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I'm 2 years sober today

Kev Kev

Gold Member
Oct 25, 2012
3,681
6,801
1,050
How often did you drink when you were on the wagon? How bad did it get? Were you functional or did you drink so much you'd get sick and blank out a lot? Just curious because I struggled with alcohol for a while.
started drinking around 13 or 14, but didnt have regular access till 16. between 16 and 22 i drank a few times a week. it was pretty normal drinking for that age, i really didnt have any problems other than a bad hangover.

i was working at a liquor store around 22 when i started to take shots and pound beers by myself after work. it a near everyday ritual. then i started taking shots right before i left work, then i started doing them during work (just a couple 99 bananas usually, maybe another two later on, if it was a night shift). i did that pretty regularly, but i had a girlfriend at the time who wasnt crazy about my drinking so it wasnt every single day.

somewhere in there my gf dumped me and i started drinking pretty much everyday. i was about 25 at this point. eventually i graduated to a half pint (200ml) of vodka, and i'd usually drink a 32 oz miller high life with that. then i dropped the beer and was a pretty steady 2 half pint of vodka every afternoon. keep in mind thats 400ml. a bottle of vodka is 750ml. so bascially, i drank a half a bottle of vodka every afternoon from age 25 to 27.

eventually i graduated up to a whole bottle every afternoon for a year and a half or so (this was when it was at its worst). i didnt always quite drink the whole bottle though, and would often finish it first thing the next morning to help me feel a little better (although you dont get bad hangovers when you drink that much that regularly.... you just kinda feel like crap 24/7 lol). sometimes i even drink as much as 1L of vodka if i had the whole day off and started in the morning.

it was by this point that i was drinking all day every starting in the morning. however, i did have a full time job and i never drank or was drunk at work. that may be the biggest reason why i didnt get more physically addicted than i did. but when i wasnt at work, it was drinkin time

sometime around28 or 29 i started to slow down. i'd qwuit for months at a time and pick it back up. start, stop, start, stop... just like that for a few more years, then july 1st 2018 i finally did it. i tried and failed a million times though. the key was to never give up (lol like the asian man in the video lol)

as far as how bad it got... i lived like in fifth all the time bc i was too hammered to clean anything, my health was god awful, i broke my phone at some point and just went without a cell phone for 6 months bc i didnt care or was too drunk to go through with the process of getting it fixed or getting a new one, i was driving drunk all the fucking time and just in general i was a POS and i knew it and i hated myself and i wanted to die, lol. so yeah it got bad.

sick? uuuhhh no not really. when you drink as much as i did, you dont get too drunk or sick, you dont get the spins anymore, youdont even get hangovers really. the worst that would happen is i would throw up sometimes in the middle of the next day but other than just generally feeling like shit all the time lol no i didnt get sick often

and yes i would get black out drunk every night. if i was drinking iw as blackin out. one time i woke up in the bathroom with no clothes on (i lived with a room mate at the time lol). another time i came to on the back porch and when i went inside the house was trashed. guess i went off on a tear or something. i dunno. it was insane
 
Last edited:

Grinchy

Banned
Aug 3, 2010
27,720
19,105
1,305
a cave outside of Whoville.
Nice work!

I feel very lucky that I hate alcohol. My first time getting smashed drunk was when I was like 15. I partied really hard in high school and for like 4-5 years after. But by the time I was like 23ish, I was just done. I don't know what happened, but it's like a switch was flipped. Suddenly the feeling of being drunk just makes me think of being sweaty, swampy, and tired with spending the next day wanting to puke. And I think this is lucky as hell, because I easily could have turned into an alcoholic if I had kept drinking.

Friends I used to party with all the time still drink hard and regularly to this day. I just can't be around it anymore. When you're 22 and getting kicked out of a bar for acting like an idiot while you're drunk, it's expected. When you're 36 and proud of getting kicked out of the bar for acting like a drunk idiot, it's pathetic.
 

TheContact

Gold Member
Jan 22, 2016
6,517
6,208
860
started drinking around 13 or 14, but didnt have regular access till 16. between 16 and 22 i drank a few times a week. it was pretty normal drinking for that age, i really didnt have any problems other than a bad hangover.

i was working at a liquor store around 22 when i started to take shots and pound beers by myself after work. it a near everyday ritual. then i started taking shots right before i left work, then i started doing them during work (just a couple 99 bananas usually, maybe another two later on, if it was a night shift). i did that pretty regularly, but i had a girlfriend at the time who wasnt crazy about my drinking so it wasnt every single day.

somewhere in there my gf dumped me and i started drinking pretty much everyday. i was about 25 at this point. eventually i graduated to a half pint (200ml) of vodka, and i'd usually drink a 32 oz miller high life with that. then i dropped the beer and was a pretty steady 2 half pint of vodka every afternoon. keep in mind thats 400ml. a bottle of vodka is 750ml. so bascially, i drank a half a bottle of vodka every afternoon from age 25 to 27.

eventually i graduated up to a whole bottle every afternoon for a year and a half or so (this was when it was at its worst). i didnt always quite drink the whole bottle though, and would often finish it first thing the next morning to help me feel a little better (although you dont get bad hangovers when you drink that much that regularly.... you just kinda feel like crap 24/7 lol). sometimes i even drink as much as 1L of vodka if i had the whole day off and started in the morning.

it was by this point that i was drinking all day every starting in the morning. however, i did have a full time job and i never drank or was drunk at work. that may be the biggest reason why i didnt get more physically addicted than i did. but when i wasnt at work, it was drinkin time

sometime around28 or 29 i started to slow down. i'd qwuit for months at a time and pick it back up. start, stop, start, stop... just like that for a few more years, then july 1st 2018 i finally did it. i tried and failed a million times though. the key was to never give up (lol like the asian man in the video lol)

as far as how bad it got... i lived like in fifth all the time bc i was too hammered to clean anything, my health was god awful, i broke my phone at some point and just went without a cell phone for 6 months bc i didnt care or was too drunk to go through with the process of getting it fixed or getting a new one, i was driving drunk all the fucking time and just in general i was a POS and i knew it and i hated myself and i wanted to die, lol. so yeah it got bad.

sick? uuuhhh no not really. when you drink as much as i did, you dont get too drunk or sick, you dont get the spins anymore, youdont even get hangovers really. the worst that would happen is i would throw up sometimes in the middle of the next day but other than just generally feeling like shit all the time lol no i didnt get sick often

and yes i would get black out drunk every night. if i was drinking iw as blackin out. one time i woke up in the bathroom with no clothes on (i lived with a room mate at the time lol). another time i came to on the back porch and when i went inside the house was trashed. guess i went off on a tear or something. i dunno. it was insane

Damn that's crazy. Good for you for your 2 years. Did you do AA or what was the factor that made you look at what was happening and decide you needed to stop?
 

Cycom

Banned
Mar 5, 2020
1,050
1,936
475
Los Angeles, Commiefornia
I was never an addict, but I had serious issues with certain substances in my late teens/early 20’s. I wasted many years on “fun,” not realizing at the time how foolish I was.

I am now in my late 30’s. Wife and 4 kids. Wouldn’t trade my life for anyone else’s.

For those of you looking to quit smoking read the book Allen Carr’s Easy Way to Quit Smoking. I used this to quit cold turkey without any issues (no joke!) over 10 years ago. It really works. For those of you struggling with addiction I sincerely hope that you escape it.
 

Kev Kev

Gold Member
Oct 25, 2012
3,681
6,801
1,050
Damn that's crazy. Good for you for your 2 years. Did you do AA or what was the factor that made you look at what was happening and decide you needed to stop?
thank you! no AA, although i've heard that is extremely helpful for some people, it just wasn't for me.

there were so many factors for me wanting to stop. health, money, family, friendships, relationships... everything really. it negatively effects every part of your life bc your always fucking loaded lol.

if i had to pick a number one reason (this is going to get really cheesy lol)... i had a writing teacher somewhere in those years (i was in and out of school through all that, im actually finishing up my last class to finally get that AA this summer! only 5 weeks away) and he taught me how to analyze stories and characters, something id never done. i usually just took a story at face value and walked away form it never considering it. sometimes, id even walk away totally confused about what the hell the movie was about. i was just really really bad at analysis lol. its because i was aloof! i was oblivious to the world around, the good or the bad, just all of it. i was a dumby and never considered anything other than me and the next 5 seconds of my life. i couldnt see the big picture.

then he taught me how to analyze my own character and my own story and blah blah blah. he was so cool too. he was this big, tall, old black guy who was chill af and wore a cool but-at-the-same-time-kinda-funny-looking hat. he would say things like he loved us and he wanted to see us be successful (which was weird at first, but then it started to feel really nice, if that makes sense), and he taught us how to open our eyes to the beautiful things in life and find our calling. it was truly an amazing experience and the biggest factor in me starting to turn things around. since then ive been able to analyze all things better. movies, music, television, my life, other peoples lives... you name, he really helped me open my eyes and be able to read between the lines.. it was a valuable experience on many levels.

i remember during one of his particularly inspirational lectures, he got down to the point he was trying to make about how we all have some kind of hurt in our hearts, and for whatever reason he looked me dead in the eye and simply said "it's ok." cheesy i know, but i'll never forget that, and i always remember it when ever im getting frustrated or feel like a failure.
 

Patriots7

Member
Jul 15, 2008
3,264
571
1,100
Congrats OP!

I hate my drinking. 2015-2019 was really absurd.

Would love to commit to sobriety, but not there yet. Managed to cut it out during the week, which has been really helpful for my state of mind. Hopefully the first step towards full sobriety.
 

Kev Kev

Gold Member
Oct 25, 2012
3,681
6,801
1,050
thanks for all the love GAF! you guys are amazing. other online communities don't hold a candle to this one. i really appreciate all the congrats and support from each and every one of you. 😌🙏

i created a Sober OT over on communities side. feel free to come share your stories and support. don't be afraid to open up the vault, it's a judgement free topic after all.

 

The Scrivener

Member
Oct 21, 2014
2,996
3,043
840
Last time I drank I got so drunk I couldn't drive the next day to take the kids to see Toy Story 4 with the tickets I prepaid for, lol the guilt. (I made up for it the following week lol.)

That was about a year ago. As a Buddhist, I also had a long period of abstinence in my early to late twenties. It was a woman that started it up again both times. I'm weak.

Alcohol fucked me up too many times, too many mistakes, too many secrets. Don't drink, it's a waste.

Now I forcefully don't drink, I mean, I make sure I say no. Well done Kev mate.
 

DeepBreath87

Member
Jun 15, 2019
3,340
6,732
595
Congrats. I'm at 20 months from all substances. Alcohol wasn't my first choice (opiates), but like many people, it was my fall back option. I didn't spend a full week completely sober from the time I was 19 until I was 31. Its a great thing. I haven't been in this good of a place mentally in a solid decade. And physically I'm at at least as good a place as I've been since I was about 22. Keep it going. Whatever is working for you, keep doing it.
 

Ememee

Member
Apr 6, 2020
498
1,015
395
Great fucking job man. Coincidentally, on God, today is my 2 years and 6 months of being sober lol.

I saw a lot of similarities in what you said. I didn’t go to AA. I thought if anything it’d make me want to drink more.

And I only planned to go 2 years clean (I originally did it for my ex and we ended things in November) but..still here. Still clean. I never tell myself “YOU CAN NEVER DRINK AGAIN!!!” But at the same time, I have no desire to. So I still don’t.

Won’t lie, quarantine’s been rough and I’ve actually began considering AA. Not just to vent but truly to listen to others.

Thanks for making that community, I’ll check it out. And keep up the good fight, man.
 

Kev Kev

Gold Member
Oct 25, 2012
3,681
6,801
1,050
Great fucking job man. Coincidentally, on God, today is my 2 years and 6 months of being sober lol.

I saw a lot of similarities in what you said. I didn’t go to AA. I thought if anything it’d make me want to drink more.

And I only planned to go 2 years clean (I originally did it for my ex and we ended things in November) but..still here. Still clean. I never tell myself “YOU CAN NEVER DRINK AGAIN!!!” But at the same time, I have no desire to. So I still don’t.

Won’t lie, quarantine’s been rough and I’ve actually began considering AA. Not just to vent but truly to listen to others.

Thanks for making that community, I’ll check it out. And keep up the good fight, man.
thank you so much, and hey you too man! i hear AA can be awesome. if youre considering it id recommend definitely checking it out. worse that happens is you waste an evening with nice people who just want to promote positivity and lift your spirits. kind of a win win i think. good luck to you!
 

DeepBreath87

Member
Jun 15, 2019
3,340
6,732
595
Great fucking job man. Coincidentally, on God, today is my 2 years and 6 months of being sober lol.

I saw a lot of similarities in what you said. I didn’t go to AA. I thought if anything it’d make me want to drink more.

And I only planned to go 2 years clean (I originally did it for my ex and we ended things in November) but..still here. Still clean. I never tell myself “YOU CAN NEVER DRINK AGAIN!!!” But at the same time, I have no desire to. So I still don’t.

Won’t lie, quarantine’s been rough and I’ve actually began considering AA. Not just to vent but truly to listen to others.

Thanks for making that community, I’ll check it out. And keep up the good fight, man.
Don’t be too scared of AA. I heard the “cult” stuff for years and wrote it off, but that was a mistake. There’s a real variety of meetings and maybe you can find a good group that helps you. My experience has been almost totally positive. I’m not hardcore about it, but it’s a good vibe most of the time.
 
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Halo is Dead

Member
May 20, 2018
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Kev Kev

Gold Member
Oct 25, 2012
3,681
6,801
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Don’t be too scared of AA. I heard the “cult” stuff for years and wrote it off, but that was a mistake. There’s a real variety of meetings and maybe you can find a good group that helps you. My experience has been almost totally positive. I’m not hardcore about it, but it’s a good vibe most of the time.
agreed. ive heard a lot of good stories about AA. i always say, if youre seriously considering going, then do it bc you have nothing to lose. im pretty sure that you dont even have to talk if you dont want to, but it can really help to be there and just listen to other stories.
 
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ClanOfNone

Member
Nov 24, 2018
1,174
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535
I credit AA for my recovery, it was the absolute last thing that I tried and it was the only one that worked.
You really do have to search for a group/sponsor that is a good fit for you though. I let religious hang ups keep me from it for a long time. A lot of AA'ers are really into faith, and that's fine. As my sponsor used to say, "Take what you need and leave the rest in the rooms."
I didn't find god in AA, but I did find sobriety and a MUCH better insight into myself and the disease of addiction.
 
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