Is it bad that laughed at this?I once had a crush on a girl that worked concessions at a garbage wrestling show in Memphis. She liked me but a chain match featuring One Man Gang and a midget changed her mind. She picked the midget, and all I got was a lousy t-shirt that said "don't be jealous".
When I was 15 I had a wank in maths class.
we will feast, have faith.Thirsty as heck for a new Brand New album.
Neither have I truthfully. Until now. Things change, crazy shit happens to you and you get a new perspective on life.
I used to be all about meeting my soul mate and spending the rest of our lives together. Well I did, married her, but a brain tumour changed her personality so we had to split. So I kinda feel like I've been there and done that. Now its time to have some fun.
.Why tho
I guess this is my answer.Thirsty as heck for a new Brand New album.
No no, you gotta post the real answer.
I guess this is my answer.
Since I'm not sure I wanna post my real answers.
My high school girlfriend was rather conservative about anything sexual at first. We were 16 and she wouldn't even show me her tits until we had dated for 3 months. Together we came up with this kind of schedule (I chalk this up to being a dumb teen) -- I'd see her tits at 3 months of dating, downstairs at 6 months and then we'd have sex after a year of dating. Obviously this left me with an insatiable thirst. I would have frozen myself like Walt Disney just to get to the one year mark.
Flash forward a few months (I had already seen the goods after month 3), and we both decide it's time to go at it for the first time finally feeling ready (probably only around 6 months or so into our relationship). We're in her bedroom in her parents house, nobody else home. We start going at it, me wearing a condom like a responsible adult, and we hear a voice downstairs.
Her parents never locked their front door, so my girlfriend's best friend and her boyfriend (who was also my childhood friend and neighbor) walk in and call up to us. I'm buck ass naked on the floor of her bedroom balls deep in my girlfriend for the first time when we hear them coming up the steps. We throw on clothes faster than I've ever seen anyone dress. I don't even have time to take off the condom, so it's still wrapped around my member as I pull on my jeans.
We get fully dressed and they walk in (this is a common thing -- she lives next door). We can't find a way to get them to leave. We end up hanging out with with them for a full hour while I maintain a half-virgin half-chub.
During this time the thirst was unbearable. Finally they decided to leave (I don't even remember to do what) and we were able to get back to business. The only thing than no sex at all is interrupted virgin sex.
right after the divorce I dated this christian marathon runner
she informed me that she was not going to have sex until she got married. this didn't stop naked heavy petting
I had the bluest balls in all the land
11th grade, cute girl shows interest in me, spends time cuddling me Everytime I see her. Start hanging out with her during summer, everyday for like two weeks. She's expressed explicit interest in me at this point even bursting out saying she'd wanna go out with me. So for the next two weeks we meet up, hang out for two hours a day, sometimes go back to my place and man I just really wanted to fuck, but there was this one dude who would follow us around Everytime we hung out, I didn't and still don't like him. So eventually we all end up back at my house playing DmC and this girl is sitting on my lap, I'm playing with her boobs, I got an erection and made the mistake of saying "sorry about my boner" out loud and made things really fuckin awkward for the three of us. The rest of that day wasn't too pleasant. A couple days later she came back though and it was just us, I apologized about the boner thing and we layed in bed for an hour listening to Beck but she fell asleep on me within 15 minutes for like an hour and a half. It's been little over a year since then and I'm still kinda embarrassed. Had I had Netflix back then I feel like this story would've had a different outcome.No no, you gotta post the real answer
Yu aren't worthy of the thrist or you would have gotten the tag in that threadWhen I wanted TLOP to drop
Yu aren't worthy of the thrist or you would have gotten the tag in that thread
FZZ
Official L taker.
(Today, 04:43 PM)
How did i miss this glorious post. This should be ur tag.I haven't had sex in like 6 years and I'm still thirstier for Half-Life 3.
Nigga what
The fucking struggle. I asked this group of girls if i could use a spot next to them at the gym, and the less attractive one goes "you can do whatever you want haha!" While eye fucking me.All the time. I'm attracted to girls that don't want me, and repulsed by girls that are into me. Guess my brain likes an impossible challenge.
My first girlfriend. I was a dumb horny christian boy back then who desperately wanted to fuck anything due to a mixture of that stupid abstinence movement that was going on in my religion at the time and overprotective parents.
Thirsty as heck for a new Brand New album.
LMAO. This went places in a more descript way than I had imagined. I don't even know if I'm making sense, I'm laughing too hard with my sleeping child on me.Eh, if I hang on another couple of years I can just get a VR helmet and a vacuum hosed onto my genitals. Real people are too loud and smelly anyway.
right after the divorce I dated this christian marathon runner
she informed me that she was not going to have sex until she got married. this didn't stop naked heavy petting
I had the bluest balls in all the land
No. I didn't realize how embarrassing it was until I told my friends when I went back to college the next semester.Is it bad that laughed at this?
lmaoooo
in high school I was fat. Like 250lbs fat. I jerked off religiously, scabbed hands & all.
edit: since we're doing embarrassing thirst stories. I was so thirsty one day i took my big ass to the fridge and tried fucking a jar of mayo. shit was cold.
give up right?
nah.
microwaves that shit.
evidently I microwaved it for too long.
still have a scar on my dick.
then I found out about the gym, lost 70lbs, I no longer thirst.
edit: I hope my IT guy doesn't read this
I wanted a N64 more than Hillary Clinton wants to be president, i also ran a more extensive campaign to get it.
lmaoooo
in high school I was fat. Like 250lbs fat. I jerked off religiously, scabbed hands & all.
edit: since we're doing embarrassing thirst stories. I was so thirsty one day i took my big ass to the fridge and tried fucking a jar of mayo. shit was cold.
give up right?
nah.
microwaves that shit.
evidently I microwaved it for too long.
still have a scar on my dick.
then I found out about the gym, lost 70lbs, I no longer thirst.
edit: I hope my IT guy doesn't read this
No man, just no.lmaoooo
in high school I was fat. Like 250lbs fat. I jerked off religiously, scabbed hands & all.
edit: since we're doing embarrassing thirst stories. I was so thirsty one day i took my big ass to the fridge and tried fucking a jar of mayo. shit was cold.
give up right?
nah.
microwaves that shit.
evidently I microwaved it for too long.
still have a scar on my dick.
then I found out about the gym, lost 70lbs, I no longer thirst.
edit: I hope my IT guy doesn't read this
Thirsty AF for my degree, one more year. But I gotta do an Honours project too.
Who even has time for sex anymore?Besides Years 1-3
give up right?
nah.
microwaves that shit.
lmaoooo
in high school I was fat. Like 250lbs fat. I jerked off religiously, scabbed hands & all.
edit: since we're doing embarrassing thirst stories. I was so thirsty one day i took my big ass to the fridge and tried fucking a jar of mayo. shit was cold.
give up right?
nah.
microwaves that shit.
evidently I microwaved it for too long.
still have a scar on my dick.
then I found out about the gym, lost 70lbs, I no longer thirst.
edit: I hope my IT guy doesn't read this
lmaoooo
in high school I was fat. Like 250lbs fat. I jerked off religiously, scabbed hands & all.
edit: since we're doing embarrassing thirst stories. I was so thirsty one day i took my big ass to the fridge and tried fucking a jar of mayo. shit was cold.
give up right?
nah.
microwaves that shit.
evidently I microwaved it for too long.
still have a scar on my dick.
then I found out about the gym, lost 70lbs, I no longer thirst.
edit: I hope my IT guy doesn't read this
right after the divorce I dated this christian marathon runner
she informed me that she was not going to have sex until she got married. this didn't stop naked heavy petting
I had the bluest balls in all the land
I don't know how to get laid so...
Right now? I'm pretty fucking desperate tbh.
Thinking about trying dudes since apparently women are allergic to me or something.![]()