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You see a man/woman/child crying in the parking lot, do you ask them if they're ok?

A child, sure I probably would. An adult? No. You don't know why someone is crying. They're in a bad mood already and you don't know they'll confide in you, a random stranger, or tell you it's none of your business.
 

Tyaren

Member
If it's a young child alone, I definitely would. I'd think it might be lost. Regarding a grown man or woman it would depend on the circumstances and what the crying person looks like. If it's some dodgy looking character I'd make a big circle around him/her.

I have approached people before (not in the parking lot), who seemed to be distressed. So far I think it was always the right choice to offer help.
 
980Jqz.gif

Being completely honest, this would be me
 

_Ryo_

Member
As a non white LGBT person, Id like to help and in the moment I might but I presently feel the need to be very cautious, so it is highly unlikely. I have in the past though.
 

Yoshi

Headmaster of Console Warrior Jugendstrafanstalt
- If I know the person (no matter if I like the person very much or not): Ask whether I can help / what is wrong.
- If I do not know the person, it is a child and the child is alone: Ask whether I can help / what is wrong / where the parents are
- Otherwise: Usually do not interfere, most people do not seem to want this. If I get the impression the person in question does want help from a stranger, independent of age / sex: Ask whether I can help.
 

undrtakr900

Member
This was the first thing I thought of, the full video is even better:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=daJZU5plRhs
=======


I had a similar, yet much more serious, situation at the train-station. I was alone on the elevator when an 18-20 yearOld white woman got on, whose face was beaten, bruised with black eyes. She briefly gave me this heartbreaking glance as to say "Please Help!" Every ounce of me wanted to help in anyway possible, but I immediately hesitated, because I knew how a "black man with a beaten white woman" would look like, so I said/did nothing. =(

After we got to the stop, I waited a good 15-20 seconds before I walked, so people wouldn't think I was the one who attacked her. Writing this makes me sound horrible, but these are the type of things that runs through a black person's mind.
 
If I see a kid, alone, crying - why would I not? The kid might have gotten separated from the parents.

A grown man/woman? I'd rely on my gut feeling there.
 

Javaman

Member
That's how I met my first GF. Saw her crying in a parking lot behind an arcade and asked her if she was ok. Turned out she and her bf broke up. we dated for a year or two then I figured out how batshit insane she was. Faking being pregnant to keep us together, lying about her previous bf beating her. She ended up cheating on me a couple months later(I saw some hickies) and I bailed the heck out. Moral to the story is I should have let her cry.
 

Grisby

Member
Depends on how hard it is. If they're a complete wreck than yes, I think i would. If it was just a few tears than I would probably give them their space. Each situation, like the individual, is different right?
 
Nope, it's none of my business.
Exactly. If you butt into someone's life, there's a good chance you are going to catch some hands, or worse. There are a huge amount of emotionally unstable people with mental issues and they could be set off by the smallest thing. You have no idea who you are dealing with.
Might as well answer honestly

An attractive woman? Absolutely

A man? Nah

A child? Oh hell nah
agree-nod.gif
 

Media

Member
Yes I would and have done so in the past. Twice with lost kids at big stores and twice with adults. One was a depressed homeless man, and the other was a woman who just learned her sister had been killed by her husband.

There wasn't much I could do for the homeless man, he wasn't all there mentally and calling authority would just landed him in jail, but I hugged the woman for a long time until her own husband arrived. She was crying so hard she couldn't even stand. I hope she's doing alright.
 

ZOONAMI

Junior Member
Obviously yes if it's a kid who looks young enough to need a parent and no one is around. Adult nah unless they are obviously physically injured. Otherwise I figure it's personal and leave it be.
 

KHarvey16

Member
A child that's alone and looks lost, sure. Anything else would be a no.

I think this might be a "do you live in a city or not?" type question.
 
I honestly don't know, never been in the situation, i would want to, but i wouldn't know what to say or how to help them! I'm shit to find the right words, i could worsen the situation!

If it's a kid, i would ask

This was the first thing I thought of, the full video is even better:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=daJZU5plRhs
=======

didn't know this show, is it good? This part is funny, but is it during the whole thing?
 

Eggbok

Member
Reminds me of those random events in GTAV. People by themselves crying saying they need help but then their friends come out of no where and try to rob/kill you. Part of me would want to help but I would be very skeptical about it.
 

Dali

Member
This was the first thing I thought of, the full video is even better:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=daJZU5plRhs
=======


I had a similar, yet much more serious, situation at the train-station. I was alone on the elevator when an 18-20 yearOld white woman got on, whose face was beaten, bruised with black eyes. She briefly gave me this heartbreaking glance as to say "Please Help!" Every ounce of me wanted to help in anyway possible, but I immediately hesitated, because I knew how a "black man with a beaten white woman" would look like, so I said/did nothing. =(

After we got to the stop, I waited a good 15-20 seconds before I walked, so people wouldn't think I was the one who attacked her. Writing this makes me sound horrible, but these are the type of things that runs through a black person's mind.
Oh geez reading that after watching that blackish clip again made me laugh as I imagined you recounting the story like the young dude in the video. "Saw my freedom flash before my eyes."
 
Fuck no. Not my business nor my problem. I have enough to worry about in my own life. If they are obviously hurt/injured that is a different story.
 
No. Unless someone was bleeding pretty hard or a bone was obviously broken, I'm just gonna waltz on by.

Because

1) I'm a grown man and going anywhere near a child is gonna raise alarm bells.
2) Person's crying ain't none of my business.
3) I don't want people coming up and asking me shit, so I operate on that with other people.
4) It's America. I might get shot or something. WI is a crazy place if you aren't in like Madison.
 
Child, yes. Adult, no. Unless they were just hysterical, which I actually did one time. But it wasn't worth it.

EDIT: regarding the child thing, I'll just take my chances man. I can't let a child sit there crying alone. I'll take my chances.
 

Fbh

Member
To be honest.... no I wouldn't unless I clearly see the person is injured or in some sort of obvious danger.

Specially not a child. Sadly, with the way our society is today, as a man you can't even get 10 feet close to a unsupervised child without being called a kidnaper or pedophile.
 
I would probably stay and bit (maybe a minute and observe from a far.

A little less for a man than a woman because I would be afraid he would notice and may come over to start something physically.

A child who is crying alone I would observe until an adult came to them.
 
Yeah. Most of y'all need to stop being that awkward person who stares at a person in distress and walks away with their hands in their pockets.

Just be a good person and help another out.
 
A child that's alone and looks lost, sure. Anything else would be a no.

I think this might be a "do you live in a city or not?" type question.

Spent the first 13 years of my life living in what some people think is one of the most dangerous areas in the country (West Side of Chicago). My incident happened downstate. I mean, if it's the middle of the night on the west side and the area's not well lit, then yeah, maybe I hesitate and try to see if I can see anything suspicious (like a car nearby idling or good hiding spots or something), but if I can be reasonably assured of my safety, then I'd still do it.
 

Phu

Banned
This is one of those 'don't know what I'll do til it happens' sort of thing.

Last time I helped a stranger with more than a minor-minor thing was last summer. A little girl had accidentally overfilled her Slurpee and it was getting all over. I just went 'want help?', she nervously nodded and handed me it and I started wiping it off with a bunch of napkins. Her dad/guardian eventually came and said thanks and I handed it off to him.

Still, while it was happening I couldn't help but think, 'man, I hope nobody thinks I'm over her fucking with her drink or something.'
 
A child? Absolutely

A Woman? Most likely

A man? That's where things get difficult. I struggle with social anxiety so interacting with any stranger can cause me to get anxious however most of the men in my life haven't exactly been kind to me. My Father left when I was very young, came back when I was about 11ish saying he wanted to get back into my life only to end up stealing pretty much every non clothes item I owned shortly after and I've never seen him since. My mothers now ex (not my father) moved in and lived with us when I was 5 until shortly after I moved out a few years ago and made my childhood pretty hell. He was a huge alcoholic and was a VERY verbally abusive drunk and because my mother was stuck needing to work to afford bills and couldn't kick him out over 4 nights every week I was scared being in my own house, crying myself to sleep many times and holding my bladder because I was too afraid to leave my room to go to the bathroom. Lastly I've been used for money and other things by some guy friends in the past so my experience with men I've known in person hasn't been very good to say the least and as a result I'm kind of afraid of men in general =/
 

riotous

Banned
Depends on the situation; just a random person crying without any obvious reason why? Probably wouldn't; only because I'd probably want to be left alone in that situation.

If it's fairly clear the person is in distress because they need help with something? Yeah, I often help people. Have paid for a mother's groceries, helped a woman whose car had run out of gas, changed random people's tires, etc.
 

Suntory

Neo Member
That would depend I guess. A child, I would instantly help because maybe he or she is lost or whatever.

For an adult I would be more reluctant because I don't know what happened and don't want to interfere in other peoples' business if I don't know the situation. If he or she looks in trouble and shows any signs that he / she needs someone to listen to them, sure I'll go up to them. If not, I'll probably leave them be. Not everyone that is crying wants to someone by there side.

For me crying is a very personal thing, so if I was crying in a parking lot (small chance), I'd probably want to be left alone. Therefore I'd do the same to others if it's not clear that person wanted me to there.
 

Van Bur3n

Member
Surprised so many will approach a child. That's just asking for some wacky parent to catch you with them, attack you, end up getting arrested, and then you'll have to leave town.
 

Media

Member
Surprised so many will approach a child. That's just asking for some wacky parent to catch you with them, attack you, end up getting arrested, and then you'll have to leave town.

I'm a woman, so that's not an issue for me. I hate that it is for men, that shit is so stupid. I've been random handed babies in public from strangers if I commented on how cute they were
 

DMONKUMA

Junior Member
Honestly because of a certain incident that happen to me I would be very apprehensive and probably wouldn't do anything. If they appear injured then maybe.

I would call the cops though, especially if it's a child.
 

Luminaire

Member
If it was a child, I'd call a sheriff. Last thing I'd want is some beligerent and emotionally compromised parent thinking I'm trying to steal their kid.

A man or woman? Likely wouldn't bother. I wouldn't trust an emotional stranger. I wouldn't expect a stranger to trust me or help me either.
 
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