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"All men cheat" and no-one seems to care.
- Thread starter DeaconKnowledge
- Start date
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ChiTownBuffalo
Either I made up lies about the Boston Bomber or I fell for someone else's crap. Either way, I have absolutely no credibility and you should never pay any attention to anything I say, no matter what the context. Perm me if I claim to be an insider
Based my ex, she beleived that all men cheated and she felt that I didn't care enough for her because I couldn't get so emotional that I would hit her. In fact a couple times, she would state, "I wish you would hit me so I knew you cared about me."
Yeah.
Yeah.
DeaconKnowledge
Member
Mama Robotnik said:
No problem. I generally thought it was odd too. Hence the thread.
Battersea Power Station
Member
Was she asian?ChiTownBuffalo said:
Mama Robotnik
Member
ChiTownBuffalo said:
Holy shit. Domestic violence was internalised in her as an expression of love. Talk about damaged beyond repair.
You say "ex", with her attitude its scary to imagine where she is now,
BocoDragon
or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
Been there, done that.VASPER said:
People get angry :lol
ChiTownBuffalo
Either I made up lies about the Boston Bomber or I fell for someone else's crap. Either way, I have absolutely no credibility and you should never pay any attention to anything I say, no matter what the context. Perm me if I claim to be an insider
Battersea Power Station said:
Korean/Japanese
One time when I was really young, I overheard my mother talking to my German aunt about her brother (just to be clear, my mothers brother is married to a a German lady) - I specify this because it's two vastly different cultures.
Anyway, I was young so they probably didn't realize I was grasping what they are saying in any sort of important way, but basically my aunt caught my uncle cheating a few times with some 'younger girlfriends', told him not to do it again, and hopes he doesn't. Her and my mom were basically just saying "Oh men! Running around and cheating, they're so silly." And laughing about it. They didn't seem particularly upset, just... indignant. To them it seemed entirely normal and inevitable.
Made my kinda sad, I remember once when I was really young and my dad was still with us, I was looking for some money he stole from me (yes you heard that right) and was checking his jacket pockets, and found a bunch of condoms in some of them.
Another time we were on a train and he took off his wedding ring, and flirted with some ladies. Both times I was younger than 8, so I was too young to really grasp anything about it, but I was upset all the same for some reason.
I really hope I misunderstood the condoms thing but... honestly, I wouldn't put it past him.
So to the OP - I think people who are from an older time, or maybe just people when they get older, look at cheating differently - at least when it comes to guys cheating. And maybe this whole "we're supposed" to thing is why so many guys do it so guilt free.
I'm not against couples that aren't monogamous, but I can't stand it when people cheat.
Anyway, I was young so they probably didn't realize I was grasping what they are saying in any sort of important way, but basically my aunt caught my uncle cheating a few times with some 'younger girlfriends', told him not to do it again, and hopes he doesn't. Her and my mom were basically just saying "Oh men! Running around and cheating, they're so silly." And laughing about it. They didn't seem particularly upset, just... indignant. To them it seemed entirely normal and inevitable.
Made my kinda sad, I remember once when I was really young and my dad was still with us, I was looking for some money he stole from me (yes you heard that right) and was checking his jacket pockets, and found a bunch of condoms in some of them.
Another time we were on a train and he took off his wedding ring, and flirted with some ladies. Both times I was younger than 8, so I was too young to really grasp anything about it, but I was upset all the same for some reason.
I really hope I misunderstood the condoms thing but... honestly, I wouldn't put it past him.
So to the OP - I think people who are from an older time, or maybe just people when they get older, look at cheating differently - at least when it comes to guys cheating. And maybe this whole "we're supposed" to thing is why so many guys do it so guilt free.
I'm not against couples that aren't monogamous, but I can't stand it when people cheat.
ChiTownBuffalo
Either I made up lies about the Boston Bomber or I fell for someone else's crap. Either way, I have absolutely no credibility and you should never pay any attention to anything I say, no matter what the context. Perm me if I claim to be an insider
Mama Robotnik said:
I mean, she lives about 4 blocks from me. I've never run into her since we broke up.
I had a lot of regret, and still do that it went south because I couldn't prove to her that I loved her. And, I wasn't going to hit her either.
It's trust being broken as she's backing down on something that is either openly or implicitly seen as something exclusive. There are a couple things in addition to sex that I consider couple-exclusive activities and doing any of them someone else would be break the trust to me.Liu Kang Baking A Pie said:
ChiTownBuffalo said:
That's a sad tale my hombre.
And why are people wondering if she was asian.
Mama Robotnik
Member
ChiTownBuffalo said:
If she was that psychologically messed up, that broken, then I don't think it would have worked out. Sometimes people can change from that mindset but if it was so ingrained that she was demanding you assault her, you're best of out of it.
DeaconKnowledge
Member
ChiTownBuffalo said:
swish
I've come across the view point more than a few times. Most of the time, its from someone who has been cheated on, or who has cheated. Heard all sorts of reasoning, biological (men are built that way), sociological (society tells men that they have to). But as for the view point itself? I think its the dishonesty that breads it. That breaking of trust by a partner is an experience that certainly can shape and generalize a persons view of the men.
Crash Station
Member
Glad the only guy I share a name with is some VP that stole money from his company.
BocoDragon
or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
I believe men and women both have genetic basis to cheat, as I stated above.
But that female infidelity is seen as far more serious than male infidelity, is also genetic.
Every woman has her own baby.
Not every man does.
To that end, people (men in particular) are equpped with a higher emotions about the concept of female infidelity. When you can't be sure of male paternity, the actions of females are carefully scutinized.
Same reason for the player/slut divide. If a woman cheats, she isn't likely to brag about it.
But that female infidelity is seen as far more serious than male infidelity, is also genetic.
Every woman has her own baby.
Not every man does.
To that end, people (men in particular) are equpped with a higher emotions about the concept of female infidelity. When you can't be sure of male paternity, the actions of females are carefully scutinized.
Same reason for the player/slut divide. If a woman cheats, she isn't likely to brag about it.
DeaconKnowledge
Member
G-Fex said:
Most of the people i've talked to who cheated were still in love with the person they cheated on and don't want to leave.
Dreams-Visions
Member
I wish I could say I've never cheated on a woman.
sigh.
never again, though. that was because I was on some young & indecisive shit.
sigh.
never again, though. that was because I was on some young & indecisive shit.
chaostrophy
Member
VASPER said:
My situation is probably pretty unique- I'm in an open marriage that was my wife's idea, and she has seen one other guy, but I haven't been with any other women because I have zero sexual interest in anyone other than my wife.
Jamesfrom818
Banned
NomarTyme said:
fixed
Oh beaten already. Thats what I get for stepping away from my computer.
Starchasing
Member
i have noticed that most women dont care if its only physical ... since they value more other romantic aspects of sex.
So if you ever get caught cheating just play the it just happened it was only physical card
So if you ever get caught cheating just play the it just happened it was only physical card
MustacheBandit_
Member
Shit man, I'd be heading to clubs every weekend.chaostrophy said:
Arcane Hayter
Member
I think the people that act like cheating is "no big deal" are the ones that are stuck in a loveless relationship. I've known women that have basically no desire to sleep with the men that they are with so if some other woman wants to they're all for it. Sad state of affairs in my opinion, but a lot of people in my neck of the woods stay in loveless marriages... for life...
Leatherface
Member
I'm 34 and have never cheated in my life. I've been cheated on before when I was younger and completely in love. It sucked bad. I will never put another person through that pain. I've been married now for 3 years, but my wife and I have been together for 10. I've never once thought about cheating, but I'm also completely in love and 100% attracted to her in every way.
I think the real problem is when people marry, lose their chemistry and continue to try to make it work because it's comfortable. If the magic is gone and you can't bring it back, it may be time to move on. There is no use wasting life being unhappy. It's too short and there are far too many great things to experience. If you cheat (not OP, people in general), you're a selfish dirt bag, and/or you have no balls to step up and end the situation.
I think the real problem is when people marry, lose their chemistry and continue to try to make it work because it's comfortable. If the magic is gone and you can't bring it back, it may be time to move on. There is no use wasting life being unhappy. It's too short and there are far too many great things to experience. If you cheat (not OP, people in general), you're a selfish dirt bag, and/or you have no balls to step up and end the situation.
Arcane Hayter
Member
DeaconKnowledge said:
I've been around someone who claimed this too. Needless to say, we're not friends anymore.
BocoDragon
or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
True. The thing is, again on that genetic basis, a womans biggest worry would be that you have emotional feelings for the other women, and you leave her and stop taking care of her, giving her resources, etc.Starchasing said:
If you just slept with some other chick, even got her pregnant.. Well as long as you stick with the real girlfriend and raise her baby, there's no genetic loss for the girlfriend at all.
But if SHE cheats? Well, any sex might leave you raising another mans child. The other man will have cockblocked her womb, and depending on circumstances may have doomed your genetic line.
Leatherface
Member
BocoDragon said:True. The thing is, again on that genetic basis, a womans biggest worry would be that you have emotional feelings for the other women, and you leave her and stop taking care of her, giving her resources, etc.
If you just slept with some other chick, even got her pregnant.. Well as long as you stick with the real girlfriend and raise her baby, there's no genetic loss for the girlfriend at all.
But if SHE cheats? Well, any sex might leave you raising another mans child. The other man will have cockblocked her womb, and depending on circumstances may have doomed your genetic line.
doood..
wtf are you talking about? :lol
edit: re-read. I understand now, but still. That's some fucked up rationalization.
toxicgonzo
Taxes?! Isn't this the line for Metallica?
Until I am married to one woman, and have to stick with just this one woman, I will never fully appreciate the temptations that a married man must face.
That said, we all ought to be outraged when people cheat. Unlike the OP, most of the people I know would be rightfully angry when they are cheated on or when they hear about it happening to their friend. The fact that the OP's friends don't care might say more about his friends than anything.
That said, we all ought to be outraged when people cheat. Unlike the OP, most of the people I know would be rightfully angry when they are cheated on or when they hear about it happening to their friend. The fact that the OP's friends don't care might say more about his friends than anything.
The Faceless Master
Member
yeah, most of the people i know who cheat love their wife/gf and wouldn't leave them but "want some fresh pussy on the side" while having the wife/gf at home... i dunno, i can't say i'd *never* cheat, but i haven't yet and don't plan to!DeaconKnowledge said:
Not all men cheat, and not all women cheat. But a lot do. Far more than most people seem to realize. I would say without hesitation that every person in this thread who has been in more than 3 relationships has been cheated on whether they know it or not.
BocoDragon
or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
Those are the logical genetic reasons for why genders behave the way they do.Leatherface said:
It's much better than "society this, society that, society, society" that everyone talks out of their ass with. The answer probably ISNT just society.
There are implications for how people will behave differently if they have different roles in reproduction.
Edit: fucked up rationalization? Maybe if you're a creationist.
Arcane Hayter
Member
smurfx said:
I have certain standards and when friends or family display a complete lack of a moral compass I cut them loose.
Well, OP, sad to break it to you, but your wife IS cheating on you, she is married to me too! Seriously, my wife feels the same way. Very frustrating since not cheating is about the easiest thing in the world. You just don't hit on any women, and miraculously none fall into bed with you!
Leatherface
Member
BocoDragon said:
Yes, there is a genetic urge to fuck. Except my penis doesn't dictate my behavior, my brain does. This is why I'm not an ape fucking anything that moves. Using genetics as an argument for being a weak and selfish shit head is pathetic. (not directing this toward you btw)
Jamesfrom818
Banned
PJV3 said:
Because she was tired and you came back horny
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