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Tamales Suck
- Thread starter MustacheBandit_
- Start date
- Status
When I lived in the ghetto, I would have tamales once a week. The neighborhood tamale lady would make a bunch every week and vocally, rhythmically advertise them. I could hear her voice like two blocks away. They were a dollar a piece and I would buy like 10 of them at a time cause they were gone fast. That old lady and her tamales were amazing.
Thunder Monkey
Banned
Then I smoke a joint and it no longer matters that the stuff is crap.StoOgE said:
It's cheesy crap. And for my potfilled head... sometimes that's enough.
MightyHedgehog
Member
Pristine_Condition
Member
This thread has become a complete backfired fail for the OP, and everyone with an opinion worth a damn knows that tamales are delicious and proof that a loving God exists and wants us all to be happy, warm, and well-fed...IMO.
So, for those of you around the nation who want good tamales, but don't have the knowledge, ways, or means to make them yourself, and have no access to an appropriately-chubby, grandmotherly Mexican or Tex/Mex woman who can cook her ass off, here's some suggestions, from Pristine_Condition, your oft-times surly NeoGAF buddy from Texas who wishes you all a Merry Christmas:
www.pedrostamales.com
Pedro's Tamales - Lubbock, Texas
No orders on Fri. (sorry!)
Old school Tex/Mex tamales done right. The traditional pork are great, but the specialty of the house is their beef tamale, "sirloin in a shuck." Try the spicy beef, if you like spicy. It's yummy. Chicken is good too. Steam 'em up, sauce 'em up (if so inclined) and eat 'em up. When you steam them up, there is just the amount of grease you want to see, not too much, but never dry.
www.hotdamntamales.com
Hot Damn! Tamales - Ft. Worth, TX
These are your fancy, uptown, Dallas-Ft. Worth style "gourmet" tamales. Yeah, this means they aren't cheap (@ $18-$24/doz. they certainly aren't, but they do sell half-dozen quantities and samplers as well, so you can try different kinds.)
We're talking stuff like Wild Mushroom & Texas Goat Cheese, Ancho Pork Loin, Roasted Poblano with Fresh Corn, and Black Bean & Oaxaca Cheese tamales. Even their "regular" beef tamale is really a slow simmered beef tenderloin cooked with Negro Modello beer and fresh glazed onions, garlic, and Jalapeños.
Vegetarians take note, they've got you covered too. They don't use lard in their tamales either.
Both these places are Texas tamales joints, meaning, as far as the "stuffing"-to-masa ratio goes, there's more "stuffing" and a thinner masa shell than you get on a street corner in Mexico. Also, these are steamed in corn husks, not banana leaves. So keep that in mind.
I hope everyone (minus the haters, who are simply disgraceful) enjoys a tamale at least once this holiday season. I traditionally have mine as soon as my friends and I roll out of bed, hungover from New Year's Eve, usually with no sauce, just a little side of pico de gallo, and maybe a dab of sour cream on some shredded green stuff, along with Barbacoa tacos and Big Red soda.
Merry Christmas, tamales lovers (and haters too!)
So, for those of you around the nation who want good tamales, but don't have the knowledge, ways, or means to make them yourself, and have no access to an appropriately-chubby, grandmotherly Mexican or Tex/Mex woman who can cook her ass off, here's some suggestions, from Pristine_Condition, your oft-times surly NeoGAF buddy from Texas who wishes you all a Merry Christmas:
www.pedrostamales.com
Pedro's Tamales - Lubbock, Texas
No orders on Fri. (sorry!)
Old school Tex/Mex tamales done right. The traditional pork are great, but the specialty of the house is their beef tamale, "sirloin in a shuck." Try the spicy beef, if you like spicy. It's yummy. Chicken is good too. Steam 'em up, sauce 'em up (if so inclined) and eat 'em up. When you steam them up, there is just the amount of grease you want to see, not too much, but never dry.
www.hotdamntamales.com
Hot Damn! Tamales - Ft. Worth, TX
These are your fancy, uptown, Dallas-Ft. Worth style "gourmet" tamales. Yeah, this means they aren't cheap (@ $18-$24/doz. they certainly aren't, but they do sell half-dozen quantities and samplers as well, so you can try different kinds.)
We're talking stuff like Wild Mushroom & Texas Goat Cheese, Ancho Pork Loin, Roasted Poblano with Fresh Corn, and Black Bean & Oaxaca Cheese tamales. Even their "regular" beef tamale is really a slow simmered beef tenderloin cooked with Negro Modello beer and fresh glazed onions, garlic, and Jalapeños.
Vegetarians take note, they've got you covered too. They don't use lard in their tamales either.
Both these places are Texas tamales joints, meaning, as far as the "stuffing"-to-masa ratio goes, there's more "stuffing" and a thinner masa shell than you get on a street corner in Mexico. Also, these are steamed in corn husks, not banana leaves. So keep that in mind.
I hope everyone (minus the haters, who are simply disgraceful) enjoys a tamale at least once this holiday season. I traditionally have mine as soon as my friends and I roll out of bed, hungover from New Year's Eve, usually with no sauce, just a little side of pico de gallo, and maybe a dab of sour cream on some shredded green stuff, along with Barbacoa tacos and Big Red soda.
Merry Christmas, tamales lovers (and haters too!)
MustacheBandit_
Member
^brutha likes tamales
Pristine_Condition
Member
KingOfKong said:
:lol
Damn skippy.
IronFistedChampion
Member
Bought some Peruvian tamales today and just ate them with the fam. SO. GOOD. 
clearacell
Member
Christmas cooking at my house....ah, the perks of living in a latino household...new years tradition is menudo
MustacheBandit_
Member
Ok, so I go over to my grandmas house for Christmas Eve dinner and guess what she is having? Tamales. Just my luck. I showed her this thread and she started cracking up hahaha
MustacheBandit_
Member
Absolutely. My grandparents are pretty awesome.Xeke said:
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