Pun intended?
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Can men and women be "just friends"?
- Thread starter Rookje
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Pun intended?
BeautifulMemory
Member
if ex counts, I am totally fine with just being friend with her
Translation: "I tried to date all of them but they put me in the friend zone"
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
You're sad.
edit: but I don't blame you. It's the way of how men and women think now a days
.I'd love to say yes, and I certainly hope it's actually possible, but my experience so far has been a resounding no.
Of the five closest female friends I've had since my teenage years (so 10 to today, I'm 19),
3 of them have had feelings for me at some point and explicitly told me so
I've had (still do actually) feelings for the fourth
And the last one has been in a relationship for as long as I've known her and I was never that close to her to begin with, so she sort of doesn't count.
So if it's possible, it's extremely rare as far as I'm concerned. But then again it depends on where you draw the line between friend and acquaintance.
Of the five closest female friends I've had since my teenage years (so 10 to today, I'm 19),
3 of them have had feelings for me at some point and explicitly told me so
I've had (still do actually) feelings for the fourth
And the last one has been in a relationship for as long as I've known her and I was never that close to her to begin with, so she sort of doesn't count.
So if it's possible, it's extremely rare as far as I'm concerned. But then again it depends on where you draw the line between friend and acquaintance.
Fixed.
Dreams-Visions
Member
SpartanForce
Member
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
I'm glad I'm different though. I think differently and I act differently.
Wait, what the fuck does that have to do with anything? If an ugly guy finds an ugly woman attractive, does that change their situation in anyway?
Exactly
You can also have sex with someone and be just friends with them. I don't understand the people in this thread.
lol it amuses me how many people actually believe this.
It was my personal choice to start dating, yes, but once you get into a romantic relationship you can't keep hanging out with other girls. If you do, then there's something wrong.
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
Yes, I'm in denial right? If a good looking woman came to you at a party and stroke your dick and then asked for sex, I take it you'd be in it within seconds, right? I wouldn't.
Wow, we must definitely think alike and everything else is just denial!
ZephyrFate
Banned
Weird double standard, because in my relationship with a guy I was able to hang out with other men.
The thing is, even if you don't feel anything for the ugly ones. They probably feel something for you. This shit isn't if I don't feel anything for them then we're just friends. Yes you're just friends to you, but the other person will have the feelings you don't. So to them you're not just friends.
Your personal feelings are just one part of the relationship, you have to take into account the other person. Who as I've stated obviously feels something for you if you don't feel something for them.
The only possible exception to this is family, and even then there are some people who practice incest so that shit is iffy.
bu bub bu only straight, hetero-normative relationships count!
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
The point I'm trying to make is that it's about making sure your best friend will remain being your best friend.
edit: I'm so confused without avatars... I wasn't even aware that I was speaking to Amir0x, even when I quoted him.
I drink with a mix of female and male friends. we go out as a group and return as a group.
Some of my other male friends/female friends mix in a sexual manner but always stay friends.
If a chicks hot there is going to be some natural sexual feelings going on..
Some of my other male friends/female friends mix in a sexual manner but always stay friends.
If a chicks hot there is going to be some natural sexual feelings going on..
PastorOfMuppets
Banned
If you don't mind me asking, what do you get out of those friendships with those five women? I have a policy of not being friends with women unless they're gonna set me up with their hot friends (women make the best wingmen). Here you you have five attractive women who are all mutual friends with you and yet none of them have slept with you. I don't see what you get out of this deal.
ZephyrFate
Banned
SHUCKS. =[
I hate to like go cliche but Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind has it right. Maybe it WILL end badly. Just enjoy the moment and appreciate the time you spent together. You had fun, right? You enjoyed those moments? When you die, will you look back on it with anything other than a smile?
These small moments are worth the potential downsides. Don't live your life in constant anxiety of what might happen.
Fair enough.
But you see, the reason why I'm questioning you is because you're boasting about how (in my own words) you've evolved beyond the filthy, primal instinct of sex. It comes across as phony to me.
Green Mamba
Member
Nobody's solved the bisexual dilemma here.
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
I get the best time of my life. Traveling around the country with some of them, a couple of times a week we hang out playing games and watching movies, spend time with my best friend and her family during Christmas is one of the best periods every year.
It's those things that are important and I can never get enough of that. A relationship (let's be serious here, sex will eventually lead to this), however?
Alone? In the same way you would if you weren't dating? There's no double standard. Being in a committed relationship changes things. That's the standard. Where's the double?
SpartanForce
Member
Bisexuals are forever alones?
SlipperySlope
Banned
Thanks for the advice guys.
Probably not but that's because forward women are a turnoff for me. If I was into aggressive women you'd best believe I'd hit it.
The reason people are calling bullshit on you is because we've all been there. We've all tried to tell ourselves that the gorgeous females we knew were "Just friends" despite the fact that, if the opportunity presented itself, we'd wax that ass like Ralph Macchio. It's just that we were too scared to take a chance or we did and we got shot down.
PastorOfMuppets
Banned
Fair enough. If these are lifelong friends types of deals where you do unique things with them, it's something I can understand. I have guy friends like that but only guy friends. I'm going to New York with one of them in the summer so we can train with Marcelo Garcia.
As far as having girl friends around just for watching movies and playing video games, I can do that with dudes already.
PastorOfMuppets
Banned
I take chances with my female friends pretty often. The thing that I make clear though is that if you shoot me down and still expect me to be your friend along with all the perks with having a male friend (namely the emotional support), the only way it works is if you offer up one of your friends on the sacrificial alter to my dick. Otherwise, I'm gone.
Green Mamba
Member
Furthermore, the idea that female friends of gay men actually wish they were heterosexual (and therefore not actual friends apparently?) brought up earlier bugs me. If the female friends of gay men are just interested in "what if" relationships, wouldn't gay men wish that their straight male friends were gay? And they can't have be friends with other homosexual men because of the same issues that plague this apparent topic, so gay men can only have lesbian friends (and vice versa)? Apparently?
My head hurts.
My head hurts.
ZephyrFate
Banned
My female friends tend to be funnier than my male friends, so I enjoy having them around to watch movies or play videogames. You'd be surprised the perspective they can bring to the table.
^^^: All gay men go through a process of falling for their straight friends. It still happens to me from time to time. We play it off as me having a crush and nothing more comes of it.
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
I understand this, but some of you people really need to think for a second before trying to explain how other people really feel. Your previous post was one of those (but I'm starting to think that you were joking):
.
This is exactly what it is. My male friends I have don't play games (except for Dudebro-games) with me or watch movies (that's "gay"), we only hang out when we're gonna go out and drink. My female friends however, they're different because we do all kinds of things. I've gotten used to it and I like how it is.
brucewaynegretzky
Member
OR.... you know that you WOULD in some theoretically impossible situation, but you actually choose not to because you value the friendship.
Green Mamba
Member
What do you get out of friendships with anyone?
But you'd still consider them friends, right?
ZephyrFate
Banned
Of course, and like all things that crush will fade with time.
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
Street Fighter counts as dudebro in my world, you know!
(And I've already got Corky when I want to play non-dudebro games! He lives closeby anyway!
)Yoshichan you are a cool dude. Now please un-edit that pic.
Green Mamba
Member
Cool.
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
Two of them actually lurks on GAF sometimes, so I would rather not.
I was halfway joking. I understand what you're saying but, in the end, people aren't all that different from one another. We aren't unique snowflakes blah blah blah you've heard this before. The excuses you used were the same ones I've heard from countless dudes who were just too terrified to make a move.
ZephyrFate
Banned
Yet he could be using them because he has no reason to make a move.
Yoshichan
And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
Yep, and I can't prove anything - but do I really care? I'll just let it go at this: I'm far from terrified of making a move (and once again, I DO NOT WANT to make a move). I've been in relationships and I was always the one who made the first move. But again, I have no proof, so what does it matter? Having the whole "I don't believe anyone, why should I trust you"-attitude is really boring and I can't stand discussing things with those people.
Street Fighter counts as dudebro in my world, you know!
(And I've already got Corky when I want to play non-dudebro games! He lives closeby anyway!
we could spoon and play flower together.
corky could join too.
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