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sturmdogg · Dec 10, 2014

So my 4 y.o. son was running around the mall's hallway like it's his big personal playroom. I lost track of him for a couple of seconds, and I was about to panic and run like hell to where I last saw him when he pops out behind a display he was hiding behind to scare me.

And he succeeded. Almost had a heart attack.

Having scared the bejesus out of me, I started to wonder if there was a way to have something like a keyfinder on him that will send out an alarm if i lost track of him. Something along the lines of, if I press a button, a gadget on his person would start making a racket loud enough to wake the dead to make it easy for me to find him. Or a heartbeat monitor like in COD. Any recommendations?

Edwardo · Dec 10, 2014

I was kept on a leash. I dunno if ppl still do that though.

quickwhips · Dec 10, 2014

He is your kid put the phone down and pay attention to him?
No trying to be a dick but I know it sounds like it. Just there are creepy people out there and you need to watch him.

zer0blivion · Dec 10, 2014

Edwardo said:
I was kept on a leash. I dunno if ppl still do that though.

First thing that came to mind.

Bomber Bob · Dec 10, 2014

lol this thread

The Illiterati · Dec 10, 2014

Maybe you should discipline your kid. Teach him to stand next to you and not act like a maniac in public. Crazy, I know.

CrankyJay · Dec 10, 2014

Edwardo said:
I was kept on a leash. I dunno if ppl still do that though.

My wife bought one for our toddler but I'm too embarrassed to use it...lol

BertramCooper · Dec 10, 2014

capitalCORN · Dec 10, 2014

JASON!

backflip10019 · Dec 10, 2014

Edwardo said:
I was kept on a leash. I dunno if ppl still do that though.

I see this occasionally in NYC. It's weird every time.

HiResDes · Dec 10, 2014

I'll do it for twenty bucks an hour.

ElectricBlanketFire · Dec 10, 2014

Call mall security ahead of time and let them know you'd like to keep a camera on him at all times. They're usually pretty accommodating if you ask nicely.

Dubbedinenglish · Dec 10, 2014

Tie a ballon to him. Alternatively name him Jason.

JASON

Ferrio · Dec 10, 2014

Press X.

woolley · Dec 10, 2014

Edwardo said:
I was kept on a leash. I dunno if ppl still do that though.

Nobody should ever do this. It is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen.

neorej · Dec 10, 2014

I just have the NSA on speed dial, they know everything.

Seriously though, watch your kid and teach him to stay with you at all times.

Borgnine · Dec 10, 2014

sturmdogg said:
Something along the lines of, if I press a button, a gadget on his person would start making a racket loud enough to wake the dead to make it easy for me to find him.

Maybe a shock collar to go with the leash?

Askani · Dec 10, 2014

quickwhips said:
He is your kid put the phone down and pay attention to him?
No trying to be a dick but I know it sounds like it. Just there are creepy people out there and you need to watch him.

You may not be trying to sound like a dick, but you do.

I lost a kid at a mall once and it was horrible. We had just rode the carousel and went to the play are next to it that has 1 exit. I set her down inside and took her shoes off, walked out, to the side area to look in, and she was gone. I immediately went into full search mode asking everyone if they had seen her. Turns out she walked out directly behind me and back to the carousel and the operator picked her up. Shit happens. You can't plan for everything.

super-famicom · Dec 10, 2014

capitalCORN said:
JASON!

*Presses X furiously*

jts · Dec 10, 2014

Chain him to the bike parking, pick him up when leaving.

Watevaman · Dec 10, 2014

Nanomachines

AuthenticM · Dec 10, 2014

quickwhips said:
No trying to be a dick

Well you sure succeeded at being one.

DJ_Lae · Dec 10, 2014

I see kids on leashes occasionally...okay, maybe less often than that. It looks ridiculous.

I'm lucky in that both my daughters don't generally wander very far when we're in an unfamiliar place, although apparently when I was younger I was great but my sister would just take a fucking beeline for freedom every chance she got. I think it's just a personality thing.

I would sooner put my keychain beeper on them than use a leash, though.

CapitalismSucks DonkeyBalls · Dec 10, 2014

Have a conversation with him about the dangers of running off alone. Communication is going to be more helpful than some stupid gadget or leash.

Implement some type of reward/punishment system and make sure he knows exactly what gets him a reward and what gets him punished.

sturmdogg · Dec 10, 2014

quickwhips said:
He is your kid put the phone down and pay attention to him?
No trying to be a dick but I know it sounds like it. Just there are creepy people out there and you need to watch him.

No I wasn't on my phone, I was walking behind him and kept (or so I thought) a tight watch on him.

Borgnine said:
Maybe a shock collar to go with the leash?

I'm saving this for when he gets older and starts to talk back to me.

joelseph · Dec 10, 2014

Hold their hand.

Craft · Dec 10, 2014

heartbeat monitor you say...how about something like this?

ZoddGutts · Dec 10, 2014

Edwardo said:
I was kept on a leash. I dunno if ppl still do that though.

This was always weird. As a kid I remembered one parent having a kid on a leash walking to Elementary School, even as a kid I felt it odd.

Raptomex · Dec 10, 2014

woolley said:
Nobody should ever do this. It is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen.

Agreed. I want to punch the parents every time I see this.

Sch1sm · Dec 10, 2014

neorej said:
I just have the NSA on speed dial, they know everything.

Seriously though, watch your kid and teach him to stay with you at all times.

That's pretty much all there is to it.

Coriolanus · Dec 10, 2014

quickwhips said:
No trying to be a dick but I know it sounds like it. Just there are creepy people out there and you need to watch him.

Usually family. But hey, keep lapping up the hysteria.

KidJr · Dec 10, 2014

I'd never put my kid on a leash.

Mr. Diaz · Dec 10, 2014

As a father with twin 2 year olds, the leashes are a life saver.

cwmartin · Dec 10, 2014

if you keep em in a cage they can't run

Ecto311 · Dec 10, 2014

I don't know for small areas but there are GPS trackers for kids though. I use my eyes on my 5yr old daughter and that works for most situations. Come on man.

miscellaneous · Dec 10, 2014

My parents bought a leash for my son when he was like 2 or 3, but I told them I didn't like them using it. They're defense was that they're older and can't necessarily run around to chase him if he takes off. I still don't like it.

Anyway, to the people in here saying, "Duh, just watch your kid." - you obviously don't have kids. Those little bastards can disappear in a second. They're like little Houdinis.

Uncle_Classy · Dec 10, 2014

capitalCORN said:
JASON!

http://youtu.be/dP30WYgYiUI?t=1m28s

Taco_Human · Dec 10, 2014

Kids on a leash? That's fucking embarrassing to the kid and the parent.

Az987 · Dec 10, 2014

I know a guy who works at the SPCA who for an extra hundred bucks will microchip a kid.

Aiii · Dec 10, 2014

Something like this?

http://gpssmartsole.com/gps-smart-sole.php

I dunno, GPS will never give you a good signal indoors anyways, and even outdoors you will only get a rough idea of the area the kid is in and not the exact location, but there you go.

kurahador · Dec 10, 2014

Make him wear shoes that makes sound. At least you'll know when he starts running.

ahoyhoy · Dec 10, 2014

Taco_Human said:
Kids on a leash? That's fucking embarrassing to the kid and the parent.

"This leash is demeaning for both of us"

neorej · Dec 10, 2014

miscellaneous said:
My parents bought a leash for my son when he was like 2 or 3, but I told them I didn't like them using it. They're defense was that they're older and can't necessarily run around to chase him if he takes off. I still don't like it.

Anyway, to the people in here saying, "Duh, just watch your kid." - you obviously don't have kids. Those little bastards can disappear in a second. They're like little Houdinis.

I'm posting this with my 3yr old in my lap.LOL

You can watch your kids. You can teach them to stay with you in crowds. My daughter was taught to hold hands in public places with crowds, like a mall. My nephew the same. Maybe it's the gene pool of awesome that's working here, but I like to think that the parenting skills of us are somehow also responsible.

Samara · Dec 10, 2014

woolley said:
Nobody should ever do this. It is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen.

Its not really a leash, there are backpacks with Spongebob/Dora or whatever that tie up to a grownups hand. Kids can be lost pretty easily.

CrazyDude · Dec 10, 2014

Implant a pet tracker chip into his head.

Small children are like dogs anyways.

akira28 · Dec 10, 2014

beatyoass worked for me.
I made sure my parents knew where I was always.

Cardigan · Dec 10, 2014

Samara said:
Its not really a leash, there are backpacks with Spongebob/Dora or whatever that tie up to a grownups hand. Kids can be lost pretty easily.

LOL, that's a leash.

ElectricBlanketFire · Dec 10, 2014

Samara said:
Its not really a leash, there are backpacks with Spongebob/Dora or whatever that tie up to a grownups hand. Kids can be lost pretty easily.

Don't let the name throw you Jimmy. It's not really a floor, it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported!

ReturnOfTheRAT · Dec 10, 2014

The first time we came to America and visited Disney World my parents made me wear one of those wrist leashes.

kamorra · Dec 10, 2014

The Illiterati said:
Maybe you should discipline your kid. Teach him to stand next to you and not act like a maniac in public. Crazy, I know.

Crazy how you obviously have no clue. It's a four year old. It isn't that easy.

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