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Why the hell do Hot Pockets have baking instructions?

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Put 1-2 paper towels on the plate. Eat the Pizza Pocket using the paper towel as a sleeve. You avoid the mess and the pizza pocket is not slimy from condensation.

And you end up eating most of the paper towel as well. At least I do. Not gonna waste that cheese/sauce now are we. Yummy and full of the fiber that's lacking in the actual pocket.
 
Hot Pockets taste way better when baked. Crispy crust and the melding of the flavors in the cheese-like goop and meat-like goop make it worth it. Hell, I eat my Hot Pockets with a knife and fork when I cook them in the oven because they're good enough to savor in small slices instead of inhaling in three seconds
but mostly because they're molten hot as fuck
. If I must have something RIGHT THIS INSTANT I go for something that requires zero preparation at all, like a Lunchable.
 
It's because they are vastly superior baked. Hot pockets are NOT one of those foods that are designed only, and only to be microwaved like TV dinners.

If I want something so easy that it doesn't require proper cooking, then I'll eat a bag of chips or something. Otherwise, I cook my Hot Pockets correctly.
 
You must have a weak gut. I've never experienced this.

Then again, a large portion of gaf also spray shit out of their asses if they are in the vicinity of a Taco Bell so maybe I'm one of the weird ones.

Very possible. They taste so delicious, but wow, they get to me every single time.
 
my mom always baked the marie calendars chicken pot pies...i never understood that. i want my pie NOW

The one time I microwaved a pot pie it came out disgusting. The crust had this weird dry and tough consistency and stuck to the pan. I places pot pies higher on the deliciousness/worth it scale, so they get the oven while Hot Pockets get their asses in the microwave.
 
Duh!

You gotta deep fry that shit, mmm mmmmm.

On a related pocket-esque food note, a friend of mine introduced me to the technique of cooking jamaican meat patties on a Foreman grill, I can never cook them any other way now.

Total game changer.
 
Foods like Chicken Pot Pies actually existed before microwave ovens. Pot Pies used to actually come in a tin bowl instead of that paper one and was meant for oven cooking. It wasn't until microwaves became wildly popular that they changed how they came and added microwave instructions.
 
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