duckroll said:
I think there is a problem with this theory. Do I think that if someone admits to being a pedophile we should tie him up and burn him? Not at all. But should someone who admits to being a pedophile be allowed to work with children, or be allowed in positions of employment or social service which puts them in prolonged close contact with children? I do not believe they should be.
nor do it. and i think that's a win for everyone, the pedophile included.
Here's the problem. If you are a pedophile, you have an urge to want to be in romantic and/or sexual relationships with children. You might not be a predator, a violent abuser, or even a rapist in a common sense. You could be a totally normal guy, nice and friendly, etc. But you have a -problem-. If you are a social worker, and one day you are put in a position where a child you fancy happens to return those feelings, any relationship you have with the child is a crime and is wrong because it would be taking advantage of your position as an adult.
first of all, i hate the whole 'rape rape' thing. it's all rape, legally speaking. we can argue specific cases shouldn't be classed as rape, like say, a 15 year old and a 16 year old in a state that doesn't allow it, but that just mudies the waters. that that shouldn't be classed as rape doesn't mean that we need a term like rape rape.
if someone has those urges in this climate, they will deny them, to themself, and may end up in a position whereby they have some authority over a child. no one wants to admit they are what society paints as a monster, and i think ironically that pushes some people closer to becoming monsters.
This is not the classical bullshit about how a gay man working in an all male environment might be unable to control his urges and rape someone. That is bullshit because clearly being homosexual does not make you a rapist. If a gay man gets in a relationship with another gay man, that is between them, and as long as they are consenting adults, it's their choice. With a pedophile, it doesn't matter if it is rape-rape or not-rape-rape or whatever. The moment a pedophile begins to act on their impulse in ANY way, it is unacceptable. It seems everyone here also agrees that it should NOT be made acceptable.
because it causes harm to children. there's no debate about that. we know it to be true. it isn't a question of morality.
but i think a similar distinction exists amongst pedophiles. i think there are pedophiles who are sexually attracted to children in the same way that gay people are attracted to the same sex. obviously one is a healthy urge and one isn't, but i think the same kind of desires exist.
we know there are pedophiles who want to rape children, because it makes them feel powerful, because they like the thought of corrupting an innocent and screwing them up for life.
those two groups aren't equivalent, but again, most people won't ever make that distinction because they don't want to be see as condoning pedophilia.
both are a problem, and anyone with those desires needs help, but they aren't equivalent problems, and unless you don't believe the first group exist, suggesting that they would rape a child is similar to suggesting the gay man would rape someone. not equivalent, because it's easier to convince or dupe a child into sex than it is a grown adult, and some pedophiles use the fact they weren't physically violent to condone their horrible behaviour, but i hope you see what i'm trying to say here.
So with that in mind, being a pedophile will always be a stigma. It is a problem. It is not socially or legally accepted, and will never be. Admitting you are a pedophile will mean that you automatically lose certain rights. That's just how it is. We don't have to hate someone just because he has such a problem, but there will always be a distance between them and normal people. That stigma cannot be removed because there is a constant danger to our children. It is not intolerance, it is reality.
the loss of rights doesn't need to be something negative though. people with certain mental disabilities or diseases lose rights too, but it's as much for their own good as it is for other peoples.
we can help them, and we should, because helping a pedophile resist their urges is good for everyone.
MetalAlien said:
Don't give them any ideas. They might make sex between people who are both underage a crime.
in some states it is, if the age difference is beyond a certain number of years, but that can go both ways. in some of those states you have to be at least two years older than someone below the age of consent to be guilty of anything.
so a seventeen year old can legally have sex with a fifteen year old, but a sixteen year old can't have sex with a thirteen year old.
it's still flawed, but it makes more sense than drawing a hard line accross at any age.