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[Jintor]

Sober: Stuck his head out at the wrong time. Thankfully he’s got that helmet nowadays.

Sober: Anyway, Septic gets the fuck outta dodge. One grey takes a potshot on the way out, but…

Frontieuk: Seriously, Septic can’t be hit when running. It just doesn’t happen.
Deraldin: This, I can confirm.
Luigi87: That a medkit?

Sober: Yeah. Some kind of nano-tech omnigel kind of dealy in spray form, from what the labcoats tell me. I don’t really understand it myself, but it’s got enough painkillers in it to let you get on with it… provided you can get to a medbay within an hour or two after use.
Rentahamster: Or what?
Frontieuk: Well, you’ll probably go into cardiac arrest or something. But hey, it’s better than dying out there!
Fin: Yeah… does sound better.

Frontieuk: Anyway, Thy still can’t hit for shit…

Frontieuk: …and the rookie’s still shitting his pants in terror all the way back there.

 

[TemplaerDude]

This is brilliant, fantastic. I need the rest!!

 

[Jintor]

Fin: So, I’m guessing Thy runs the fuck away from the burning truck.
Sober: Yep.
Frontieuk: As you might guess logically, only the cab of the truck explodes, so Thy doesn’t actually need to run that far.

TheWizard: Stacks totally hit with that!
Frontieuk: You don’t get to call him Stacks until you’ve fought by his side, Private! But yes, unlucky for poor Stacks and poor, stupid Mupod.

Sober: Meanwhile, the rookie finds his balls, but not any ability to aim his weapon.

Frontieuk: A for effort, though.
Sober: And hey, he doesn’t crack under fire, either.

Sober: Intel thinks this grey’s weapon misfired or broke or something. Either way, the Rookie runs up. He’s read the briefings, he heard what happened to the other two glowy shits. So…

Sober: He does the smart thing.
Frontieuk: He blows them the fuck up.

 

[lorebringer]

Aw yeah.

Spoiler

also, I need a change of pants

 

[Deraldin]

Man, no one can hit anything. :/

 

[TemplaerDude]

So here's something I've been wondering: Do you think sectoids would taste good?

 

[frontieruk]

So here's something I've been wondering: Do you think sectoids would taste good?

they taste like fried chicken...

 

[Incendiary]

So here's something I've been wondering: Do you think sectoids would taste good?

Why do you think people want the corpses on the Grey Market? Sectoid subs.

 

[Grimsen]

So here's something I've been wondering: Do you think sectoids would taste good?

From what Epic Meal Time has shown us, Aliens look delicious.

 

[TemplaerDude]

Well I think Mupod should get punished for being a twit by getting the arc projector and capturing a sectoid so we can have sectoid salami on the next staff pizza.

 

[Unknown Soldier]

Sectoid Salami sounds awesome.

 

[zchen]

Can't decide what kind of meat you want? Get them all. The Cold Cut Combo is stacked with sectoid-based meats - ham, salami and bologna. It's topped with crisp vegetables and served on freshly baked bread. This combo has a little bit of everything.

 

[Jintor]

Luigi87: I can see that Unknown needed to patch Lorebringer up… but why did he climb on top of the truck to get there?

Frontieuk: Because he’s a god-damned idiot, that’s why.
Tu101uk: So now they’re moving up… they’ve lost visibility on target.
Sober: Right, right. Bad decision, but sometimes safety is more valuable than offense.

Sober: Not that Garotte can’t put up a good offense, mind you.

Spirit of Jazz: Neat kill.
Sober: He’ll tell you it was nothing.
Frontieuk: Anyway, the rest of the mission is just standard mop-up…
Sober: Well, except for this bit.

Frontieuk: Mupod’s luck finally runs out…

 

[Mupod]

Oh come on. What is that, going under the car?

 

[Sober]

Guess it beats the car blowing up and taking all of them with it.

 

[Deraldin]

Oh come on. What is that, going under the car?

It's obviously going right through the car door. Normal bullets will go through a car door, why wouldn't plasma shots?

 

[Rentahamster]

Oh come on. What is that, going under the car?

That sectoid put 5 points into pierce in the Passive and Magic Skill tree. Now he just needs Lightning Fury.

 

[Jintor]

Frontieuk: ...in relation to getting hit, anyway. Barely dents the armour.
Sober: Anyway, Stacks runs up and cuts the little shit down to size-

Sober: …and the party’s over.
Frontieuk: So, class, what have we learnt?

Fin: Medpacks can save your ass?
Rentahamster: Always wear a helmet?
Spirit of Jazz: Don’t just run blindly up to enemies in the vain hope there’s nothing lurking out of sight?

Sober: Not quite.
Tu101uk: Uh… random goddamned luck is worth far more than superior tactics and strategy?
Frontieuk: …
Deraldin: …
Sober: Give that man a prize!

---File End---

KILLS/MISSION BOARD:
Mupod – 17/7 (+2)
Thy – 12/7 (+1)
Frontieuk – 7/5 (-)
UnknownSoldier – 6/7 (+1)
Lorebringer – 2/1 (+2)
Deraldin – 2/2 (-)
Sober – 0/1 (-)

 

[Mupod]

hope you suckers like fighting aliens while I relax in a comfy bed for 2 weeks

 

[frontieruk]

Tu101uk: Uh… random goddamned luck is worth far more than superior tactics and

LOL so true of the game

 

[Sober]

hope you suckers like fighting aliens while I relax in a comfy bed for 2 weeks

It's okay, Jenny (my LMG) and I will pick up your slack as the docs glue you back together.

 

[Incendiary]

Nobody died? Damn. Worst horror movie ever.

 

[Deraldin]

Well at least now we know why three of the four guys weren't at the meetings. What's your excuse Unknown?!

 

[Unknown Soldier]

That sectoid put 5 points into pierce in the Passive and Magic Skill tree. Now he just needs Lightning Fury.

Burizon > LF Javazon before their respective nerfs.

Well at least now we know why three of the four guys weren't at the meetings. What's your excuse Unknown?!

You think my cute squirrel Elin Slayer is going to level herself up?

 

[Rentahamster]

Burizon > LF Javazon before their respective nerfs.

But that's nothing compared to Cao Cao's true musou.

 

[Unknown Soldier]

But that's nothing compared to Cao Cao's true musou.

I always used Guan Yu, because you know, it's Guan Fucking Yu.

 

[lorebringer]

Sweet I totally knew I wasn't going to die. Now I get to hang out in the infirmary and play videogames.

 

[McNum]

Sweet I totally knew I wasn't going to die. Now I get to hang out in the infirmary and play videogames.

I have been meaning to ask about that. What is up with the X-Com arcade machine in the Barracks? If this is just someone having an odd sense of humor, then by all means, indulge yourselves, but it just seems a bit... tacky.

Or is this some part of a cover operation? Do we sell X-Com arcade machines to make people thing we're fictional? If so, I applaud the cover operations team. They are clearly paranoid enough for the job.

Spoiler

(Yes, there's an X-Com arcade machine as an Easter Egg in the Barracks in the game. See if you can find it. Bonus: It's also somewhere else in the game, although not necessarily in the base. Keep an eye open for it)

 

[Tu101uk]

Didn't know I had that much "wisdom"... ;D

Looks like I finally make a cameo... Is it time for me to shine (or put my money where my mouth is)?

Awesome LP so far! Keep it up!

 

[Deraldin]

Didn't know I had that much "wisdom"... ;D

Looks like I finally make a cameo... Is it time for me to shine (or put my money where my mouth is)?

Awesome LP so far! Keep it up!

Depends on when the next mission is. We've got 3 people out, but there are still 3 other rookies ahead of you on the list and I don't think Jintor will send out a squad of all rookies. None of them have displayed the keen tactical awareness and knowledge of the importance of luck that you have, so maybe you'll get lucky. So to speak...

 

[Luigi87]

I'm counting on the survival skills of everyone else to keep ensuring my safe future of lounging around the base and collecting my paychecks.

It pays to be at the bottom.

 

[KO Traveling Hobo]

Just got caught up. That mission was excellent. I really liked the video commentary format.

 

[TemplaerDude]

While I suppose it's nice that everyone is still alive, I eagerly anticipate the first death...

 

[Unknown Soldier]

Or is this some part of a cover operation? Do we sell X-Com arcade machines to make people thing we're fictional? If so, I applaud the cover operations team. They are clearly paranoid enough for the job.

The X-Com arcade game is very popular by the year 2015. Uniquely among online sci-fi futuristic military shooters, it's a cross-platform title while can be played on the PC, in arcades, on PlayStation 4, and on Xbox 720. In reality, it's not actually a game, it's a disguised training simulation for killing X-Rays. The goal of the game is to find people who are candidates for entry into the X-Com project. Players don't realize their scores, K/D ratios, other performance metrics, and audio logs of their voice chats are all being monitored and evaluated. Suitable high-scoring individuals with a military background or civil service history, lack of criminal record, and who don't constantly call everyone online a Mexican Jew Lizard are quietly contacted by our shell organization posing as a small PMC for interviews and further evaluation.

 

[Rentahamster]

While I suppose it's nice that everyone is still alive, I eagerly anticipate the first death...

OverusedKoreanComic.jpg

 

[Rentahamster]

Are we all dead?

We're all dead, aren't we.

 

[Incendiary]

Are we all dead?

We're all dead, aren't we.

If Jintor's progress over in the NaNoWriMo thread is any indication, he's farmed out the entire XCOM team to start writing up legal documents.

 

[Deraldin]

To: Mupod; Thy; Lorebringer
From: Deraldin
Subject: Trooper Status

All this writing, I do not even understand half of what it is I am supposed to be writing. Director just tells me to write so I write. But not you three...

I saw the reports when you came back from last mission. Mupod was set to come back to duty 3 days ago, Thy 7 days and Lorebringer 1 day ago. Somehow you three are still in medical wing. If I did not know better I would think that you are avoiding active duty so you do not get roped into Operation: Mad God like the rest of squad.

Do not worry though. Deraldin tells rest of squad that your injuries must be more severe than first seemed. After all, squad members do not abandon their own. Everyone is most eagerly anticipating your return. I hear some of the guys planning a surprise for when you get back!

 

[Unknown Soldier]

I saw Jintor in some random thread in OT just the other day. He's alive...

 

[KO Traveling Hobo]

I saw Jintor in some random thread in OT just the other day. He's alive...

I got a "Soon, soon..." out of him.

 

[LuchaShaq]

Woops

Sorry posted some questions that should be for the OT not for this thread.

 

[Jintor]

"Oh, there you are, Director. We thought you weren't going to make it."

"Yes, yes, I've been catching up on the paperwork, Captain. A surprising amount of legal documentation to get through for a clandestine, under-the-radar paramilitary organisation. What's been happening?"

"Nothing unfriendly to report in the skies just yet, sir. Dr Jamie is reporting that XSAT-002 has just gone operational over Japan, though."

"Excellent. Anything else?"

"Uh, Professor Sonicmj1 has completed excavations on floor one."

"Good. I was getting sick of the jackhammers."

"We're also operational on the Officer Training Academy, sir. Mupod and Thy are discussing tactical concerns right now."

"I'll leave them to it for now. But I believe you sent me a priority memo about something, Dr Billiechu?"

"Yes, well, it's Dr BigJiantRobut. I think he's come up with something you're going to want to see..."

 

[KO Traveling Hobo]

yesss

 

[Rentahamster]

"Yes, well, it's Dr BigJiantRobut. I think he's come up with something you're going to want to see..."

The last time he showed me something that he claimed I was going to want to see, I accidentally the whole medikit.

 

[Unknown Soldier]

The last time he showed me something that he claimed I was going to want to see, I accidentally the whole medikit.

You just need more practice. There's an art and science to waving the magical pixie dust spray around so it patches a squaddie up just right.

 

[frontieruk]

You just need more practice. There's an art and science to waving the magical pixie dust spray around so it patches a squaddie up just right.

practice makes perfect... Right unknown?

 

[XANDER CAGE]

The last time he showed me something that he claimed I was going to want to see, I accidentally the whole medikit.

Oh, I'm sorry, you DIDN'T want to see new laser codpiece?

 

[Rentahamster]

Oh, I'm sorry, you DIDN'T want to see new laser codpiece?

Oh, I did want to see the codpiece, but billie's medikit will never smell the same again.

 

[frontieruk]

Oh, I did want to see the codpiece, but billie's medikit will never smell the same again.

oh so that's what you two were upto in the basement!

 

[Danj]

So whatever happened to this thread? It was awesome, but then it seems to have dropped off the face of the planet?