So when they find you interesting you move them over to WhatsApp or the chat app of your choice. Biggety bam
-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
- Thread starter gaiages
- Start date
- Status
So when they find you interesting you move them over to WhatsApp or the chat app of your choice. Biggety bam
Gotdatmoney
Member
Krauser Kat
Member
does this imply a snail has crawled inside of her leaving a trail. Im just trying to get the clearest picture.
snails move around by using slime or whatever to gain momentum
It refers more to the "mess" that can be left behind. Imagine a girl with no panties and a short skirt on a motorbike...
Krauser Kat
Member
OOOO. OOO. nuff said.
artsi
Member
Yeah she picked me up via Instagram DM's after I liked her photos
Not a model but could be.
Bot? Got a red flag quickly?
Raptomex
Member
Exchanged hello's and she's already horny with a link to prove it.
SmackDaddy
Member
Raptomex
Member
Is this a common thing now?
That sounds like financial suicide.
I mean if he's actually dating her I doubt he's paying
Gotdatmoney
Member
The links probably a chain letter saying if you don't share it on Gaf you'll have a lifetime of bad dating.
So I've got a friend who is talking to a guy on Tinder and after hours of conversation she gave him her number. He responds with something like "Tinder is always an option but thanks." He never texted her but he still talks to her on Tinder. We both thought it was weird as fuck. What could he want? If he didn't accept because he didn't like her then why is he still messaging her (often first) on Tinder? If he just wants to fuck why not go for the number? If her giving out her number turned him off then again, why keep messaging her?
Maybe he doesn't want her to have his number? Something to hide or paranoid about people having his real number?
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
It's annoying, arguably, to add people to your phone if you've never met them before. One of those unwritten rules; there's like no malice behind it, but it's a minority view to be sure.
Miles Quaritch
Member
Moderation my dude.
You'll be looking dapper as fuck and in a location with lots of people, work that ass and get some numbers.
I mean, I personally just text the number and don't add them to my contacts or anything. That way I can just delete the thread whenever. Then dude hasn't even asked her out though and it's been 3 days. He's tried it every flirty and make dirty jokes that kind of imply he wants to fuck but he doesn't make a move. We're beginning to think he simply has no game.
Start having a good talk with a Tinder match. The usual hobbies, work, goals and whatnot talk.
Then ask if she has plans this weekend. She says not yet. Then asks me. Said I don't have any either... unless she wants to meet up.
She's not rejecting the idea and then asks me if I have facebook. Said yes. She asked my name. Gave it.
That was two hours ago. No reply since then.
did i just blow it or was she disappointed with my facebook account, whew
Then ask if she has plans this weekend. She says not yet. Then asks me. Said I don't have any either... unless she wants to meet up.
She's not rejecting the idea and then asks me if I have facebook. Said yes. She asked my name. Gave it.
That was two hours ago. No reply since then.
did i just blow it or was she disappointed with my facebook account, whew
Megalosaro
Banned
Fuck her. I didn't give my girlfriend my Facebook until a month after we started dating
LookAtMeGo
Member
Its only been 2 hours. Once Friday night hits I'd be like fuuuuck
Ask him for his Neogaf account instead of number next time.
Subpar Scrub
Banned
Of course, my employment relies on me having a good social standing and nothing unprofessional on social media, so I never get blind.
And will
(attempt)
always crazy bacon
Banned
Did you draw her like a French girl?
Tru but I always get so insecure and think I blew it when they stop replying like that.
Especially since I get fewer and fewer matches these days so it's not like I can just move on to the next one ;_;
stn
Member
Its possible she scrolled through your pics right after adding you, then decided she's not interested. If that's the case, you didn't blow anything; in fact, you saved yourself a bad date. HOWEVER, give her some time to reply first. Don't panic yet.
Baron von Loathsome
Member
I dunno, it seems a little soon.
EchoChamber
Member
Only two hours bro, you just need to wait.
LookAtMeGo
Member
I do too man. Just got to give it time sometimes. There are a million reasons why she might have stopped replying. I know the timing is shitty but just wait and if she doesnt come around by friday eve then either holler at her again and see whats up or just try and find another one.
You didnt do anything wrong here. If she is ghosting you cuz she didnt like your facebook then shes probably not worth your time.
Jzero
Member
For real, I've dated people that always reply 8 hours later (deal breaker btw)
finalflame
Member
I fucking hate people like this. Also, this:
It just reeks of "I don't give a fuck", and if that's the case, neither do I.
Pattycakes
Banned
Figured I'd make a post here (for reference, yes, I am a girl).
I met another girl online, and we've been talking for a few weeks. She lives in the UK, I live in the US, so timezones are a bitch, but I was and am willing to give LDR a shot, even if it means we can't meet up face to face until Christmas time (the soonest our schedules would work out).
I've been enjoying her company, keeping it casual, playing some video games together, watching some synced up TV shows. Everything seemed to be going smoothly until we had a discussion kind of out of the blue about what the idea of marriage, dating goals, etc was to each of us, and we had a pretty strong difference of opinion on the subject initially, although we both said we'd be willing to compromise and work with any partner we had. I thought things were settled that night. They were not.
The next day, we have a little follow-up conversation, I smooth things over, feel like the problem is settled more or less. She wants to take some time to herself, talk with some other friends, and I'm fine with that so we don't do any voice chat that night (Tuesday).
Yesterday, back to our good old conversations, things are going well, but she's tired at work in the mornings so I tell her to not worry about talking to me via voice or video and just go to bed, since I don't get off until like 10pm her time and she has to up at 6 am. I send her a sweet note for her when she wakes up in the morning, then go to bed later last night.
Today, I wake up and there's no messages or anything from her which is abnormal. I was pretty sure something was wrong, but I wasn't sure if it was just my insecurities acting up. I sent one good morning message, then don't hear from her until lunch time. She says now things aren't feeling the same, needs time to think things through, feeling like she's in a limbo with everything.
So now it seems like everything still isn't okay, even though I thought we had smoothed everything over. I try and talk to her, but there's another problem, which is where this starts to get complicated.
She's got a friend in the Philippines, also a girl, who is her closest friend. This friend was dating another girl, and she (my date) was feeling like a third wheel, so she was winding down spending time with them online. She has told me she had feelings for this person in the past, but then her friend started dating so that died out.That friend's girlfriend turned out to be catfishing her, which came to light today, right as I was trying to talk to my date.
Date tells me that she's still having problems because of the conversation a few days ago, and she doesn't know what she wants now. So, clearly, that previous conversation from a few days ago hasn't been put to bed yet, despite my thinking it had. Yet, she's got her friend in dire need, so she spends the rest of the day talking to her, texting me a little bit, but I assume mostly distracted by her friend and trying to help her, so I don't press her to talk to me.
That leads up to right now. I'm still stuck in limbo. I'm not sure if I should keep talking to this girl, remain friends but put dating off the table, or cut loose and run. I really do like her and getting to know her has been on the bright spots of the past month. Because I'm going to be moving soon in the US, I'm not looking to jump right back into the dating pool if this doesn't pan out, so I feel like I can afford to wait it out. I don't know GAF. I'm not sure if this one is going to pan out.
I met another girl online, and we've been talking for a few weeks. She lives in the UK, I live in the US, so timezones are a bitch, but I was and am willing to give LDR a shot, even if it means we can't meet up face to face until Christmas time (the soonest our schedules would work out).
I've been enjoying her company, keeping it casual, playing some video games together, watching some synced up TV shows. Everything seemed to be going smoothly until we had a discussion kind of out of the blue about what the idea of marriage, dating goals, etc was to each of us, and we had a pretty strong difference of opinion on the subject initially, although we both said we'd be willing to compromise and work with any partner we had. I thought things were settled that night. They were not.
The next day, we have a little follow-up conversation, I smooth things over, feel like the problem is settled more or less. She wants to take some time to herself, talk with some other friends, and I'm fine with that so we don't do any voice chat that night (Tuesday).
Yesterday, back to our good old conversations, things are going well, but she's tired at work in the mornings so I tell her to not worry about talking to me via voice or video and just go to bed, since I don't get off until like 10pm her time and she has to up at 6 am. I send her a sweet note for her when she wakes up in the morning, then go to bed later last night.
Today, I wake up and there's no messages or anything from her which is abnormal. I was pretty sure something was wrong, but I wasn't sure if it was just my insecurities acting up. I sent one good morning message, then don't hear from her until lunch time. She says now things aren't feeling the same, needs time to think things through, feeling like she's in a limbo with everything.
So now it seems like everything still isn't okay, even though I thought we had smoothed everything over. I try and talk to her, but there's another problem, which is where this starts to get complicated.
She's got a friend in the Philippines, also a girl, who is her closest friend. This friend was dating another girl, and she (my date) was feeling like a third wheel, so she was winding down spending time with them online. She has told me she had feelings for this person in the past, but then her friend started dating so that died out.That friend's girlfriend turned out to be catfishing her, which came to light today, right as I was trying to talk to my date.
Date tells me that she's still having problems because of the conversation a few days ago, and she doesn't know what she wants now. So, clearly, that previous conversation from a few days ago hasn't been put to bed yet, despite my thinking it had. Yet, she's got her friend in dire need, so she spends the rest of the day talking to her, texting me a little bit, but I assume mostly distracted by her friend and trying to help her, so I don't press her to talk to me.
That leads up to right now. I'm still stuck in limbo. I'm not sure if I should keep talking to this girl, remain friends but put dating off the table, or cut loose and run. I really do like her and getting to know her has been on the bright spots of the past month. Because I'm going to be moving soon in the US, I'm not looking to jump right back into the dating pool if this doesn't pan out, so I feel like I can afford to wait it out. I don't know GAF. I'm not sure if this one is going to pan out.
always crazy bacon
Banned
Sounds like a lot of drama you don't need to get mixed up in, added to the fact that you live in different countries the odds of it going anywhere are slim. I'd look more at dating locally so you can actually go on dates.
First things first, I'm drunk but sobering up slightly.
Now that thats out of the way, I want your opinion GAF.
Matched with this girl. We spoke for a bit and I got her number and it was all cool. Spoke for a bit after that. She asked for my insatgram which I was a bit hesitant to do so at first as I post like 4 times a year on there, but I did actually recently post a few pictures within the last few months at the time so I thought why not?, and the first thing she says to me after following and looking at my pictures is ”Do you have a girl? cause that pic you posted recently suggests so and I'm not about competing with others" (or something along those lines) , as I posted a picture of a catchup meal between me and an old FEMALE FRIEND of mine who I had not seen in ages. So I told her that she was just a friend and that seemed to be the end of that.
We arranged to meet a few days after but life got in the way and we never did get round to doing so. (this is about 2 weeks after exchanging numbers).
One of the reasons being that she was going to visit a different city for a few days for a friends birthday do when I suggested a day we meet. Granted she never asked to do an alternative or asked when I was free next so I feel right now looking back like that was an early sign that she just didn't care much I dunno, but obviously at the time you don't really think about these things.
Always. Fast forward a week or two. I don't really remember, but I popped up on whastapp asking her how her time away was....and no reply....despite reading it too. Thats cool though, I understand people are busy, shit happens and stuff so I didn't read too much into it...eventhough her whaspapp pic would change every few days and her online time was frequently showing she was active.
So I leave it for a bit cause I don't wanna be that guy that seemes desperate and needy and messaging someone after being blanked, plus I got shit to do so I have greater things to concern myself with.
After several weeks, I add her on snapchat through my contacts list on a night out and she adds me back to my surprise. I send her a few snaps over a few weeks/ a couple of months but they don't really go anywhere. A selfie of me looking pretty with filter when i first added her and she replied to that, but then didn't reply to my reply, and recently about a week ago I replied to something she cooked on on her story which looked really tasty, asking what it was that she cooked.
She replied telling me what it was within literally like 2 minutes, and so I took this as a chance to try and spark things back up, mentioning that we haven't spoke properly in a while since we exchanged numbers and asking how she is seeing as she is obviously at least free to talk somewhat if she replied so quickly...Thats it, nothing crazy. Again, she opens it, reads it, and says NOTHING as if i sent her nothing at all.
So I'm like ”fuck it I cannt be arsed anymore" and about a week and a half goes by and here we are tonight. I go out and im with friends having a good time in the bars and and stuff drinking, dancing, catching up and I see a picture of the singer Rita Ora on the wall who I have had a crush on SINCE DAY ONE. So drunk me thinks ”I'm gonna snapchat this picture" and does so, captioning it with the word ”WIFE" and sending it to a hand full of friends in which she was part of. Fucking harmless IMO, its not like I'm gonna fuckin bump into Rita tomorrow and marry her so yeah.
Anyways, I get a chat reply from this girl all like ”Hey, can you not send me stuff unless its to do with me personally?"
And I'm like ”what? Its just a harness picture/snap. don't look into it that much it aint that serious"
And then she replies ”That sort of stuff should go on your story, not direct to me".
I don't know if it was the alcohol or the fact that i know deep down she can OBVIOUSLY reply to me at anytime cause she is on her phone like 23 hours a fuckin day according to her instagram, snapchat and whatsapp, but i just fuckin broke. I literally in the middle of the dance floor stopped, what i was doing, and just erased and blocked her on EVERYTHING I had. It was going nowhere, she had the chance to talk to me and stuff is she wanted but she didn't make the effort/meet me half way, and Its only now after sobering up slightly that I'm feeling like a jumped the gun a little bit.
I will probably wake up tomorrow and review what happened and make my own conclusion, but my feelings right now feel a little varied. I feel like I did take it a little harsh, but at the same time i don't have time to waste on people that are not going to put in the amount of effort that I do, but when it suits them, they can obviously make the time to pick and choose what they reply and don't reply to. And EVEN WORSE feel the need to like...criticise me when it suits them for something that should have simply just been something they chuckled at and not taken seriously.
Am I harsh for doing so?
I don't fucking know, I'm going to bed.
Tl;DR
Matched with girl. Things were gong well. Girl decides she isn't going to reply anymore when it comes do decent conversation. After ages months I send her a harmless snapchat and she replies telling me not to send her shit that doesn't concern her. I jump the gun and fuckin erase her out my life. I feel like i might have jumped a bit too far but I'm drumk so whatever fam.
EDIT. -FUCK ME THIS IS LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.
Now that thats out of the way, I want your opinion GAF.
Matched with this girl. We spoke for a bit and I got her number and it was all cool. Spoke for a bit after that. She asked for my insatgram which I was a bit hesitant to do so at first as I post like 4 times a year on there, but I did actually recently post a few pictures within the last few months at the time so I thought why not?, and the first thing she says to me after following and looking at my pictures is ”Do you have a girl? cause that pic you posted recently suggests so and I'm not about competing with others" (or something along those lines) , as I posted a picture of a catchup meal between me and an old FEMALE FRIEND of mine who I had not seen in ages. So I told her that she was just a friend and that seemed to be the end of that.
We arranged to meet a few days after but life got in the way and we never did get round to doing so. (this is about 2 weeks after exchanging numbers).
One of the reasons being that she was going to visit a different city for a few days for a friends birthday do when I suggested a day we meet. Granted she never asked to do an alternative or asked when I was free next so I feel right now looking back like that was an early sign that she just didn't care much I dunno, but obviously at the time you don't really think about these things.
Always. Fast forward a week or two. I don't really remember, but I popped up on whastapp asking her how her time away was....and no reply....despite reading it too. Thats cool though, I understand people are busy, shit happens and stuff so I didn't read too much into it...eventhough her whaspapp pic would change every few days and her online time was frequently showing she was active.
So I leave it for a bit cause I don't wanna be that guy that seemes desperate and needy and messaging someone after being blanked, plus I got shit to do so I have greater things to concern myself with.
After several weeks, I add her on snapchat through my contacts list on a night out and she adds me back to my surprise. I send her a few snaps over a few weeks/ a couple of months but they don't really go anywhere. A selfie of me looking pretty with filter when i first added her and she replied to that, but then didn't reply to my reply, and recently about a week ago I replied to something she cooked on on her story which looked really tasty, asking what it was that she cooked.
She replied telling me what it was within literally like 2 minutes, and so I took this as a chance to try and spark things back up, mentioning that we haven't spoke properly in a while since we exchanged numbers and asking how she is seeing as she is obviously at least free to talk somewhat if she replied so quickly...Thats it, nothing crazy. Again, she opens it, reads it, and says NOTHING as if i sent her nothing at all.
So I'm like ”fuck it I cannt be arsed anymore" and about a week and a half goes by and here we are tonight. I go out and im with friends having a good time in the bars and and stuff drinking, dancing, catching up and I see a picture of the singer Rita Ora on the wall who I have had a crush on SINCE DAY ONE. So drunk me thinks ”I'm gonna snapchat this picture" and does so, captioning it with the word ”WIFE" and sending it to a hand full of friends in which she was part of. Fucking harmless IMO, its not like I'm gonna fuckin bump into Rita tomorrow and marry her so yeah.
Anyways, I get a chat reply from this girl all like ”Hey, can you not send me stuff unless its to do with me personally?"
And I'm like ”what? Its just a harness picture/snap. don't look into it that much it aint that serious"
And then she replies ”That sort of stuff should go on your story, not direct to me".
I don't know if it was the alcohol or the fact that i know deep down she can OBVIOUSLY reply to me at anytime cause she is on her phone like 23 hours a fuckin day according to her instagram, snapchat and whatsapp, but i just fuckin broke. I literally in the middle of the dance floor stopped, what i was doing, and just erased and blocked her on EVERYTHING I had. It was going nowhere, she had the chance to talk to me and stuff is she wanted but she didn't make the effort/meet me half way, and Its only now after sobering up slightly that I'm feeling like a jumped the gun a little bit.
I will probably wake up tomorrow and review what happened and make my own conclusion, but my feelings right now feel a little varied. I feel like I did take it a little harsh, but at the same time i don't have time to waste on people that are not going to put in the amount of effort that I do, but when it suits them, they can obviously make the time to pick and choose what they reply and don't reply to. And EVEN WORSE feel the need to like...criticise me when it suits them for something that should have simply just been something they chuckled at and not taken seriously.
Am I harsh for doing so?
I don't fucking know, I'm going to bed.
Tl;DR
Matched with girl. Things were gong well. Girl decides she isn't going to reply anymore when it comes do decent conversation. After ages months I send her a harmless snapchat and she replies telling me not to send her shit that doesn't concern her. I jump the gun and fuckin erase her out my life. I feel like i might have jumped a bit too far but I'm drumk so whatever fam.
EDIT. -FUCK ME THIS IS LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.
Okay everyone there's a friendship OT now so please go there for friendship stuff
http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=1405698
http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=1405698
The girl wasn't interested in you as you should have recognized from the fact that she wasn't replying to your messages.
You were right to delete her. You should have done so much, much earlier. Your mistake was getting so invested in a person you had never met.
You attempted to rekindle the conversation multiple times and failed. She wasn't interested.
In general, try to meet up with people from dating apps sooner rather than later. That way there's less of a chance of them getting bored.
TheLostBigBoss
Banned
does this mean I'm stuck in the friend zone
I feel like it's not going to last long lol. It's basically just another off topic hang out place.
But I won't bring up any of my stuff in here (though I haven't for a bit anyway haha) anymore.
Communicating for that long...why? Just why? If a girl is unwilling to date you for months, what did you expect to happen?
A thread for Gaffers to make online friends with other Gaffers...increased dependence on online for social interaction is the exact opposite of what GAF needs
timetokill
Banned
So it's a little hard to parse because it comes across that you think this girl is probably hitting it off with her original crush now that she's "available" and that is certainly possible but it could also just be the read from how you're framing the situation.
How old are you two? If you're young it could just be that she doesn't know what the hell she wants. I'm running into a lot of girls that are on that wavelength lately. If she's older, it could be that she knows exactly what she wants and your conversation struck a really negative note.
Marriage etc goals are a pretty big deal, and I don't know how you two disagreed but it can be a really big issue. It's a lot easier to say you'd compromise with somebody about it and smooth things over but really those kinds of feelings are often very deeply rooted and aren't really something that can be dismissed with compromise. I had a similar sort of situation with my ex about whether or not we wanted children, and we kind of smoothed over it at the beginning because we were way into each other, but then after a while that stuff rears its ugly head again. And on some stuff there really isn't a possible compromise.
Anyway, my feeling generally is to let things go for a little bit and let her figure some stuff out. She'll come back if it was meant to be, and when you talk again you should say how happy you are to hear from her again, etc, without trying to push guilt or anything. Sometimes being a good friend or partner is knowing when to back off but being as welcoming as possible when they come back around.
SmackDaddy
Member
hey yall! I put a picture on dating apps of myself that I thought was quite fetching about a month ago, maybe more. Since then I've swiped many ladies and have gotten several matches, but 0 responses when messaging back. Is this a bad picture and I'm completely blind to what is actually attractive about me and what isn't? I leave what I think are thoughtful, funny, concise messages to matches, and my profile is short and sweet and has a joke in it, so I don't know what else is wrong besides my pics.
I would show this to my friends, but I want GAF's unbiased opinions. Thanks to those who reply.
btw- this is cropped in on my face. Friends are in the background in the original
Edit: Took the photo down. Thanks everyone
I would show this to my friends, but I want GAF's unbiased opinions. Thanks to those who reply.
btw- this is cropped in on my face. Friends are in the background in the original
Edit: Took the photo down. Thanks everyone
always crazy bacon
Banned
hey yall! I put a picture on dating apps of myself that I thought was quite fetching about a month ago, maybe more. Since then I've swiped many ladies and have gotten several matches, but 0 responses when messaging back. Is this a bad picture and I'm completely blind to what is actually attractive about me and what isn't? I leave what I think are thoughtful, funny, concise messages to matches, and my profile is short and sweet and has a joke in it, so I don't know what else is wrong besides my pics.
I would show this to my friends, but I want GAF's unbiased opinions. Thanks to those who reply.
btw- this is cropped in on my face. Friends are in the background in the original
http://i.imgur.com/KRiz0Jf.jpg
What the fuck is wrong with your right ear? That big cheesy smile is probably not what you want to go for on a profile picture, find one that makes you look a bit more mature and if the writing style of your profile is anything like your posting style on here, well that's what's possibly wrong. I'm only one data point, wait for more responses.
SmackDaddy
Member
My right ear has the left/right scroll indicator from facebook photos over it :|
Good call out on the maturity thing though. I'm 28, and could pass for a super young-un in this pic
- Status