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This is how I feel too, though I think Nintendo does have part of the blame. The parental controls should be a bit more comprehensive, and they must have a proper account system in place.It's unfortunate, but this is hardly Nintendo's fault. The 3DS has parental control functions to restrict all kinds of activity, as do the other handhelds and consoles. The same thing could happen on any of them, or Facebook or similar social networking sites, but you don't see those shutting down.
It was right of them to shut down the service to prevent future problems, but it shouldn't be shut down forever. They need to bite the bullet and do what they should of done years ago and put systems in place to make sure that the console isn't so easy to abuse for nefarious purposes.