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anecdotes from depressed gaf

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D

drohne

hyperbolically metafictive
the best couple hours of my day are when my ambien fails to kick in and i feel really happy and optimistic and LIKE MYSELF BACK WHEN LIFE WASN'T A WRECK

then i realize it's 4:26 and my ambien didn't kick in, so tomorrow morning's going to be EXTRASHITTY

t-5 days to suicide
 
I

ItAintEasyBeinCheesy

it's 4th of July in my asshole
I just jacked it.

Breakfast, lunch and dinner. That's how I roll.

Was weird the other day, I was midway through through my "morning glory" and the air con repair man showed up.......... wanted to shake my hand............ fuck it, did anyway. Fuck him for working at 7am.
 
B

Billen

Banned
drohne said:
the best couple hours of my day are when my ambien fails to kick in and i feel really happy and optimistic and LIKE MYSELF BACK WHEN LIFE WASN'T A WRECK

then i realize it's 4:26 and my ambien didn't kick in, so tomorrow morning's going to be EXTRASHITTY

t-5 days to suicide
Click to expand...

So, what are the problems you are experiencing? Why such a wreck?
 
A

akachan ningen

Member
Tokubetsu said:
"This too shall pass." Nothing lasts forever and that goes for the good AND bad.
Click to expand...
that's just not true. some people have shit lives from beginning to end. just look at Africa. shit does not always pass.
 
K

keyboardcat

Member
somebody plz explain how ambien and similar drugs work? i don't get why it failing to kick in will cause a terrible morning. Sorry for the newb question.

also, since i'm relatively new here (>year) has GAF always had its fair share of depression threads or is it more recently?
 
Â

∀ Narayan

Member
ItAintEasyBeinCheesy said:
I just jacked it.

Breakfast, lunch and dinner. That's how I roll.

Was weird the other day, I was midway through through my "morning glory" and the air con repair man showed up.......... wanted to shake my hand............ fuck it, did anyway. Fuck him for working at 7am.
Click to expand...
Don't worry, the only reason why he even wanted to shake was because he could detect the penis juice on your hand.

Sleep with both eyes open tonight.
 
D

drohne

hyperbolically metafictive
eh, usual shit -- uncertain work/romantic/health situations -- just a load of it on my head at once, and i have heroically responded by spending all my free time on gaf. it'll sort out.

keyboardcat said:
somebody plz explain how ambien and similar drugs work? i don't get why it failing to kick in will cause a terrible morning. Sorry for the newb question.
Click to expand...

ambien is a hypnotic -- whatever the hell that means -- but if i'm wideawake now and have already shot my ambien load, i am just not going to get a good night's sleep. if i make any uncharacteristic late night posts - LIKE THIS THREAD, SAY - it's probly dat ambien talking
 
A

akachan ningen

Member
keyboardcat said:
somebody plz explain how ambien and similar drugs work? i don't get why it failing to kick in will cause a terrible morning. Sorry for the newb question.

also, since i'm relatively new here (>year) has GAF always had its fair share of depression threads or is it more recently?
Click to expand...
Overall, depression is on the rise in America. It has to do with the state the world's in, the economy, standards of living, increased detachment from society, etc.
 
T

Trent Strong

Banned
Girl of sixteen, whole life ahead of her
Slashed her wrists, bored with life
Didn't succeed, thank the Lord
For small mercies

Fighting back the tears, mother reads the note again
Sixteen candles burn in her mind
She takes the blame, it's always the same
She goes down on her knees and prays

I don't want to start any blasphemous rumours
But I think that God's got a sick sense of humor
And when I die I expect to find Him laughing

Girl of eighteen, fell in love with everything
Found new life in Jesus Christ
Hit by a car, ended up
On a life support machine

Summer's day, as she passed away
Birds were singing in the summer sky
Then came the rain, and once again
A tear fell from her mother's eye

I don't want to start any blasphemous rumours
But I think that God's got a sick sense of humor
And when I die I expect to find Him laughing
 
Tokubetsu

Tokubetsu

Member
akachan ningen said:
that's just not true. some people have shit lives from beginning to end. just look at Africa. shit does not always pass.
Click to expand...
I'm sure they have moments of happiness. However brief they maybe.
 
R

RumblingRosco

Member
J-Rod said:
Seems to me many people that spend a lot of their free time on the internet are depressed.
Click to expand...

Which begs the question, do people with depression flock to the internet or does spending too much time on the internet (and, therefore, less time physically interacting with other people) increase the incidence of depression?
 
J

J-Rod

Member
Soka said:
Which begs the question, do people with depression flock to the internet or does spending too much time on the internet (and, therefore, less time physically interacting with other people) increase the incidence of depression?
Click to expand...
I speculate that it is a bit of both, but it'd be interesting to see a study done on it.
 
X

xxjuicesxx

Member
Soka said:
Which begs the question, do people with depression flock to the internet or does spending too much time on the internet (and, therefore, less time physically interacting with other people) increase the incidence of depression?
Click to expand...

second one, without a doubt.

I think the internet just becomes a comfort zone for people and they start to spend less time out talk to less people because its easier just to avoid any of that stress. At least I've done that. After talking to less n less people you start to lose chances towards relationships/sex/friendship too. Its fucked up but theres hope, there is still crack/cocaine.

What?
 
C

Callo Merlose

Banned
We have 4 days to save your life, but I really hope you can manage afterwards. Remember the fuckton of crap I went through over here all those years ago? Wasn't fun. Was loopy. Head wasn't on right. Still ain't, but it's on tighter now. Give yourself time to become as awesome as you can be, drohne.
 
J

Jayge

Member
Soka said:
Which begs the question, do people with depression flock to the internet or does spending too much time on the internet (and, therefore, less time physically interacting with other people) increase the incidence of depression?
Click to expand...
I was depressed long before I began my journey into the internet. It's more vital than ever to me now, because I have no other real way of making plans with friends or anything since most of us are not in school (or the same school) anymore. I took a break from facebook for like a week then realized that social networking and texting were what kept my physical social life alive as well. That'll change once I actually go to school and/or get a job but for now it's a necessity.

My biggest annoyance is that I can relate to a ton of my friends' feelings and issues, but nobody seems to know what the fuck I'm on about when they ask me what's fucked in my head. It gets frustrating.
 
J

Jangocube

Banned
drohne said:
the best couple hours of my day are when my ambien fails to kick in and i feel really happy and optimistic and LIKE MYSELF BACK WHEN LIFE WASN'T A WRECK

then i realize it's 4:26 and my ambien didn't kick in, so tomorrow morning's going to be EXTRASHITTY

t-5 days to suicide
Click to expand...

I just started Lexapro and Ritalin last week.

Man, Ritalin makes you feel goooooood. Side effects blow, but whatever.
 
G

GavinGT

Banned
Every night I dream about my last ex-girlfriend, a girl that I only dated for like 2 months. But it's always her with her new boyfriend, and I'm always being rejected. It's like I've been re-living the last day of our relationship for two years.
 
V

Vox-Pop

Contains Sucralose
was trying to get pills this week from my doctor but they wouldn't let me have an appointment this week. have to wait a month.

i just decided to be drugged as possible for the rest of my life.
 
C

Clydefrog

Member
GavinGT said:
Every night I dream about my last ex-girlfriend, a girl that I only dated for like 2 months. But it's always her with her new boyfriend, and I'm always being rejected. It's like I've been re-living the last day of our relationship for two years.
Click to expand...


Shiiit man, I just had a dream last night about my ex. We dated for four years (age 21 - 25). The dream: I was at a bar and I saw her there. I was talking with this other girl at the bar and said "can do you me a huge favor? my ex is over there. just act like you're really into me and stuff." "oh I don't have to act ;)" "sweet"

of course i wouldn't act like this in real life nor would it ever happen, but it felt good man.
 
D

Drewsky

Member
Vox-Pop said:
was trying to get pills this week from my doctor but they wouldn't let me have an appointment this week. have to wait a month.

i just decided to be drugged as possible for the rest of my life.
Click to expand...
The only way to go.
 
J

Jangocube

Banned
Vox-Pop said:
was trying to get pills this week from my doctor but they wouldn't let me have an appointment this week. have to wait a month.

i just decided to be drugged as possible for the rest of my life.
Click to expand...

Yeah me too.

Why not? Feels good man.
 
P

Pinko Marx

Banned
Soka said:
Which begs the question, do people with depression flock to the internet or does spending too much time on the internet (and, therefore, less time physically interacting with other people) increase the incidence of depression?
Click to expand...

Bit of both. Being depressed, people find a place to escape (the internet). But staying on the internet all day long isn't gunna help make your life better. Instead of being proactive and going out and finding a way to fix the shithole they find themselves in, they'd rather wallow in their pain and pity.
 
T

The Technomancer

card-carrying scientician
GavinGT said:
Every night I dream about my last ex-girlfriend, a girl that I only dated for like 2 months. But it's always her with her new boyfriend, and I'm always being rejected. It's like I've been re-living the last day of our relationship for two years.
Click to expand...
Dude, you don't have to be depressed for that. It doesn't go as far as actual dreams, but I've been in that place for the last year. This valentines day is the one-year anniversary of her dumping me for her ex.
 
L

lunarworks

Member
Jayge said:
I was depressed long before I began my journey into the internet.
Click to expand...
Yup, my life has been a wreck since well before the first time some network TV morning show host muttered "What's the Internet?" But it's pretty much laid waste to the last ten years of my life.

Keep on truckin'! (Whatever the fuck that means.)
 
way more

way more

Member
Hari Seldon said:
What does Ambien do and why are you taking it if it makes you feel like shit?
Click to expand...


It makes you sleep. When you are depressed you forget how to fall asleep and how to wake up.


Vox-Pop said:
was trying to get pills this week from my doctor but they wouldn't let me have an appointment this week. have to wait a month.

i just decided to be drugged as possible for the rest of my life.
Click to expand...

You mean chemical castration to stem your 'urges.' We are talking about anti-depressants.
 
S

Schmattakopf

Member
drohne said:
the best couple hours of my day are when my ambien fails to kick in and i feel really happy and optimistic and LIKE MYSELF BACK WHEN LIFE WASN'T A WRECK

then i realize it's 4:26 and my ambien didn't kick in, so tomorrow morning's going to be EXTRASHITTY

t-5 days to suicide
Click to expand...
Hari Seldon said:
What does Ambien do and why are you taking it if it makes you feel like shit?
Click to expand...
Zolpidem was awesome when it still affected me. It gives you a benzo-like high.
 
T

TL4E

Member
If I'm feeling down, I run 10 miles and feel all better and then some.



Schmattakopf said:
Zolpidem was awesome when it still affected me. It gives you a benzo-like high.
Click to expand...

I've never gotten a high from benzodiazepines, more like a drunken "I'm too stupid to care about anything" feeling (without the hangover). However, I'm very interested in trying zolpidem -- I have quite a stock too -- but the horror stories terrify me.

I mean, I don't want to go to Wendy's at 2AM completely out of my mind.
 
A

Atramental

Banned
Got back home at around 5 p.m. Worked on another time consuming design project from 7 p.m. to 12 a.m.

And here I am sitting alone in the dark at 2 a.m. on NeoGAF. My only social life.
 
S

Schmattakopf

Member
TL4E said:
I've never gotten a high from benzodiazepines, more like a drunken "I'm too stupid to care about anything" feeling (without the hangover). However, I'm very interested in trying zolpidem -- I have quite a stock too -- but the horror stories terrify me.

I mean, I don't want to go to Wendy's at 2AM completely out of my mind.
Click to expand...
Actually yeah, I have no way to explain the high. I hesitate to compare it to weed but I guess indica? If you're worried, be a little confined and don't take a large dose. Same precautions as weed, really.

It was just great for me because a) it did something, b) it worked as an analgesic and c) it gave me an appetite.
 
T

TL4E

Member
Schmattakopf said:
Actually yeah, I have no way to explain the high. I hesitate to compare it to weed but I guess indica? If you're worried, be a little confined and don't take a large dose. Same precautions as weed, really.

It was just great for me because a) it did something, b) it worked as an analgesic and c) it gave me an appetite.
Click to expand...
That's interesting. a b & c are all uninteresting to me, but I'm still very much interested in the supposed euphoria zolpidem causes when you "resist the urge" to fall asleep. Hallucinations are fun, too.
 
S

Schmattakopf

Member
TL4E said:
That's interesting. a b & c are all uninteresting to me, but I'm still very much interested in the supposed euphoria zolpidem causes when you "resist the urge" to fall asleep. Hallucinations are fun, too.
Click to expand...
I definitely have different interests because of medical problems but the euphoria is still great. The hallucinations come with high doses and that's just a bad idea.
 
G

GDGF

Soothsayer
Shit sucked, but shit got better. I was pretty fucked up for a while there. Depression. Chronic headaches that lasted for days and days. Joint pain. Lack of motivation. It was no good. Saw a shrink about three months ago and started taking Paxil. I've heard a lot of bad things about it, but it worked for me. I haven't felt this good in years.
 
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