Right. But let's be honest, how many of us get something and think "gee, I sure don't deserve this". Or how many of us get things that we think we "earned", when perhaps at times they were going to be ours anyway, how can you even tell? It's a ridiculous mental stressor for one, and secondly, nobody has the time to think about other peoples plights. That's why horrible atrocities continue happening around the world. That's why the things that impact us closely, personally matter more than 200 people getting killed in some tribal conflict. I don't consciously think about the fact that I'm a male, or my height, size, knowledge or anything that I would consider a "positive". Most of us don't think of ourselves that way. But as a minority, you are constantly reminded of your difference, with good intent or not. Mentally, black people and white people are on opposite sides of the spectrum regarding this. White people don't consciosuly think of themselves as white, just like you and I don't consciously think of ourselves as male. Sometimes we may think of ourselves as female when it comes to issues of sex and gender discussions, to try and get the other persons perspective, but we can never really understand it. And it is a mental exercise that we do in a discussion, and then move on from. It doesn't persist. You can't even get some white people to think of blacks as human, intelligent or most white people, of being innocent when they're asked to think of it on something such as a jury even. Yet we expect that to happen in their homes?
And the problem is, and I speak broadly here. But white people as a majority don't consciously think about this stuff, because it doesn't persist on their minds. That's not an attack, but a realization of how the human mind works. That's why people always bring out the argument of "It's a free country. We gave you your rights, nobody is stopping you from doing what you want". All while speaking from very segregated areas. This "race" problem is something that is going to be around forever, doesn't matter how much time passes, because it's a mental problem. And race, racism for most people is something of the past, something that if it happens in the present, is an "isolated incident" or "doubtful". People are more focused on the issues of gays and feminism and middle class(Of which the majority is white). It's not a coincidence that these things are more in the spotlight and even acknowledged as being serious problems.
Most Americans think racism is ancient history. That is the problem. That's why minorities are told to "work harder", "Stop whining", "stop asking for handouts", "dress right", "speak right", "smile right", "wear your hair professionally", bla bla. Then the very same people saying that, turn around and tell their children to "be themselves". It is the curse of the minority to conform to the majority. It has and always will be.