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NCIS writers trying to make gamers heads explode through dialogue

C

chickdigger802

Banned
Marleyman said:
These CBS crime shows were, I thought, only watched by senior citizens and human beings without a shred of knowledge about the real world. Every one of them is ridiculously over the top and there are always dead bodies around.
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idk. I always enjoyed this stuff. It's like light heart comedy. After busy day at work/school, maybe you dont wanna watch some stressful show like 'breaking bad'.
 
T

The Technomancer

card-carrying scientician
chickdigger802 said:
Here's something fun. How much better can y'all do?

Criteria:
- Establish other person is very good at some (made up) online video game.
- Your character is above average nerd.
- Make it all understandable to the 'average joe' audience, yet still sound absurd enough because it's video games on tv.

Let's see some gaf screenwriting skillz!
Click to expand...
*Character A walks in on Character B playing*

A:"Dude, is that 'Killzone 3'!?"
B:(not looking up) "Yeah, shhh, I'm in the middle of an Assassination round"
A:"Oh hey! Grab the jetpack!"
B:"Yeah, take that suckers" *cackles*
 
A

aristotle

Member
It amazes me how many people look to entertainment as some form of intellectual textbook/guide. Unless you're watching a documentary or something that is supposed to be 100% fact, it is only there for entertainment purposes. The elitism in this thread is part of the reason so many gamers are still looked down on. It's entertainment. Shut off your brain and enjoy it or find something else that stimulates your enjoyment faculties of the brain. It's like none of you that are complaining know how to just have fun or enjoy yourself (or better yet make fun of the people who do like these shows/movies).

Do you really think there are many places on the 'net where guitarists sit around and make fun of tv shows/movies that show someone playing an chord wrong and that real chord sound comes out? It's nitpicky and really kind of petty. Just be glad that your hobby is actually getting some decent airtime, which is part of the big reason why it's becoming more mainstream. I mean really, I don't hear anyone in this thread (yet) making fun of The Last Starfighter or War Games or The Wizard or Weird Science.

As more and more of the general population gets into our lil hobby, more and more will become versed in it's phrases and actual terminology and these silly little snippets will decrease before everything becomes public knowledge. Just have fun and be entertained for the time being.
 
S

Shambles

Member
aristotle said:
It amazes me how many people look to entertainment as some form of intellectual textbook/guide. Unless you're watching a documentary or something that is supposed to be 100% fact, it is only there for entertainment purposes. The elitism in this thread is part of the reason so many gamers are still looked down on. It's entertainment. Shut off your brain and enjoy it or find something else that stimulates your enjoyment faculties of the brain. It's like none of you that are complaining know how to just have fun or enjoy yourself (or better yet make fun of the people who do like these shows/movies).

Do you really think there are many places on the 'net where guitarists sit around and make fun of tv shows/movies that show someone playing an chord wrong and that real chord sound comes out? It's nitpicky and really kind of petty. Just be glad that your hobby is actually getting some decent airtime, which is part of the big reason why it's becoming more mainstream. I mean really, I don't hear anyone in this thread (yet) making fun of The Last Starfighter or War Games or The Wizard or Weird Science.

As more and more of the general population gets into our lil hobby, more and more will become versed in it's phrases and actual terminology and these silly little snippets will decrease before everything becomes public knowledge. Just have fun and be entertained for the time being.
Click to expand...

They would if they portrayed a rockstar in NCIS that thought you play a guitar with drumsticks. If someone doesn't know what they are talking about they shouldn't be writing a show around it. It's as painful as when adults in shows try to use the lingo of 'kids these days' to try to appear hip. The audience they are targetting is the exact audience that knows they are full of shit.
 
A

aristotle

Member
Shambles said:
They would if they portrayed a rockstar in NCIS that thought you play a guitar with drumsticks. If someone doesn't know what they are talking about they shouldn't be writing a show around it. It's as painful as when adults in shows try to use the lingo of 'kids these days' to try to appear hip. The audience they are targetting is the exact audience that knows they are full of shit.
Click to expand...


I'm pretty damn sure the target audience of NCIS isn't anyone in this thread as the posts here are a straight reflection of that. The Matrix was targeted to the majority of posters in here so little bits of it they actually got right. That's the difference. And if someone doesn't know what they are talking about they shouldn't be writing about it? How do you explain all the posts in OT or especially the gaming side where people are constantly expounding who wins what sales-age thread or if Sony actually locked down the PSN for good?
 
K

Kai Dracon

Writing a dinosaur space opera symphony
aristotle said:
It amazes me how many people look to entertainment as some form of intellectual textbook/guide. Unless you're watching a documentary or something that is supposed to be 100% fact, it is only there for entertainment purposes. The elitism in this thread is part of the reason so many gamers are still looked down on. It's entertainment. Shut off your brain and enjoy it or find something else that stimulates your enjoyment faculties of the brain. It's like none of you that are complaining know how to just have fun or enjoy yourself (or better yet make fun of the people who do like these shows/movies).

Do you really think there are many places on the 'net where guitarists sit around and make fun of tv shows/movies that show someone playing an chord wrong and that real chord sound comes out? It's nitpicky and really kind of petty. Just be glad that your hobby is actually getting some decent airtime, which is part of the big reason why it's becoming more mainstream. I mean really, I don't hear anyone in this thread (yet) making fun of The Last Starfighter or War Games or The Wizard or Weird Science.

As more and more of the general population gets into our lil hobby, more and more will become versed in it's phrases and actual terminology and these silly little snippets will decrease before everything becomes public knowledge. Just have fun and be entertained for the time being.
Click to expand...

You're taking this the wrong way. People don't make fun of The Last Starfighter because it's supposed to be fantasy, and its absurdity is done affectionately. War Games, much like Tron, is from prehistoric computer times, so silly and unrealistic conventions due to sheer ignorance about computers - which were a new and obscure technology - just cause a smile rather than eye rolling.

People snerk at these contemporary shows and their absurd portrayals of technology, because a computer is now an everyday tool. The kind of mistakes and bizarre ideas popular entertainment programs display about computers is typically beyond the level of a guitar chord being played incorrectly.

It's more like a procedural crime show set in relatively the real world, showing that contemporary cars don't have steering wheels, take photographs with their tires, and are fueled by the blood of demonic hamsters that are sacrificed in a convenient altar located in the trunk. You don't have to be a prissy automobile enthusiast to facepalm there. Computer and technology usage in television is typically not just "inaccurate because it's fantasy", it's 100% fantasy and/or science fiction in the case of shows like CSI or Bones.

Computers aren't rare or bizarre anymore. Everyone has an iPhone and computers are normal, everyday tools. Thus, the groaning from everyone who has the slightest bit of awareness of technology. The "turn off your brain, it's make-believe" argument is the way some people approach anything fictional, but the way most modern TV shows and movies use technology, is so horrible it becomes poor writing and detracts from the quality of the storytelling. It's worse when the technology is not just background flavor, but a major plot point; ala a CSI program - the writing becomes lazy and technology is a silly magic wand that just does whatever the writers want to make a plot twist happen.

If that's good enough entertainment for some, fine. You can't blame other people however, for pointing out that a show is just plain poorly written and riddled with absurdities. It's just computers being focused on right now; speaking more generally, a lot of these shows are filled with just plain dumb stuff on every count.

The flipside of nerdy elitism is people who say any criticism is just "elitist, stop thinking about it bro".

Edit: I'd add that the terrible use of technology for writing crutches is so bad, that other TV shows that are aimed at the same audience have begun to mock it. Castle is full of jokes at the expense of CSI and "magic crime technology", or unrealistic portrayals of police procedure on the typical, badly written American cop show.
 
A

aristotle

Member
Kaijima said:
You're taking this the wrong way. People don't make fun of The Last Starfighter because it's supposed to be fantasy, and its absurdity is done affectionately. War Games, much like Tron, is from prehistoric computer times, so silly and unrealistic conventions due to sheer ignorance about computers - which were a new and obscure technology - just cause a smile rather than eye rolling.

People snerk at these contemporary shows and their absurd portrayals of technology, because a computer is now an everyday tool. The kind of mistakes and bizarre ideas popular entertainment programs display about computers is typically beyond the level of a guitar chord being played incorrectly.

It's more like a procedural crime show set in relatively the real world, showing that contemporary cars don't have steering wheels, take photographs with their tires, and are fueled by the blood of demonic hamsters that are sacrificed in a convenient altar located in the trunk. You don't have to be a prissy automobile enthusiast to facepalm there. Computer and technology usage in television is typically not just "inaccurate because it's fantasy", it's 100% fantasy and/or science fiction in the case of shows like CSI or Bones.

Computers aren't rare or bizarre anymore. Everyone has an iPhone and computers are normal, everyday tools. Thus, the groaning from everyone who has the slightest bit of awareness of technology. The "turn off your brain, it's make-believe" argument is the way some people approach anything fictional, but the way most modern TV shows and movies use technology, is so horrible it becomes poor writing and detracts from the quality of the storytelling. It's worse when the technology is not just background flavor, but a major plot point; ala a CSI program - the writing becomes lazy and technology is a silly magic wand that just does whatever the writers want to make a plot twist happen.

If that's good enough entertainment for some, fine. You can't blame other people however, for pointing out that a show is just plain poorly written and riddled with absurdities. It's just computers being focused on right now; speaking more generally, a lot of these shows are filled with just plain dumb stuff on every count.

The flipside of nerdy elitism is people who say any criticism is just "elitist, stop thinking about it bro".

Edit: I'd add that the terrible use of technology for writing crutches is so bad, that other TV shows that are aimed at the same audience have begun to mock it. Castle is full of jokes at the expense of CSI and "magic crime technology", or unrealistic portrayals of police procedure on the typical, badly written American cop show.
Click to expand...


You have some valid points, but at the same time it's called Deus Ex Machina. Hell even Shakespeare wrote things that made absolutely no sense to get to the end of a plot point. And not everyone has an iphone and few people of the target audience know much about any of the things they describe in these procedural crime shows. If it sounds right for the audience, then it works. I've already stated and the main points of argument in this thread and the others like it who have come before, are posts from people who aren't the target audience. Complaining about these shows to me is like me going to a Sex & The City movie and bitching because they did something wrong in that movie. I'm not the target audience so they have no real reason to cater to my needs/wants. I'll give you CSI because everyone of it's shows are terrible and Caruso should have been let go eons ago.

Edit: Also my crack at the elitism here was trying to point out that one of the major reasons why video games in particular are so looked down on still is because of the posts in here that show some people are way too damn anal and uptight about something that is supposed to just be fun and entertaining. Sorry for the run-on sentences ;)
 
T

TheExodu5

Banned
Video games are looked down on because shows like this make it out to be an outlandish hobby for stereotypical basement dwellers and Star Trek fans.
 
A

aristotle

Member
TheExodu5 said:
Video games are looked down on because shows like this make it out to be an outlandish hobby for stereotypical basement dwellers and Star Trek fans.
Click to expand...


And not because of movies like Grandma's Boy which some people on this forum liked. Right! ;)

Hope you sense the sarcasm.
 
S

SteveWinwood

Member
TheExodu5 said:
Video games are looked down on because shows like this make it out to be an outlandish hobby for stereotypical basement dwellers and Star Trek fans.
Click to expand...
"I have a Captain Kirk costume in my closet."
 
M

Mistwalker

Member
XiaNaphryz said:
8dqGY.png
Click to expand...
Awesome.

And while you can argue that it's entertainment and not necessary to be technically accurate, some of the ideas themselves make no sense. A hacker kid who stores his transactions in his XBox, accessible only be reaching level 10 in Prince of Persia? So every time he needs to access that info he sits down and plays the game for x hours?

Still, you get conditioned to expect nothing remotely accurate from mainstream entertainment with regards to tech stuff, roll your eyes and move on. Reminds me of a friend in the military who after joining realized how inaccurate uniforms, insignias, forms of rank and other pseudo-military depictions tend to be. Fact is, most people don't care.
 
A

aristotle

Member
Mistwalker said:
Still, you get conditioned to expect nothing remotely accurate from mainstream entertainment with regards to tech stuff, roll your eyes and move on. Reminds me of a friend in the military who after joining realized how inaccurate uniforms, insignias, forms of rank and other pseudo-military depictions tend to be. Fact is, most people don't care.
Click to expand...


Exactly. I was in the military. If more people cared about technical details like that, people would go apeshit. Some of it is awe inspiring when you see what they do with military ranks in shows/movies. Pfft @ an E-1 guarding a high value person (especially alone). You just bypass the stupid and have fun with what is there.
 
M

magicalsoundshower

Member
Marleyman said:
These CBS crime shows were, I thought, only watched by senior citizens and human beings without a shred of knowledge about the real world. Every one of them is ridiculously over the top and there are always dead bodies around.
Click to expand...
I've been avoiding television like the plague for years and have been getting back into it lately for a couple reasons and to be honest I like NCIS quite a bit and I think it's quite a bit better than a lot of the crap out there. I'm really quite convinced it's supposed to be a borderline comedy show and if you watch it as such it can be highly entertaning, especially if you're watching it with friends. I think if you expect NCIS in particular to be accurate about pretty much anything, you're doing it wrong.
 
K

KevinCow

Banned
aristotle said:
Exactly. I was in the military. If more people cared about technical details like that, people would go apeshit. Some of it is awe inspiring when you see what they do with military ranks in shows/movies. Pfft @ an E-1 guarding a high value person (especially alone). You just bypass the stupid and have fun with what is there.
Click to expand...

But wouldn't it be nice if the writers did a tiny amount of research and got it even close to right?
 
A

AshMcCool

Member
Randolph Freelander said:
ITT gamers troll themselves

It's a TV show, people. Let's go complain about shocking a flatline next. It's fun!
Click to expand...

Does that still happen very often? I think the misconception is based of the confusion of a heartattack (which can lead to a CA) with a cardiac arrest(which means the heart is stopping alltogether).
 
J

Jim E. Rossler

Banned
KevinCow said:
But wouldn't it be nice if the writers did a tiny amount of research and got it even close to right?
Click to expand...
NO.
And the next time you see someone fire a 1911 and it shoots out incendiary Dragon's breath rounds that go through tanks,
Think "acceptable breaks from reality" and DEALWITHIT.jpg
Only NERDS care about technology and crap anyway.
 
J

Jim E. Rossler

Banned
AshMcCool said:
Does that still happen very often? I think the misconception is based of the confusion of a heartattack (which can lead to a CA) with a cardiac arrest(which means the heart is stopping alltogether).
Click to expand...
ALL THE TIME BRO.
I cant remember someone flatlining and they DIDN'T try Shock paddles.
 
H

HK-47

Oh, bitch bitch bitch.
chickdigger802 said:
Just shows tv writing hasn't changed much from the geordi leforge days.

The whole concept of crimes being solved at such a fast pace (usually in a handful of days tv time) is ridiculous if ya use 'real technology'.

Tv. Don't think too deeply about it ;)
Click to expand...

Then you get the CSI effect.
 
DR3AM

DR3AM

Member
The funny thing about all this is that some people watch this and they think I can do all that stuff too just becuase I know how to use a computer.

A friend wanted to spy on his GF and he asked me to hack her computer so that he could see who she was talking to. He thought it wouldnt be a problem for me. LOL
 
K

K.Sabot

Member
So I'm bumping this thread for a relevant update.

I was walking by my television after putting something in the oven, and I overheard this choice bit on a new NCIS.

"He was always going on about "Skyrim" and "Old Republic", you are talking about dorky roleplaying games aren't you? You're into those, right?"

And the response.

"Until I took an arrow to the knee."

Reddit officially ruining things outside of the internet.
 
B

BY2K

Membero Americo
K.Sabot said:
So I'm bumping this thread for a relevant update.

I was walking by my television after putting something in the oven, and I overheard this choice bit on a new NCIS.

"He was always going on about "Skyrim" and "Old Republic", you are talking about dorky roleplaying games aren't you? You're into those, right?"

And the response.

"Until I took an arrow to the knee."
Click to expand...

brb, jumping off a bridge.
 
xion4360

xion4360

Member
ill take this over the kids holding xbox 360 controllers but apparently playing a game that sounds like its running on gameboy
 
X

XiaNaphryz

LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
K.Sabot said:
So I'm bumping this thread for a relevant update.

I was walking by my television after putting something in the oven, and I overheard this choice bit on a new NCIS.

"He was always going on about "Skyrim" and "Old Republic", you are talking about dorky roleplaying games aren't you? You're into those, right?"

And the response.

"Until I took an arrow to the knee."
Click to expand...

Can't resist:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNDaG7YqaV4&hd#t=02m44s
 
S

salpa

Banned
bernardobri said:
It wasn't worse than this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkDD03yeLnU
Click to expand...

Not understanding the issue with this one.

VB is all about GUI interfaces, and doing things like tracking IP addresses is simple and easy to accomplish.

As for the NCIS thing, the funnier thing is how much people like to ridicule everything someone says that is misleading about computers. 16 cores is easy with a server, for less than $1000 even thanks to AMD, and a "10 meg pipe" is just a 10MB/s internet connection. And the guy could have easily identified the tower, not the monitor. I am into servers, and HP have very unique cases in their ProLiant class of servers. If I see one, I'd just as likely ask "Is that a G6 or a G7?" and if the latter, if it's 8 core or 12 core.

Honestly, sometimes I feel ashamed to be a PC gamer and to be into technology. Every person in that group seem to think that everyone is beneath them and it fucking sucks.
 
Robot Pants

Robot Pants

Member
I remember watching an old episode of Law and Order: SVU and those shows are always known for their ridiculous take on technology. Like FaceUnion and so on, but this one took the cake.
They had their "tech guy" trying to hack something and he says, "I'm trying to trace it back but the HTML is scrambled."
Then it showed an image of what was supposed to be code.

I sat there and said, "what the hell was that?"
Wasn't html, you can't scramble it, just ugghh oh well. Still funny.
 
S

salpa

Banned
Robot Pants said:
I remember watching an old episode of Law and Order: SVU and those shows are always known for their ridiculous take on technology. Like FaceUnion and so on, but this one took the cake.
They had their "tech guy" trying to hack something and he says, "I'm trying to trace it back but the HTML is scrambled."
Then it showed an image of what was supposed to be code.

I sat there and said, "what the hell was that?"
Wasn't html, you can't scramble it, just ugghh oh well. Still funny.
Click to expand...

You can scramble HTML with Javascript.
 
B

BatDan

Bane? Get them on board, I'll call it in.
xion4360 said:
ill take this over the kids holding xbox 360 controllers but apparently playing a game that sounds like its running on gameboy
Click to expand...

Pretty much this. I'll take overused memes over "Two-Player Final Fantasy VIII" or "Modern Game with Atari Sound Effects"
 
D

DukeTogo1300

Member
salpa said:
Not understanding the issue with this one.

VB is all about GUI interfaces, and doing things like tracking IP addresses is simple and easy to accomplish.

As for the NCIS thing, the funnier thing is how much people like to ridicule everything someone says that is misleading about computers. 16 cores is easy with a server, for less than $1000 even thanks to AMD, and a "10 meg pipe" is just a 10MB/s internet connection. And the guy could have easily identified the tower, not the monitor. I am into servers, and HP have very unique cases in their ProLiant class of servers. If I see one, I'd just as likely ask "Is that a G6 or a G7?" and if the latter, if it's 8 core or 12 core.

Honestly, sometimes I feel ashamed to be a PC gamer and to be into technology. Every person in that group seem to think that everyone is beneath them and it fucking sucks.
Click to expand...

You're kind of missing the point as far as why these scenes are funny, it has little to do with PC elitism.
 
T

Tomat

Wanna hear a good joke? Waste your time helping me! LOL!
phosphor112 said:
There is one thing I hate more than Reddit.

It's 9gag.

Too much trash going "mainstream."
Click to expand...

Pretty much in agreement with this. It's not that lingo related to video games is some sort of "secret club" stuff, but it really gets retarded when everyone starts using it and most people don't even know what the hell it means.
 
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