Can someone/anyone photoshop a smiling Hines Ward face onto a Ravens player? Please! lol
 
W

Wes

venison crêpe
Was this posted yesterday?

"WR Alshon Jeffery, #SouthCarolina is training at St Vincents here in Indy. Sources say he's weighing 249lbs + running a 4.88 Forty"
 
D

Drakeon

Member
Wes said:
Was this posted yesterday?

"WR Alshon Jeffery, #SouthCarolina is training at St Vincents here in Indy. Sources say he's weighing 249lbs + running a 4.88 Forty"
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I keep seeing mock drafts with us taking him, and I keep saying I don't want the fatty. Pick someone else!
 
N

Nemesis121

Member
Giants project to be $7mil over the Cap...


While the Skins are projected to be $47 mil under, so that blank check Synder is willing to give Peyton I fully expect him to be on the Redskins...
 
L

LiveWire

Member
Nemesis121 said:
Giants project to be $7mil over the Cap...


While the Skins are projected to be $47 mil under, so that blank check Synder is willing to give Peyton I fully expect him to be on the Redskins...
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It's either Miami or Washington. Both give Peyton the chance to compete against QBs that he would want to play (Brady, Eli), both have good defenses and a good enough rushing offense. Miami has the edge on O-line and WR, but that could easily be rectified for Washington through FA or draft (Randy Moss, Dwayne Bowe, DeSean Jackson, Justin Blackmon, etc.)

Of course, knowing how cursed the Redskins have been recently, I fully expect Peyton to go somewhere random or retire, some other team to draft RGIII, the Packers to franchise Matt Flynn, and Bruce Allen to pay Kyle Orton 5 years $45 million.
















Businessman_Holding_Gun_To_His_Head_While_Smiling_MON098144.jpg
 
L

levious

That throwing stick stunt of yours has boomeranged on us.
I don't see him wanting to play in his brother's division. I'd think it's more likely that he wants to go back to the AFC East. Never felt right with him in the then new AFC South.
 
B

BigAT

Member
LiveWire said:
It's either Miami or Washington. Both give Peyton the chance to compete against QBs that he would want to play (Brady, Eli), both have good defenses and a good enough rushing offense. Miami has the edge on O-line and WR, but that could easily be rectified for Washington through FA or draft (Randy Moss, Dwayne Bowe, DeSean Jackson, Justin Blackmon, etc.)

Of course, knowing how cursed the Redskins have been recently, I fully expect Peyton to go somewhere random or retire, some other team to draft RGIII, the Packers to franchise Matt Flynn, and Bruce Allen to pay Kyle Orton 5 years $45 million.

http://i941.photobucket.com/albums/ad259/LarryMillstone/Businessman_Holding_Gun_To_His_Head_While_Smiling_MON098144.jpg[img][/QUOTE]

What exactly makes you think he wants to play against Eli? Everything I have seen seems to indicate that they both absolutely hate the extra attention and focus put on them during the "Manning Bowl". Also, both of them genuinely root for the other to win and it sounds like it turns their parents into emotional wrecks when they play each other. I really don't see Peyton wanting to do that twice a year, every year.
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B

BaltimoreLarry

Member
What the fuck are we doing? Joe Flacco is not the answer, and he's proven it over and over again. He's not getting better, he's hit his ceiling, and it's an AFC Championship loss. As much as I hate Cam, he's not making Joe throw like shit. He's not accurate. He's uncomfortable in the pocket. Oh, and he's a whiny bitch. If the Ravens want to put stock in his one game this year that was good, the AFC Championship, then they should look at the end result. A fucking loss. Not even a loss you can blame on the D, because they were good, or the kicker. It shouldn't have even come down to that FG. Flacco is an average QB, just because we won a Superbowl with an average QB doesn't mean we can do it again. Dilfer was an outlier, not the model, and to resign Flacco long term is to say we want to conform to the 2000 model. Problem is, our Defense isn't as good and is only going to get worse unless we get more talent to replace our oldies.

This is a sad day, but I knew it would come. Why? Because people are stupid.
 
E

eznark

Banned
BaltimoreLarry said:
What the fuck are we doing? Joe Flacco is not the answer, and he's proven it over and over again. He's not getting better, he's hit his ceiling, and it's an AFC Championship loss. As much as I hate Cam, he's not making Joe throw like shit. He's not accurate. He's uncomfortable in the pocket. Oh, and he's a whiny bitch. If the Ravens want to put stock in his one game this year that was good, the AFC Championship, then they should look at the end result. A fucking loss. Not even a loss you can blame on the D, because they were good, or the kicker. It shouldn't have even come down to that FG. Flacco is an average QB, just because we won a Superbowl with an average QB doesn't mean we can do it again. Dilfer was an outlier, not the model, and to resign Flacco long term is to say we want to conform to the 2000 model. Problem is, our Defense isn't as good and is only going to get worse unless we get more talent to replace our oldies.

This is a sad day, but I knew it would come. Why? Because people are stupid.
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Just wait til they sign Hines Ward, that'll make everything better!
 
L

LiveWire

Member
BigAT said:
What exactly makes you think he wants to play against Eli? Everything I have seen seems to indicate that they both absolutely hate the extra attention and focus put on them during the "Manning Bowl". Also, both of them genuinely root for the other to win and it sounds like it turns their parents into emotional wrecks when they play each other. I really don't see Peyton wanting to do that twice a year, every year.
Click to expand...

He's a competitor. I don't believe that bullshit about their parents hating them playing each other. They did it all throughout their childhood.
 
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