• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

What 5 films would you show alien invaders?

Status
Not open for further replies.
Black Mamba said:
OPDP2.jpg


Who would destroy us after this?
Click to expand...

I would.
 
So aliens travel across the vast distances of empty space to find out what films I like? I would just tell them to wipe us all out because films are only made as distractions for humans and their nature is totally different.
 
^Exactly. In fact the most entertaining to them might be children's animation, nice and simple bright colors and patterns.

Sadsic said:
Citizen Kane
Laurence of Arabia
The Wizard of Oz
2001: A Space Odyssey
White Chicks
Click to expand...
"We were very close to allowing your species to live. But now you must die."
 
McNei1y said:
How would these aliens understand our jokes?
Click to expand...

They would view all of our culture from high to low with the same attitude that we have for cockroaches and giant centipedes.

Charles Foster Kane said:
You must hand back your movie goer card. Should be banned from watching movies! Horrible human being! :P
Click to expand...

OK, I would show them five random crappy disney cartoons because if you don't like that trash then you don't have a heart, amirite?
 
- Modern Times Forever
- Cinématon
- Beijing 2003
- Untitled #125 (Hickory)
- Matrjoschka

Those 5 movies have a combined running time of 32 DAYS.
More than enough time to come up with a plan while they're distracted.
During the last five minutes of Matrjoschka there's suddenly a cut to the "Good Morning Speech" from Indepence Day and then BAM! Surprise counter attack.
 
More Fun To Compute said:
OK, I would show them five random crappy disney cartoons because if you don't like that trash then you don't have a heart, amirite?
Click to expand...

You totally missed the point dude. And no.

There could be a whole discussion on existentialism and the importance or relevance films could have, but we'll probably end up disagreeing and our opinions would remain the same.

I think pretty much everything in life could be viewed as a distraction and that film has been a great tool to showcase the nature of humans.
 
Charles Foster Kane said:
You totally missed the point dude. And no.

There could be a whole discussion on existentialism and the importance or relevance films could have, but we'll probably end up disagreeing and our opinions would remain the same.

I think pretty much everything in life could be viewed as a distraction and that film has been a great tool to showcase the nature of humans.
Click to expand...

Movies can condition human experience in certain ways but they are made to fit humans in the way that a womans coat is made to fit a woman. Asking what films you would choose to represent humans to aliens is like asking what fashionable womans coat you would choose to dress a woolly mammoth in. And then you get different women with different body sizes arguing what coat fits them best or makes them look good. In effect we would have to give them human to experiment on to show them the movies as the movies would be a small part of the puzzle.
 
Independence day
War of the worlds
Battle: los angeles

And then after they realize they won't win

Close encounters and ET to give them some hope for frindship. We can all get along
 
Skyline. Show them it'll be like Bodysnatchers, but in reverse.

Assuming nobody here saw Skyline, but it was awesome.
 
A night with a few Michael Bay and M. Night Shyamalan movies would demonstrate there's no intelligent life on Earth.
 
you GAF motherfuckers are going to get us all killed. Some of these lists read like you just want to show the alien monsters your favorite movies. And make them popcorn.

wearegoingtodie.gif
 
Planet earth w/ David Attenborough
Planet earth w/ Sigourney Weaver

Life w/ Oprah winfrey
Life w/ David Attenborough

Best worst movie
"Most people don't set out to produce a horrible film, so how exactly does it happen? This documentary about 1989's Troll 2 -- often referred to as the "worst movie in history" -- attempts to answer that question."
 
The RZA's "Man with the Iron Fists"

M Night Shyamalan's "Avatar the Last Airbender"

Dragon Ball Z the Movie

Something on BET

and of course, Catwoman
 
1. Lawrence of Arabia.
Why: One man with one idea at the right place can have one monumental impact in the arc of history. Everyone of us has this potential.

2. Saving Private Ryan
Why: Humans are capable of the most horrific brutalities, yet are also capable of unspeakable courage, camaraderie and bravery to fight and defeat those brutalities. See both the sides, and judge yourself if humans are worth saving. I guarantee you that you will.

3. Cast Away
Why: What we are like when we are isolated, and how we long for social contact and human relationships. The idea is to show that we are social beings that live together and do things together.

4. The Counterfeiters
Why: How fucking ingenious and awesomely brave we are in the face of confinement, degradation and a long and torturous but sure death at the hands of evil. We may hate each other and sometimes do stupid things, but one thing you will learn about us is that good always triumphs in the end.

5. The Unforgiven
Why: Not sure. But I wanted it to be on this list. It has no clear good characters and bad characters. There is rape, violence and murder by the dozen. There is not even a grey area. The last 1/3rd of the movie is balls to the walls off-the-rails crazy. But they should still watch it because sometimes you can't explain why something is good.
 
Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire
Hotel Rwanda
Spirited Away
Toy Story 1-3
Eden Lake

Yeah, that's more than five. So fucking what.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

If you could go on any game show, what would it be?
33
515
Grenseal replied
What would you do if you got this email?
Opinion  2
91
780
Peggies replied
Would you consider this
24
546
ReasonBeing replied
Alien 5 (Sigourney Weaver) TBA
2
87
2K
JPSLotus97T replied
  • Poll
What Generation Are You?
2 3
124
1K
ValiantInstance replied
Top Bottom