Support NeoGAF

[eKongDiddy]

Next time on Criminal Minds

“What do ya got Rossi?”

“We got a skinny, little, scared dead-guy in a rented house. What kind of unsub would do this?”

“Couldn’t pay me $1000 to get beat to death like this”

 

[jroc74]

This reads like the opening to a Law & Order: SVU episode where Olivia can't believe anyone would be stupid enough to go along with this, as they're standing in front of the murder scene.

Forgive me for laughing, but lmao.

I wanna laugh at some of the other posts, but I don't what y'all would think of me..

 

[HiiiLife]

Accept it but ask for the money up front. Then beat his ass.

Yo this shit would be mad funny.

 

[lenovox1]

Can i do this even if i don't live in the USA?

And this is a US based site. That's FBI jurisdiction. And I would tell the site's moderation team as well.

 

[nickgia]

No? No. NO!

dude was gonna kill you

Yes.

 

[qcf x2]

OP, are you Mexican by chance?

 

[jroc74]

NVMND, i get it now... Fight Club!

Went over my head too.

Dammit.

 

[SafeinSound]

I don't see what could of gone wrong.

 

[Crayolan]

Sounds like a guy with a sadism fetish.

Or maybe he was just gonna fuckin stab you, who knows.

 

[jellies_two]

Sounds like a guy with a sadism fetish.

Or maybe he was just gonna fuckin stab you, who knows.

with such a well developed fetish and cash why wouldn't be familiar with clubs that allow that sort of thing. If he was and it was no longer floating his boat then he is well on the way to being a murderer and perhaps you should show it to your local police station in case they have him as a person of interest already.

 

[Crimsonclaw111]

You should report that dude, he might try it on someone else and actually kill them...

 

[andythinkpad]

Take the money and beat the shit out of him like Bruce Willis in Pulp Fiction

Don't leave your watch.

 

[parrotbeak]

Two hours? Ya, he was going to rape and maybe kill you.

 

[WedgeX]

The rental of an empty house to beat you bloody is so damn suspicious. The chance of you having been murdered is way too high, I hope you do contact some authorities so that he doesn't try the same with someone else.

 

[aliengmr]

Yeah he was going to kill you. He would have had back up too. He kills you then has a witness to say it was self defense or something.

Scary.

 

[BennyBlanco]

Definitely some bizarre sexual shit going on here.

 

[MagicWithEarvin]

This is some weird ass s***

 

[Buckle]

Some are saying its a fetish thing but two hours of beatings (that he'll refuse to stop even if you plead) in some house he rented for the occasion?

Does S&M reasonably go that far? Because that sounds like a budding serial killer testing the waters.

 

[DustyVonEric]

Dude, report him to the authorities before someone dumb enough accepts his offer.

You should send this all to the police and FBI.

Dude sounds like he was gonna torture / kill you.

Report this to the website, the police, etc.

 

[Polioliolio]

The fuck. Report that shit to the police.

 

[Steeped in a Sea of Games]

Even if it was on the up and up, guy knocks out a few of your teeth, gonna cost you a lot more than the measly 1 grand he gives you. Are people really dumb enough to accept something like this?

 

[Bakercat]

You'd be surprised by people out there that arrange wrestling with guys and expect sex afterwards. As a former Indy wrestler I have guys friend me on Facebook and they like to wrestle dudes almost naked and in very sexual ways. I'm not against it or anything, I just tell them I'm not into that stuff. Never had someone though ask to beat me to death. Be happy you turned him down OP. It could of gotten weird quickly.

 

[collige]

Some are saying its a fetish thing but two hours of beatings (that he'll refuse to stop even if you plead) in some house he rented for the occasion?

Does S&M reasonably go that far? Because that sounds like a budding serial killer testing the waters.

Fuck no it doesn't. This is some serial killer shit

 

[iddqd]

For two hours nonetheless.
1000 bucks for brain damage done by a fetish weirdo is not enough money.

I also think it's weird that you are meeting up with strangers to fight them, but hey... you clearly showed that the weirdness well is a lot deeper then that.

 

[pixelation]

OP, pardon me for asking, but are you black or some other non-white ethnicity? I just wonder if it was racially motivated somehow. Pretty damn crazy either way, I would've just replied, "Sorry I don't swing that way."

I am not black, i'm the guy in my avatar pic. I have been told that i look Chinese/Filipino though.

Do you know how fucking dead you would be if you got the shit kicked out of you for two straight hours?

He wanted to kick your ass for 2 hours?

2 hours?

How would there be anything left of you after 2 hours?

Dudes i was never gonna go through with it hahaha, i know what a single punch landing flush on your noggin feels like. Two hours of it?, i'd have jelly for brains.

He likes to beat up guys like you, huh?

What race are you?

I am Mexican but always get told i look either Chinese or Filipino.

Wtf? What does he mean by "guys like you"?
You got previous beef with this dude?

Nope, never met him before.

This guy's has you in his sites. I don't think this is the end of it.

O_O *looks under bed*

Dude saw you are a fit, healthy guy and wanted to harvest your organs.

Something like that... scary shit...

You do like to get yourself in some strange situations.

Dude, i did not ask the guy to send me that offer haha!

You goin to let him call you Skinny????

*rolls up sleeves*

Did you humiliate this dude in high school or something?

Impossible, i wasn't even in my momma's womb when he was in High School!

 

[fluffydelusions]

Bring this mofo along with you

 

[FUME5]

Wait, you're getting 10 grand a fight?

Link us to your last one.

 

[BiGBoSSMk23]

You two. I like you.

 

[ThisGuy]

A grand?

He in Ohio?

 

[CHC]

This is sooooo fucking creepy, man.

$1000 is really not that much money, absolutely not worth getting deliberately beaten (and who the fuck knows what else....) over.

 

[Adaren]

No kink shaming please.

 

[sinkfla87]

Bring this mofo along with you

I want someone to Photoshop a "Tapout" shirt on him.

 

[Keri]

All of those messages are a lot of evidence to leave, if he was planning to murder you. I'm going to guess it was weirdly sexual, instead, and the 2 hour request was to leave room for breaks and possible sexy times.

Anyway, you definitely dodged a bullet.

 

[nel e nel]

What does "guys like you" mean?

 

[Regginator]

Definitely dodged a bullet.

Probably literally.

 

[ShockingAlberto]

He was probably lying, and you almost certainly would have died.

But even if he weren't lying, a two hour beating would have probably killed you, and certainly caused you long-term damage. The $1000 would be like 1/800th of your medical bills.

I would probably send that information to the police because I bet this is the kind of guy who pays homeless people to hit them.

 

[TheOGB]

what kind of sick fuck

 

[Kingpin Rogers]

I would report him to the police as that is seriously creepy. I'm not trying to scare you but imagine if he found out where you lived or something like that.

 

[Turok_TTZ]

you'd be surprised how many offers I get as a security contractor similar to yours, OP.

especially when those offers come from rival contractors or some random casualty who has a "score" to settle with one of my employees.

whoever sent you that offer had one of two things in mind: murder or rape or maybe even both. or even something darker.

beat you up for 2 hours? assuming by some miracle you survive 2 hours of being beat up offering no resistence... sure the guy would be tired (if he didn't have hired help) but you would be in no position to resist w/e he tries to pull after said beat down. it's the perfect setup for rape.

that last message has me leaning on the rape part. dude had plans for your butt. no way he wouldn't have help. I'd report him to the authorities. people with such twisted fetishes are lost.

 

[Gin-Shiio]

This is the creepiest shit I've read all week.

 

[FuriousOne]

Dude, report him to the authorities before someone dumb enough accepts his offer.

Exactly my thoughts...

 

[AtomskEater]

Aside from all the "he was going to murder you" shit, $1000 doesn't seem like a lot when you think about potential medical bills you'll have as a result of some guy wailing on your for 2 hours. That's a terrible deal but also a super fucking creepy thing to propose.

 

[Jencks]

Dodged a bullet, literally.

 

[Alienfan]

$1000 isn't quite have a one sided fetish wrestling match with a 50 year old money

 

[mordecaii83]

I'm sorry, and maybe this makes me a bad person, but some of the posts in here have me cracking up!

 

[Stinkles]

um..two two hours of undefended savage beating? You could be dead in fifteen minutes. Your training doesn't miraculously protect your brain from swelling.

I'm an old fatass and could beat almost anyone to death in two hours if they just stood there and took it. Crazy talk.

 

[Rumblebones]

I like how you're the pussy for not accepting to get wailed on for a grand.

It's more than just a slight possibility this dude was setting up to murder you. I'd consider reporting him to the authorities, especially in the wake of the recent massacre in Las Vegas.

Who knows what kind of violated fantasies this guy has going on? I hope he doesn't access to guns.

 

[hateradio]

🤑🤑🤑

 

[ISOM]

I'm with the other people who said you would have been murdered or raped. If the offer wasn't already mentally unhinged then that last message definitely was, almost serial killer like.

 

[Eylos]

This happened on Mr. Robot s1