No disrespect (do you like that?) but that totally reads like Republican double speak and / or with several dog whistles blowing. Also interesting how it's 'forcing' people. Like trans women are the mean, bigoted, aggressors.
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Would you ever date a transgender person?
- Thread starter Endo Punk
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No disrespect (do you like that?) but that totally reads like Republican double speak and / or with several dog whistles blowing. Also interesting how it's 'forcing' people. Like trans women are the mean, bigoted, aggressors.
SuperAngelo64
Banned
I like how this turned from a genuine question to a cesspool of oversensitivity and bullshit semantics.
Jesus Christ, never again OT.
Too predictable.
Jesus Christ, never again OT.
Too predictable.
1. Why would you call a cisgendered woman "she" and not a trans woman? What exactly is the difference from your perspective?
2. What negative impact does calling a trans woman "she" have in your life?
Do you have an argument against anything said in the thread? If so, present it. If not, what is the point of your post other than to let people know that your view (whatever that is) is superior to theirs? That's not constructive, not conducive to conversation, and no better than what you are accusing other people in the thread of doing.
What a heavily weighted and highly convoluted question to pose. If it were merely a question of attraction, the answer would be of course, but considering how vague of a term "transgender person" is it's really hard to give a straightforward answer. Also having to look at diagrams just to be utmost sure you're not going to offend anyone is a bit scary. Race even seems like a safer topic. The accepted terms for each have less variables. If you're from Africa, Jamaica, or even Haiti in some cases you're considered black, and only Haitians would really take offense to that. "White" is an even larger blanket term, and yet for the most part it's the accepted vernacular. Anyway, if I'm honest with myself I don't think I could date a transgendered person that wasn't post-op, and that even then I might subconsciously hold this person to a rigid standard of antiquated societal norms of how they should behave and whether or not they fit the prototypical stereotypes of how a woman should behave. Also the vagina would have to be perfect. Contrarily, I might feel more pressured myself to adhere to gender stereotypes in order to shield myself from having my sexuality questioned, given the already massive amount of accusations I receive. I'm not sure I could knowingly handle it. I admit to being a bit prejudiced, but call me a bigot and I will maim you verbally before being banned.
Johnny Cage In The Shower
Member
nvrmind
Vermillion
Banned
Hmm. Maybe not.
Uncle0wnage
Member
I'm just saying how I see her on the basis of sex, I don't insist on others seeing her as male, it's just how my mind would process everything. I'm glad she sees herself as a woman and that others do too, I can't choose the way my mind identifys her anymore than she can. Our bodies are just transportation for the minds within. I just wouldn't be able to date a trans woman.
Err wait, i'm confused. Are you saying you'd call a trans woman "she", but in your head you'd think of her as a man?
Uncle0wnage
Member
Trans women can't make people indentify them as female in the same way that people can't make trans women indentify as male. Everyone has a different perception of reality, to act like anyone's is superior and more right and that everyone must share that exact view is bigoted in itself.
Princess Viola
Member
ignore
ZombieSupaStar
Member
No I wouldn't.
Uncle0wnage
Member
I'd call her she, her, etc. I guess in my mind I'd see her as a woman trapped in a man's body that has been altered to make her more comfortable in this existence. She is a woman. Her body just wouldn't be completely female.
Devolution
Member
No. They are women. Attraction is one thing and you already have those preferences among cis women. People do not have to respect the inconsistent logic that pervades when it comes to these discussions involving trans identities. You can't just wash away ignorance and bigotry with "but everyone is a snowflake with unique perceptions of life."
Uncle0wnage
Member
Sorry, it was poor wording, I mean that it doesn't matter what someone's biological sex is if it isn't about sexual relationships. We both identify her as a woman, but we differ on the exact sex of her body. Which doesn't matter in anything but sexual relationships to me.
See this is really messy. I would identify a transgendered person as they want to be identified, and even recognize this gender in all facets. However, I would not consider having sex with a pre-op transgendered person given that they have penises. She might be beautiful and she might be a good friend, but I don't like penises. Some people take that as you're associating penises with males and that's why you're not interested. And I don't think that's true. Even with a post-transgendered person I might be weary of going down and being thrown off if every bell and whistle isn't quite the same. I haven't had sex a lot, but I've given a lot of face and therefore I do have a strong pre-conception of what a vagina should look like.
Why does this matter in sexual relationships?
Have you asked her yet?
charlequin
Banned
Why does it matter there? I think that's a lot of what this gets down to here, and why the argument that it's some kind of "sexual preference" seems so bizarre. What exactly constitutes being a "straight" man is certainly complicated and nuanced, but on a certain level wanting to put your penis in the vagina of someone with a womanly figure is a pretty core part of it. What is it about someone's history of having a different body that makes their body unsuitable for that kind of attraction?
(And for that matter, what makes, say, someone who was intersex and assigned to female as a baby, or suffers from CAIS, different here?)
While different people certainly differ greatly on their own personal feelings on the matter, I definitely don't think there's anything wrong with not wanting to have sex with someone because of the specific genitals they currently have.
Uncle0wnage
Member
Because it does for me? Because it's my inate preference? Because I want biological children with a wife/girlfriend someday?
Johnny Cage In The Shower
Member
Don't be like that! you're making me upset, if mods went around and started banning people in these threads on trivial things, these threads will never pick up pace and will just be "dangerous ground" to step in.
I for one am finding a bit refreshing to walk into a so called "controversial" threads and not see the first page full of...grandpasimpson.gifs or "Oh this will go well".."I'm not falling for this trap" etc. etc.
Those comments prove nothing but people are just too afraid to start discussion and learn something new on GAF.
I cannot even believe I wrote all this.
I should've just told you to go back and pay attention to your date instead of worrying about randoms being banned on the Goddamn internet!! This is your fuckin date we are taking about! a human being in your physical presence who requires your full attention... You should care about her more than you should care about someone, somewhere having misguided opinions about homosexuality, FFS commedieu, don't make me like you less!
charlequin
Banned
Well, that's not actually true, so strike that one.
So you won't date someone unless they can prove they're fertile?
For reals. Step away from the phone, brah.
Would I date a transgendered woman? I honestly couldn't say. Thinking about it, I don't really see why I wouldn't, but the opportunity has never presented itself, and I have never given it any serious thought. I am admittedly rather uneducated on transgendered individuals.
I'd have to meet such a woman, get to know and learn from her about transgendered people.
Maybe test out the equipment. It's all a matter of education, after all. Hands-on is the best way to learn. :}
I'd have to meet such a woman, get to know and learn from her about transgendered people.
Maybe test out the equipment. It's all a matter of education, after all. Hands-on is the best way to learn. :}
The Return of
Banned
I don't believe that I could date a transgender female knowing she was born a male. I've seen pretty transgender females though.
Uncle0wnage
Member
I date with the expectation that said relationship could at some point evolve into a long term relationship with children. That is usually a very small expectation that grows larger the longer the relationship lasts. I didn't choose to find females attractive, in the same vein I also didn't choose to find males, whatever their gender, that alter their bodies unattractive.
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
I don't think I could either. I don't have anything against transgendered people, but that fact would constantly nag at me at the back of my head, like an itch that won't go away. It wouldn't really be fair to her. Just being honest.
charlequin
Banned
So you would unceremoniously dump someone if she revealed to you that she was infertile.
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
I wouldn't, like I said my only concern would be the goods.
Dice
Pokémon Parentage Conspiracy Theorist
I date with the dread that it could turn into a relationship with children. If I get the money together there may well be a post-op (vasectomy) me.
The realization that many women want children is an interesting thing to think about. When would I choose to divulge this information about myself? I feel like it could be similar to being transgendered in some ways.
The realization that many women want children is an interesting thing to think about. When would I choose to divulge this information about myself? I feel like it could be similar to being transgendered in some ways.
Kayo is such a QT
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
My version of S&M fantasy is Kayo beating my ass with C.Viper while I use Dhalsim and can't counterpick.
Uncle0wnage
Member
It really depends on how far the relationship has progressed, I may change my mind on children before I reach that hypothetical point. This still doesn't change the fact that I don't find trans people sexually attractive.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
The Return of
Banned
Yup, makes it sound a bit shallow but just the way it is. I know for sure it'd bother me in the back of my head even if I were happy spending times with her.
Alright, so I did a Google image search and found out that the individual pictured above goes by the name "Lea T."Nothing about this looks masculine:
I don't even have a positive opinion of TG individuals.
Found images from different angles, and it's clear that the above is not an accurate depiction:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/06/02/lea-t-swimsuit-bikini_n_870210.html#s286155
Much more masculine in that gallery. Now I'm skeptical of all of them.
It's great that some people here are so open minded, but I don't think it makes me or anyone else a bad person (or a bigot) if they don't want to do it with someone who currently or previously had the genitals/body of a male (or female, whatevs). It doesn't seem fair to have to so staunchly defend the position that "It would be weird to do it with a person who used to be a dude, I don't think I could do it/want to do it". It seems like that's what most threads like these end up being.
Trent Strong
Banned
Some people want biological children. I guess that makes them evil.
Uncle0wnage
Member
Seriously, this. The concept is just so alien to me, and it's even stranger that I'm getting shamed for my beliefs that aren't hurting anyone. I'd understand if someone got shamed for wanting gender reassignment surgery to be illegal, but I don't get why people get shamed for having opinions that don't effect anyone but themselves.
Uncle0wnage
Member
I'm super evil then.
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
This topic makes me remember an article I read in Reader's Digest a few weeks ago. There was this married couple who had been married for something like 20 years and had two kids in their teens. The wife discovered the husband one day trying on her clothes and lingerie and he came out to her that he (forgive me if my terminology is wrong) felt like a woman/was a woman in his (her?) mind and that now the secret was out in the open. So for a while, I guess they experimented with this, but the time eventually came when the husband wanted to go full-out and get surgery or the operation or whatever it was to complete the transformation. Afterwards, the wife was unable to cope and couldn't find herself attracted to him (her?) anymore and the marriage fell apart, even though they were still in love with each other, or at least the husband was still in love with the wife. Don't remember if she was still in love with the husband.
That story made me pretty sad
That story made me pretty sad
charlequin
Banned
Because... you can sense with your third eye what manner of genitals they used to have? I guess? And therefore know in advance not to be attracted?
People who feel this way rarely feel the need to make sweeping pronouncements about how they would never date the infertile, though (and generally find that they have other options in their life if the person they love -- or they themselves -- turn out to be incapable of having biological children.)
Princess Viola
Member
Well children are the spawn of demons.
GillianSeed79
Member
Okay, I'm going to approach this cautiously as a straight person myself. If they were pre-op and had a penis, you'd still get to have anal sex with them - which I hear is a very popular male fantasy and the subject of many pornographic videos - 100 percent of the time. So the smoking hot woman has a penis. It's just a penis I guess. That is probably a big thing to get over though.
As far as the vagina thing, yeah, I still don't know how they work. In all honesty I'd be less intimadated by a chick packing a wang. I know how those work.
Encountering a vagina for me is like playing Myst. It's interesting for the first 30 minutes until I realize I have no idea what I'm doing and have to read a faq to unlock the orgasm puzzle so I can go to bed.
This topic makes me remember an article I read in Reader's Digest a few weeks ago. There was this married couple who had been married for something like 20 years and had two kids in their teens. The wife discovered the husband one day trying on her clothes and lingerie and he came out to her that he (forgive me if my terminology is wrong) felt like a woman/was a woman in his (her?) mind and that now the secret was out in the open. So for a while, I guess they experimented with this, but the time eventually came when the husband wanted to go full-out and get surgery or the operation or whatever it was to complete the transformation. Afterwards, the wife was unable to cope and couldn't find herself attracted to him (her?) anymore and the marriage fell apart, even though they were still in love with each other, or at least the husband was still in love with the wife. Don't remember if she was still in love with the husband.
That story made me pretty sad
Sad for everybody involved. That would especially suck being lied to for 20+ years.
>Woman's marriage falls apart because her wife can't accept her for who she is
GEE MUST BE SO BAD FOR THE CIS WOMAN IN THE RELATIONSHIP
charlequin
Banned
Most of what we are trying to establish here is how "I'm uncomfortable dating a trans person," "I'm not attracted to trans people," and "I would not date a trans person because they're the wrong gender" are all very different positions to hold.
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