davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
Do you guys usually get girls messaging you or something? Rarely ever happens to me, so I would always reply...
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Online Dating |OT| Please Respond
- Thread starter Jhoan
- Start date
The one girl who did message me, I still talk to.
megamerican
Member
When girls message me it's usually always something like that, I think it's due to them being uncomfortable putting themselves out there. I'll be honest a lot of the longer openers I've gotten tend to be from the more "out there" ones.
If you're attracted to her, which I'm just assuming you're not, just reply similarly like "Hey
What's new?" Some of them really open up, sometimes the conversation dies on the vine. You never know.User 479360
Banned
Rarely, but I always reply back.
Cross-posted:
It turns out that the girl from the video game store just forgot to reply and wants to talk. I'm elated.
I went into the store yesterday, because I had to return something, and she was there. It was awkward for me because she hadn't replied and didn't seem to say anything, then walked into the back room after serving her customer.
I sent her a message today, apologizing for making things awkward, but she replied with the above.
I guess she tried to say hi, but I didn't notice it. She said no hard feelings.
In other news:
1) The 35 year-old has been a bit distant. She's always going out places and never makes the time to meet, but texts me everyday. I know she's nervous and self-conscious, so I think she's putting it off.
2) The girl I met yesterday hasn't texted much. I'll see if she does.
3) The 19 year-old stopped texting, for some reason.
4) A girl I'd been talking to on Tinder said she'd like to go to a movie sometime, but after exams.
Are you setting up something new with this girl? Long weekend and all.
Oh, don't get me wrong. I like moving things into the physical world as quick as I can. I aim for the first date to be within two weeks of my first OKC message. And I try to switch to texting in under two days.
The reason I'm so likely to ignore a "hi" - I made sure to add conversation hooks in my profile. For example, under "you should message me if" I have "you've ever fought a bear and lived to tell the tale...or didn't live to tell the tale, yet somehow managed to sign up for an online dating site". It's led to girls telling me about bears who've eaten their lunch, or asking if teddy bears count.
Maybe once every other week/every three weeks? It's more likely I'll just get a Like.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Yeah, that's basically how I approach it. I just let them message me, and the ones that I like, I reply to. Of the 2 messages that I've sent others, I have a 50% response rate. I realize the sample size is incredibly small.
I only get a few messages a week, whenever I'm active (which I'm not, and my response rate is "very selective"); I couldn't deal with more than that. But, I'm mostly a passive, rather than active, user.
User 479360
Banned
Planning to, yeah. Just giving it a couple of days.
mango drank
Member
Posted this when I first created it, but it's been a while. Any advice on my profile? I think I need a new main pic.
snip
snip
I dunno Chewie, I don't think the older girl is worth your time. If she doesn't make time for you, but is always going out (with friends, I assume), that usually mean she's not interested enough to take it beyond texting. Being nervous is all well and good, and is typical, but if she's not trying to make time for you but still going out all the time it feels more like she's stringing you along and just using you for company. Also, didn't you have reservations about dating her in the first place? I remember you saying that her age kind of put you off, but I don't remember if anything else was a factor.
You should really push to meet her in person, and if she says she's busy/keeps being distant, you might wanna drop her. There's plenty of fish in the sea... and you've already got other prospects lined up! You can spend more time with them that way ;D
I think I should have posted this in Dating AGE instead of here, but ah well.
I grew a beard out for a month from mid Feb to March, just to see the look and how I'd do on dates. I did pretty well, but I hated the look and generally don't think I got a better reception.
Post beard has been pretty good though, date on Monday with a girl who just wanted casual sex which was fine. I had a date tonight with a girl just visiting for the week until she moves here in June. She was really cute and it went really well. I think she was down, but didn't want at her friend's she was staying at. She suggested coming back here, but we were in Brooklyn and I live with family. I asked to see her again on Saturday before she heads back, I guess we'll see. I have another date tomorrow with this really hot girl who moved to the city recently. I'm kinda feeling myself right now.
Post beard has been pretty good though, date on Monday with a girl who just wanted casual sex which was fine. I had a date tonight with a girl just visiting for the week until she moves here in June. She was really cute and it went really well. I think she was down, but didn't want at her friend's she was staying at. She suggested coming back here, but we were in Brooklyn and I live with family. I asked to see her again on Saturday before she heads back, I guess we'll see. I have another date tomorrow with this really hot girl who moved to the city recently. I'm kinda feeling myself right now.
ReturnOfTheRAT
Member
It always sucks when something that you thought was working out, just comes to an abrupt end. We had two good dates and since last Friday no response from her.
NoctisVsStar
Member
I'll probably steal the bear line with your consent.
Getting drinks on Saturday with a girl. Trouble is, she introduced herself awhile ago, and I deleted the conversation. Best way to get her name without outright asking her? I'm hoping she doesn't give me her number first, so I can just have her program it into my phone, getting her name in the process. Plan B is a trip to Starbucks.
Be my guest.
Be my guest.
Lone_Prodigy
Member
When you meet, don't approach her. Let her approach you.
"Salamando?"
*look at her with a slightly puzzled expression*
"It's [name]"
"Oh, haha, didn't recognize you at first."
"Salamando?"
*look at her with a slightly puzzled expression*
"It's [name]"
"Oh, haha, didn't recognize you at first."
User 479360
Banned
I'm thinking that, too. I'm getting sick of just texting.
I joked to her that I was talking to my friend -- who has no filter -- and, that if I had taken his advice, I would've been asking her for boob pictures and blowjobs on the second day. I think he's joking when he tells me this, but who knows.
-----------
I made non-concrete plans with the girl from the other side of the country. I asked her if she wanted to do something this holiday weekend, and she said "Sure!" I told her to text me when she's not busy, and said we could take a tour of the area so she gets to know it better, go see a movie or go to the drive-in thirty minutes away. She asked me where the drive-in was.
The 19 year-old didn't pay her phone bill. I talked to her on Skype a bit, but haven't heard much from her.
Also, the one girl who's coming home from school keeps messaging me off and on, and another one who's about to finish (who I met on Tinder over a month ago) asked me to text her.
The games store girl is the one I'm interested in most, and she's been replying off and on.
Anyways, for the last week she's been thinking about that and sent me pictures last night.
Your profile seems good in my opinion (this coming from a 28 year old woman who is not single). Nothing about it is over the top, but you've clearly put effort into it to show your personality. There's nothing there that gives that "red flag" kind of vibe and your interest in finding friends/partners seems sincere, so overall I think you give off a good first impression.
Ask her how she pronounces her name.
Gray Matter
Member
What if she has an easy name?
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
It probably rhymes with a portion of the female anatomy.
Serious answer(s): (1) Have you tried Googling the number? If you don't have it, offer yours and she'll reciprocate, since texting is easier. It's possible that it may be associated with something on the Internet. If all else fails, there's Spokeo/Whitepages.com. (2) Send another message and sign it. Hope she reciprocates. (3) You could try reverse image searching her profile pics and see if they're connected to a Facebook or Google Plus account.
War Peaceman
You're a big guy.
Putting a number into facebook is probably the best way. I've never done it myself but I'm pretty sure it brings up the person if they have it in their profile. Or use whatsapp.
Pretty much everyone I've dated has unique names so I've always been able to go for the 'how to pronounce' route.
peanutbutterlatte
Member
When you get a match on Tinder but they apparently unmatch you before you can even open the app...
I amazingly got this twice two nights ago, when I was asleep. Woke up and had two new matches, neither of them in my matches list... So weird.
I've had that happen a few times. Gutting when it's a gorgeous girl, too. Like, y u no give me a chance? Goddamn picky girls.
peanutbutterlatte
Member
Oh wait, just an app error, loaded now...
There's literally no solo shots of her. I have no idea who she is.
BIGWORM
Member
Great way to start a conversation...
davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
haha, funny. i got a message from a girl and this is the first time someone has ever called me "immensely handsome"
davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
holy crap she's like blowing up my inbox and now she's asking me for MY number. hilarious
Congrats
davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
yeah and like that i have a date for today all of a sudden? i'm kind of weirded out, lol
Hope she's not crazy, having someone be really into you is the best feeling. Good luck!
davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
i think she's crazy... but i'll still meet up with her. she told me she'd call me when she was ready to head out the door and we'd meet up about 45 min after that. i was taking a shower and and she called 2 times, left a voicemail that didnt say anything and texted 3 times, once saying "id appreciate it if you let me know if you werent interested"
that was like in the span of 3 minutes. had to already do damage control for getting ready to meet her lol
BIGWORM
Member
Hooly crap, man. Run! Run far, far away!
Looks like I won't get a chance to use those tricks to find out the girl's name. Last week we arranged to meet up today in about an hour, sent her a message Thursday to figure out a place (with a follow up yesterday) and silence. She's read the messages, is online now, and nothing. Too hasty to infer that as a lack of interest?
BIGWORM
Member
Lack of interest.
Thought so. Dealing with some personal shit that's causing a bit of rage, needed third party perspective. Thanks!
davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
Too late now. I already made her drive 40 minutes to meet. Probably should have taken the out when I had the chance
BIGWORM
Member
You can be a real asshole and cancel, but don't be that guy...
If you don't post in 24 hours I'll call the police for you.
I don't know where you live, but I'll do it anyway.
EDIT: @Salamando - Hope the personal shiz gets better for you
I'm in a much better position now than I was when I deleted my okc account (employed, feeling positive about myself) so I went ahead and made a new one. I tried to be more myself in my profile this time, and within an hour someone very attractive and intelligent viewed and liked me. Here's the part I don't get. I was notified on my phone, so I checked out her profile and once I was sure about it, I liked her back and sent her a message. She was definitely still online since my reaction was almost immediate. She's still online for like an hour after that, but doesn't attempt to reply. I don't understand people's motives. Why read my profile and like me, and then do nothing when I try to interact with you?
Oh well. I can at least take away from it that my change in attitude is already getting me better results.
Oh well. I can at least take away from it that my change in attitude is already getting me better results.
Lone_Prodigy
Member
Do you respond to read emails/texts instantaneously? What if you get a dozen in a short span? Plus, being online means nothing. You could login then leave your computer. You could have the phone app but be away from your phone.
Thanks, but I'm not optimistic. I have two options...humble myself before the worst human I personally know, or say goodbye to my nieces for the next six years. Planning on making a thread about it after Easter...it has a little something for everyone - death, about four different kinds of abuse, jail, mental illness, whatever the exact opposite of police brutality is (police being too damned kind to someone who kinda deserves a whoopin'), and a sister who keeps a dog given to her even though she can't take care of it, so the dog poops everywhere.EDIT: @Salamando - Hope the personal shiz gets better for you
Funnily enough, remembered the name of the girl. She was named after a county in Ireland...
The online indicator is inaccurate at best. Even if someone signs off from everything, it takes at least an hour for them to show up as offline. I've heard at least a few cases of profiles being permanently online too.