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My sister the Playboy Playmate needs YOUR help!

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nubbe said:
Debuting at 14 isnt that early.. maybe in the Americats
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Right. Only place where debutting at 14 isn't that early is in Brazil, and that place is ****ing wild man.

Count Dookkake said:
Protip: Most girls have more access to sex than most boys. Just because you weren't/aren't getting any, doesn't mean everyone else is following suit.

Dick train? Quite an imagination you have there.
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What the hell does that have to do with 14?

Nothing.
 
She's hot, but I seriously hope she never becomes a Playmate. These days, playmates have to have ridiculously big implants. Which suck. In fact, so does Playboy.

Good luck to any modelling career, she's a great looking girl, but stay away from the implant Playmates.
 
JayDubya said:
Those "Mensa" questions were very, very easy. If you're going to brag about your intelligence, the least you can do is know what 12^2, 15^2, and 40^2 are, or be able to figure out that 2 typists typing 2 pages in 2 minutes equals a rate of 1 page per typist per minute so if you want 18 pages in a third of the time, you'd need 3 times as many typists.
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:lol

You have the right answer but the wrong logic. Its 1 typist types 1 page in two minutes, not one.
 
Whenever I see the word "Mensa" I always think "stupid" because that's what the word means in spanish, I bet those geniuses never thought about it.

Oh yeah, she's hot.
 
Count Dookkake said:
Hey, guys, my little sister, Haydn Porter, is in the running for some modelling contest. It would be supercool if you could vote for her everyday for the next week or so until the contest ends. It only takes a few seconds of your time. Here is the link.

In case you would like to see more of Haydn, you can pick up the latest issue of Playboy College Girls edition, or if you can still find a copy, get the one with the Anna Nicole tribute. You can look for more pics and information about her on HowardStern.com and myspace.

BTW she is a gamer, is a sci-fi/horror fan, thinks farts are funny and is in Mensa. She prefers talking to nerds and geeks.

Thanks for any and all help.
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You want to sleep with her, don't you?
 
LakeEarth said:
:lol
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The question was ''If 2 typists can type 2 pages in 2 minutes, how many typists will it take to type 18 pages in 6 minutes
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What?

or be able to figure out that 2 typists typing 2 pages in 2 minutes equals a rate of 1 page per typist per minute, so if you want 18 pages in a third of the time, you'd need 3 times as many typists.
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Let's see... maybe I ****ed up.

Okay, so I've got 2 typists typing 2 pages in 2 minutes.

If I had 1 typist working, he would make... 1 page in 2 minutes. Yeah, oops.

Gonna keep working, lol. Guess I'd have gotten buttslapped too.:lol

Edit: So my original answer was just flat-out wrong. So I guess it'd be with each typist having 3 times the amount in the setup (1 page per typist per 2 minutes, each typist would be able to churn out 3 pages in 6 minutes, so I'd need 6 typists, each typing at a rate of 1 page per 2 minutes to be able to make 18 pages in 6 minutes.

And that's with the ability to type out my logic AND be corrected by someone AND not being on radio AND not having the threat of punishment. So, yeah, withdrawing my smarmyness.
 
the•rebel said:
What's worse is her "supposed" brother is pimping her, so he can gain indirect access to the world of playboy.
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Obviously.

Use the little sister as a trojan horse to be in the same room with other playmates.
 
PleoMax said:
Obviously.

Use the little sister as a trojan horse to be in the same room with other playmates.
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Why are you trying so hard to troll this thread?

And I can't believe some of you are so gullible to believe everything that girls say on the Howard Stern show. If you are going on there to market yourself, you give the audience exactly what they want to hear.
 
She's pretty cute alright, I guess the whole thing about the gaming, geeky vibe, lightsabers etc. helps a lot too. At least in my opinion.
 
l_b9343d91ea4cfd1050e4ea1fc6326019.jpg


i like!
 
JayDubya said:
Those "Mensa" questions were very, very easy. If you're going to brag about your intelligence, the least you can do is know what 12^2, 15^2, and 40^2 are
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144
225
1600
 
PleoMax said:
On top of her.
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:lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

Wow I'm gonna get fired for laughing so hard...
 
Vyse The Legend said:
Just because you are a prude doesn't mean others have to be also.
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I don't think you need to be a prude to think having sex with 4 guys from age 14 is something approaching 'promiscuous.'

edit: covered
 
I can't even comprehend how eternally ****ed up I'd be if I had a sister who appeared on the Howard Stern show.

I mean... yeah... at least Playboy has some subtlety. Howard Stern is just; what's your favorite position, can you squirt, ok now let's watch you cum on a sex machine.

I don't know about the rest of you but I like to pretend that my entire family is completely sexually oblivious. It's better for my psyche.
 
OK WTF HANG ON - If I had a sister who publically announced that she lost her virginity at 14, HAD HAD SEX WITH OLDER WOMEN BEFORE SHE WAS 18 and used an automatic spanking machine on the Howard Stern show...

I WOULD BLOW MY EFFING BRAINS OUT.

OH MY GOD WTFFFFF MY MIND IS MELTING 8&^(&X^&Z*HXCF
 
Yixian said:
I can't even comprehend how eternally ****ed up I'd be if I had a sister who appeared on the Howard Stern show.

I mean... yeah... at least Playboy has some subtlety. Howard Stern is just; what's your favorite position, can you squirt, ok now let's watch you cum on a sex machine.

I don't know about the rest of you but I like to pretend that my entire family is completely sexually oblivious. It's better for my psyche.
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Then you hear your parents doing it in the bathroom, and see cellphone pics of your sister having lesbian sex, and it messes your fragile psyche up pretty much for life.
 
mr jones said:
Then you hear your parents doing it in the bathroom, and see cellphone pics of your sister having lesbian sex, and it messes your fragile psyche up pretty much for life.
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o_________________O

Holy shit my I think my brain just CRASHED. I want to destroy the internet and pretend I never read this. I cannot contain the jealousy/arousal/incomprehension that this information is causing me.

JUST IMAGINE YOURSELF as the OP, and think to yourself "my sister had lesbian sex with older women before she was 18" "my sister had lesbian sex with older women before she was 18" "my sister had lesbian sex with older women before she was 18"...

THIS SHIT ISN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN IN RL! It's TOO hot for the laws of goddamn physics. This is only supposed to happen in bullcrap erotic fiction. WTFFFF O.O>OO.O

I think I'm gonna explode.
 
DoctorWho said:
Wow, there is a girl who looks a lot like her who I'm going to ask out. Funny thing is, she is also a nude model.
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It is her
 
Count Dookkake said:
Hey, guys, my little sister, Haydn Porter, is in the running for some modelling contest. It would be supercool if you could vote for her everyday for the next week or so until the contest ends. It only takes a few seconds of your time. Here is the link.

In case you would like to see more of Haydn, you can pick up the latest issue of Playboy College Girls edition, or if you can still find a copy, get the one with the Anna Nicole tribute. You can look for more pics and information about her on HowardStern.com and myspace.

BTW she is a gamer, is a sci-fi/horror fan, thinks farts are funny and is in Mensa. She prefers talking to nerds and geeks.

Thanks for any and all help.
Click to expand...

I'll vote, but somehow if this thread had been started by DoomBringer it would have been an epic roller-coaster with no end in sight (see the old Bermuda Triangle one :lol) ;).
 
Count Dookkake said:
I understand that there are many liars and charlatans on the web, so check Haydn's myspace page for a secret message to GAFers.

Look under the "about me" section.
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Your sister had lesbian sex with older women before she was 18. Your sister had lesbian sex with older women before she was 18. Your sister had lesbian sex with older women before she was 18.

Do you comprehend this? How can you continue to function with this knowledge? I mean wha... ho... why...

I need an emergency lobotomy QUICK.
 
I'm calling bullshit, actually. Am i the first in the thread to call bullshit? I mean... really. Somethign doesn't seem right here.
 
whytemyke said:
I'm calling bullshit, actually. Am i the first in the thread to call bullshit? I mean... really. Somethign doesn't seem right here.
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Read her SECRET MESSAGE on her myspace!

Either we're talking directly to Haydn herself posing as her brother, or he has access to her myspace, or she really is his sister...

Either way, it's sad for someone.
 
RubxQub said:
Read her SECRET MESSAGE on her myspace!

Either we're talking directly to Haydn herself posing as her brother, or he has access to her myspace, or she really is his sister...

Either way, it's sad for someone.
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OR he just stole a bunch of pictures of a pretty girl and has setup this elaborate myspace.

I've actually heard the name Haydn Porter before. I just can't remember where.
 
Haydn said that she would do stuff with girls in front of guys and it was kind of a threesome thing.
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How are you people not losing your minds over this? Just imagine if you knew that, and she was your sister.

JUST IMAGINE if your sister admitted to having a THREESOME, with guys AND girls, before she was 18.

*repeatedly smashes head against keyboard in the desperate attempt to lose consciousness*

This sort of thing is only supposed to happen in latin american coming of age movies, not in rl :(((
 
whytemyke said:
I'm calling bullshit, actually. Am i the first in the thread to call bullshit? I mean... really. Somethign doesn't seem right here.
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Besides the fact that it seems strange for her brother to be pimping his sister in this way. It is great that he wants her to win the contest but he is subjecting her to the GAF masses.

That is the sound of thousands of gaffers fapping in unison.
 
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