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The Zero Punctuation Thread
- Thread starter Shard
- Start date
Lostconfused
Member
Sqorgar said:
You seem to have missed the fact that HL2 ep1/ep2 are very different from HL2 in the way they play out and also Portal is radically different from any game in that list. Nice try though.
Just like everybody else seems to have missed that Majora's Mask and Wind Waker differ in how they play out and Four Swords and Zelda 2 are radically different from any game in the Zelda series?Lostconfused said:
I'm not trying to bash the Half-Life series. I'm just trying to point out that there are just as many similarities between Half-Life and Half-Life 2 (and all the other games in the series) as there are between every other Zelda game - and that's still way less than comparing every iteration of Tomb Raider, God of War, Castlevania, or Ratchet and Clank (or pick a Mega Man series that's not Legends).
Heck, name another non-Mario series that gracefully went from 2D to 3D or from control pad to stylus without losing anything. That's not a failure to innovate. That's an accomplishment that few other series can match. To make something completely different and yet familiar and intuitive enough to fans of the old methods is not easy.
How many other series came from the NES and are still just as strong today as it was back then? You can't do that by making the same game over and over again. You can't just iterate slightly improved games for twenty years and still have people interested. In twenty more years, people will still be lining up around the block for the next Zelda game. And it's not because Zelda is the same old shit.
"Half-Life: Citrus Bazooka"
Genius! :lol :lol :lol
I don't have Phantom Hourglass yet, I want it, but like WindWaker, I just have no urge to get it right away like I did with Ocarina and Twilight Princess.
Though WindWaker turned out to be my favorite Zelda until TP, so I don't know, I might love PH. But I'll wait.
Also, the Okami reference was awesome. "Hang on a second, I'm gonna write this down."
Genius! :lol :lol :lol
I don't have Phantom Hourglass yet, I want it, but like WindWaker, I just have no urge to get it right away like I did with Ocarina and Twilight Princess.
Though WindWaker turned out to be my favorite Zelda until TP, so I don't know, I might love PH. But I'll wait.
Also, the Okami reference was awesome. "Hang on a second, I'm gonna write this down."
i think he was laughing at gaming in general allways being the same, him leaving Okami at the end saying that it was not original and still pretty much the same as zelda except with added stuff like being a dog and drawing stuff with the time period changed. him also saying eariler on how only nintedno can get away with this but infact showing games made by valve.
thats how i viewed it anyways
thats how i viewed it anyways
electricpirate
Member
beat said:
QFT. I wish he'd tackle that for great hilarity.
Prime crotch
Banned
It's probable he did but it wouldn't be as funny since this is mainly for the laughs like his article about Wind Waker being an alegory for homosexuality.beat said:
BrokenSymmetry
Member
I liked the final part of the end credits
Yahtzee said:
typhonsentra
Banned
His complaints aren't totally fair though. He brings up HL2, but obviously the good guys win in that one too and you can probably guess the plot points for whatever happens in HL3 whenever it comes out. I'll give you that Episode 2 had an interesting twist though.watership said:
That said, the general complaint of Nintendo getting a free pass it very accurate. No company but them could release a system like the Wii and have it be a success. People would've been far, far more critical of a similar system released by their competitors.
Lostconfused
Member
Sqorgar said:
I am not arguing zelda since i only played OoT (and dont remember most of it) and 3 hours of TP. I was just saying that hl2 added alot with physics puzzles and vehicle areas to the half life formula. And the episodes added a lot of narrative and character details to the game. Oh and portal was just awesome.
AlucarD.eq
Member
LMAO.... :lol :lol Still he missed the multiplayer.... "runs and hide"
Captain Glanton
Banned
Sanjay said:
I kind of agree with this--that Okami isn't fresh like it seems, because it's a re-skinned Zelda. On the other hand, I think that his point is also sorta that if your re-skinning is interesting enough [feudal Japan for Zelda's netherworld, magic for keys and bomerangs, etc.] that it can overcome that.
If I listed all the differences (graphical, technological, gameplay, interface) between Link's Awakening and Phantom Hourglass, it would dwarf the differences between HL and HL2. It would likely dwarf the differences between God of War and Conan, or the first three Final Fantasy games. Pretty much the only thing that's actually the same between Zelda games is Link and dungeons. Almost nothing else stays the same (even Zelda changes between games).painey said:
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Even if he gives Galaxy a crappier review than his Bioshock one?Amir0x said:
XiaNaphryz said:Even if he gives Galaxy a crappier review than his Bioshock one?
i like it when he hates on my favorite games even more.
But his Phantom Hourglass review is the almost verbatim comedy rendition of my review of the game, so I really, really think he's on point here.
AlucarD.eq said:
He's pointed out in many of his reviews that he doesn't care at all about multiplayer.
Another great review, I also HATED going back to the damn Ocean King dungeon again and again and again and again, and doing the same damn puzzles again and again and again and again.
Loved the game otherwise, but every time I had to go back, I ended up putting the game down for a week.
Fallout-NL
Member
VonGak! said:
Jesus Christ, this guy is absolutely brilliant.
BuG said:
i seriously always thought that that is what these threads were all about so I always avoided them
STOP
i still do not really understand what they are though
STOP
i would also like to mention that capitalization is not punctuation
STOP
to be true and faithful i should have capitalized everything in this post but I did not want to be a glaring asshat
STOP
I liked the Phantom Hourglass review, but I guess it's been so long since I've played a Zelda game that I didn't really notice the problems he pointed out.
Also, although you do go through the same temple multiple times, because you have new tools the way you progress through them not only becomes more nuanced, but faster and smarter. I wonder if he knew that, or if he was just glazing over it to be funny.
Either way, it was a funny review
"Sometimes I like to name Link "I Say" because it makes all the other characters talk like Foghorn Leghorn" <--- BRILLIANT
Also, although you do go through the same temple multiple times, because you have new tools the way you progress through them not only becomes more nuanced, but faster and smarter. I wonder if he knew that, or if he was just glazing over it to be funny.
Either way, it was a funny review
"Sometimes I like to name Link "I Say" because it makes all the other characters talk like Foghorn Leghorn" <--- BRILLIANT
itsinmyveins
Gets to pilot the crappy patrol labors
AniHawk said:
Everybody insults America, and while I don't agree to the same extent about all his point regarding PH (I think it's a great little Zelda game all in all) I still find it very entertaining.
Jive Turkey
Unconfirmed Member
Still my only gripe is that I wish he'd slow down just a bit. I hate missing a joke or two because I can't understand him.
EDIT: Oh man I just watched his Halo 3 review. :lol
EDIT: Oh man I just watched his Halo 3 review. :lol
Borys said:Don't let whining Nintendumbs spoil this thread PLEASE.
This guy is a genius and pretty much has the same taste as me: GOOD PC games and GOOD Nintendo games like Paper Mario.
I need to buy a DS
strange that I thought Super Paper Mario was a complete bore, while Zelda PH is the exact opposite. I don't understand the hate at all. It's EASILY my favorite handheld Zelda game. I know Im in the vocal minority here, but its true. The DS actually made the tired formula feel fresh again. PS - Did I just say Zelda had a tired formula? Oh yeah, Mario is boring now because he jumps still.
rhino4evr said:
Well, we've been over everyone's criticisms a billion times. It seems like it's pretty understandable, even if you disagree. Of course, what I can't fathom is thinking it's the best handheld Zelda game... but then again, I play Zelda games for their dungeons, so a Zelda game with the weakest dungeons cannot win by default.
Phantom Hourglass is the weakest handheld outing for a number of reasons, the Ocean King temple is just one of them. One of my major complaints is that there aren't any memorable locations or characters (except maybe the Link impersonator). Every town only has a few huts or things to do. Compare that to the likes of Minish Cap where a small town turns into a big world when you get small. Then you can enter houses, find hidden Picori dwellings, etc. PH would be lucky if it just had a bit of the charm Minish Cap had.