V: "who is your ninja friend"
E: "Castiel is my friend."
V: "do you have a girlfriend"
E: "Not yet. What is your pirate friend's name?"
V: "I don't have a ninja friend I am a man I have a girlfriend though"
E: "You just said you have a boyfriend"
V: "No I don't have a ninja friend do you want to be my boyfriend"
E: "Well, I would have to be your pirate friend."
V: "I don't want you to be my friend."
E: "I'll be your friend."
V: "okay"
E: "What do you want for Christmas?"
V: "my ninja friend back"
I'm dying here.