Messofanego
Banned
Just promise us you'll never get back with her again.
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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
- Thread starter gaiages
- Start date
- Status
Gotdatmoney
Member
Delete her from all social media. Block numbers. More than anything else, please God, do not open any channel of communication with her.
PixelatedBookake
Junior Member
What do you guys think is a good way to meet girls over the summer? Due to my summer job, I feel like it's harder to meet new people on a regular basis. Summer school starts in about a week for me, so I'd at least have a reason to be at school for a minute, but campus is mostly dead during the summer. I've been spending the last 8 months working on myself and I feel like I wanna try to be in a relationship soon. Any suggestions?
I already did, thank you though.
What I'm trying to figure out is why I still feel so attached to her. I feel like any action I take towards moving on is wrong. Every time I think about any good memory with her I just break down. I miss her badly even though almost every day it was emotionally painful for me.
This was my first real relationship too, at 22 years old. That's why I don't know what I'm doing or why I feel these things right now.
Count Dookkake
Member
At the pool or in some co-ed sports league.
Gotdatmoney
Member
I mean, you probably spent a bunch of time with her, you had lots of new experience, you had consistent sex with her (assumption but probably safe) and she was a consistent part of your life for 7ish months. Even if she was a shit person, it would be weird if you had no attachment for a relationship that long. So I mean, if you're still attached quite frankly that's normal man. That's nothing to be ashamed of or feel bad about.
It's a learning experience. Remember the good times you had fondly. No need to be bitter and feel like remembering it is bad. Just understand that sometimes stuff doesn't work out and you have to look forward to all the awesome experiences that are waiting for you in the future.
Only 22? You're young too. So that's a bonus haha. Protip, most of us still dunno what the fuck were doing
You just take it one day at a time and it figures itself out. (or so I tell myself haha)always crazy bacon
Banned
She didn't even keep him on the back burner, she totally ghosted him. She'll be telling herself "I could do better than NTGYK if I wanted too but" reasons.
Messofanego
Banned
Had a fun date today. Went first to a Costa, I had a water bottle so I didn't need anything and just waited for her to pay but then she asked why don't I get something and I thought why not try something new so I went for a cookie mocha. Before I know it, she's already paid for me haha! I was like you didn't have to but she replied "it's just a coffee ". Had a well-flowing conversation there. Walked to a park and sat down on the grass in the lovely sunny weather, chatted some more. Ended the date by going to the Las Vegas Arcade here in Leicester Square, paid for her so we could play pool, Street Fighter (beat her in that), and Tekken (she beat me on that). She was proper into the fighting games! Asked her if she wanted to meet up for a second date after Ramadan, she's up for it. She hinted that she'd be down to do something more active so if the second date happens, we'll do something more thrill seeking (she's already done a bungee jump while I haven't lol). We match on interests and as people, but if a second date happens, I need to flirt more.
". Had a well-flowing conversation there. Walked to a park and sat down on the grass in the lovely sunny weather, chatted some more. Ended the date by going to the Las Vegas Arcade here in Leicester Square, paid for her so we could play pool, Street Fighter (beat her in that), and Tekken (she beat me on that). She was proper into the fighting games! Asked her if she wanted to meet up for a second date after Ramadan, she's up for it. She hinted that she'd be down to do something more active so if the second date happens, we'll do something more thrill seeking (she's already done a bungee jump while I haven't lol). We match on interests and as people, but if a second date happens, I need to flirt more.always crazy bacon
Banned
Congrats.
I mean, you probably spent a bunch of time with her, you had lots of new experience, you had consistent sex with her (assumption but probably safe) and she was a consistent part of your life for 7ish months. Even if she was a shit person, it would be weird if you had no attachment for a relationship that long. So I mean, if you're still attached quite frankly that's normal man. That's nothing to be ashamed of or feel bad about.
It's a learning experience. Remember the good times you had fondly. No need to be bitter and feel like remembering it is bad. Just understand that sometimes stuff doesn't work out and you have to look forward to all the awesome experiences that are waiting for you in the future.
Only 22? You're young too. So that's a bonus haha. Protip, most of us still dunno what the fuck were doing
Thank you. I don't know how to put into words but I really appreciate the help, and from everyone else that replied to me as well. I feel better, and I'll try my best to move on. It'll still hurt for a while, but I'll keep looking forward to the future.
It's partly my fault that she broke up with me though. I have ADHD and it had a really negative impact on the relationship. She just got tired of my shit, which I understand completely.
always crazy bacon
Banned
What happens when you break up with someone in your situation is that your brain starts to retcon everything and delete the bad memories and just focus on the good ones. When you recognise this behaviour you'll be able to control you emotions better. Best get out there and start looking for someone new, 22 is still young.
always crazy bacon
Banned
It's not your fault, stop with that shit right now. I lived with a guy that had ADHD and it was fine becuse he'd explain his behaviours and the ones he didn't know he had I understood why. If your own girlfriend wasn't capable of that too, that's on her.
It's OK. I'm 22 too and I was in a similar situation (just instead of 7 months it was 7 years
wouldn't say it was an abusive relationship but at the end she left me for another guy) and there are people in this thread that have already given you good advice here.Believe me, it gets better. You need to start working on you, that means, if you need to go to therapy, do it. Start working out, I go to the gym but you can do something else like boxing or joining a basketball/soccer/etc. team. Do something to expand your horizons like cooking, play some instrument or another hobby of your interest. Start focusing on what you want to do as your career (I assume you go to school).
Eventually, you will stop thinking about your ex 24/7 and feeling sick just for that. Of course you won't forget everything but whenever you remember something good just smile and be thankful you had the opportunity to live that and if the bad memories come back, just think that how we deal with tragedy defines who we are. Someday you will feel ready to get back into the dating world, like I'm doing right now. We are young man haha.
If you need someone to talk to, you're welcome to PM me.
I assume this has already been asked, but have there been examples of gaffers successfully dating other gaffers, and possibly after reading this thread? Iknow some people from gaming communities wo intially met through irc and whose relationship worked very well, so i wonder.
always crazy bacon
Banned
Tred carefully, Just becuse they reply to your posts does not mean anything is there and the chance of a backfire is high. There's lots of dating apps for that.
I think you need NeoGAF Gold to see the NeoGAF Hook up [OT]
Megalosaro
Banned
As of this week, I work near LAX. I left work at 330. I have to be to Irvine by 530.
I havent made it to the 710 yet. Fuck the 405 lol.
Do I have a shot?
I havent made it to the 710 yet. Fuck the 405 lol.
Do I have a shot?
timetokill
Banned
1. Recognize that what you're feeling is valid, that you're not wrong for feeling the way you do, and most importantly that it's NOT YOUR FAULT.
2. Erase everything of hers from your life. Delete her number, her emails, throw her stuff away in your room, everything.
3. Seriously consider therapy. When my wife left me I went into a pretty black spiral, and therapy helped a lot, and I wish I'd done it sooner.
4. Prepare yourself for her return, because if she is as abusive and controlling as she said, she'll want another hit of the feeling she gets from treating you that way. You need to be ready to stand up to her, respect yourself and say gtfo.
always crazy bacon
Banned
That reminds me , I need to renew my membership. Thanks!
JadedWriter
Member
It's one of my favorite anime arcs. That ending is heart breaking on so many levels.
ZackieChan
Member
We did it brehs. Girlfriend status confirmed. Cute, age appropriate, decent job, well educated, it's all good. Moved into exclusivity pretty quick, but I'm happy with it. Now to let all my other suitors down...
If she's LA-based, she will understand.
If she's LA-based, she will understand.
JadedWriter
Member
Congrats. I hope you two can survive the many challenges of life together.
ZackieChan
Member
My life is basically challenge-free 😇
:O Yay!
That's the hardest part, telling the other ones you are seeing a girl. I am not sure if I should do the same, since my current girl I talked about yesterday is leaving in a couple months anyway. Maybe I should just keep my other suitors on the backburner, tell them I'm busy, check in every once in awhile with a good morning... lol life is difficult.
JadedWriter
Member
Some how I doubt this to be true.
Dude he's like me. A white professional dude in Asia. This is very true.
JadedWriter
Member
Why the fuck am I playing real life Bloodborne?
I know you aren't white but I told you to gtfo of New York and get to Asia long ago. Not just for girls, but to actually have a decent, comfortable, succesful life. Being middle class in the US sucks man, it's a struggle everyday. You'll never get ahead. Especially in NY where it's so damn expensive. Your choices make you play real life bloodborne. There are so many other options out there.
always crazy bacon
Banned
I actually know a decent amount who did. Two good friends met via GAF and are still happily together. I wouldn't say uh, look to this forum as an option but when opportunities present themselves why not?
Just don't post a thread about the messy break up after.
I thought you were a forever nomad? Congrats.
China GAF checking in
The only challenge I face is avoiding idiot drivers and idiots walking staring at their phones.
If I get fired I can find another good job in about 2 minutes. Any other typical "challenge " is easily faced out here. I'm always relaxed. Don't have to worry about anything.
timetokill
Banned
You're right, it's just tough to understand something so stupid getting in the way.
see you back here in 4 months
SmackDaddy
Member
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
I told my mom that I was annoyed at how my dad was doing this, she told him to quit it, he gave me a thirty minute lecture.
SmackDaddy
Member
parents just don't understand
i dont know your parents, and i have no idea what your relationship with them is like, but have you tried to have a discussion with him as opposed to getting lectured?
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
Many times. Me and my dad both have short tempers. It doesn't get far.
SmackDaddy
Member
Sucks man. give it another shot. be a mediator between you two. write him a note or something.
wait no give him a massage.
PS: today i figured out my heart is nice and strong! I fucking rekt the stress test at the cardiologist's office. So, stress is the culprit giving me heart palpitations. The only stressful thing in my life right now is dating.
When I think about people I like I uncontrollably rip ass, my heart skips around, and I get bloated feeling. Dating is literally ruining my body.
But when I'm laying around with the person I like, I'm on cloud 9. I think love will literally and figuratively save me.
ZackieChan
Member
Most are annoying atm anyway.
China GAF checking in
Thailand is similar, just really hot.
I'm based in Thailand for a year, at least. May just keep a place here so I can always come "home". I've planted the seed with her that she should take the freelance accounting she's already doing and spin that into an internet-based business. Wish me luck.
I ain't even mad
LookAtMeGo
Member
Im in love with a girl who wont give me the time of day now. I had her and I fucked it up and it wasnt until after she broke up with me I realized how much I loved her. Now I am trying to get her back without looking like a desperate fuck. Not going too well so far.. Trying to be persistent but not obssesive. Fuck me Im an idiot.
always crazy bacon
Banned
Learn from it, move on and find someone else.
LookAtMeGo
Member
Some things are worth fighting for. Shes at least talking to me again. Not a lot tho.
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
Did you cheat on her?
artsi
Member
That's a lost cause dude. Move on to girls that give a fuck (both figuratively and literally).
LookAtMeGo
Member
No. I acted like I didnt give a shit when she was giving it everything to make it work. I had recently come out of an almost 8 year relationship so when I caught feelings, instead of going for it I got all scared and got my back up against the wall and pushed her away.
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