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I just found something huge about my granpa and I think he doesn't know it
- Thread starter UnluckyKate
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100 times this; please don't forget this, OP.
IMO your grandpa should definitely know. But the choice of words is crucial.
He's got one family, and from now on, a blood/biological family.
(It doesn't make it any less of a shock, obviously!)
this is an amazing story, and after reading the 1st page one thing ocurred to me.
isn't OP's grandpa entitled to inherit something from his biological parents? apparently he was his parent's only son.
nobody knows what happened to his parents, maybe they went to amass a fortune. Maybe they fled to America or Canada or anywhere and started life anew?
in any case it would be worth investigating.
isn't OP's grandpa entitled to inherit something from his biological parents? apparently he was his parent's only son.
nobody knows what happened to his parents, maybe they went to amass a fortune. Maybe they fled to America or Canada or anywhere and started life anew?
in any case it would be worth investigating.
ClosingADoor
Member
Sit down with your mom and your grandpa's other children and figure out how to handle it. I wouldn't go and make this decision on your own, even though I think he has a right to know where he came from, as do you.
Like other posters have said, there are probably organizations that can help out if your grandpa then wants to know more.
Like other posters have said, there are probably organizations that can help out if your grandpa then wants to know more.
Naked Snake
Member
Whoa OP.
Waiting for the movie adaptation.
Waiting for the movie adaptation.
kruis
Exposing the sinister cartel of retailers who allow companies to pay for advertising space.
What I don't understand about the story is why the real birth certificate was found in the municipal archive and the one with your grand father's current last name was in that lady's personal possessions. In the Netherlands you need a birth certificate if you're getting married. If this is also the case in France, then why didn't your grandfather find out the truth when he got married many decades ago?
Given that there was a file full of documents, it's likely that they initially stashed the real ones while keeping the dupes for safe-keeping, then swapped them all out after the war for cases like these.
At this point, I'd discuss the matter with your mom and grandmom, and go from there. And if you decide to tell him, and he wants you to dig deeper, then I'd go for it, without a doubt.
En tout cas sacrée histoire, ouais
I suppose it would be nice for him to know about the sacrifice his real parents made for him, but I'm not sure it's worth the heartache it might cause. A very, very sad story that is common not only for Jewish people in WW2, but also people the world around. My eldest uncle who died when I was young was raised by my Grandad and my Nan. While he was my Nan's child, she was in love with a soldier in WW2 and he never came back. My grandad ended up raising him and if that soldier never sadly lost his life I probably wouldn't be here now. It's a very different situation I suppose given the circumstances, but at the end of it all you have to talk to your family and you all need to decide together whether he should know or not.
This is so heartbreaking. I feel like he deserves to know, but stuff like this can destroy the older generation. You know your grandfather better than us, it's up to your judgement whether you tell him or not. Either way, I'd definitely do some research and look further in to this. You might even find out the fate of his parents. Keep us updated, OP.
openrob
Member
Only after the YouTube reaction video, which will quickly go viral.
Sgt.Pepper
Banned
Damn. That's one good story.
Personally, I think your grandpa should know. If his parents died in the holocaust, and you find out who they were, he should make a tribute for those who gave him life.
It would be heartbreaking though.
Personally, I think your grandpa should know. If his parents died in the holocaust, and you find out who they were, he should make a tribute for those who gave him life.
It would be heartbreaking though.
White Wolf
Member
damn, you could adapt this into a hollywood story and get 6 oscars. leave the plot twist as last though.
Great story OP. It's not uncommon though (the 'changing identities' part, not the part where your grandfather doesn't know). My grandmother and her family also 'stopped' being Jewish during the war (just before actually, it wasn't exactly easy being Jewish even before then). It's a weird, sad bit of history but I don't blame them of course. There are quite a lot of families here that made that choice back then.
This was in the Netherlands btw.
This was in the Netherlands btw.
Cool story.
There actually is a Serbian movie with a similar theme, about the old man who finds out his real parents were Jews who died in a concentration camp.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/When_Day_Breaks
There actually is a Serbian movie with a similar theme, about the old man who finds out his real parents were Jews who died in a concentration camp.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/When_Day_Breaks
bggrthnjsus
Member
i'd definitely watch the movie version of this
write this up and sell it op
write this up and sell it op
Genuinely shocked by the amount of people that are suggesting telling him -
If you're fairly advanced in years having lived your life thinking that you were living with your biological family, and you suddenly found out that you weren't, your biological family are dead (unless your grandfather is unusually young, and his parents are unusually healthy) and you'll never get the chance to meet/know them. Added to that the adoptive parents never told him. What an absolute headfuck.
I know I certainly wouldn't want to be told.
If you're fairly advanced in years having lived your life thinking that you were living with your biological family, and you suddenly found out that you weren't, your biological family are dead (unless your grandfather is unusually young, and his parents are unusually healthy) and you'll never get the chance to meet/know them. Added to that the adoptive parents never told him. What an absolute headfuck.
I know I certainly wouldn't want to be told.
I feel similarly. Just because you've found the information out doesn't mean you're obligated to tell him. It's one hell of a relevation to have pop into your life at 80 years old.
Depends on your grandpa's fortitude, is he someone you think who could mentally handle this at his age? My grandma is 83 and I feel like if she was in this situation she could handle finding the truth and also would become very interested in the history and figuring out her roots. She's in great shape mentally for her age though, some people in their 80's would be rocked by such a finding and it could fuck up the last few years of their life.
GREAT thread though, hope you and your family can come to a decision on what to do.
PeskyToaster
Member
I would tell him who are you to keep this from him.
Amazing story, OP. The Holocaust Museum in DC has a form where you can ask them to search their databases to see if your grandfather's parents survived or were killed in the Holocaust:
https://secure.ushmm.org/individual-research//contact_form.php
https://secure.ushmm.org/individual-research//contact_form.php
Naked Snake
Member
FTFY
CrocMother
Banned
Don't underestimate the elderly. They can probably take this kind of thing better than anyone.
Naked Snake
Member
My father is 82 years old, and if this was him I'd imagine he would have wanted to know, he's obsessed with family, relatives and lineage stuff.
If it was me I would want to know too, for different reasons though. I never cared for my own family history, but I'm always for knowing the truth even if it's unpleasant.
If it was me I would want to know too, for different reasons though. I never cared for my own family history, but I'm always for knowing the truth even if it's unpleasant.
WorriedCitizen
Member
I was reading this thinking "maybe he was in the Waffen-SS during the war". Quite the plot twist in the end.
Naked Snake
Member
Holocaust... beautiful... bruh
Bluecondor
Member
Late 1800s - meaning an ancestor of your's who was born in the 1880s or 1890s had their surname changed?
If so, autosomal DNA testing (Ancestry DNA, Family Tree DNA or 23&me) is very promising for this. As I mentioned in an earlier comment in this thread, my aunt's father (Theodore) was born in Massachusetts in 1918. Just by looking at my aunt's close autosomal DNA matches with descendants of a Perry family that lived in the same town in Massachusetts at that time, it is a virtual certainty that Theodore's father was Mr. Perry, a man who rented a room from Theodore's mother.
If you have any older relatives, you should consider an autosomal DNA test, as they might have some very interesting autosomal DNA matches.
Naked Snake
Member
France, tiny village, farm, Jews... was anyone else reminded of the opening scene from Inglorious Basterds?
I didn't know religion was genetic...
although that would explain a lot
sorry, the following may sound harsh but it gets drilled pretty hard into our middle-European skulls so I just can't but lecture you for this. I know this line of thought may be normal and accepted in the US or wherever you are from (presumably) but it's pretty much the same stupid idea the Nazis followed... by pretending there is something like human races, or rather, that Jews could be classified as one of said human races and people are able to "mix" and be x% whatever just feeds into the Nazi agenda your grandpa escaped from...
Jewish is an ethnicity, the official religion of the Jewish people is Judaism, im not sure what is the reasoning for it, but the same word is used for both the ethnicity and and people who practice Judaism (i think the logic was "people who convert to judaism are honorary jewish people" but maybe someone with better knowledge can explain it).
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