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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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Your specific case, maybe though there have been people with the same kinda nerdy introvertness who refused to take any advice
DatingGAF tried to help JadedWriter...
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Hmm, shit, ok. I really like this pic of me haha
Better take some time to photoshop her ass out then.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
5 is my magic number

Damn, so like, 3 from you and 2 from her and you have a date? I need to get on talks level. Haha

DatingGAF tried to help JadedWriter...
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Better take some time to photoshop her ass out then.

I'm fairly versed in photoshop, I just thought that would make it weirder. Seeing someone photoshopped out of a pic. I thought it lended more of a welcoming vibe, since it's me in a picture with a girl I guess lol.
 
I'm fairly versed in photoshop, I just thought that would make it weirder. Seeing someone photoshopped out of a pic. I thought it lended more of a welcoming vibe, since it's me in a picture with a girl I guess lol.
Do you pay more attention to the woman or the dudes in the woman's pics? I personally don't want to see another man and if I do at some point I would like to see a black dude in a pic. Like I'm not going to swipe left over it, but I'm definitely going to cock an eyebrow a tad.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
Do you pay more attention to the woman or the dudes in the woman's pics? I personally don't want to see another man and if I do at some point I would like to see a black dude in a pic. Like I'm not going to swipe left over it, but I'm definitely going to cock an eyebrow a tad.

Wait what? You instantly lost me with the black dude part of that.

Also, as long as they're not clearly a couple it doesn't bother me at all.
 
Ever notice how if the pic is of two or more women, it's always the profile of ugliest one?

At least if the pic is of a dude and a chick, I know exactly what I'm getting without any detective work.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
Ever notice how if the pic is of two or more women, it's always the profile of ugliest one?

At least if the pic is of a dude and a chick, I know exactly what I'm getting without any detective work.

It wouldn't be the main picture, just like third on the list or so.

And yeah, I know what you mean.
 

WolfeTone

Member
Wait what? You instantly lost me with the black dude part of that.

Also, as long as they're not clearly a couple it doesn't bother me at all.

I think it depends on the viewer. I never assume it's an ex and pictures with another dude would never deter me from swiping right.

Many female friends have told me that they assume any girl in a photo is an ex and swipe left immediately. Picky for sure but girls have almost infinite options on tinder. Don't give them another reason to swipe left.

Can you crop the girl out of the photo you like?
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
I think it depends on the viewer. I never assume it's an ex and pictures with another dude would never deter me from swiping right.

Many female friends have told me that they assume any girl in a photo is an ex and swipe left immediately. Picky for sure but girls have almost infinite options on tinder. Don't give them another reason to swipe left.

Can you crop the girl out of the photo you like?

Eh, it would make it look like I definitely cropped someone out on purpose. It's like the least cuddled up pic we have together, and it's clearly taken by someone else if that counts. Idk.

So it's just me that looks at the friends they include in their pics?

No, I do. I just don't really mind who they're with. Idk. Just caught me off guard.
 
Eh, it would make it look like I definitely cropped someone out on purpose. It's like the least cuddled up pic we have together, and it's clearly taken by someone else if that counts. Idk.



No, I do. I just don't really mind who they're with. Idk. Just caught me off guard.
I have a lot of thought processes that I should just try not to think with. Regarding your pic it just sounds like you should not use it.
 
Man, that was a relatively rough day.

Got a text this afternoon: "I don't see this going anywhere romantic for me." Well, no kidding, I didn't either, but it's not great to hear.

Then I had a date earlier this evening which didn't go well either. I thought the conversation was pretty free-flowing and we had things in common, and she was definitely super attractive. We definitely hit a groove there, and there was laughing back and forth.

Then we discovered we both work for the same agency and we're both maybe losing our jobs, leading us to talk about THAT for 20 minutes. I tried to derail this, but nope, wasn't happening.

When things end with her saying, "I can't wait to tell my boss tomorrow that I went out on a date and how crazy this was," ... yeah. I've got a similar story to tell, at least. Guess it was worth the price of dinner.

Ugh, I hate dating.
 
You swipe left if a girl doesn't have a pic with a black guy? Or if you get the impression that all her friends are white?

How do you feel about pictures with a bunch of African children?
In this day and age I do find it a bit weird if a person only has friends of the same race they are. People are interesting, regardless of race. Do I swipe left over it no, does it make me think a bit? yes.
 
Girl I was gonna meet tonight cancelled due to being sick with allergies. Had plenty of nice texts as we talked about it though so I believe her (especially with the big weather changes here recently). We'll see, I'd rather see her on the weekend if possible anyway.
 

AcridMeat

Banned
Catching up on the thread since I read it during certain points of the day. Nerdiest stuff I have out and about is a Blitzcrank figure that was a gift last Christmas, a dickbutt ornament which is by monitor, and these two Tim Doyle prints framed. OIther prints I have on the wall are Tycho art.
Hufflepuff is goddamn insult. Ghost the fuck outta her.
Next thread title.
Hmm, shit, ok. I really like this pic of me haha
So crop it or use artistic prowess on her.
Ugh, I hate dating.
Sorry to hear it, some weeks are worse than others. Took me 4 dates in a couple weeks to dislike it again. My best prospects now aren't available until next week or the week after, but I'm not really feeling antsy at the moment. I put more focus in donating old clothes and cleaning my room up instead which has been satisfying. Going to get back at it this weekend a lot more.

Oh also, I forgot who mentioned Express for clothing, but I agree. I actually just got a couple nice shirts on sale from there. I didn't bring them up because they're pretty pricey for what you're getting but I like the quality.
 

Salamando

Member
That would be me lol



It really was. Ugh.

You're not that much of an outlier. I know more asexual females than I do men who begged for another date in public...

Actually had a nice conversation with her about the plight of the asexual last weekend. She's a black, asexual, female engineer, and is quite fed up with how little representation any part of her gets in media. Like how in most TV shows, sex is seen as the pinnacle of relationships, whereas she'd like to see more that were about a deep partnership without the sex. Or how a foreigner from Europe will come from a specific country, but a foreigner from Africa is just African.
 
well, I screwed up and gone a bit head over heels with this one girl I know. Problem: she's a grad student on a exchange program finishing in two months, so I know if were something to happen it ain't now; there's this nagging feeling that tells me where she here on a longer term basis we would hit off. So, I'll just keep sporadically going out with her and getting to know her more; and not get attached too much.
 
well, I screwed up and gone a bit head over heels with this one girl I know. Problem: she's a grad student on a exchange program finishing in two months, so I know if were something to happen it ain't now; there's this nagging feeling that tells me where she here on a longer term basis we would hit off. So, I'll just keep sporadically going out with her and getting to know her more; and not get attached too much.

Where's she going back to? Maybe it's time to make an international move and live an adventure for a while!
 
Where's she going back to? Maybe it's time to make an international move and live an adventure for a while!
Either Poland or her native country, at her stage though, she's more likely to move back here though or go somewhere else, so I dunno, we'll see. I've already had my international move fun times a couple times before.
 

vern

Member
Is using a picture of you with your ex on Tinder ok? I have a picture I love of myself and it has her in it. It doesn't look like a couple pic, just friends or something.

I can PM it for approval I guess

Use it if you look good, but use catwang or similar app on your girls face so no one will recognize her and so girls will swipe you and be like "lol wtf is your photo?"




Kind of falling for a girl. Only problem is she's just in china for the summer before she goes back to uni in Canada. Also she's in beijing and I'm in shanghai. But I went up there once and she's been down here for a few days. She's coming again next week. She's perfect (I know lol) ... but really she's pretty awesome. Looks incredible, super smart, 20 years old, rich , freak in the sheets (dat north American high school and college experience learned her well) . She says she's into me too and it's pretty clear she is, but she's realistic and says it should just be for the summer when we can get at it, she'll be back in college far from here in a few months and she doesn't wanna do the long distance thing. I can't blame her I don't want that either. I told her to drop out of school or transfer back to china 🤦🏼*♂️. Anyway will see how it goes, but haven't been this smitten since I was 19. Not really sure I'm looking for advice... as usual I'll probably be over her in a few weeks or less. But this one feels different somehow.
 
well, I screwed up and gone a bit head over heels with this one girl I know. Problem: she's a grad student on a exchange program finishing in two months, so I know if were something to happen it ain't now; there's this nagging feeling that tells me where she here on a longer term basis we would hit off. So, I'll just keep sporadically going out with her and getting to know her more; and not get attached too much.

The way I see it, you might as well act now. I'd personally regret it, and the what is would bother me.

What's the worse that could happen? You could spend 2 months wit an awesome person? There are worse fates.
 

gaiages

Banned
This thread gets gold when a new villain emerges and everyone gets their shots in.

Many laughs are had and lessons are learned.

And if we're lucky we see them learn from their lessons and actually make decent progress.

Wait so I'm not an outlier?

Nope, we've seen far worse than you.

I remember Johnny bragging about getting a girl wet or something. I thought that was weird.

It's amazing how humble he was about it /s

Do you pay more attention to the woman or the dudes in the woman's pics? I personally don't want to see another man and if I do at some point I would like to see a black dude in a pic. Like I'm not going to swipe left over it, but I'm definitely going to cock an eyebrow a tad.

Uh, hm.

That doesn't sound the way you think it sounds.
 
Nope, we've seen far worse than you.

Uh, hm.

That doesn't sound the way you think it sounds.
I'm aware that that statement is a bit fucked up, realized that as I was trying to explain it to somebody and then just proceeded to nope out of it as I was typing it. I think my reply to WolfeTone accurately portrays what I originally meant without coming off as a nutcase. People worse than me sound a bit scary. I'm a bit of a social idiot that dangerously lacks self awareness, but I'd never wish to hurt anybody during the date.
 
Being an idiot is one thing. I'm one too. One doesnt care to acknowledge the mistakes of one's youth, but I've made my own fuck ups. But you don't dwell on them. You learn from them though.

There are people here that activity want to hurt people. You don't want to hurt people.

Date night. I can't wait to see her. Its been way too long
 
Being an idiot is one thing. I'm one too. One doesnt care to acknowledge the mistakes of one's youth, but I've made my own fuck ups. But you don't dwell on them. You learn from them though.

There are people here that activity want to hurt people. You don't want to hurt people.
No I've been hurt enough, why would I want to spread that to someone else? People with destructive mindsets like that should be culled from the dating pool. Nobody needs, wants or should even have to endure those types of relationships. I've been dropped cold turkey by women and still don't wish any kind of emotional torment on them.
 

Leeness

Member
You're not that much of an outlier. I know more asexual females than I do men who begged for another date in public...

Actually had a nice conversation with her about the plight of the asexual last weekend. She's a black, asexual, female engineer, and is quite fed up with how little representation any part of her gets in media. Like how in most TV shows, sex is seen as the pinnacle of relationships, whereas she'd like to see more that were about a deep partnership without the sex. Or how a foreigner from Europe will come from a specific country, but a foreigner from Africa is just African.

Aw. Your friend sounds cool. Would also like to see things like that on TV...

Oh well. 😥
 

WolfeTone

Member
You're not that much of an outlier. I know more asexual females than I do men who begged for another date in public...

Actually had a nice conversation with her about the plight of the asexual last weekend. She's a black, asexual, female engineer, and is quite fed up with how little representation any part of her gets in media. Like how in most TV shows, sex is seen as the pinnacle of relationships, whereas she'd like to see more that were about a deep partnership without the sex. Or how a foreigner from Europe will come from a specific country, but a foreigner from Africa is just African.

I also have an asexual female friend and honestly, asexuality is the least weird thing about her. She goes on lots of 'friend dates' from tinder. I often wonder what kind of reaction guys have to her.

She also lives in Vancouver Leeness! Maybe you guys can be friends. You can go on platonic double dates.
 

Leeness

Member
I also have an asexual female friend and honestly, asexuality is the least weird thing about her. She goes on lots of 'friend dates' from tinder. I often wonder what kind of reaction guys have to her.

She also lives in Vancouver Leeness! Maybe you guys can be friends. You can go on platonic double dates.

!
 
I'm aware that that statement is a bit fucked up, realized that as I was trying to explain it to somebody and then just proceeded to nope out of it as I was typing it. I think my reply to WolfeTone accurately portrays what I originally meant without coming off as a nutcase.

I dunno where you live but it's a weird desire tbh. I'm also a black guy. If I got disappointed everytime there wasn't a black person in a girl's dating profile I'd be in endless sadness. Who you're friends with depends so much on socio economic factors, up bringing, location, what schools you went to, country etc that it's a largely pointless thing to tweak about man. For a lot of my friends, I'm the only black person they probably would have a picture with. It's not something deserving of any stock unless you live in like Nigeria or some shit lol.
 
Kind of falling for a girl. Only problem is she's just in china for the summer before she goes back to uni in Canada. Also she's in beijing and I'm in shanghai. But I went up there once and she's been down here for a few days. She's coming again next week. She's perfect (I know lol) ... but really she's pretty awesome. Looks incredible, super smart, 20 years old, rich , freak in the sheets (dat north American high school and college experience learned her well) . She says she's into me too and it's pretty clear she is, but she's realistic and says it should just be for the summer when we can get at it, she'll be back in college far from here in a few months and she doesn't wanna do the long distance thing. I can't blame her I don't want that either. I told her to drop out of school or transfer back to china 🤦🏼*♂️. Anyway will see how it goes, but haven't been this smitten since I was 19. Not really sure I'm looking for advice... as usual I'll probably be over her in a few weeks or less. But this one feels different somehow.

You don't need the competition of her mixing with other Western guys AND you acknowledge that is an influence. You're living in the candy shop, lots of choice each day, anyway I doubt if she is rich her parents would decide you are the one to make it worth sending her abroad for. You know how this goes, don't over invest.
 
Being an idiot is one thing. I'm one too. One doesnt care to acknowledge the mistakes of one's youth, but I've made my own fuck ups. But you don't dwell on them. You learn from them though.

There are people here that activity want to hurt people. You don't want to hurt people.

Date night. I can't wait to see her. Its been way too long

Too long? Still under 7 days you love sick puppy.
 
I dunno where you live but it's a weird desire tbh. I'm also a black guy. If I got disappointed everytime there wasn't a black person in a girl's dating profile I'd be in endless sadness. Who you're friends with depends so much on socio economic factors, up bringing, location, what schools you went to, country etc that it's a largely pointless thing to tweak about man. For a lot of my friends, I'm the only black person they probably would have a picture with. It's not something deserving of any stock unless you live in like Nigeria or some shit lol.
I'm in NYC and in an earlier statement I pretty much did say that I just find it weird if people are only friends with people of their own race. I think I've gotten less judgmental with it and I'm not going to not date a person over it, it's just weird to me since I've pretty much had friends of various nationalities since I've been in college. My best friend is Indian, I guess I just find monorace cliques mundane.
 
I'm in NYC and in an earlier statement I pretty much did say that I just find it weird if people are only friends with people of their own race.

Well NYC is pretty diverse but gotta remember. If you are a minority you are far more likely to have friends that are other races just due to basic math. Also, you are at best looking at a snippet of the people someone is friends with just based on a dating profile. 6 pictures at best dont tell a life story. You know that.

I think I've gotten less judgmental with it and I'm not going to not date a person over it, it's just weird to me since I've pretty much had friends of various nationalities since I've been in college. My best friend is Indian, I guess I just find monorace cliques mundane.

Like I said, it's a mixture of so many possible factors it's kind of weird to call it "mudane". Is it mudane if you grow up in a non diverse environment? Where I grew up the most diversiry you would find was when one of the like 10 minority families had a BBQ lmao. Ot's a weird thing to put stock on frankly.
 
Well NYC is pretty diverse but gotta remember. If you are a minority you are far more likely to have friends that are other races just due to basic math. Also, you are at best looking at a snippet of the people someone is friends with just based on a dating profile. 6 pictures at best dont tell a life story. You know that.



Like I said, it's a mixture of so many possible factors it's kind of weird to call it "mudane". Is it mudane if you grow up in a non diverse environment? Where I grew up the most diversiry you would find was when one of the like 10 minority families had a BBQ lmao. Ot's a weird thing to put stock on frankly.
Yeah true. I went from predominately white as a kid, to more urban as a teen and then went to a hyper diverse college. I guess it is something that I really shouldn't be putting too much stock into since I don't really know anything about said person.
 
Yeah true. I went from predominately white as a kid, to more urban as a teen and then went to a hyper diverse college. I guess it is something that I really shouldn't be putting too much stock into since I don't really know anything about said person.

And again, it's still only like 5 pictures any how. I mean in elementary and secondary school I didnt attend diverse institutions since they were not in diverse locations. University my friend group naturally expanded because there was more diversity in a bigger city (and it wasnt even a diverse city or school by normal standards). But even just the residence I lived in first year down to the floor I was on made a huge difference. My floor was extremely mixed but the opposite end was extremely homogenous.

It's that arbitrary how these things turn out. That's why I suggest people don't put any real stock in it. Pictures just don't tell you anything you could base this sorta thing off.
 
Yeah true. I went from predominately white as a kid, to more urban as a teen and then went to a hyper diverse college. I guess it is something that I really shouldn't be putting too much stock into since I don't really know anything about said person.

Just saying man. On my profile, the only other people I have pictures of are my best friend and his family.

If you'd saw that, you'd think I only had white friends. He's my only white friend
 

gaiages

Banned
Jaded, I really think you need to think about what your standards are and what, exactly, is driving said standards. Almost every 'standard' you've stated thus far seems to come from a misguided place and I almost think they're actively hurting you.
 
Too long? Still under 7 days you love sick puppy.

Can't help it bruh. One day out is okay. Two days out, I start missing her for ruhs. I haven't seen her since Saturday

I miss her voice. I miss her hair. I miss the way she feels pressed up against me. I miss the way she hums randomly. I miss the cute way she says "Iunno" when I ask her a dumb ass question. I miss how sweet she is. I miss her giggle. I miss the way she says "Yay!" when she sees something that excites her. I miss the way I can be cute with her but also have adult conversations. I miss her cute dresses she likes to wear. I miss this cute dimple on her face that she hates but I absolutely adore. I miss the way she smellls. I miss the way she calls me "her hufflepuff". I miss the way she plays with my hand. I miss the way I play her her hand. I miss the way her tongue feels.

We text pretty often, but it's not the same.
 
Jaded, I really think you need to think about what your standards are and what, exactly, is driving said standards. Almost every 'standard' you've stated thus far seems to come from a misguided place and I almost think they're actively hurting you.
This is probably the most open I've been regarding dating and just never really discussed it with anybody so pretty much I had no idea how badly I was approaching it. Tack on several years of just not talking to people and over thinking every single aspect of it and yeah...no wonder why I'm having so much difficulty at it. Honestly surprised I got 14 months out of my last relationship. I discuss it with my friend but that guy is a disaster on probably a greater scale than myself so his feedback probably hinders me greatly.
 
Can't help it bruh. One day out is okay. Two days out, I start missing her for ruhs. I haven't seen her since Saturday

I miss her voice. I miss her hair. I miss the way she feels pressed up against me. I miss the way she hums randomly. I miss the cute way she says "Iunno" when I ask her a dumb ass question. I miss how sweet she is. I miss her giggle. I miss the way she says "Yay!" when she sees something that excites her. I miss the way I can be cute with her but also have adult conversations. I miss her cute dresses she likes to wear. I miss this cute dimple on her face that she hates but I absolutely adore. I miss the way she smellls. I miss the way she calls me "her hufflepuff". I miss the way she plays with my hand. I miss the way I play her her hand. I miss the way her tongue feels.

We text pretty often, but it's not the same.

You might want to consider at this point if you are oversharing.
 
Can't help it bruh. One day out is okay. Two days out, I start missing her for ruhs. I haven't seen her since Saturday

I miss her voice. I miss her hair. I miss the way she feels pressed up against me. I miss the way she hums randomly. I miss the cute way she says "Iunno" when I ask her a dumb ass question. I miss how sweet she is. I miss her giggle. I miss the way she says "Yay!" when she sees something that excites her. I miss the way I can be cute with her but also have adult conversations. I miss her cute dresses she likes to wear. I miss this cute dimple on her face that she hates but I absolutely adore. I miss the way she smellls. I miss the way she calls me "her hufflepuff". I miss the way she plays with my hand. I miss the way I play her her hand. I miss the way her tongue feels.

We text pretty often, but it's not the same.

Bruh.
 
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