I swear to god, Thor 3 better open with a shot of every returning character and state their name and a summary of what they did in past movies.
"Thor; alien, not the God, brother by adoption of Loki, the villain in Thor 1 and Avengers, son of Odin, who is dead and replaced by Loki doing illusions making Thor think Odin is still alive. His weapon of choice is witty banter and a smashing hammer called Mjölnir, or Mjeuh-meu for the less initiated. Only he is deemed worthy can hold and lift the hammer, and those who can shall be imbued with the powers of Thor, basically calling up lighting and swinging that hammer REALLY hard."
"Hulk, or Bruce Banner, got his condition through a blast of gamma radiation. Has mastered his rage by the end of Incredible Hulk and demonstrates this in Avengers, as a result he can now turn into Hulk at will. Still needs Black Widow to calm him down to return to human form. He has apparantly forgotten about the love of his life; Betty."
"Hulk and Thor have a history together, they fought on the Helicarrier (that's a flying aircraftcarrier) in Avengers, and Hulk suckerpunched Thor after taking down a Leviathan alien worm thingy."
"Stan Lee. Creator of the Marvel comics you are now witnessing in filmform. Has a cameo in just about every Marvel-movie, look out for him in this movie too."
"At the end of Age of Ultron, Thor went off to follow up on a vision he got and he needs to investigate. Hulk took a Quinjet (that's a sort of plane) and dropped off the radar soon after."
Okay, so now we're an half hour into the movie, shall we take a small break to let it all sink in and then we come back here in like 10 minutes so we can see where it goes from here?
And hand everyone cheatsheets at the entrance so they can look up who the big guy with blonde hairs and billowing red cape is again.