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[FoneBone]

So, I finally start college in 2 and a half weeks (thank god). My roommate and I have exchanged a few emails, but I still haven't discussed this with him -- I feel a little uncomfortable doing it, and I also feel there might be something somewhat homophobic about needing to "warn" him. On the other hand, I'd like to spare any awkward moments.

Bear in mind that (a) the college in question is an extremely liberal New England liberal arts school, and I'd certainly hope that he'd have chosen another school if this would be a problem for him, and (b) I'm not staying in the closet -- if he asks me point-blank (or asks if I have a girlfriend), I'll tell him. But I'd appreciate some advice.

 

[BigGreenMat]

I say don't mention it until you have to.

 

[human5892]

Go with the policy of the Army -- don't ask, don't tell. It's none of his business, anyhow, unless you're bringing back guys to the room and he's uncomfortable with that.

 

[White Man]

I'd wait until you meet him, then assess the situation from there.

I know you're probably wondering how he'll react, but when I meet a person, then am immediately told 'Hi, I'm gay!' I begin to wonder how much of his personality is based upon his sexuality. In my book, being gay should be the least interesting thing about a person.

Assess the situation. I'd just tell him when it comes up. It inevitably will.

 

[ge-man]

I agree with everyone who said wait until it comes up. You might make things just as awkard by stating the issue ahead of time, even if you mean well.

 

[human5892]

After a few days with him just creep up on him when is he sleeping and start kissing his chest. That was the way my roommate broke it to me and we have been together for four years since.

Hahaha!!!

 

[Tool]

Shouldn't be an issue and you shouldn't have to mention it unless he asks. Would you feel weird if the roommate sends you an email saying "Hey by the way I'm heterosexual!" If he's hung up about your sexuality then fuck him. Well, not literally.

 

[myzhi]

I disagree with the previous posters. You should tell him now, because 1) you guys don't really know each other yet, so no complications can come out of it. 2) Your room mate can make other preparations if he's uncomfortable. Telling him later maybe too late.

 

[Tool]

I disagree with the previous posters. You should tell him now, because 1) you guys don't really know each other yet, so no complications can come out of it. 2) Your room mate can make other preparations if he's uncomfortable. Telling him later maybe too late.

Again, why should it be an issue for homosexual people if it's not an issue for heterosexual people? It's as if by telling him ahead of time you are admitting that something is wrong with your sexual preference and if he doesn't like it he can find another roommate.

 

[FoneBone]

Shouldn't be an issue and you shouldn't have to mention it unless he asks. Would you feel weird if the roommate sends you an email saying "Hey by the way I'm heterosexual!"

Yeah, that's how I thought about it. I mean, if I were going to a school where there were really a strong possibility of him being a fundie or something, I might want to act differently, but in this case, I think it really should be his problem, not mine.

 

[Drinky Crow]

FHUTA

 

[human5892]

I disagree with the previous posters. You should tell him now, because 1) you guys don't really know each other yet, so no complications can come out of it. 2) Your room mate can make other preparations if he's uncomfortable. Telling him later maybe too late.

But that's just it -- why should he be uncomfortable, unless FoneBone is having gay sex in front of his face (and whether you're gay or heterosexual, it's really common courtesy not to have sex in front of your roomate, anyway)? There's no reason to bring it up. It's really just asking for a possibly uncomfortable situation.

 

[Rocket Punch]

It really depends on how comfortable you are in the end. A few things to consider: do you plan on dating while in college? bringing guys over for the night? how out are you right now?

It helps if you know the person before hand. That way they realize - as should be - that you're more than just the "gay guy" and get to know you by your personality instead of pre-judgements. It definitely helps a great deal if you have shared interest and can be friends. That is, just friends. Besides who's to say he himself is not gay? I would have to say though, the earlier you tell him the better for the two of you.

 

[myzhi]

Again, why should it be an issue for homosexual people if it's not an issue for heterosexual people? It's as if by telling him ahead of time you are admitting that something is wrong with your sexual preference and if he doesn't like it he can find another roommate.

Look, it may not be an issue for you, but it maybe an issue for his room mate. Better to found out now, then being stuck with someone for a full year. Hate to break it to you, but in the real world, not everyone thinks the same.

 

[human5892]

Look, it may not be an issue for you, but it maybe an issue for his room mate.

Then it's his roomate's problem, not his.

Plus, if the issue is never brought up, how can it be a problem for either of them?

 

[myzhi]

But that's just it -- why should he be uncomfortable, unless FoneBone is having gay sex in front of his face (and whether you're gay or heterosexual, it's really common courtesy not to have sex in front of your roomate, anyway)? There's no reason to bring it up. It's really just asking for a possibly uncomfortable situation.

Either you or I know if the he's roommate will become uncomfortable. Thus, it's best to find out as soon as possible. Like I said, if he/she is not, go ahead. If he/she is, might be better to move on.

 

[myzhi]

Then it's his roomate's problem, not his.

Plus, if the issue is never brought up, how can it be a problem for either of them?

Never said it was his problem. This way, his room mate can make other preparations, like finding a new place to stay. Unless the original poster going to hide it which he's not, it's going to come out anyway. I always believe in solving it now then later.

 

[Tool]

Either you or I know if the he's roommate will become uncomfortable. Thus, it's best to find out as soon as possible. Like I said, if he/she is not, go ahead. If he/she is, might be better to move on.

Again you're putting the onus on the homosexual roommate to conform to the other's wishes. Why is that?

 

[teiresias]

When my first college roommate was having sex with his girlfriend in the top bunk, shoving his fist in her mouth to keep her quiet and rocking the whole room while I tried to sleep on the bottom bunk I certainly had a problem with him being heterosexual.

 

[human5892]

Unless the original poster going to hide it which he's not, it's going to come out anyway. I always believing in solving it now then later.

As I said, there's nothing to "hide" unless FoneBone has sex or acts affectionately towards a guy right there in the room in front of his roomate (which again is discourteous in and of itself, regardless of sexual orientation). And if there's nothing to hide, there's no problem, and thus nothing to "solve".

EDIT: ^^^Tool and teresias each make good points as well.

 

[myzhi]

Again you're putting the onus on the homosexual roommate to conform to the other's wishes. Why is that?

Huh? I am talking about any type of room mate, nerds vs jocks, heter vs homo, race vs race, boy vs girl, and etc. Have you ever doom with someone? Probably not. If two people dislike each other, it's going to be hell for 1 year. If two people are comfortable, it would be great experience. Thus, wouldn't it be better to find out now instead of after being stuck in hell for 1 year?

 

[Tool]

When my first college roommate was having sex with his girlfriend in the top bunk, shoving his fist in her mouth to keep her quiet and rocking the whole room while I tried to sleep on the bottom bunk I certainly had a problem with him being heterosexual.

Teiresias has hit the heart of the matter. As long as neither roommate is boning their significant others in the room with the other roommate is around, there shouldn't be an issue. Sexual orientation is a private matter and shouldn't affect the relationship between the 2 roommates.

 

[Tool]

Huh? I am talking about any type of room mate, nerds vs jocks, heter vs homo, and etc. Have you ever doom with someone? Probably not. If two people dislike each other, it's going to be hell for 1 year. If two people are comfortable, it would be great experience. Thus, wouldn't it be better to find out now instead of after being stuck in hell for 1 year?

If 2 people dislike each other it could be hell yes. Are you supposed to go ahead and list out point by point everything you agree or disagree with before you move in with someone? Religion -- check.
Politics -- check.
Sexuality -- check.
Music -- check.

It gets ridiculous after a point. As long as each person respects the other's views/feelings they can co-exist. If the roommate is SO backwards and out of touch with the current world that he has a problem with homosexuality to the point where he can't live with his roommate, I'm sure you can make a switch mid-year.

 

[myzhi]

If 2 people dislike each other it could be hell yes. Are you supposed to go ahead and list out point by point everything you agree or disagree with before you move in with someone? Religion -- check.
Politics -- check.
Sexuality -- check.
Music -- check.

It gets ridiculous after a point. As long as each person respects the other's views/feelings they can co-exist. If the roommate is SO backwards and out of touch with the current world that he has a problem with homosexuality to the point where he can't live with his roommate, I'm sure you can make a switch mid-year.

I give up arguing with someone who thinks my way or the highway w/o consider other people's feelings.

To the original poster, I wish you best in with your room mate search.

 

[xsarien]

I'd wait awhile, and then either drop enough hints that he figures it out for himself, or tell him once you get to know each other a little better. There are few more awkward feelings in the world than meeting a college roommate for the first time, that goes double if you're a frosh. (And no, talking via e-mail doesn't count as "meeting.")

It'll just be easier for the two of you if the first thing you don't talk about is sexual orientation.

 

[Tool]

I give up arguing with someone who thinks my way or the highway w/o consider other people's feelings.

To the original poster, I wish you best in with your room mate search.

There's a difference between considering another person's feelings and not being able to accept something as fundamental as sexual orientation. Again, WHY should the onus be on the homosexual roommate to give his potential roommate a "heads-up" warning? If the one roommate is SO hung up about homosexuality HE should be the one to say "hey I can't deal with homosexuals so please let me know if you are one, I want a heterosexual roommate".

 

[ConfusingJazz]

When my first college roommate was having sex with his girlfriend in the top bunk, shoving his fist in her mouth to keep her quiet and rocking the whole room while I tried to sleep on the bottom bunk I certainly had a problem with him being heterosexual.

I believe at this point you are allowed to make a total ass out of yourself. Plus, if you did it, hilarity would ensue.

 

[Escape Goat]

I am moving into a new apartment this fall and so far out of the 3 bedrooms in this unit I'm the only one there. A guy contacted me via email and was wondering about rooming together. Since I had to live with this guy for an entire year and since I was the only one there I went ahead and told him I was gay and that if he has issues with that then maybe he should reconsidering the arrangement. I haven't heard from him since.

I came to be pretty good friends with my roommate last year and I almost ended up telling him towards the end of the semester. Hes Catholic but not a very good one and he was always one to use the word "gay" or "fag" to downplay someone.

I wouldn't say anyhting about it. I agree with Teirseisias. If he is going to have a problem wiht it, let him get to know you first. Saying "I'm gay" before he's even met you may scare him.

 

[myzhi]

There's a difference between considering another person's feelings and not being able to accept something as fundamental as sexual orientation. Again, WHY should the onus be on the homosexual roommate to give his potential roommate a "heads-up" warning? If the one roommate is SO hung up about homosexuality HE should be the one to say "hey I can't deal with homosexuals so please let me know if you are one, I want a heterosexual roommate".

Look. When having room mates, it's best to solve any uncomfortable situation now rather then later. Lets say I like to walk around naked. Would it not be best for me to bring it up now then see the shock in my room mate's face? You don't have to talk about everything just common sense stuff that may cause problems. And, since the original poster senses a possible problem, he should say it.

 

[Seth C]

Again, why should it be an issue for homosexual people if it's not an issue for heterosexual people? It's as if by telling him ahead of time you are admitting that something is wrong with your sexual preference and if he doesn't like it he can find another roommate.

The straight man doesn't need to tell you he's straight because it's implied. Everyone had already assumed this guy's roomate will be (though he may not be). It's not an admission that you're doing something wrong, but he DOES have a choice of whether he wants to live with you (or anyone else) for ANY reason. He CAN find another roomate, and if he has an issue with this, right or wrong, he should!

Why should it be an issue? Because it IS an issue, whether you'd like to think it isn't or not. People have insecurities. Like it or not, some they can't help, but they're there anyway. It's not homophobic, it's just life. It would be a completely different issue if this involved sharing an apartment, because then both people have their own private space, but I assume this is a dorm room. Two guys sharing a 12' by 10' room isn't going to be a good situation no matter what. Some guys just might find it a little more uncomfortable knowing their roomate, say, is having sexual fantasies about them while they're getting dressed. Do you ever plan to have a guy over and cuddle watching a movie? Probably. Maybe kiss? Probably. I can tell you this much, your roomate expects to do those things in his room with the person of his choice. Better to tell the potential roomate now and just avoid the potential akward situation completely. It's not wrong if he's not comfortable with it. You can find a roomate that is, and isn't that really the better situation anyway? Worse yet, what if he IS homophobic? Hell, what if he'd be downright disgusted by it? Do you want to be living with him in that situation? Telling him in advance is potentially a good thing for both of you.

To qualify all this, let me tell you that I myself roomed with a guy who was very flamboyantly gay. He never once admitted it to me, despite the fact that it was obvious. In fact, he hid it from me (denying it when brought up, calling his lover a "good friend"). I would have certainly appreciated it if, sometime early on, he had said "Hey Seth, before I move in, I want you to know I'm gay, and I hope you're cool with that." I would have said it was fine, and that would have been that. Instead we spent four months of him hiding it, and me feeling a little betrayed because the person I shared a 10' by 12' space with wasn't even being honest with me. Let me also say that it isn't going to be easy for a straight guy sharing a room with a gay guy in a mens dorm. The entire world isn't okay with homosexuality. There will be enough guys in the dorm that aren't to make things a pain for the straight guy. Rarely a day went by that someone didn't (jokingly or not) ask me if Andrew had "had me up the ass." "Are you sure? Maybe you just don't remember it. Have you been having headaches? He could have chloroformed you." Haha...yeah, funny. It's not RIGHT, but it will happen, and it's not something just you will have to deal with. If anyone suspects you of being gay, your roomate will deal with it, too.

On the whole, I think it was a good learning experience for me. I think he deserves to choose for himself though.

 

[human5892]

Look. When having room mates, it's best to solve any uncomfortable situation now rather then later. Lets say I like to walk around naked. Would it not be best for me to bring it up now then see the shock in my room mate's face? You don't have to talk about every about yourself just common sense stuff that may cause problems. And, since the original poster senses a possible problem, he should say it.

You really don't understand.

Like it or not, some they can't help, but they're there anyway. It's not homophobic, it's just life.

Oh! So like...it's not racism, it's just life!

 

[Seth C]

There's a difference between considering another person's feelings and not being able to accept something as fundamental as sexual orientation. Again, WHY should the onus be on the homosexual roommate to give his potential roommate a "heads-up" warning? If the one roommate is SO hung up about homosexuality HE should be the one to say "hey I can't deal with homosexuals so please let me know if you are one, I want a heterosexual roommate".

Because, as I said above, the assumption going in is that all parties are straight. The potential roomate is thinking that about FoneBone, and just to prove the point, FoneBone (a gay man) is assuming the same thing about the roomate! It's not an issue of what SHOULD be, but rather what IS. Arguing that it shouldn't be this way won't help anything. For now, the assumption, and the potential uncomfortableness, are there. Only time will change that. We can't change the assumption, but we can cope with it.

 

[Tool]

Look. When having room mates, it's best to solve any uncomfortable situation now rather then later. Lets say I like to walk around naked. Would it not be best for me to bring it up now then see the shock in my room mate's face? You don't have to talk about every about yourself just common sense stuff that may cause problems. And, since the original poster senses a possible problem, he should say it.

I believe I've made my point. If the heterosexual roommate can't deal with it, and he KNOWS he can't deal with it, HE should be making the effort to find a heterosexual roommate. I believe people are smart enough these days to know that there's always the chance you'll get a roomate who is not the same orientation as you. If the person has a problem with that he should make that known. The homosexual roomate is trying to take a pro-active approach and do the work of the homofearing roommate for him -- he shouldn't have to. The hetero roommate should know the potential is there beforehand and deal with it somehow.

 

[FoneBone]

I should add that I'm pretty sure the dorm is coed (individual rooms, of course, are not ).

Also, as for the hypothetical "roommate crush" situation that some are suggesting, I'll deal with if it comes up (and I very much hope it doesn't). At this point, though, that's obviously beyond my control.

 

[Escape Goat]

Some guys just might find it a little more uncomfortable knowing their roomate, say, is having sexual fantasies about them while they're getting dressed

I love how people automatically assume that since the person over there is gay they are totally undressing them with your eyes. Dont be so full of yourself. College isn't a time to quarantine yourself off into your cliques like high school. This is college as I'm sure you're aware of Seth. You said it was a learning experience and obviously for the better. People aren't going to change unless they're forced to.

And I also find it interesting how you somehow become the victim by your roommate not telling you he is gay. You obviously don't understand that gay people are protecting themselves the only way they can and unfortunately its through silence.

 

[myzhi]

I should add that I'm pretty sure the dorm is coed (individual rooms, of course, are not ).

I wish you the best with your search. Go with your gut, and tell us how it goes. The main thing is to enjoy college. Its should be one of the best times in your life. After that, full time work sux.

 

[Luscious LeftFoot]

I can kind of see the point myzhi is trying to make. You just don't know what you're getting when you dorm with someone. Yeah, you hope it turns out well, but they could be homophobic, racist, or a raving lunatic. It might be better to find out early and avoid potential problems.

But I'd think, that if someone had those sort of hang ups, they'd either make it known in the first place, or just not dorm at all.

All in all, I think most people are accepting of others. It seems what usually causes problems are the little things like cleanliness, selfishess, personality clashes etc...

 

[Seth C]

Oh! So like...it's not racism, it's just life!

And if you were black would you want to live with a racist white man? Maybe this potential roomate IS violently homphobic. Is it right? NO! Is it better to find out now as compared to later? Yes! I'm merely explaining the situation that exists in the world around us. No need to get pissy with me. Like I said, I've been there, I'm fine with it. Not everyone is. It doesn't matter if it's right or wrong. This isn't about RIGHT OR WRONG. Save that for a different thread. This is about what's best for this situation, given the reality of the world. It's not about how things would exist in a perfect society, because we don't yet live in one, and we don't have time to make ours perfect before college starts. Haha.

 

[human5892]

And if you were black would you want to live with a racist white man? Maybe this potential roomate IS violently homphobic. Is it right? NO! Is it better to find out now as compared to later? Yes! I'm merely explaining the situation that exists in the world around us. No need to get pissy with me. Like I said, I've been there, I'm fine with it. Not everyone is. It doesn't matter if it's right or wrong. This isn't about RIGHT OR WRONG. Save that for a different thread. This is about what's best for this situation, given the reality of the world. It's not about how things would exist in a perfect society, because we don't yet live in one, and we don't have time to make ours perfect before college starts. Haha.

Your original statement that I quoted was unclear; you made it sound as if someone who does not like gays should be excused because "that's just life". Of course there are people who are homophobic and racist out there -- I don't think anyone needs a "real world" lecture here. But you made it sound as if these qualities should be excused.

 

[Seth C]

I love how people automatically assume that since the person over there is gay they are totally undressing them with your eyes. Dont be so full of yourself. College isn't a time to quarantine yourself off into your cliques like high school. This is college as I'm sure you're aware of Seth. You said it was a learning experience and obviously for the better. People aren't going to change unless they're forced to.

Oh for fuck's sake. I'm not assuming since anyone is gay that they are undressing me. Hell, I don't have enough confidence to think ANYONE is undressing me with their mind (haha). BUT, is it possible that someone who is uncomfortable living in tight quarters with a gay man, or someone who is outright hompohobic, MAY think these things? Yes, it is.

As I've said many times in this thread, this isn't about making the world a better place. Yes, it was a good experience for me. You're right, people aren't going to change unless they're forced to, but not everyone is READY for change. If this roomate isn't, it's better for FoneBone to avoid the situation entirely. Better for HIMSELF.

And I also find it interesting how you somehow become the victim by your roommate not telling you he is gay. You obviously don't understand that gay people are protecting themselves the only way they can and unfortunately its through silence.

That's because I BECAME the victim right along side him. He wasn't protecting anyone, least of which me. He was plainly, obviously, flamboyantly gay. Everything about him screamd "I'm gay." Due to association with him the asses on the floor became asses to not just him, but me as well. Now, was that right? No, it wasn't. But would I have had to deal with it if I hadn't had a gay roomate? Nope. I'm not blaming it on him. It shouldn't happen. It does though, and all I asked in return was a little honesty, so at least we could go through it together.

 

[All Hail C-Webb]

If you plan on being with guys in your room, then I think that ou should tell him, if not now, definately before a "friend" comes over. If he finds out that you're gay and it's not from you, it's going to fuck up any friendship you tried to build by not telling him from the begining. He's going to think of you as a liar, and he's going to believe that you had a reason for not wanting him to know, ie. you have a crush on him (I know that's not right, but some people do think that way).

I don't think there would be any harm in telling him now. The gay rights people will say that it's not your responsibility, and that's true. It won't do you any harm to tell him though, you'll be the bigger man, and you'll avoid a potential problem.

If he does have a problem with you being gay, don't assume that he will just sit there being uncomfortable, he might do somethign about it (this is college, and there are many stupid people).

The odds are that he won't have a problem, and everyone is making a big deal over nothing. As you said, it's a liberal school, he probably knows there's a chance that his roomate might be gay, and if it was an issue for him, he would have brought it up.

As we all know from Road Rules and Real World, if he has predetermined notions about "gay people," he will quickly overcome them if you show yourself to be a good person. Since neither show has ahd a person hide his orientation for a prolonged period of time, I would advise against this cause of action. You have no clue what might happen in this situation, and if it hasn't been doine on RW or RR, there's no point in it being done.

 

[Hamfam]

Seth C represents how a straight guy would probally feel in such a situation. So if you're basing your decision solely on the wants of your new room mate, I'd take his advice.

However, you need to realise, that most people, are homophobic. It's just natural. That doesn't mean they HATE gays, it's just that they've probally never met one in their life before and would be rather nervous around them. For that reason, it's best to create a bond with someone FIRST, before coming out to them, as such homophobia could/would get in the way of a more open friendship.

So if you come out to your new roommate so early, that will more than likely probally apply to him and alot of other people around your new college (since such information is probally sure to spread --- then again, your new roommate probally won't be too likely to spread around the fact his roommate is gay)

All that taken into consideration, how out exactly are you? If this is the first time you've come out to anyone, I'd say do not do it, it needs to be more slow really. Because it's more important your confident in yourself, before you have to start dealing with how other people view you also. If you're out in real life already, then, I say just tell him, and to Hell with it.

 

[Luscious LeftFoot]

Do straight guys just naturally assume gay guys must have a crush on them? It seems to come up a lot.

I have two gay friends (well 3, but he's deep in the closet) and neither have ever hit on me... that I know of.

 

[Seth C]

When it comes right down to it, you're better of telling him now. Whether you should have to or not, the question is what's best for YOU, right? Then think of the options.

Say you do tell him, and he's fine with it. Great. He's cool, it didn't matter to him, but he appreciates you being so upfront and already feels more open with you. You've already had a bonding experience.

Say you don't tell him, but he'd have been fine with it if you had. Works out fine.

Say you do tell him, and he's not okay with it. If he's so bothered by it that he doesn't want to room with you, the burden of finding a new room/roomate is on him. But, situation avoided.

Say you don't tell him, and it bothers him. Say he finds out somehow, or you decide to tell him later. Odds are he's not psycho, so you just deal with having a crappy relationship with the single person you are around most often for a semester/year.



Right or wrong, whether you should have to or not, it seems like all the best possibilities FOR YOU involve finding out before you move in.

 

[Seth C]

Do straight guys just naturally assume gay guys must have a crush on them? It seems to come up a lot.

I have two gay friends (well 3, but he's deep in the closet) and neither have ever hit on me... that I know of.

Given the fact that it seems to be the #1 reason most homophobic guys give for being homophobic, I'd say it's pretty common. Well, that and being raped in the showers, but I think the two fears are related. That's the reason I used it myself. I've heard it a lot.

 

[All Hail C-Webb]

Do straight guys just naturally assume gay guys must have a crush on them? It seems to come up a lot.

I have two gay friends (well 3, but he's deep in the closet) and neither have ever hit on me... that I know of.

I doubt that the majority of straight people feel that way, but I assume that the majority of homophobic people do (and that's what this thread is about).

If the guy doesn't have a problem with fone being gay, then it's not going to be a problem (though telling him straight off would still be the better option, IMO).

If he is going to have a problem, then both parties involved would probably want to know in advance.

 

[Seth C]

If he is going to have a problem, then both parties involved would probably want to know in advance.

You're right, and to assume it's not going to come up at some point in the year is just being silly. I'm sure the roomate will be talking about HIS relationship(s) with his girlfriend(s). Will you not want to do the same? Or will the relationship be completely one-sided? Most roomates become fairly close, it's an oddly intimate situation actually. Like I said, I was there. I talked to my roomate about about my relationship with my girlfriend, yet he hid his from me. It's a bit of a feeling of betrayal, knowing he didn't trust me enough to do the same.

So, unless you plan to just hide it completely (which you've indicated that you don't, and I don't suggest) it's better to just get it out there now. I don't see a potential harm in doing it. I can't see a situation where it doesn't work out in your favor.

 

[Hamfam]

Would you say your biggest problem with your roommate, Seth, was that he didn't trust you enough to tell you, or that he was gay at all - and didn't tell you - so you could avoid some of the bullying you got, etc..?

What I mean is, would have you done anything different if you even had that information, or did you just want him to be honest.

 

[Tool]

It would be cool if the future roommate turns out to be gay as well, they hit it off and start a relationship, and all this talk was for naught. Keep us up to date if you and the roommate end up slamming each other.

 

[FoneBone]

I've only come out to my family. And I'm still at a point where I'm still somewhat uncomfortable around people who are openly gay. (It's just that I feel awkward, not that I'm afraid of rape or something). One of the main things I'm looking forward to about college, though, is to basically start over with my social life, and I'm hopeful that there will be others in similar positions.

For now, I'm inclined to take the majority opinion, and not bring it up for the time being.