Lord Ghirahim
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The Great Porn Experiment (TEDxGlasgow)
- Thread starter Plywood
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Read again.
Buckethead
Banned
I heard this 'theory' awhile ago and found it to be true personally.
When things aren't going well for you in your life, you can lock in on porn. It can be an escape. It's fun and fantasy and mostly harmless. It makes you feel good at least temporarily. It's your respite from all the frustration and monotony.
Also most people desire physical and emotional intimacy, so when the market is dry and there aren't any desirable women around, porn is your only outlet.
A lot of people won't go to bars/clubs alone so if they lack relationships to support them finding a man/woman or to provide them with networking opportunities then once again they go back to porn.
When I have a woman in my life that I like being around and desire, I am naturally less interested in porn and masturbation and more interested in investing emotionally and physically into her.
So in many ways it comes down to life situation/stage and opportunities.
When things aren't going well for you in your life, you can lock in on porn. It can be an escape. It's fun and fantasy and mostly harmless. It makes you feel good at least temporarily. It's your respite from all the frustration and monotony.
Also most people desire physical and emotional intimacy, so when the market is dry and there aren't any desirable women around, porn is your only outlet.
A lot of people won't go to bars/clubs alone so if they lack relationships to support them finding a man/woman or to provide them with networking opportunities then once again they go back to porn.
When I have a woman in my life that I like being around and desire, I am naturally less interested in porn and masturbation and more interested in investing emotionally and physically into her.
So in many ways it comes down to life situation/stage and opportunities.
SillyEskimo
Member
My wife and I did an experiment once (for fun). Instead of jacking off, she would have sex with me whenever I had the impulse for anything sexual. It lasted 5 days. My wife can bring it hardcore in the bedroom too, but she is not a machine. She is amazed and often annoyed at my insatiable appetite. My sex drive is 10x more than anyone I have ever met, male or female. I would never expect my wife to keep up with my same level of desire. I've gone through enough women in my past to know that is not realistically possible. If a woman could meet me on my level, they would likely have all sorts of other characteristics that would not make a healthy, long lasting relationship. Porn is the great equalizer for me. It's kind of theraputic for me, so I can say with confidence that all of the negatives in this video do not apply to me. For instance, if I think about my wife's tits for 10 seconds, I'll be hard as a rock. Fuck. See, I told you so.
I would only do the "don't masturbate for a month" thing as an exercise in self control, similar to only drinking water for a week or something equally unpleasant but totally possible to do just because you can. But in the end, what's the fucking point? To prove you can? That's not a good enough reason for me.
It was a very interesting video though. I happen to fall in the "older guy" argument. I could see how watching high speed porn from 14-whenever could cause some issues. I wasn't watching high speed porn until my mid 20's. If I had it when I was a kid, I would still be locked up in my parent's basement today and the walls would look like the lower levels in the Aliens movie.
I would only do the "don't masturbate for a month" thing as an exercise in self control, similar to only drinking water for a week or something equally unpleasant but totally possible to do just because you can. But in the end, what's the fucking point? To prove you can? That's not a good enough reason for me.
It was a very interesting video though. I happen to fall in the "older guy" argument. I could see how watching high speed porn from 14-whenever could cause some issues. I wasn't watching high speed porn until my mid 20's. If I had it when I was a kid, I would still be locked up in my parent's basement today and the walls would look like the lower levels in the Aliens movie.
mclaren777
Member
I wish you the best of luck. I know from personal experience that it can be done and it's really not that hard once you get over the initial hurdle.
Sutton Dagger
Member
Do not take any advice related to sexuality from this poster, you have been warned!
BlueTsunami
there is joy in sucking dick
Its been a day since my last jerk, just reading through this thread is giving me a chub. Lawd Jesus give me strength.
SpeedingUptoStop
will totally Facebook friend you! *giggle* *LOL*
90 days? fuck it, let's do it. That doesn't count as a contest, right? It's like a group exercise, man.
Keavy_Rain
Member
Good Job Bob
Member
GAF, I just deleted 500GB of amazing porn.
I'm quitting porn for the rest of my life.
Just last week I microwaved a banana peel and fucked it while watching Asa Akira get DP'd for the first time.
No more.
I'm quitting porn for the rest of my life.
Just last week I microwaved a banana peel and fucked it while watching Asa Akira get DP'd for the first time.
No more.
SpeedingUptoStop
will totally Facebook friend you! *giggle* *LOL*
And if you delete the internet, there are still a few other internets that need to be deleted as well. So, good luck.
MidgarBlowedUp
Member
P90-seX is what I call it.
It's a form of penis muscle confusion. On one monitor I have guy on guy which makes me uncomfortably limp but, on the other monitor I have guy on girl which makes me super hard. It's quite the work out, you can't tell if your coming or going.
It's a form of penis muscle confusion. On one monitor I have guy on guy which makes me uncomfortably limp but, on the other monitor I have guy on girl which makes me super hard. It's quite the work out, you can't tell if your coming or going.
CornBurrito
Member
Moderation doesn't exist!
Earthstrike
Member
Yeah I saw this last night and told myself I'd start. What do I really have to lose? Day 1 went by fine.
Conciliator
Banned
I'm as skeptical of all this as ever. I'm about to go to bed so I won't try that hard right now, suffice it to say that the people are naturally drawn to the idea of detoxifying their body, and due to our puritanical history(or so I'm guessing) are naturally drawn to the idea of the withholding of easily accessible pleasure inherently being a path to greater pleasure. These concepts, while not universally irrelevant, have a dangerous romance that have led others to things like holistic medicine, anti-vaccination movements and other thought processes that are wrong despite feeling right.
Of course, not masturbating isn't going to get you into too much trouble(for most people, at least); it's preferable to holistic medicine certainly. But I am very much skeptical of any proposed health benefits. As always, I am open to significant peer-reviewed science from multiple sources, and as always a really active blog with an agenda is not scientific evidence.
I don't mean to say that porn addiction isn't real...it is, and is probably grossly more common than we realize, and I could certainly believe that it would contribute to erectile dysfunction in some cases for some men. It's the this in-90-days-I-became-a-new-man stuff, and the implications of this-is-what's-wrong-with-masculinity-in-the-21st-century stuff(ugh, I could probably disagree with that in half a dozen different ways). I expect that once people find that they still have their own particular social problems in their lives after not masturbating for 90 days, they'll give up on that pursuit and this movement will prove to be short-lived.
Of course, not masturbating isn't going to get you into too much trouble(for most people, at least); it's preferable to holistic medicine certainly. But I am very much skeptical of any proposed health benefits. As always, I am open to significant peer-reviewed science from multiple sources, and as always a really active blog with an agenda is not scientific evidence.
I don't mean to say that porn addiction isn't real...it is, and is probably grossly more common than we realize, and I could certainly believe that it would contribute to erectile dysfunction in some cases for some men. It's the this in-90-days-I-became-a-new-man stuff, and the implications of this-is-what's-wrong-with-masculinity-in-the-21st-century stuff(ugh, I could probably disagree with that in half a dozen different ways). I expect that once people find that they still have their own particular social problems in their lives after not masturbating for 90 days, they'll give up on that pursuit and this movement will prove to be short-lived.
I'm going to try and stop. I don't think I'm addicted really, more of a habit. If I'm on vacation or something I really have no urges. But when I'm home and bored I just figure, why not? I think the problem is when I actually get horny. I shouldn't use porn to suppress that urge.
I'm going to seriously cut back. I'm going for 1x/week. I have a girlfriend, but almost every day I'm not with her I jack off. I feel it's affecting my mood, general confidence and (somewhat) my sexual drive, and the fact that I find it hard to stop means I have some degree of dependency.
The first week or two are tough; i've done this before, and the urge when bored and alone in front of a computer to look at porn, even if just to 'see' or to 'edge' is pretty intense, especially at the beginning.
EDIT: just installed a porn blocker on my computer. Should be an extra step between me and the stuff, reduce frequency.
The first week or two are tough; i've done this before, and the urge when bored and alone in front of a computer to look at porn, even if just to 'see' or to 'edge' is pretty intense, especially at the beginning.
EDIT: just installed a porn blocker on my computer. Should be an extra step between me and the stuff, reduce frequency.
CornBurrito
Member
I'm inclined to agree with this post.
The 90 day detox thing reeks of psuedo-science. I think some people (admittedly myself) could stand to resensitise themselves by cutting back. But I really don't think 90 days of pure celibacy is necessary.
EDIT:
Just checked the yourbrainonporn site. The 90 day period isn't the official recommendation. They explicitly say it depends on the person, and how severe the addiction.
So...... people need to get off on the exact same tame shit or else they're disfunctional?
Buckethead
Banned
Well that was painful but I watched it all.
Continued consumption of porn = Hyperreactivity & Willpower Errosion?
Uhh. No shit?
Same stuff happens with kissing/intimate nudity/sex.
Also don't like the term "addiction". Carries a negative connotation/value judgment.
It's also a meaningless and nebulous term without being properly defined. Or at least defined at all.
Teens more into porn? Well they aren't getting laid, so there ya go.
Either parents need to stop being giant cockblocks and educate their kids or you need to let them have their porn...
The guy calling himself the next Da Vinci is a fucking tool.
But if he's getting laid, then his friendships and relationships are naturally/drastically improved so it's obviously his depression and anxiety will go away.
Keep the porn dialed back. Be out and about. Workout regularly. Try to make romantic connections.
But if that fails, fap away.
Continued consumption of porn = Hyperreactivity & Willpower Errosion?
Uhh. No shit?
Same stuff happens with kissing/intimate nudity/sex.
Also don't like the term "addiction". Carries a negative connotation/value judgment.
It's also a meaningless and nebulous term without being properly defined. Or at least defined at all.
Teens more into porn? Well they aren't getting laid, so there ya go.
Either parents need to stop being giant cockblocks and educate their kids or you need to let them have their porn...
The guy calling himself the next Da Vinci is a fucking tool.
But if he's getting laid, then his friendships and relationships are naturally/drastically improved so it's obviously his depression and anxiety will go away.
Keep the porn dialed back. Be out and about. Workout regularly. Try to make romantic connections.
But if that fails, fap away.
I'm exactly in the same situation as you
"Get" a real woman? Odd that you introduce possessive terms when you're really just talking about having sex instead of masturbating.
Earthstrike
Member
I think a big issue with this is, there's an inherent limit on HOW scientifically we can study this. As was pointed out in the presentation, the canadian scientist was unable to perform the kind of rigorous analysis he wanted too because he couldn't find people that didn't watch porn. Its not like holistic medicine or anti-vaccinations where we can definitively and easily compare the two and know the results. Apparently, insofar as we can be concerned, the only non porn users are the groups that are being referenced in this thread. We end up in this position where our "best data" supports this hypothesis. It may not have the level of certainty we want, but we have it.
I agree with the whole new man thing probably not being the case for most individuals, but based on what we know, I wouldn't be surprised if there was an average "bit more of a productive man" bias that this activity produced.
Buckethead
Banned
Another thing that pisses me off about this video is the revisionism or at least lack of intellectually honesty about men (people) and sexual imagery.
In America:
- Men have always gone to strip clubs.
- Men have gone to porn theaters and/or adult bookstores.
- Men used to be huddled up in garages looking at Betty Page, etc. on projection film reels when their wives or parents weren't home.
Sex in general, even the scientific study of it has always been taboo from the early days Kinsey Reports and Masters & Johnson to today.
We're in the early stages of liberation from Puritanism.
For better or worse, porn will continue to be a part of society. The genie is out of the bottle.
How do we handle it? How do we move forward?
Evaluate the facts. Provide context. Make your own conclusions accordingly.
In America:
- Men have always gone to strip clubs.
- Men have gone to porn theaters and/or adult bookstores.
- Men used to be huddled up in garages looking at Betty Page, etc. on projection film reels when their wives or parents weren't home.
Sex in general, even the scientific study of it has always been taboo from the early days Kinsey Reports and Masters & Johnson to today.
We're in the early stages of liberation from Puritanism.
For better or worse, porn will continue to be a part of society. The genie is out of the bottle.
How do we handle it? How do we move forward?
Evaluate the facts. Provide context. Make your own conclusions accordingly.
I say we forge ahead until America allows for full nudity on primetime network TV. FOR THE FUTURE!
Earthstrike
Member
Didn't the video offer a justification for why porn on the internet constitutes a different scenario then men in those scenarios you list? I can think of a couple easily. For strip clubs, men don't always cum, they go there to get horny and drunk do they not? I have never been so if it's a social truism that you always pay for a hooker there then I stand corrected. Going to porn theatres, or using film projector reels? Well I look at it like this. How much information do you think the generation before the internet generation consumed at libraries in comparison to how much our generation consumes on wikipedia (per person of course?). I think the question of volume is relevant here, especially since it seems to be part of the hypothesis that dopamine based addiction is contingent on evoking an innate "binge mechanism" we have evolved that helped us survive in the past.
Buckethead
Banned
One sweeping generalization that actually makes sense is replacement therapy.
Try that.
The only replacement for porn is sexual activity so try for that.
But also pick up a new hobby/interest and have at it.
All he mentioned was "Playboy" and his justification was silly.
I agree with your statement about volume would also add frequency to the picture.
Volume and Frequency are very important. Paint with those colors and we can start seeing a more reasonable picture - moderation.
But the thing that is being preached in the video was not moderation.
It was quitting completely. How porn is such an awful thing and how quitting is so great.
Comes off as cartoony as propaganda.
Earthstrike
Member
Hmmm, You are right and I did not think of that. However I can understand why the idea of cold turkey might be the first one that pops into someone's head. When we think of addiction these days we think of cocaine, cigarettes and junk food. These are all things where if we cut them out 100% there are great benefits. Definitely better than only snorting some meth here or there. Naturally then we (they) have a propensity to feel that quitting something entirely is just how you quit things you are addicted too. Porn addiction would be different and I could see it being the case that if it was true that absolute porn abstinence had some therapeutic effect, then there must exist a corresponding program of moderation that would produce the same effects.
Vermillion
Banned
Eh, people do it both ways "get a man" or "get a woman."
Would you like to know about my relationship with my parents?
Castor Krieg
Banned
For all the sex you guys are not having in the next 90 days I will have it for you.
Buckethead
Banned
It goes back to the "addiction" term.
What is it? How is it defined?
I'm sure they'll keep the stigmas and value judgments but at least give us something tangible in regard to "addiction".
But that would require they tell the truth: that sexuality and sexual drive varies greatly across the population. It's relative.
As I said previously, I'm in favor of one distancing themselves from pornography.
But this would be for reasons of engaging in a "mature" relationship with a person and I am adult.
Porn is a good diversion for teenagers who are discovering their sexuality.
It allows them to test the waters consequence-free (to an extent) while their minds mature AKA until they're ready for a relationship.
Teens are generally ill-equipped to handle sexual relationships let alone an emotional relationships, so it's probably quite positive in that regard.
Also more people using porn as an outlet could probably be useful in deterring further overpopulation.
Yes there are benefits. No porn & no masturbation makes me want to have sex women more. I'm more charismatic. No doubt.
But comparing porn addiction to cigarettes is pretty offensive.
The most I've gone without sexual release was roughly two months. When I kissed my girlfriend I was up in a second and done in another second. It's not practical.
If you want to disappoint your woman sexually: don't masturbate for 90 days!
I don't have a woman to disappoint so I think I'll be alright!
Barbacoatl
Banned
Fucking Rayveness man. Oh well tomorrow is a new day.
Nice mis-characterisation of what I said
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
People keep saying this makes you want to have real sex more, make you more charismatic and somethingsomething. What if you don't have those problems?
I got it as more of a deriving more pleasure from it. If you are questioning any of it you probably are wondering if you have issues as well. Like, I always want sex, that's never a question, but it's definitely not as 'good' in general as it was when I was younger, in the sense that it's harder to actually get off, requires a bit more work. I can totally see the benefits of going back to being easy to please and having insane hard ons just from seeing a girl etc. /shrug. If you don't feel you have issues with it then don't abstain from it
nobody is going to force you to.Barbacoatl
Banned
If you don't have those problems you shouldn't be fapping too much.
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
Because...?
What's wrong with taking care of business before going to bed, for example? Fapping to porn isn't inherently wrong. It's only a problem when you don't know when to stop.
ConradCervantes
Banned
Well I have been thinking of doing it for a while, but reading through this thread has convinced me that it's the right thing to do. I'm going to try to "reboot" myself, so to speak. I just deleted my porn folder, which to my horror contained 211 GB worth of smut. Streaming stuff will be harder to resist, but I can will myself away.
Now I just need to figure out what to tell my girlfriend. Ironically she watches more extreme stuff than I do, BDSM and the like, although not on the sheer frequency that I have been.
Now I just need to figure out what to tell my girlfriend. Ironically she watches more extreme stuff than I do, BDSM and the like, although not on the sheer frequency that I have been.
Barbacoatl
Banned
Thing is I don't think most people know when to stop, I mean if you do great for you, but the reality is that most people don't, once they're deep into the habit. What I meant by my last post is that if you are a charismatic, socially adjusted, insert_endless_qualities_here person, chances are you don't even have time in your life to think much about it, let alone taking over your life to the point of nofap return. Nothing inherently wrong in my opinion with fapping to porn, hell I did today, but there's no point denying the benefits of increased testosterone in the case of males.
vincent vega
Member
you're gonna regret deleting your collection in a couple weeks.
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