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If you lived in a traditional JRPG town, what would you do?

S

ScOULaris

Member
Dragon-Quest-9-Trailer.jpg


I sometimes like to imagine what life would be like if I was suddenly and inexplicably transported to a JRPG town. What would I do? How would I earn my living?

Realistically, I've always thought that it would be cool to be an Item Shop owner. Business is always good, since everyone needs items. You get to meet and talk to interesting people throughout the day, and it seems like it would provide me with a nice merchant-class income. I could probably even make enough to buy a lock for my house. That way, wandering adventurers won't come barging in and breaking all of my pots or opening all of my treasure chests.

I would also take my hard-earned money over to the town pub every now and then. Pubs are always my favorite part of RPG towns. :D

Also, I would try to make time to visit other towns in the region to sample the different cultures. Since I'd be the item shop owner, I could just stock up on potions or accessories that would keep monsters at bay during my travels.

What would your life be like in a JRPG town?
 
T

thetrin

Hail, peons, for I have come as ambassador from the great and bountiful Blueberry Butt Explosion
Buy swords and potions AND LEAVE TO GO DO SOMETHING INTERESTING.
 
B

BocoDragon

or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
I'd run the suspiciously 'free' inn, and then when adventurers are sleeping, I'd steal their gold pieces.
 
U

ultron87

Member
Move to the country. Less chance of dying out there when the town randomly explodes the first time the local orphan with a mysterious path leaves to get some fruit from the forest next door.
 
Freshmaker

Freshmaker

I am Korean.
I'd put my valuables dead center in the middle of my kitchen table. Heroes can't ever reach stuff on tables. I'd put poison darts and bombs in my cabinets.
 
S

Shadow Red

Member
Hang out in a restaurant and chat with my mouth's full...Grandia style! For some reason, I very much enjoy those little scenes.
 
P

Phenomic

Member
Not let some metrosexual hero run around my house that is kept unlocked 100% of the time and steal my stuff out of my large and steel made chests that mysteriously seem to lack keys.
 
S

Sectus

Member
Be driven absolutely mad that everybody can't hold a discussion beyond a single sentence, and how people keep asking rhetorical questions.

And once a farm burns down and there's one sole survivor which is a young kid, I'll make sure to join his party as he's bound to save the universe from a generic villain.
 
N

NullPointer

Member
Bash everybody's crates and then commit suicide.

What a fucking nightmare world that would be.

My last words would be "..."
 
C

cosmicblizzard

Banned
GUILD MEMBER! Those guys always have the most exciting lives assuming you aren't in a protagonist role.

College student is also an option seeing as you can major in magic and all that shit. Hopefully no memory loss is involved.
 
S

ScOULaris

Member
Another option would be to run around the central fountain nonstop for all eternity, only stopping briefly when approached to exclaim whatever has thrown me into such a fit.
 
S

sixteen-bit

Member
My only options would be remain an NPC and keep the same canned dialog forever or join the hero's quest so I'd go with the latter.
 
S

ScOULaris

Member
I always just assumed that JRPG towns were all based off of Canadian suburbs, given that door locks seem to be just for show.
 
B

BocoDragon

or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
ScOULaris said:
I always just assumed that JRPG towns were all based off of Canadian suburbs, given that door locks seem to be just for show.
Click to expand...
Don't believe Michael Moore movies.
 
E

Emitan

Member
BocoDragon said:
I'd run the suspiciously 'free' inn, and then when adventurers are sleeping, I'd steal their gold pieces.
Click to expand...
I'd run a free inn because it always mean an important plot even is about to occur. And my inn will become famous! Or get set on fire...
 
M

mjc

Member
I'd probably install a gate on the town's well so that when the heroes go down it looking for treasure, I can lock them in and sell them to the villain.
 
U

ultron87

Member
If I actually stayed in the town I'd probably stand around with an exclamation point over my head. Any hero that come along would be offered a small amount of gold or a trinket to do anything I need them to. Little do they know that the items they are getting me are worth way more on the open market than what I'm paying them. Muahahahahahaha.
 
B

BobsRevenge

I do not avoid women, GAF, but I do deny them my essence.
I'd take advantage of their limited conversation options and movement ability, and do whatever the fuck I want. Like, I dunno, stealing everyone's shit. Taking a shit on people's doorsteps. Just being outrageous.
 
K

Kinitari

Black Canada Mafia
Dress like a casual old man with a seedy past, and pull out my awesome super powers just when a monster attacks.
 
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