what will a gym help if you have ugly facial features?
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I'm ugly
- Thread starter Flowmoney
- Start date
what will a gym help if you have ugly facial features?
Puck Beaverton
Banned
butterfaces get laid bro
Superficiality will get you laid easier, so if you want to easily have sex or be objectified, you're set if you're physically attractive. It won't necessarily solve the rest of your problems.
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
This is true. Probably a bunch of people live most of their lives on their own, and even die alone, but there's nothing wrong with that. The whole business about love and romance and sex, that's all just biological stuff, we're above that as a species. You can have fun by yourself, nobody really needs other people.
This is great. You're great.
rocketskates
Member
Yeah OP with no pics showing proof you're either a desperate average looking person looking to validate themselves or you actually do need a paper bag on their head.
Holy shit, well said.
I don't like feel comfortable with how I look but when i started wearing winter hats all day everyday It made me feel more comfortable with how i look for some reason.It's like getting your head gently hugged all day.
Puck Beaverton
Banned
What if you can't? 🤔
So what about that remaining 15%? Where does it come from and how can we fix it?
Eh i feel you act the way you want to be perceived. Maybe i have low self esteem but my girlfriend and my friends think i am attractive. But i feel like i am bullshitting everybody. So you just run up to that girl and say "i know im pretty hot, but dont be alarmed and give me your number"
Just act the way you want to be.
Just act the way you want to be.
How About No
Member
idk but 85% seems like a good place to end up at
IMO you can have a decent body & decent hygiene but if you have terrible facial features and structure, it really shows... (like me, for example)
I lost around 90 pounds to end up around 170, realized I was just hideous as everyone back in school said regardless of weight, then went through a series of a mental and physical health issues that culminated in me regaining those 90 pounds. I'm on a ton of meds now, including beta blockers that keep my energy low, so I can't really workout anymore and the motivation is kind of gone after finding out that depression robbed me of enjoying things like hiking that benefited from being fit and there's little reason to do it for appearance's sake. Though, then again, I think 95% of attractiveness lies in a person's face, so physical fitness, dress, and other factors really don't do much to begin with.
I write all this not because I have a solution to prescribe but more to encourage you to perhaps look towards therapy or other solutions- exercise can lead to good things but it's best not to have unrealistic expectations.
I write all this not because I have a solution to prescribe but more to encourage you to perhaps look towards therapy or other solutions- exercise can lead to good things but it's best not to have unrealistic expectations.
OP, ever since puberty I've been way too thin and I have a gigantic fucking Adam's apple that got me made fun of mercilessly in high school. I often go days without looking at myself in the mirror because I just can't stand it. I'd rate myself a solid 3/10 on a good day.
But... I've also been in some kind of relationship (girlfriends and eventually wife) continuously since I was 15.
Even today, it's sometimes hard for me to square these things in my head. But I chalk it up to something (personality, sense of humor, etc) overcoming and winning out against my innate hideousness. It will work for you, too.
But... I've also been in some kind of relationship (girlfriends and eventually wife) continuously since I was 15.
Even today, it's sometimes hard for me to square these things in my head. But I chalk it up to something (personality, sense of humor, etc) overcoming and winning out against my innate hideousness. It will work for you, too.
DodgyGeezerFella
Member
They didn't tell you about the other potential side effects ?
AuthenticM
Member
depression is a side effect. Along with a super-dry nose that will bleed every day and sometimes multiple times a day.
I know. I was on it fifteen years ago. I still deal with the occasional nose bleed and I'm pretty fucking sure that that drug is to blame for fucking up the inside of my nose.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder my dude. My nose is huge and fleshy and Im 26 and seriously balding so I only rock a buzz on my bumpy head.
I am built like a brick house though since I started to strength train. I try to acquire a lot of knowledge in order to have deep intellectual conversations, I have started to be more creative by learning to draw.
In short if you're lacking in the looks department then work on your strengths. Dont be an asshole or a "nice guy" not everyone you're attracted to will feel the same way, and that's OK. Get out more, dont be afraid to start conversations.
I am built like a brick house though since I started to strength train. I try to acquire a lot of knowledge in order to have deep intellectual conversations, I have started to be more creative by learning to draw.
In short if you're lacking in the looks department then work on your strengths. Dont be an asshole or a "nice guy" not everyone you're attracted to will feel the same way, and that's OK. Get out more, dont be afraid to start conversations.
I don't want to be a model , I just don't want to be ugly.
perfectchaos007
Member
I'm not good looking but found I'm passable in dim lighting. Helps my confidence when I go to clubs. Just gotta get out of there before 2am when the lights come on
I hear you on this one. Ive never thought Im much to look at but Ive gotten plenty of attention from women over the years that would make you assume I look better to them then I do to myself.
In any case what helped me was confidence in how I walk and carry myself (dont walk with your shoulders slumped and head looking at the ground for example). Plus, be sure you keep yourself cleaned up (good haircut, if you have facial hair keep it groomed), and wear good looking clothes (it doesnt have to be anything fancy). Just those things alone can make a world of difference.
If you think you are overweight or too skinny, hit the gym and start eating right. Getting in shape can do wonders for your self confidence.
Soul of the Beast
Member
Life isn't fair, but you can make it better.
Work out, you might not be handsome or beautiful, but you can at least be hot and fuckable.
Learn how to dress, give yourself some style.
Be confident, back in high school I have friends that are just effin ugly, but they don't mind and usually just laugh it off when people make fun of them, and those people end up with A LOT of friends and never had any trouble getting a girlfriend.
There're something charming and respectable about a person that don't mind their natural shortcomings and just laugh it off, I love just how happy and confident they are.
God gave them an ugly face, they flip the middle finger and say ''Try harder will ya?''
These people are king and queen inside, they are the fucking boss. They rule their own life and never let anyone's judgement affect their self esteem, instead their attitude changed how others feel about them. It's amazing.
Accept that you are ugly and then move on, this might sound cruel but you will see the world differently, there's more to life than looking good, and if you really want to look good, it's not very hard. Learn how to dress and start making your body look good, unless your face look like Deadpool without the mask, no one is gonna find you unattractive. Trust me.
This.
Work out, you might not be handsome or beautiful, but you can at least be hot and fuckable.
Learn how to dress, give yourself some style.
Be confident, back in high school I have friends that are just effin ugly, but they don't mind and usually just laugh it off when people make fun of them, and those people end up with A LOT of friends and never had any trouble getting a girlfriend.
There're something charming and respectable about a person that don't mind their natural shortcomings and just laugh it off, I love just how happy and confident they are.
God gave them an ugly face, they flip the middle finger and say ''Try harder will ya?''
These people are king and queen inside, they are the fucking boss. They rule their own life and never let anyone's judgement affect their self esteem, instead their attitude changed how others feel about them. It's amazing.
Accept that you are ugly and then move on, this might sound cruel but you will see the world differently, there's more to life than looking good, and if you really want to look good, it's not very hard. Learn how to dress and start making your body look good, unless your face look like Deadpool without the mask, no one is gonna find you unattractive. Trust me.
This.
UnObtainium17
Member
Honestly one of the best posts I've read here on gaf. 🐐
hydragonwarrior
Member
Not gonna lie, but i'm surprised you don't already have a girlfriend. Why? Because you're probably going to not be as shallow as a lot of us out there.
You are going to care a lot more about your other strengths and probably look towards finding someone who likes you for who you are, and not what you look like. You'd be surprised how many women out there want the same.
And tbh once you have someone who likes you for the same reasons, it's pretty damn good. Honestly, the whole looks thing is overblown mainly by people who are still stuck in the whole " i want to be a pornstar dating models every night" phase (which goes away once they are actually in a relatinship).
Also to throw out there - look at every relationship and loving partnership or successful marriage out there. You tell me if each and every one of them look like glamarous models (both guy and girl).
You are going to care a lot more about your other strengths and probably look towards finding someone who likes you for who you are, and not what you look like. You'd be surprised how many women out there want the same.
And tbh once you have someone who likes you for the same reasons, it's pretty damn good. Honestly, the whole looks thing is overblown mainly by people who are still stuck in the whole " i want to be a pornstar dating models every night" phase (which goes away once they are actually in a relatinship).
Also to throw out there - look at every relationship and loving partnership or successful marriage out there. You tell me if each and every one of them look like glamarous models (both guy and girl).
Karsticles
Member
Depression isn't really a side effect. A Michigan legislator's son killed himself while on it, and the guy didn't want to take responsibility for not being there for him, so he passed a law stating that all doctors have to tell their patients about "the risks" of acutane. I was on it and didn't feel any different emotionally.
But who gets to decide which facial features are terrible? I'm mean isn't beauty subjective?
Clay Davis
Member
Good morning, Gaf. Everyone having a good weekend?
Flowmoney, believe me when I tell you you're not as ugly as you've convinced you are. I've been where you are, I had no confidence in myself, I believed I was as hideous and ugly as my ex used to tell me I was and would routinely think about not going out and not wanting to talk to people.
It's hard to break out of the cycle of hatred you start to feel, you start to pity yourself, you start to hate that you were born this way and there's a lot of "why me" too, but that's not helpful at all, Flowmoney. You need to break the cycle, I know how hard it is to do it, I still have days where I can't maintain eye contact with anyone and hate how I look, but it's a process and on those days, you have to believe in yourself even more.
Please seek professional help and if that's not possible, talk to friends or private message me or others on here too. Gaf is an incredible source of support and advice, please don't feel like you can't reach out to someone.
It might be clichéd to say this, but looks aren't everything. Work on being the person you want others to be towards you. Trust me when I tell you that you will attract a lot of amazing people into your life this way, people who will nourish your soul and elevate your life in a way you never thought possible
Flowmoney, believe me when I tell you you're not as ugly as you've convinced you are. I've been where you are, I had no confidence in myself, I believed I was as hideous and ugly as my ex used to tell me I was and would routinely think about not going out and not wanting to talk to people.
It's hard to break out of the cycle of hatred you start to feel, you start to pity yourself, you start to hate that you were born this way and there's a lot of "why me" too, but that's not helpful at all, Flowmoney. You need to break the cycle, I know how hard it is to do it, I still have days where I can't maintain eye contact with anyone and hate how I look, but it's a process and on those days, you have to believe in yourself even more.
Please seek professional help and if that's not possible, talk to friends or private message me or others on here too. Gaf is an incredible source of support and advice, please don't feel like you can't reach out to someone.
It might be clichéd to say this, but looks aren't everything. Work on being the person you want others to be towards you. Trust me when I tell you that you will attract a lot of amazing people into your life this way, people who will nourish your soul and elevate your life in a way you never thought possible
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
That's going a bit far now. Just because someone's ugly doesn't mean they can't also be shallow. People like to reach for the stars no matter their height.
AuthenticM
Member
The link between acutane and depression is documented, which I'm sure is what pushed my Canadian doctor to tell me about the side-effect, and not some Michigan anecdote. The higher the concentration of the medication, the more chances there are for the patient to develop depression. It was true in my case.
Risible
Member
Uhhh, just took a look at that, and trust me when I say do NOT do this. It seems like a huge redpill/MRA kinda thing.
Messofanego
Banned
incels are the next level from mgtow. It's hilariously sad. At least they're taking themselves out of the equation so women don't have to come across their toxic beliefs.
I read that too! I was reading about how there is no precise correlation between depression and accutane... which is why I'm honestly not worried about it. I've been reading people's experiences online and most did not have a problem with it. My doctor told me all of her patients have little to no side effects from it and that if there was ever a problem I could call her and stop taking it. I just don't think it's right for people to spout "don't take accutane" without following up reasons why.
Yep, absolutely.
I used to dismiss it when I was young ,but being ugly is a huge thing.
Anything that's outwardly about you (your looks,voice,outfit,manner of speech) will hugely skew people's perception to the +ive or -ive.
Its that snappy,shallow and simple.EVERYONE DOES IT(ugly people aren't exempt)
It basically should've been one of Kant's categorical imperatives. Its just a part of how people perceive themselves and others.
Anything that's outwardly about you (your looks,voice,outfit,manner of speech) will hugely skew people's perception to the +ive or -ive.
Its that snappy,shallow and simple.EVERYONE DOES IT(ugly people aren't exempt)
It basically should've been one of Kant's categorical imperatives. Its just a part of how people perceive themselves and others.
hydragonwarrior
Member
Will we judge based on appearance for people you do not know or won't have time to know? Of course. We see and do it all the time in media and none of us are innocent of making a judgement simply based on appearance. Or even in passing on the bus or while driving.
But can you say to the friend or relative you've known for years that you wouldn't want to know them cause they don't look perfect or model like? Hell no. You like them past looks and it's because of a bond that far surpasses whatever the look like.
Of course some people build the biggest internal walls that prevents them from making friends simply based on appearance. That's backed by their own beliefs and tie-ins to appearance. Theres no right or wrong here - it's up to them and everyone has them, for better or for worse.
But that's then a choice for you. Some walls are never worth climbing and never worth the effort and it's just not worth pursuing people like that, and it would be just as much on the other end.
Which is why you'll find people who aren't very shallow or picky or judgmental just get along with everyone and are pretty happy. The world is big and you will find many, many of these people out there, men and women! Those with very few walls. A big step towards this is just go ahead and hostel at a few different cities and meet people from different places!
And finally to OP again - don't forget, NOBODY ON THIS EARTH WAS BORN PERFECT. Say it, and feel more comfortable being human and hence being yourself! And yeah it's a bit corny for a Sunday but who doesn't like corn on Sundays?
It's not your ugliness that haunts you; it's your fixation with it. Seriously, I think it happens to everyone, that at some point we fixate on a flaw and it can make us spiral. Like when someone tells you not to think about something ... it's way hard to not think about it.
You have to make an active effort to break the cycle ... like when you think about it, take a positive action or focus on a positive trait. This may sound stupid, but doing yoga poses isn't a bad way to get rid of negative thoughts. I think it's because not only are you doing something physical, you're having to think about it and it takes your mind of the bad thing to focus on not falling over or doing it wrong.
But, whatever it takes, whatever works for you, break the cycle of thinking about it.
I'll be honest with you -- I often think the same thing about myself, but I still ended up pretty happy: I have a pretty wife, 4 cats, a cool step-kid, and a good life ... I can still get caught in the negative thoughts, but I'll do some sort of action to break free.
TheContact
Member
if you think youre ugly work hard to build a nice body. It will all change for you